21 | psychosis

(n) a very serious mental illness that makes you behave strangely or believe things that are not true

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Dear diary,

Life is ... interesting. I never thought my life would change in a drastic way but it has. Its scarier than I ever thought. It has been officially two months with Mr. J but I feel like time is flying fast since the day I have met him. There is a smile on my face just thinking about him already.

I have been trying to find out for the past week if he reciprocates my feelings, and I found out that he cares for me. In his own unique way but it still makes me happy nonetheless. I think that it is still hard for him to come out of the wall he has built around himself. He doesn't want to come out of it, and he doesn't want anybody breaking down the hard built wall.

And each day, the more and more he talks, the more he makes me laugh, I fall for him a little more. I have a box, a huge box filled with his presents and everytime I see it, I can't help but giggle like a high school girl.

But, something is bothering me right now. When I came home, I automatically went to the sacred pillow which contains my letters and he has not send me anything today. I searched the whole house trying to see if he had placed it somewhere else but to no avail.

Have I done something wrong? Have I made him ang---

Someone knocked my front door. My pen stopped mid-air and I placed down the pen, yelling a 'coming', I frown as I stand up and walk towards the door. Who would come here to see me? It must be some lost person.

Never have I ever had anyone knock on my front door except a few days ago, when Tom brought me out.

Wait.

Is it Tom?

What is he doing here?

Why would he come here without warning?

I stood in front of my closed door, and shuffled my feet, I looked through the peek hole to see nothing. Nobody was outside.

But, I was sure I heard a knock.

I opened the door, and looked around. No one was standing on the corridor.

When I turned around to close the door, something caught my eye and I looked down.

There was a neatly wrapped present at my doormat.

A smile made its way on my face and I took the present, closing the door and walking in.

I felt happiness bubble inside of me and placed the present on the kitchen table gently, I read the green card, tagged to it.

My beloved Harley,

This absurd world makes me laugh and smile. But, you make my heart smile.

P.S: Try not to be too alarmed.

Love,
Mr. J

Try not to be too alarmed? Whag does he mean by that?

I quickly removed the wrapper and my heart pounded in my chest as I opened the box.

I froze.

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"How could you do that to me?" I said, bursting through, once the glass door opens. He was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, and he turned his head to the side to look at me.

I stood right in front of his bed, and he looked at me, his hands tucked behind at the back of his head, as he gave me a wide malicious grin.

"I never did anything to you." He said.

"A dead heart?" I asked, placing my hands on my hips. "Its the one present I didn't keep."

I blurted out before I could stop myself.

"Did you hear that sound?" He asked, moving his hand towards his ear. "The sound of my poor heart breaking?" He said, gave me a wink and a wide grin.

I rolled my eyes, but I still couldn't control the blush that's making its way onto my face and the fireworks of happiness exploding inside of me.

"There is a place for you in hell." I muttered, glaring at him.

His eyes shined brightly before he gave me one of his shivering cold laugh, squeezing his eyes shut, laughing hard, before opening them and gave me a look.

"Yeah. You are right." He paused.

"Its called a ... throne."

I try not to show my shock at his answer and fold my arms across my chest.

He gestured for me to sit down on the bed and I refused, shaking my head. He gave me a pout and I smiled, still shaking my head no.

"Pretty please?" He asked and I pretended to think about it and then made myself comfortable on the edge of his bed, beside his chest.

"Why did you send me that?" I asked, looking down at him.

He was still lied down, his hands behind his head, an unreadable emotion flashed through his eyes for a second, before he abruptly got up, and sat in an upright position.

My heart fluttered.

His face was inches away from mine. I could feel his breath, and shivers went down my spine. I bit my lip and tried to calm myself down but I felt like the temperature in the room had become hot in a matter of seconds.

"You still haven't figured it out." He said, a smug smile made its way onto his face, as his icy blue eyes, stared at me.

"Figure out what?" I asked, breathless and trying to control the emotions exploding inside of me.

"Its the heart of the ... person who attacked you the other night." He said and laughed, his hand reached my bruised-now-healing hand and he stroked.

Unconsciously, I leant forward, looking down at my hand being stroked by his pale rough hand and I loved the feeling of it.

My forehead met something warm and my eyes immediately went up to him staring at me already, his forehead resting on mine.

His eyes flickered to my lips and then back to my eyes and mine did the same.

His hand left my hand, and he stroked my cheek, pushing a strand of hair behind my ear and his fingers played with the my glasses and he slowly pulled them off.

"Much better." He said, looking at me without the glasses.

As he leant foreword my pulse raced. A small lock of blonde hair tumbled in front of my face again, resting just in front of my cheek, but with one swift slide of his thumb, it was brushed out of the way. Looking into his eyes I saw deep pools of icy blue that displayed his soul.

His lips alight on my cheek like a dew freckled petal caught in a breeze, so soft and with the smallest hint of coolness.

Time stopped. My heart came to a halt. My breath caught in my throat.

A hot blazing fire pulsed through me. A small grin crept onto my face and my cheeks painted themselves rose red. He pulled away silently, but our eyes locked, having a private conversation of their own.

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*hides behind Killercroc*

HE KISSED HER CHEEK!
Come on, you cant expect them to do the chimi changa just like that.

It needs time.

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