I am Jay, a wannabe writer,  am working on my first novel and, I am planning on changing my name.

Yesterday, my good wife walked in with a cup of coffee even as I was, instead of writing, swearing at the computer.

"What are you up to? Whom are you cursing?"

"Well! Look at the text. It's bloody jagged and I cant work on a damned manuscript that doesn't bloody wrap evenly."

"Control, Jay," My wife said emphatically. 

Control? I am only a little upset with the formatting of my manuscript. It isn't as though I am on a vase-breaking spree, I was puzzled. 

"Are you serious?" I scowled. "Why do I need to control myself?"

My wife rolled her eyes before staring at me blankly. "Will you look at your keyboard?" she said.

"OK. And?"

"Now," she said, "Control and J."

"Ah!" I said in a moment of realisation. "That Control..." 

"And that J," my wife completed the sentence for me, snob-bobbed her head, snatched the cup from me and walked away before I could plead with her to let me finish my coffee.

I will be changing my name shortly, for I can't change the way the keyboard works.