Nandini walked at a slow pace towards her house, pausing frequently to apparently admire the petite flowers growing by the side of the path. She needed every extra moment to compose herself..

Meanwhile, inside Vrindavan, Rajeshwari was gaping in astonishment at the small pile of woollen clothes that Prakash had placed by her side.

"You can pick anything you like from this bunch, Di," Prakash offered generously with a flair of a salesman.

"Nandini made all of this?" Rajeshwari asked in awe.

"Yes," Sarojini said with a smile of quiet pride.

"Di went on a crazy manufacturing spree about four years ago," Prakash snorted. "She was very slow at the start, but then she began knitting things so fast that I thought she had decided to give up her studies and sell woollen clothes for a living."

Sarojini glanced censoriously at her son. "But she was very good at it. The sweaters we wear have been knitted by her," she beamed at Rajeshwari. "There were many other items too. Nandini gave some to our neighbours and some to her best friends."

"That's wonderful," Rajeshwari said sincerely.

On hearing the sound of anklets, everyone looked towards the door.

Rajeshwari's face brightened as Nandini walked into the house. While she had enjoyed being pampered by everyone after she had finally climbed out of bed, she'd been looking forward to seeing Nandini.

Sarojini's expression turned stern as she looked at her daughter. She turned to Rajeshwari and gently said, "Rajeshwari, I'm going upstairs now. If you need anything, don't hesitate to call me, okay?" she adjoined affectionately.

"Okay, Mrs Bharadwaj," Rajeshwari smiled at her.

Concealing her irritation at her mother, Nandini walked into the house with a cheery greeting. She noted the drawn look on Rajeshwari's features, and smiled warmly at her. Then she saw the knitted pieces next to Rajeshwari, and a sharp anguish stabbed through her.

Each piece was a reminder of an agonising time...when she'd sought refuge in anything that could have take her mind off her pain. And now, after a gap of over two years, she was back in that same space...

"What's going on here?" Nandini asked lightly. "Prakash, why did you bring all this down."

"Raji Di said she's feeling slightly cold. Maa checked her temperature. She doesn't have a fever. But I thought she could use some of these ugly things that you'd made."

"They're not ugly, they're very pretty," Rajeshwari protested, lifting a cream-coloured cap with an attractive wavy pattern in pink along the edges.

"Thank you, Rajeshwari," Nandini said graciously, "but one of these is soon going to be used for a very ugly purpose," she added while giving her brother a pleasant smile.

"What exactly is your threat, Di? You're going to make me wear it and go outside?" Prakash smirked.

Sitting down on the sofa, Nandini picked up a long green muffler and began coiling it around her left hand in a decidedly threatening style. "No, Pikku. I have a much more interesting fate in mind for you," she said kindly.

Prakash studied her suspiciously, then looked at Rajeshwari. "Raji Di, you're a witness. If anything happens to me, tell the police it was her," he said, pointing accusingly at his older sister.

Nandini looked at Rajeshwari with wide-eyed innocence. "Rajeshwari, look at me. Would anyone believe I'm capable of cold-blooded murder?"

Rajeshwari laughed. "No one would believe that you could hurt a fly."

"They would only need to spend some days with her to understand what she's capable of," Prakash said sourly.

Nandini chuckled, "He's right about that."

"He's not," Rajeshwari objected with a laugh.

"You girls always gang up," Prakash grumbled. "It's not fair."

"And boys don't ever do that?" Nandini asked sceptically, rolling her eyes.

Prakash raised his head conceitedly. "Men fight their battles alone," he said loftily, and having decided that it was an excellent exit line, he walked to the stairway with an admirable swagger, and sauntered up the steps.

The two females in the living room exchanged glances, and both laughed.

*********************

Sankatmochan checked the rooms on the ground floor before moving to the stairway, his mind churning heatedly as he ascended the steps. But Prithvi wasn't there on the first floor either. 

Sankatmochan walked to the steps leading to the terrace and called out his friend's name twice, but didn't get any response.

On his way back, he paused outside one of the rooms, but didn't go inside. For him, it wasn't only Prithvi's room. It was Nandini's too.

Guilt pinched his conscience. He had not spoken to Nandini since yesterday, and he'd also not questioned Prithvi about his decision to cook a meal for the Bharadwaj family when Nandini was fasting. In trying to be loyal to Prithvi, he had been disloyal to Nandini, Sankatmochan castigated himself, and then he prayed for the advent of a day when being loyal to one would once again automatically mean being loyal to the other... 

Yesterday, he had initially been in a happy, comfortable bubble, praying and imagining that beautiful moments were unfolding somewhere in the background. But his hopes had begun dwindling once he'd perceived Prithvi's complete lack of interest in Nandini. Yesterday evening, he had even tried to discern if there was any anger behind Prithvi's decision to host a dinner that excluded Nandini. But he had only seen a plain indifference.

Then again, Prithvi had changed over the years, Sankatmochan ruminated. His friend had become astonishingly calm and even-tempered, and he was also gentler and more open towards everyone.

Sankatmochan began to walk to the stairs in a meditative mood, his thoughts jumping from one subject to the other.

So far, all the changes he'd witnessed in his friend appeared to be for the better. Yet, he couldn't get rid of a feeling that something vital was missing, Sankatmochan thought worriedly. The imagery that was haunting him was that of a young lion that had deliberately bound itself in thick, heavy chains and withdrawn to the dark, cold depths of a cave to live out the rest of its existence.

Also, could love be discarded like a bad habit? Especially in this case, when it had once been – and for Nandini, still was - so powerful and intense...

Sankatmochan entered his room and sat down on the bed. He had to discern Prithvi's true feelings somehow. And he had to do it by sticking to the truth, because lying to Prithvi was pointless.

Maybe he could use the conversation he'd overheard in the temple, Sankatmochan pondered with a sudden thrill. The subject was one that Prithvi would not be able to tolerate if he had the tiniest feelings left in his heart...

Nandini's marriage.

And he wouldn't need to fib about the issue, since it had indeed become a major problem for the Bharadwaj family, Sankatmochan reasoned with increasing excitement.

One tiny sign was all he needed, Sankatmochan thought optimistically. Just one tiny sign...

************************

Rajeshwari looked at the woollen items and inquisitively asked, "How did you learn to knit these things, Nandini?"

"My friend's mother taught me," Nandini said with a casualness that belied the constriction in her chest. "I used to knit when I was...bored. But I haven't made anything for a very long time." Then she caringly asked, "How is your headache now? Are you feeling better?"

She didn't ask about the chill that Rajeshwari was feeling. She knew through experience and instinct that it wasn't about the temperature. This was a different kind of cold that gripped your insides and couldn't be lessened with any amount of warm clothing.

"Headache? Oh – yes, it has gone," Rajeshwari said quickly, flustered.

"Good," Nandini smiled. "Did you eat something?"

"Mrs. Bharadwaj made me eat such a heavy breakfast that I don't think I'll be able to have lunch," Rajeshwari said ruefully. Then she looked at Nandini's feet and smiled. "I didn't tell you in the morning, but your anklets sound very sweet."

"Thank you," Nandini smiled.

"You'd gone for a walk?" Rajeshwari enquired.

"Yes...hey, how about I take you to the main market in town this evening, and we could just walk around or maybe do some shopping?" Nandini asked brightly.

"The market?" Rajeshwari said unsurely. "But won't it be crowded? And dirty?"

"It will be both," Nandini chuckled. Then lowering her voice to almost a whisper so she wouldn't be overheard by anyone else, she impishly said, "But you're a princess. And a princess always searches for adventures."

Rajeshwari smiled faintly. "Haven't you read fairy tales? Princes go on adventures. Princesses sit in their castles and weave or sleep or just stand at the window and wait for their princes to rescue them."

Placing her hands on her hips, Nandini tetchily said, "Those fairy tales were concocted either by male chauvinist pigs or by women who were miserable themselves and did not want other women to have a better life than them."

The commanding posture and the scowl that looked adorable rather than scary made Rajeshwari giggle.

For the next three-quarters of an hour, she laughed often. First, Nandini narrated her funny experiences in the market place, and then wittily explained to her the whole incredible process of 'bargaining', which she found fascinating. And then, as they watched television, Nandini perkily described the ludicrous plots of movies she had seen in the last few years. Prakash and other family members joined their chat at some points and then left, their warm presences flowing in and out of the conversations with an ease that was a natural part of the house's rhythm.

As she laughed and chatted, Rajeshwari felt an intense gratitude for being in their midst. Earlier in the morning, she had been wallowing in the depths of misery. But the unguarded affection shown by Prithvi, Sarojini, Bhoothnath and Prakash had helped her feel better, and post Nandini's arrival, she had almost forgotten her sorrow.

Her phone rang at one point, making her halt in the middle of describing a show she had watched recently on her laptop.

Nandini watched with an intense compassion as the other girl frantically pushed aside the knitted pieces to look for her phone, and then she witnessed hope die on Rajeshwari's face on perceiving the name on the screen. Then Nandini looked towards the doors with a sweeping, acute relief.

Rajeshwari cut the call, and looked at Nandini with an unfocussed gaze. "It was Grishma. She'd called me yesterday too. I haven't told her about Prithvi being here. I forgot to ask him if it would be okay to tell her."

Nandini heard the last two lines but she didn't let them sink into her mind. They remained suspended a step beyond the boundaries of her understanding, restrained there by the sheer strength of concentrated willpower. She did not want to know who Grishma was...or why Prithvi's whereabouts were relevant to her, Nandini thought numbly. Emotionally, she was feeling as fragile as a house of cards at the moment. If she permitted herself to think about the possibility of there being anyone else in his life...even for a second, she would collapse into a scattered heap...

Mistaking the blankness on Nandini's face for a simple confusion, Rajeshwari apologetically said, "Oh you don't know Grishma, do you? She's a good friend of Prithvi's, and mine too. She's very sweet and kind. I like talking to her, but right now...I -"

Rajeshwari paused as the phone began ringing again. "It's Prithvi," she smiled, cheering up. "That's a coincidence.  I sometimes think they are made for each other," she murmured fondly before answering the call.

****************************

"Hey Rai, I'll be calling up Sumer Baba in a short while," Prithvi said casually as he strolled towards Ayodhya. "Just thought of telling you...he doesn't need to know that you're here. No one needs to know about it," he said gently.

Rajeshwari felt surprised for a moment that he hadn't told Sumer Singh yet, but the thought of questioning her brother did not arise. Prithvi had reasons for whatever he did, and this was one more instance that proved it. He was giving her a chance to protect herself from unnecessary questions and looks, Rajeshwari thought, feeling close to tears. But she was going to use this chance to do the opposite. To ruffle some feathers and to make it clear that she had understood who was worthy of her affection, and who wasn't...

Rajeshwari looked towards Nandini to request permission to speak in the guest room. But the space beside her was empty. Nandini had left the room to give her privacy. No one else was around, so she could speak freely.

Nevertheless, she ensured her voice was low as she determinedly said, "You don't have to lie about anything, Prithvi. You can tell Sumer Singh that I became friends with Nandini when I met her accidentally in another town, and that I invited her to Nikumbh and she stayed for a day. And I came to Shamli because I wanted to meet her again."

Slowing down, Prithvi cautiously said, "I'm glad you feel that way, but she could land in trouble if that story reaches her family."

"Oh, you're right, I hadn't thought about that," Rajeshwari said, disappointed.

"But if you're okay with it, I could tell Baba the same story that the Bharadwaj family knows," Prithvi said nonchalantly. "You were passing by Shamli and you visited their home because you'd heard good things about them, and then you decided to stay with them for a few days. And my visit at the same time was just a coincidence."

Rajeshwari's shoulders straightened again. "Yes. You can tell them that. And Sumer Singh can share it with everyone. I'm not ashamed or afraid. I'm happy to be staying with this family. They are the nicest, sweetest people I have met in my life."

"Okay, will do. I'll see you at lunch, Rai," Prithvi murmured as he walked into the house.

Sankatmochan's slippers were placed near the door, and a droning noise was coming out of the room near the kitchen. The snores of his childhood friend who was desperately waiting for an opportunity to conduct an archaeological survey of his feelings...

Prithvi removed his shoes absentmindedly and walked to the table. He pulled up a chair and sat down, lounging against the backrest.

He had to call Sumer Singh now. He'd delayed it enough.

He had made the same decision last evening. And then he'd spent his time cooking, which was the fourth on the list of things that helped him calm down during the times when rage drummed in his veins and demanded an outlet. He'd needed the diversion, and so he had lied blatantly to the innocent family next door about needing to leave today morning. And it had still been difficult to convince the sweet, motherly Sarojini Bharadwaj to let him cook one single meal for her family...

And ultimately, the cooking had not helped him yesterday, Prithvi conceded to himself grudgingly for the first time since last night. In fact, the sight of the food he'd prepared had made him feel nauseated during dinner. It was probably because he'd felt guilty about the tangible discomfort on Sarojini Bharadwaj's face during the meal. A mother who was unable to enjoy a meal because her daughter had not eaten all day...

Prithvi closed his eyes.

He had not lost the scrap of equanimity he'd found last evening. Not yet.

But it was still merely a tiny fragment...and Shamli's earth would not let it grow...

*************************

"Nandini, can I talk to you?"

With a slight start, Nandini looked towards the kitchen's entrance, where Rajeshwari was standing with a wan face and an overall hopeless air.

Nandini put down the glass of water that she'd been holding for minutes. "Of course. But why do you look so upset?" she asked concernedly, walking to Rajeshwari. "Did Prithvi say something?"

Rajeshwari shook her head distractedly. "He would never say anything that could upset me. He's so caring...he thinks of everyone," she said wretchedly. "But I didn't think of him while making plans to come to Shamli to meet...how will I face Prithvi if he finds out..." she said with a torn expression. "Nandini, I...I have to talk to you about the whole thing or my head will explode," she added in a burst.

"Come with me," Nandini said gently, grasping Rajeshwari's arm. "We'll talk in the guest room."

*********************

Sankatmochan woke up from his nap on hearing a faint sound from the living room. Rubbing his eyes, he got up and lumbered out of his bedroom.

He found Prithvi standing before the book case, taking books out from the top shelf and rifling through them swiftly. The books were either being thrown to the floor or the sofa. So far, there were three books on the floor, and two on the sofa.

"What are you doing?" Sankatmochan enquired, looking curiously at the books as he walked into the room.

"Deciding which books to take along tomorrow," Prithvi said briefly, tossing a book to the floor.

"Oh...errr...yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that," Sankatmochan mumbled while pushing aside a black cotton blazer and climbing onto the sofa to sit cross-legged. The moment was here. He had to take the risk. A part of him was petrified that he was going to be grabbed by neck and shaken till his bones rattled. But by and large, he was praying that should be the case...

"What about it?"

"I was thinking...maybe, I should stay back for some days and come to Taravan later," Sankatmochan said tentatively.

"Sure, you can do that," Prithvi agreed unconcernedly.

"That's it?" Sankatmochan asked, horrified. "You're not going to ask me why?"

While reading the blurb of a thick book, Prithvi inattentively said, "Fine. I beg you to tell me the reason before I die of curiosity."

********************

In the sun-lit room, Nandini closed the doors lightly and dragged the chair to the bed on which Rajeshwari was already seated. She sat in front of Rajeshwari, who unconsciously turned to face a corner of the room, and abruptly launched into speech, clearly wanting the ordeal to be over quickly.

"When we were travelling abroad, I started to like someone," Rajeshwari said tightly. "I'd thought he liked me too. But neither of us were okay with it...because there are some huge complications," she said dejectedly. "We both felt it would be wrong for us to...be together. Because of that - and some other reasons, we hadn't talked freely or spent time together for months. I didn't think anyone had noticed the change in our relationship. But then...from some things that Bua said...I felt she had understood, and that she was against it. I was terrified. I couldn't bear for her to be disappointed with me, and I also couldn't stand the idea of Prithvi finding out. Then Bua launched the Adityaraj Foundation, and she was looking for someone to oversee the setting up of the foundation in India. I begged her to give me the chance. I wanted to remove the look of disappointment from her face, and I wanted her and Prithvi to be proud of me."

"But Prithvi was against it," Rajeshwari confided dolefully. "He refused to let me come to India by myself. And he told me repeatedly that I would not enjoy the work. I made a big fuss. I cried and refused to eat until he agreed to let me travel to India. He made sure I had the best team to take care of me, and he arranged for me to stay in the nicest places while I travelled. But Bua told me in private that I needed to experience the life of poor people to understand their needs, and for that I would need to live in places that were small and dirty and didn't have any good facilities. She gave me the choice. I was frightened but I was also eager to make her happy, so I agreed. Prithvi was furious, but I created a fuss again and forced him to agree."

"It took me just three days to know that he was right. I hated it," Rajeshwari said with a shudder. "I hated travelling to those remote, filthy areas, and meeting poor people, and living in ghastly houses. But Bua was so proud of me...I couldn't back out."

She took a deep breath, and resumed, "After I returned to India, I thought about my relationship with – with that man more seriously, and I began to feel it would not be wrong if we wanted to spend our lives together," she said despondently. "When I heard the dates of his return to India, I thought if I could convince him to meet me and talk about our relationship, we would be able to find a way. He was not willing at first. But I convinced him with a lot of difficultly. After he agreed, I kept thinking about where we could meet."

"It had to be a place where I could be sure that none of my family members would visit. But actually, there were only two people in my family who could have found out about this. Prithvi and Priyamvada Bua," Rajeshwari sighed. "I don't remember if I've told you this...but once Prithvi goes to his cabin, only Sumer Singh is allowed to get in touch with him. So, I wasn't worried much about Prithvi. But Bua...she always knows everything. And I'd often had a feeling that she had hired people to watch over me and keep track of my movements - just to keep me safe because she loves me," she added protectively while giving Nandini a quick glance to check her expression.

Nandini attempted to adjust her features into a smile and gave a nod to convey a non-existent belief in Rajeshwari's words. She knew she'd succeeded when the other woman relaxed slightly.

"Is that you looked very worried just before you left the shopping centre that day?" Nandini asked circumspectly.

Staring at the corner of the room, Rajeshwari nodded and glumly said, "I remembered that Priyamvada Bua doesn't like you. And I'd not wanted to do anything that could hurt her. I wasn't sure if her men were around me that day or not. But in case they were, I didn't want them to see me talking to you. It would have made Bua very angry."

Rajeshwari paused briefly, and then said, "Do you remember how shocked I was when I saw you?"

With a dizzying jumble of thoughts in her mind, Nandini nodded.

"It wasn't only because it was an unexpected meeting," Rajeshwari said. "I had been thinking of Shamli for some days – and then you approached me out of the blue...it felt unreal."

"Why had you been thinking of Shamli?" Nandini asked, mystified.

Rajeshwari sighed again. "I'd thought it would be the safest place for my meeting with...him. And after the unexpected meeting with you, I convinced myself it was a good omen. That maybe it was destined that I should meet him in Shamli, and that I could use your home as a base while I was here. That's why I called you to Nikhumbh...to establish a connection with you for my own selfish purposes," she said remorsefully.

"Rajeshwari, everything that you did...it was for a true, beautiful purpose," Nandini said softly. "You don't have to feel guilty. But I still haven't understood why you felt Shamli was the right place," she adjoined uncertainly.

"Bua hates this town," Rajeshwari said uncomfortably. "She is also terrified of it. I don't know why. But she can't bear to hear its name even. I found that out by accident many months ago. It was after Bua had announced her decision that the family would return to India. I heard a conversation between her and Haimavati – she is Bua's Dai maa. It happens that way at times...I end up being in places where people are having private discussions," she said defensively. "And then I don't like to be seen by them, so I have to listen to the whole conversation."

"That happens to everyone," Nandini lied soothingly. "I know it's not intentional."

Soothed by the assurance, Rajeshwari eagerly said, "Yes, yes, exactly. So...on that day, Haimavati was talking about Prithvi and...you."

"Me?" Nandini asked, taken aback.

*************************

Sankatmochan hesitated for some seconds, then decided to jump into the fire. "If I have to be truthful, I'll have to mention Nandini," he said cautiously.

"You can tell me whatever you want about whomever you want," Prithvi replied offhandedly. "Ignore what I said yesterday."

Sankatmochan felt confused by the dispassionate statement. But he had to proceed resolutely.

"Oh...alright, I'll tell you, but I want you to sit down first," he said anxiously.

"So you can stare at me like an owl and imagine what I'm thinking and feeling while you narrate a fictious tale related to Nandini," Prithvi rejoined dryly.

"Yes. No! No, it's not about that," Sankatmochan fibbed quickly, embarrassed. "I have to give you a long explanation, so I thought – and it's not fictitious," he claimed. "I won't be making anything up, I swear," he claimed.

"What happened to you, Mochi?" Prithvi said with a deep sigh, moving to sit down on the opposite couch. "You used to be reasonably good at lying through your teeth once upon a time..."

Sankatmochan scratched his head shamefacedly but insisted, "I'm not lying. I'm going to tell you what happened for real. And this is...it's related to the marriage proposals that Nandini has been receiving," he spouted in a rush, half-prepared to dodge any murderous attempts.

"Okay, what about it?" Prithvi asked seriously.

The distress on Sankatmochan's face grew by several degrees. The young man who had left Shamli years ago would have throttled him by now. But maybe Prithvi hadn't really understood the significance of his words. Some truthful details would help him drive home the point...

"Some of the rich and powerful families in Shamli who have sons or grandsons or nephews of marriageable age have been pestering Babaji for Nandini's hand in marriage," Sankatmochan elucidated. "These people assume he will be thrilled to get receive proposals from them for Nandini. But Babaji usually finds something objectionable in their backgrounds or the boy's horoscope and then he sends them packing. Some families have been shamelessly insistent, but Babaji has been handling them easily. But I think he's facing a bigger issue with someone this time. When we were returning from the village, he was unusually preoccupied. And I heard him yelling at someone on the phone today about a proposal. Though I only heard his part of the conversation, I think they spoke to him aggressively. It might not be anything serious, but I think I should stay back for some days just in case..."

Dismay had overtaken Sankatmochan by the time he'd ended his narration. He had stared meticulously at Prithvi's expression while he'd been speaking, and he'd seen only a calm thoughtfulness on the fair features...not the smallest hint of anger or disgust.

"Based on what you heard, did it seem like they threatened him?" Prithvi asked evenly, acknowledging without words that his friend had been truthful.

"No. I think they were just angry," Sankatmochan confessed grudgingly.

"Okay...I don't think you need to be worried," Prithvi dismissed.

"You really think so?" Sankatmochan asked half-heartedly.

"I do. If anything, I think you should be more concerned for the poor souls who think she is worth the effort," Prithvi answered briefly.

"Don't say that about her," Sankatmochan shouted angrily.

Prithvi's gaze turned cold as ice.

A vicious shiver ran down Sankatmochan's spine, cooling his anger instantly. He'd seen his friend's ferocious temper flare up innumerable times since childhood. But he hadn't felt as petrified as he did right now...

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to raise my voice," Sankatmochan said hurriedly, scared stiff.

"It's fine," Prithvi said grimly. "But be careful not to do it again."

"I won't. I just became a little upset when you...look, I don't know what happened between you and Nandini," Sankatmochan cried out. "You left, and then she went off with that lady, and when she returned, she was different. And you – you didn't return for years! I'm not going to ask you what happened, but I want you to know how much Nandini has suffered," he said earnestly. "I've seen her pain. I've seen her struggle with it every day. And - I don't think you know this...Sumer Singh had forbidden me from telling you. But shortly after she returned to Shamli, Nandini fell seriously ill. We had to hospitalise her in the middle of the night because she was suffering from a high fever, nausea and headache. The fever didn't subside fully for days!"

"That must have been tough on the family," Prithvi reflected. "But I hope you're not going to blame her flu on me," he said, brows raised.

******************

"Haimavati said she was happy that Prithvi had forgotten about you," Rajeshwari muttered without looking at Nandini. "but she was afraid that you wouldn't give up your attempts to snare him because we're rich. And she was worried that after we return to India, you might try to contact Prithvi and – you can imagine what she meant," she mumbled. "She told Bua that after the family returns to India, some people should be hired to stay in Shamli and keep a watch over you and Prithvi, and make sure that you both don't meet up again. At first, Bua laughed at her. She said...well, almost the same things she told you. But her words were crueller back then. Then she said Prithvi would not forgive you in this lifetime, so there was no cause for concern. I'm sorry for telling you this...I shouldn't have," she apologised, glancing at Nandini's pallid but set features.

"You don't need to apologise. It doesn't affect me," Nandini said emotionlessly.

Not noticing the rigidly clenched fists in Nandini's lap, Rajeshwari sincerely replied, "You're really strong. I wish I could be like you," she said wistfully.

Nandini tried to smile, then said, "You were saying..."

Rajeshwari waited a moment to collect her memories, then slowly said, "Yes...so Bua was initially saying these things very lightly, but as she continued to talk, she became more serious about the issue. She told Haimavati that she didn't want to have any link with this town or your family...not even through a surveillance team. She said your family and Shamli were worse than a deadly plague for her...and had always brought bad luck for her. Then she walked away and went into her room and didn't come out again that evening."

"When I was listening to Bua, it sounded as if there was some protective charm over you and your family...and over this town as well. Something that would stop her from interfering," Rajeshwari said helplessly. "So, when I began to plan everything, Shamli...and your house...seemed to be the ideal place. I felt if I met the man whom I like in this town...and if I stayed with you, I would be protected too from her surveillance. It sounds utterly foolish now, but I'd truly thought it was a great plan back then," she said brokenly. "I spent days and nights thinking about it...trying to think of every angle so that nothing could no wrong. I even tried to look for information on the internet about how to arrange such meetings. I don't remember everything always, so I kept notes. I decided to leave the rest of my team behind, but I was afraid of travelling alone, so I brought Disha along."

"I was careful about the smallest of things. But he...he wasn't willing to help at all. He didn't know I was going to stay with you. I told him I would stay in an independent bungalow along with my team. He told me that I should not mingle with anyone here, because he hates commoners. The rules about my stay in your house...I came up with those for his sake. I did everything for just one meeting with him to talk about our feelings. He was supposed to meet me just for an hour or two that day. But I thought...if our feelings were true and serious, I could convince him to stay back for some days, so that we could meet during the day and talk freely about our future."

"He told me we could not be seen together in public. But he wasn't willing to meet me in a suite because it would be disgraceful. That's why I chose the banquet hall. A table set up in the hall, just for us. So we could talk without any fears of being spied upon or overheard. I reached the hotel in the afternoon. And I received a message that he was here...and I was so happy, I went running to the hall and I found..."

Rajeshwari shivered.

**************************

"I...not exactly..." Sankatmochan mumbled. "But many tests were carried out, but they didn't show anything being wrong with her physically. I think she fell sick because she was heartbroken over the break-up with you."

"That's great theory," Prithvi appreciated. "You should use some of that imagination for the book you've been sitting on for years."

"It's not just a theory. I know it's true," Sankatmochan said almost pleadingly. "She has been refusing to even consider marriage in spite of being under terrible pressure. And I know it's for your sake. I know it. I honestly believe she loves you more today than she did back then."

Prithvi regarded him ironically. "Mochi, I'm not sure about what she felt for me back then. But it was not love. And if she's refusing to get married now, I can guarantee the reasons have nothing to do with me."

"It's not just the marriage issue," Sankatmochan said urgently. "Shortly after she returned, Nandini began walking barefoot to a Kali temple that's very far away on Fridays, and she also started to keep tough fasts. She has been doing all of that for you."

"Did you come up with that bullshit by yourself?" Prithvi asked amusedly. "Or did she help?"

"Nandini hasn't told me anything," Sankatmochan decried, aghast. "But I know I'm right."

"Mochi, take a sharp look at your dosage of entertainment shows," Prithvi advised. "They are obviously causing severe brain damage."

Sankatmochan agitatedly said, "No, Prithvi, you have to believe me -"

"Okay...just for a second...let me assume you're right," Prithvi interrupted smoothly, adopting a placating tone. "You know what I see then in those idiotic things she has been doing? Signposts of guilt," he said flatly. "None of it is for me. She's trying to feel better about what she did. And for people like her, the easiest way to feel better is to dump the responsibility of their actions on an imaginary being. There is nothing more to it. You'll understand it too if you can set aside your attachment to her for a moment and think logically. Now is there something more you want to share about her undying love for me or can I get back to what I was doing?" he enquired with a cutting mockery.

Sankatmochan's stared at his friend with a combination of dismay and confusion. Then he shook his head and unhappily mumbled, "No, there's nothing else. I'm going out for a while."

Utterly dispirited, Sankatmochan left the house, shoulders slumped in defeat.

Prithvi rose up from the couch and stood before the book case again. He looked at the books without seeing them, briefly lost in imagining the large-scale destruction of everything in the world.

Then he picked a book from the second shelf and gazed at the title. A second later, the book was hurled to the floor with unnecessary violence...

***********************

In a hoarse voice, Rajeshwari continued shakily, "After Bua left, he called me up. He apologised for everything...for not coming to Shamli, and for confessing everything to Bua. I was so angry that night...but then he sent caring messages and he even called up yesterday to ask me how I was, and to tell me that Bua had promised to conceal this horrible incident from the others in the family. I thought...maybe he did feel strongly about me. And then today morning, he sent a message that he had arrived at a decision. He said our relationship doesn't have any future, and he does not want to go ahead with it," she said despairingly. "I know...I deserved it. I was so stupid and reckless. When I think about it now...I can see it was a senseless plan from start to end. I'm amazed I didn't land in bigger trouble because of it. I'm sure that is what you're thinking too..."

Rajeshwari waited for a reassuring, affectionate response but didn't get it. She turned indecisively to look at Nandini and received a shock.

Nandini's eyes were flooded with tears, and large drops of water were slowly sliding down her cheeks.

"Why are you crying?" Rajeshwari asked in horror.

"It's nothing, I'll be okay in a minute," Nandini mumbled, her voice shaking, as she got up and turned away from Rajeshwari. She had to compose herself quickly.  Prakash had gone to a  friend's house and her grandfather was in the temple. But her mother was in the house, and she could knock on the door any minute. There would not be any questions about her conversation with Rajeshwari, but it would be hard to explain away the tears. 

Nandini wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand again, but a fresh stream of tears gushed out. 

Rajeshwari rose to her feet and stared at Nandini in panic. Then she walked to Nandini and patted her shoulder in what she felt was a comforting manner. Trying to lighten the situation, she weakly asked, "Are you crying over my stupidity?"

Nandini spun around, battling a new onslaught of tears. "You're not stupid," she said fiercely in a thick, hoarse voice. "Don't ever call yourself that. You're a brave woman. You left behind the comforts you knew and you put so much at risk for love. You faced your fears and dealt with huge challenges...and you did it alone, without any support from the person you love. You put your heart and soul into planning a meet with him...just to express your feelings and decide the path ahead. The things you've done require resilience and strength of the kind that I can't imagine," she said, her voice trembling. 

Rajeshwari's face turned red, and tears began to form in her eyes too.

"Don't berate yourself again," Nandini continued unsteadily. "You have extraordinary courage. I want you to understand that about yourself. Once you do, you'll know you deserve to be with someone who is as exceptional as you are. Whenever you think about this incident in your life in the future, remind yourself that you don't need to be ashamed of anything. The people who should be ashamed are those who hurt you and let you down. If the person you love does not stand by you when you need them the most, they don't deserve to be a part of your life," she whispered as tears streamed down her face.

Starting to weep, Rajeshwari hugged her.

*****************************

Manohar marched enthusiastically to the lovely woman who was walking at a languorous pace to the dining hall. He stopped at a respectable distance and bowed to Priyamvada, who halted and regarded him with mild distaste.

"You asked for me, your highness?" he asked eagerly.

"I did. We will be having guests tomorrow, Manohar," Priyamvada informed him. "Mr. and Mrs. Garewal. They will stay for two or three days with us. You have their personal secretary's number, don't you?"

"Yes, your highness," Manohar said.

"Coordinate with him, and make sure they have a very comfortable trip to Devgarh," Priyamvada commanded. "And ask the housekeeping staff to get one of our best rooms ready for them."

"Yes, your highness."

"They should not lack for anything while they are here. Is that understood?" Priyamvada said flatly.

"Yes, your highness. They will be very pleased with the arrangements," Manohar promised.

"You may go now," Priyamvada said.

Manohar bowed and left, filled with a determination to elicit praise from the woman he loved.

Haimavati looked at Priyamvada incredulously.

The queen hated the middle-aged couple with a vengeance. Not only because they were very close to that horrid family in Shamli but also because of their attachment to Prithvi - and Prithvi's fondness for them.

"Your highness, why are you inviting those people to stay?" Haimavati asked her in a low tone, bewildered.

"You know that old saying, Dai maa," Priyamvada answered with a secretive smile. "Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer." She ignored the persisting uncertainty on Haimavati's face and continued to move towards the hall.

Internally, however, she was sighing deeply.

If ever a saying was drafted specifically for her...

************************