Chapter Fourteen | Danger Zone

                Before I could continue to try to think of more bullshit to feed myself and rationalize how fucking anxiety driven I am right now due to the unknown of what's happening on the other side of the pack house, my legs begin to move. I didn't even register how fast I was running until I accidentally bumped shoulders with this girl and heard her collapse onto the floor with the loudest and hardest thump I'd ever heard.

Crossing my fingers and hoping that I didn't break the bones in her butt or back; I wasn't sure how she fell since I didn't turn around to check or make sure. Sure, it was an asshole move but I was slowly becoming more and more of an asshole as days passed so I might as well get used to it. Or change. Yeah, I think it'd be better to change. At least when it came to Xander. I didn't want to be an asshole to him. Everyone else, I cared less about.

Everyone learned soon enough to make way for me as I made no move to politely excuse myself and would violently bump into you if you stood in my way without care. My focus was on Xander so the looks on the people I passed by didn't faze me. Even if I wasn't focused on Xander right now, it wouldn't have fazed me.

The moment I began to smell the rich intoxicating smell of sandalwood and amber, my heart began to flutter. His scent drifting up my nose urged me to run faster and so I did without thinking, without considering anything, and without hesitation. I barge into the large open concept living room that was on the Alphas side of the mansion breathlessly.

My legs slow down to a stop the moment my eyes catch Xanders darkened one's that are directed at his even angrier father who's eyes are just as black. Finnick is no where to be seen, but I see a feeble and helpless Eros sitting in the corner, watching everything unfold with his body shaking violently and his glasses sitting lopsidedly on his pale face.

This was a danger zone.

Any sane wolf would've turned around and ran away but I was not a sane wolf. Clearly since, instead of actually making use of my brain and leaving, my feet were actually moving closer to two Alpha wolves who were in a fragile state. Anything could trigger them to attack each other at any moment regardless of the fact that they shared blood relation. I doubt that they would end up fighting until someone died — I recoil just thinking about it but my feet force me to move forward and so I did — but they would fight and blood would be shed.

I clench my fist at my side as my canines reflexively begin to extend itself. Like hell will there be any of Xanders blood splattered on the floor. Calming myself down as I draw in a breath, I grow closer and watch intently as Xanders nose twitches. I can tell that he's now highly aware that I'm here as I allow my pheromones to tickle his nose and invade his senses completely.

The Alpha standoff between Xander and his father is broken as Xander head snaps around to look at me with those dangerously dark eyes of his that are void of emotion. The look makes chills run down my spin, my right leg shifting back as inner turmoil runs rampant in my head. Too fucking late to be unsure about this, Jaylin.

Swallowing, I take more steps forward slowly and cautiously. My heart beat is so loud that it feels like my ears would burst any minute now, the impending headache bubbling in my head but remaining tame for the moment. Then I reach him. I finally reach him and I started to feel like my heart was going to explode. Gazing up at him with my eyes transfixed on his face like I was under some kind of spell, I reach out to him.

My hands are just slightly trembling — no, they are profusely trembling right now. But I ignore it, I ignore every uncertain emotion brewing within me and I grab a hold of his upper arm softly. My movements are unsure at first but watching his dark eyes blink down at me as he looks to be at war within himself, I become more certain. Firmly holding his arm, I begin to pull him closer to me and I watch him take tentative steps towards me.

My stomach is a mess, my heart an erratic mess inside my chest, and my breathing was almost nonexistent at this point but there was no time for me to really think even though I had zero idea what I was doing right now. I didn't know what I was fucking doing, I was just moving and going with whatever I thought felt right. And what felt right was wrapping my arms around him in a tight hug as I embraced him.

My arms were awkwardly wrapped around his torso so the a blush blooming onto my cheeks. I wasn't used to doing shit like this. Even when we were simply best friends and before all of this mate stuff came about, we never really hugged. We wrapped arms around each other's shoulders and did normal heterosexual bro shit but we never embraced each other like this ever so this was beyond weird.

I didn't even know if this was actually doing anything since his hands remained placed at his side so what the fuck am I actually doing right now? Making a fool out of myself? Yes, that's exactly what I'm doing right now and it made me want to disappear and melt into the ground into a fucking puddle.

Growing more embarrassed as time passed, I began to slowly retreat but strong and firm arms wrapping firmly around my waist prevent me from doing so and I freeze. His muscled arms that were hard, strong, and toned keep me close to him tightly like he was afraid I'd shove him off of me. Usually, I would but right now...right now, I'd allow it happen.

Just this once.

It felt like he needed me right now and that's what me fold like a damn lawn chair as I allowed my arms to wrap around his neck. I silently cursed at the fact that I had to stand on my toes a bit in order to do so but I willed myself to bury down my pride for just a few moments. He buried his face into the crook of my neck, his angled nose softly running down my neck and skimming down my collarbone.

I released a breath as I tried to contain the shiver that ran down my spine but it was useless. When it came to him, it was nearly impossible to hold back the emotions and feelings that ran through me and that's what frustrated me to no end. He breathed in my scent deeply like he was savoring me and taking me in fully. I didn't know how to react to it at all but I did know that my toes were getting tired and I started to feel like I was sick. Except it wasn't actually sickness that I was feeling, it was something else that I didn't want to recognize.

"Jaylin." he whispered softly, his breath tickling my neck making me feel that all too familiar feeling of pure, undiluted want.

That scared the shit out of me.

"Xander..." I trail off, unsure of what to say.

It was even harder for me to concentrate and try to come up with shit to say when his breath, his lips, and the tip of his nose were gingerly and softly brushing against the most vulnerable spots on my neck in hypnotic faint strokes that made me feel like I was going absolutely insane. I've never once in my life felt like this before. The feeling that I was being sucked in and no matter how hard I tried to fight against the feeling, it was like I was fighting a losing battle but giving up wasn't in my vocabulary so it was like I was relentlessly throwing punches at a wall. Like a fucking clown. Give me the red and blue markers already.

"I'm sorry." I splutter without being able to control it. It came out like I had just thrown up except it wasn't food that I threw up, it was my pride...and words.

Xander tried to pull away so he could look at my face but I didn't want him to see me so I tightened my arms around his neck and kept him still. Respecting my wishes while also being amused — I could tell from his silent chuckle and the way his shoulders moved to further try and stifle his laugh — he remained still for me. I was both grateful and annoyed that he obliged so easily but took entertainment in the fact that I was most definitely embarrassed right now.

"I...I shouldn't have said that shit. Actually, I shouldn't have said a lot of the shit that I've been saying to you. It was fucked up." I mumbled. I found myself burying my face into his shoulder without realizing it as I held him closer as if I was silently conveying just how I was that I was such a prick. "You can hate me, I'd understand —"

"I could never hate you, Jay." He firmly cut me off like he didn't want to hear those words come out of my mouth and that silenced me immediately. "It's not possible for me to ever hate you even when you said all that shit....and now I feel like I'm fucking Lucy right now."

I laughed as my body rumbled from how funny I thought it was, him comparing himself to a lap dog like Lucy. He'd actually have to love me in order for him to be anything like Lucy...

I felt myself drop to my feet as my toes began to grow weak and I was laughing too much to maintain my previous position. His hands shifted from around my waist to remain on my hips, something that made me feel like I was a girl. I scrunched up my face but thinking about what he said made me shake my head as I lightly chuckled once more.

"I missed seeing that smile so fucking much, you have no idea." He mused softly.

My head whips up to look at him and I regretted it. Oh how I wish I wasn't able to see the look that was on his face right now. Maybe if I had kept my head down and didn't see the look that was on his face right now, I would have been able to main my sanity. I would have been able to prevent the storm that's brewing within the pits of my stomach. And just maybe, I would've been able to avoid the way my wolf instincts were begging me to kis— I shake my head, no.

But fuck, Xander. He looked so awestruck. He was gazing down at me like I was something he treasured, like I was something he wanted so bad. It was that longing look in his eyes that scared the hell out of me and made me stumble back. I broke away from him and created a necessary distance between the two of us.

That's just the mate bond in him thats talking right now. That's all it is. Even if he didn't realize it, I did. Aside from that, the last thing that I want to do is take the lead role as a 'girl' beside him.

I tried to ignore the hurt look on his face and the look in his eyes that conveyed just how much he wanted to bring me close to him again. That can't happen.

"I want us to be us again, Jay." Xander admits with those gentle brown eyes of his.

Damnit.

"Me too." I admit quietly.

A hopeful look overtakes his expression as he takes a step closer to me. I shake my head and take a step back.

"But! I have created two rules. Just two." I said quickly, raising my hand to show two fingers to emphasize my words and get them through that stubborn head of his.

Xander arches an eyebrow in amusement, like he thought it was bullshit.

Pursing my lips, I narrow my eyes at him. "Okay, never mind. We can go back to square one."

I make a move to turn around and leave, but as I expected, I hear his, 'wait,' and stop. Something I anticipated because I knew Xander King. Satisfied, I turn back around and look at an exasperated Xander. The look on his face makes me want to laugh but I keep it in. Better to not fan the flames.

"What're your two rules, master Jaylin?" He drawls out sarcastically.

Unfazed by his sarcastic tone —  thanks, Kaylee — I smile.

"First one is: do not come close to me. I'm talking six feet social distancing." I'm able to get my words out without being interrupted, the surprise of the year.

He releases a breath, like he's trying to maintain his cool. Which, in my opinion, he's doing an amazing job at. Well, if you don't count his fist clenched at his side with his veins popping out to say hello and trickling down his bare arm. And if you overlooked him trying to keep his canines from baring. If you ignore that, totally doing amazing.

If you wanted to anger an Alpha, there were so many ways to do it, especially when it came to their mate. The first way is to tell an Alpha that they cannot come near their mate. 

"What's the second one?" He chewed out.

"The second one is to never and I mean never touch me."

I close my eyes. Cue the growl...

When the growl doesn't come, I peek one eye open and see a placid Xander staring right at me. I reopen both of my eyes confused as hell. I anticipated a reaction so when I didn't get one, I started to become more alert but Xander was as cool as a breeze. In fact, he smiled. He fucking smiled at me.

"Deal." He said.

I blinked suspiciously.

"Deal?" I repeated questioningly.

He nodded, his eyes shining as he fully enjoyed the way I squirmed in my spot like the evil toad he is. "I know your two rules now. I got it."

Knowing Xander King, he got it alright. But what he got was something else and not the two rules I just gave him.

What he got was newfound realization. What that realization was? I have no clue. Stomach dropping and heart beating much faster, I shifted my weight from my right leg to my left as uncertainty and fear pooled into my stomach.

Why do I feel like I just dug my grave?

Note: unedited.