The closer the time for the date was the more anxious Agatha got. Truth was that Ellis made her nervous, something about the way he behaved and looked at her, created a weird reaction inside her. The librarian reminded herself that she couldn't fall for his tricks, at least until she got to know him for real. 

"That's it. What's going on with you today?" Demir stopped her track of thoughts "You've been staring at that book for twenty minutes."

The young woman averted her gaze to the book in her hand. She was organizing the last few books she had to put away in piles on the reception table when her thoughts captured her.

"Just thinking about my date."

"And you didn't think of coming to your best counselor for advice? You better start talking before I hide all your gummy bears."

"It's nothing special" Agatha gave up, leaving the book on the front desk, still rocking her body. "Remember the guy that came yesterday, the one we've never seen before? He asked me on a date. He's hot but there's something about him that irks me."

"So, you're telling me that something about the guy bothers you but you're still going on the date. Why? Because he's hot? Girl I thought you knew better."

"I don't know if it's a bad thing, maybe I just found him weird cause I don't know him. I don't want to judge him without giving him a chance, he could be amazing." Agatha avoided the talk about what happened the previous night, the real reason why she accepted the offer.

"Want me to use my powers to find info about him, It'll take less than a minute to find him on the internet."

"No, I don't want you to hack the whole internet to stalk him. Isn't that illegal?"

"Don't be boring, I have to use my power for something. What else should I use it for? To play hero? Nah, I'll pass,"  Demir dismissed her friend's accusation. "Be careful, in times like this you shouldn't play with strangers."

A pang of pain shocked Agatha at the mention of danger. More than anyone she knew what could be the consequences of being careless, she already suffered them and didn't think she could walk out victorious a second time. Unconsciously, she began to wave her hands under the reception desk.

"I'll take care of the rest, you can go home," said Demir, taking the book. "Take some rest before your date."

"No, I'm good. I can survive for another hour."

"Hey, whatever stupid excuse you're thinking about doesn't matter. I know you hate to take some time off, but that doesn't make you less responsible. Ms. White knows you're a great worker and everyone has to take some days off sometimes."

"But it's not the same, I'm not sick. If I take a day off every time I'm sensory overload I'll lose a lot of time. Ms. White is nice enough to offer me a job, I can't mess this chance."

Memories of her previous job interviews polluted her mind. They always started great until her autism entered the conversation. Being autistic seemed to be synonymous with incapable for employers. No matter how qualified she showed herself to be, all the others saw was a threat to the productivity of the business. So, after Ms. White gave her the job she felt the need to overcompensate to show her that she had made the right decision.

"You're not ruining anything," insisted Demir. "Anyone can see how good you're at this job, your love of books makes you the right person to help customers, everyone loves your recommendations and I don't think anyone else has taken the trouble to keep the sections as organized as you have. It's only an hour, I can take care of it and there aren't so many people. Get out before I kick you out."

"But I owe you a favor."

The young woman didn't have any other option than to listen to her friend. She collected her belongings and left the library. Once she got home, she hid in her room to listen to her favorite music. Demir and Lorcan were right. She needed to take some time off.

Hours later Agatha had to face a new dilemma: what should she wear to the date? 

Winter was getting over, soon the flowers would start to flourish and the warm days were more usual than the cold ones.  A floral dress or a black shirt and denim shorts were the options, the first one looked cute but the second one was comfortable.

In the end, she reasoned that it was best to choose comfort, as usual, and be practical, after all, she didn't know where they were going. Making a last-minute adjustment, Agatha added a denim jacket that looked great with the shorts.

The sound of the bell ringing announced Ellis' arrival. Her hands were shaking as she opened the door, and a long breath escaped her mouth once she saw him.

The young man approached Agatha with a bouquet of red roses. The black shirt and pants he was wearing made it seem like darkness surrounded him and it suited him. A sexy dark lord, that's how Agatha would describe him.

"Didn't know what flowers you like so I brought my favorite," Ellis explained offering the bouquet.

"They're beautiful. Thanks, I'll put them in water and then we can go."

In a matter of seconds, she finished the last touches and they jumped onto their date.

Ellis drove his black pickup truck to a cozy coffee shop situated in the center of the village. Agatha recognized the place; she went there two or three times with Demir. Decorated with colorful flowers, some of them painted on the yellow walls, and provided with large windows, the place looked perfect to welcome spring.

They chose a table next to the door, from that spot it was possible to see the street through the window. Not much time passed before the waiter brought their orders: one black coffee for Ellis, one strawberry shake for Agatha, and a carrot cake to share.

"So, are you going to ask me something or should I describe myself?" Agatha asked, tired of Ellis' silence.

"Sorry, I got distracted by the beautiful view. How long have you been living in Umbra?"

"Since I was born, I have never left this place. It isn't like I would like to live in another city but a vacation outside the village would be good. I want something new but sticking to my routines feels safer. What about you? I've never seen you before, it's weird, you know, considering everyone here seems to know each other."

"I've been around here for fourteen years, I live in the countryside. I didn't like to come to the village, I had plenty of work on the farm and I didn't have a reason to travel here every day, now I do have one."

There they were again, the unknown reactions demanding a space inside Agatha's body. As the conversation progressed new feelings were added. It started with the usual nervousness before a date, followed by the characteristic fluttery sensation in her stomach, completed by a touch of giggling that followed after some of Ellis' words.

Although the date was going great, Agatha couldn't get away from her doubts, one in particular. Should she have told him about her autism?

Since receiving her diagnosis four months ago, she has found a place to belong and all those details that made her feel like a weird girl have made sense. Although a part of her insecurities remained in her soul, she chose to feed her new founded courage and speak up.

"Sometimes I ask myself if my life is boring, tasteless. If I die today, would I be able to say that I enjoyed my life? Anyways I feel safer sticking to what I know, it comes with being autistic." Confessed Agatha, before she ate the last piece of the cake. Then she held her breath, the rest of the date depended on his reaction.

"You have autism? You don't look like it." Ellis's voice didn't carry disgust, just a bit of curiosity.

She faked a smile. The same ignorant comment always came up. She doesn't look like autistic, the words they use to dismiss her diagnosis.

"I prefer to say that I'm autistic," she corrected him. "Autism is not a disease one can have, it is part of who I am. Also, autism is a spectrum, there's no thing like looking autistic, we came in a lot of color. But I understand what you meant, you're trying to say that I look what people consider normal, that's because I'm used to mask, I act like most people to camouflage myself. I do it unconsciously, I'm trying to stop masking but it's hard to let go of a habit."

"I'll remember that," said Ellis. "I have an idea. Wanna have some fun?"

He stood up from his seat and offered a hand to his date.

Agatha thought about it for a second, her mind always set on the familiar things. A little voice that used to be quiet but was starting to speak up, reminded her how much she regretted everything she didn't do when she faced death. An internal conflict she resolved when she took Ellis' hand.

He drove in a direction Agatha hadn't seen before. Ellis was full of new things, she started to consider that the universe heard her prayers and sent him to fulfill her desires.

He stopped the truck next to a farm. A small, brown house and a red barn looked lonely in the middle of the prairie. The sound of birds singing was the only thing the girl could hear. The most isolated, and yet, most beautiful scenery she has ever seen.

"Wait here, I'll be right back," announced Ellis before he ran through the field.

Without a chance to retort, to ask to not be left alone, the librarian could only wait. The vast meadow no longer seemed like a paradise, it had become a nightmare, a place where her vulnerability came to light.

Minutes later the roar of a motor got Agatha's attention. From the same direction he disappeared, Ellis returned driving a quad bike. In a quick movement, he hopped off the vehicle.

"Would you accompany me on a ride?" He asked with a helmet in his hand. "Let me put your helmet on."

Agatha allowed him to get closer, their bodies only centimeters away from each other. Her heartbeat raced in a matter of seconds, she couldn't  focus on the handsome face in front of her, the proximity between their bodies made her anxious. With extreme softness, Ellis put the helmet on Agatha's head, he took his time to fasten it, he seemed to wish that they could stay in that position a little bit longer.

They pulled apart after what felt like an eternity. Agatha got on the quad bike first, with Ellis' assistance. The young man followed after her, sitting in the front.

"Wrap your arms around me tight. We wouldn't want you to fall." 

Agatha debated whether to do it or not, the physical contact made her nervous but it was reasonable to hold on to him to be safe, after some minutes she did as he asked her, putting all of her strength in that embrace. Ellis started the engine and soon they were driving through the dirt road. The feeling of the wind blowing her face and the tingling sensation running around her body made Agatha feel alive for the first time in months.

"Here we are," Ellis spoke up, confusing the girl.

The quad bike wasn't the surprise? Was there something else? She moved her head to the side to see what was in front of them.

The road they were on continued into a chain of hills, high enough to scare the young woman. Ellis felt her hold tighten and took one of her hands in his to calm her.

"Do you trust me?"

"I don't know," whispered Agatha, still unsure about the idea.

At a faster speed than before Ellis drove the quad bike up the first hill. The force almost made her fall and when she could breathe again they were already at the top of the hill.

A scream came out of Agatha's mouth the moment they started the descent, the sound was followed by Ellis' laugh. No worries about demons, no anxiety, no stress about her work bothered her as they went down. Vulnerability trapped her as she fell without being the one taking the wheel, all she could do until the end of the trip was to let go.

After the second hill was left behind them, Agatha found the courage to free one of her arms from the embrace and stretch it to her side, sensing the wind. It was without a doubt the funniest moment she experienced for a while, the perfect escape from her dull life.

"That was crazy!" she screamed filled with excitement once they got back to the farm.

"Was it fun enough?"

"More than enough, I want to do it again"

"Maybe next time," Ellis suggested, surprised by Agatha's energy. "It's getting late, I don't think you'll want to stay outside at night again."

What happened next was secondary for the young woman, in comparison with the drive in the quad bike, the travel home was forgettable. All she remembered was that he took her home and before they parted, Ellis only gave her a goodbye hug. He suggested they go on a second date, and she couldn't wait for the moment to come.

They finally went to their first day. What do you do think?
Remember that you're amazing. Have a wonderful day ❤️