Chapter Five

"You have got to be the most stubborn person I've ever met in my whole fucking life, and I'm over a few thousand years old."

I glared at Hades, who stood by the bed with his arms folded over his chest, a tray of food sitting on the nightstand. I folded my arms over my chest, mostly out of mockery.

"I'm not eating," I stated in refusal, but I couldn't help glancing at the tray anyway. Because the food looked so damn good. Fresh baked bread, some kind of sandwich with meats and cheeses, a bowl of some kind of chunky soup. It smelled fucking incredible. I'd never had food smell so damn good before. It took everything I had not to just throw my hands up and go for it anyway.

The thought of getting sick, though, turned me off. I wasn't going to eat. I couldn't risk it, not now, not when I was so close to getting out of here. Once they finished their tests, they wouldn't need me anymore and I could fucking... I don't know. Find out who fucked me over and kill them.

Yeah and then what?

I don't know. Die probably. There was nothing left for me after that. The Mother wasn't going to take me back and I wasn't the type to beg. I sure as fuck wasn't staying here. These people were fucking nuts. I had no money, no job, nothing. I couldn't go anywhere or do anything. So dying seemed like the only reasonable option. Perhaps I would die killing whoever tortured me. That would be nice.

"You need to eat something," Hades said again, making me glance up at him, "At least take a bite of something. Anything."

"Why don't you take a bite of something?" I returned. Hades rolled his eyes, but surprised me when he took off a piece of bread, ate it, then looked at me, almost expectantly. Damn, he really wanted me to eat something. It was so fucking weird.

"Why do you give a shit whether I eat or not?" I asked dryly. It would just be easier if he healed me and kicked me out already. What was he hanging on for? Was this about being his kid? Because that shit was stupid. He didn't even know me. For all he knew, I could be a psycho murderer who likes to eat babies for breakfast.

"Because you need to get your strength up if you want to go out there and live," Hades said sternly, "You were tortured for gods' know how long. You were starved. You're malnourished. Your muscles have atrophied. The best way to start recovering is to eat something. Even if it's just a single goddamn bite of food."

"How about no?"

"Holy fuck," Hades turned around and stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him so hard that it rattled. I smirked, watching him leave, then slumped back against the bed and sighed heavily.

I didn't need to eat. I was fine without it. I was fine before with my single meal a day even. If I could go for months without eating, I could go for a few more months. I got that it would probably help me heal faster, but I wasn't going to risk it. I didn't trust these people. Their talk was just that; talk. They could talk, talk, talk, all day long about how they're such good people and love everyone, but that was bullshit. Who loved a complete stranger?

I shook my head at that, then looked up when I heard the door open. I sat up, expecting Hades to come back with some new plan to get me to eat, except it wasn't Hades this time. It was a different male, but he looked a lot like Hades. He was tall, like Hades, with dark hair, but where Hades's was long, this guy's hair was cut short. He had a couple days worth of beard on his jaw. His eyes were a piercing shade of green, like a cat's.

He came in wheeling some kind of cart with what looked like a burner on the top shelf. I narrowed my eyes suspiciously.

"Who are you? What do you want?" I demanded. The male looked up and surprised me when he smiled pleasantly.

"Sorry to barge in. My name's Ryk. I'm going to be taking care of you today," he replied. I stared at him, then couldn't resist laughing a little.

"I scared the almighty Hades away? Well, fuck me," I said. Ryk smiled as he pushed the cart over to the bedside and seemed to be plugging some things in.

"Hades isn't easily frightened," he answered, "But he is easily pissed off and I figured it best I intervene before Hades decides to throw you out the window." I snorted at that, but continued to watch him as he stood up and took some things out of the bottom of the cart. I scowled.

"Are you... cooking something?" I asked confused. Why the fuck was he in here cooking something? Didn't they have a kitchen somewhere?

"Absolutely," Ryk said, "I figure maybe something light might be a good starter. Let's do some fluffy pancakes." I stared at him, completely confused as I watched him get a pan out and start whipping pancake batter up in a bowl.

"Why the fuck are you doing that here?" I asked.

"So you can watch me make your food," Ryk replied, making me blink, "You don't trust us to make your food. That's completely understandable. So I figured, to reassure you that we are not trying to poison you, I will make your food right here in front of you." He held up a bottle so I could see the label. It didn't look tampered with. It was fresh too. He just opened the bottle and added it to the batter in the bowl. I frowned as I watched him cook.

"Why the fuck are you doing that?" I asked, looking up at him.

"So you'll eat."

"Why the fuck do you want me to eat so bad?"

"Because it will aid in healing you quicker. Your body is weak without food."

I gritted my teeth, but didn't say anything. I just watched him pour the batter into the pan, and listened to it sizzle in the light coating of butter. It smelled so fucking good. It smelled sweet and buttery and delicious. I could feel my mouth watering up.

Was this okay?

He was making it right here. Each ingredient he used was unopened. He wasn't adding anything without showing me what it was and that he had just opened the container.

Why was he doing this?

Confused, I watched him plate three thick fluffy pancakes. He grabbed a bottle of some kind of brown liquid and placed it on a tray, then pushed the tray over onto my lap. I looked down at the food, then up at Ryk, who watched me with that same encouraging smile. I didn't know what to do. He was just watching me expectantly and he reminded me of a dog, excitedly wagging its tail and waiting for some kind of approval. I looked at him, then at the food.

Gods, it smelled so good.

He made it right in front of me.

It should be fine, right?

I picked up a fork and poked around at the pancakes for a moment, then looked up.

"We got pancakes once a month," I said stupidly without thinking, and Ryk looked at me curiously, "At the compound, they gave us pancakes once a month. We usually just ate eggs and toast."

"Not much variety."

"Doesn't matter. Food is food," I replied, then looked down at the pancakes. I speared a mouthful and brought it to my lips, then hesitated as my stomach pitched forward and growled viciously. It was the first time I'd heard it make a noise since before my capture. I'd just gotten so used to starving, even my stomach didn't care for food anymore.

I was still hesitant. I fucking hated to say it, but I was fucking afraid of it. I didn't want to bite into it and start to feel sick or hot or horny. I just wanted to take a regular bite of food and feel something in my stomach.

Finally, I parted my lips and put the pancakes in my mouth.

It was all over after that.

The pancakes were so fluffy and sweet with the slightest hint of cinnamon. I chewed a couple times, swallowed, then abandoned the fork and picked up the pancakes with my hands. I fucking devoured those pancakes in seconds. It was a goddamn record for me. One second those pancakes were sitting in a neat pile on the plate and in the next, they were all gone.

Ryk smiled.

"How about some more?" He asked. I nodded and pushed the plate back toward him. Ryk fired up his pan and made six more pancakes, all of which I inhaled. I sat back against the pillows, breathing out a sigh of relief at finally having something in my stomach. It felt so good and warm... and sluggish. Where did the sluggishness come from?

Panicked, I sat upright and Ryk frowned.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't feel good."

"Okay," Ryk said, setting everything down and moving the cart aside, "It's alright. It's because it's been so long." His words didn't make sense to me for some reason. There was only this growing panic inside as I felt a little off kilter. I was feeling strangely nauseated and chilled right to the bone.

"What did you do to it?" I demanded immediately, jerking my head up. Ryk frowned.

"I didn't do anything to it. You saw me make it."

"Then why do I feel like shit?"

"You ate too fast. I should've slowed you down, but I was just happy to see you eat. Just take a second to relax, take a deep breath, drink some water."

"No," I managed, "No, I'm... I'm not going to do that." I scooted to the other side of the bed, shoving the blankets back and Ryk quickly came around to the other side of the bed just as I was leaning over and puking. Every last bit of pancake came right back up and splattered to the floor as Ryk came over and put his hand on my back while I vomited.

"Okay, alright," Ryk said gently, "It's alright. We'll figure it out."

"No," I said through dribbles of puke, "I'm not eating! Goddamn it! I told you no!"

"This has nothing to do with the food. It's just your body rejecting too much food at once. Just take a deep breath and let me get you some water," Ryk said. His voice was so gentle and calm. How could he be so fucking chill? Did he expect this to happen? Was he waiting for this? Was the water poisoned too?

Ryk held a glass of water out to me and I immediately slapped it out of his hand so it shattered to the floor.

"No! I don't want anything else! Goddamn it, why can't you people just fucking let me go? I don't need to be here! I need to be out there!"

"Out there doing what?" Ryk asked. I glared at him as he stared at me sternly.

"No, tell me," Ryk said, "What should you be out there doing? Fighting? Working for your precious Mother? Ah, except you can't anymore. You don't belong to her anymore. Now you have no funds. So how are you supposed to find a place to stay? No one is going to let you into their inn for free and I highly doubt you're willing to do favors for someone in order to secure a room. So you're broke, we've covered that."

"Shut up!"

"To top it off, you're weak. Your body can barely support itself on its own right now, why do you think we have you hooked up to these machines? You think it's just jewelry we stuck on you to make you pretty? Those things are helping keep you alive, because you can't do it yourself."

"Fuck off!"

"You can't even eat properly in order to recover your strength. So now you're just laying helpless in a bed because you can't do anything by yourself. And yet you want to go out there? And do what? What do you want to do?" Ryk asked. I felt my temper rising. I went to punch him, but he caught my wrist, surprising me. He wasn't even using much force. He took hold of my wrist and squeezed, making me wince.

"What did you think you were going to do? Hit me? With what little strength you have left? Such a waste," Ryk commented, making me fume, "Instead of wasting time fucking around, perhaps you should actually eat your meals, regain your strength, and then we can talk about what you can do next."

"Get off me," I snarled, trying to twist my wrist away from him, but he held fast, "Get off me!"

Ryk released my wrist and I went to hit him again, but he caught my arm and twisted it around onto the bed, making me gasp as he whipped me around onto my face and stomach.

"Are you finished or should I make you look more pathetic?" Ryk asked.

"Fuck you!"

"Not likely."

"Let me go! I just want the fuck out of here!"

"Sure," Ryk said at last, releasing me and I gasped in relief, then swung back around to glare at him, "Go ahead. Leave. Stand up and walk out the door. I implore you to do so." I shoved the rest of the blankets back and swung my legs over the side of the bed, going to heave myself up to my feet, but my knees buckled and I went crashing to the floor. Ryk didn't even bother to help me up. He just stood there with his arms folded over his chest, staring down at me patiently.

"Are you quite finished or shall I go open the door so you can make your dramatic escape?" He asked. I clenched my fists against the floor and didn't look up. I didn't want to lift my face because fucking hell, I was embarrassed as shit.

Gods, I used to be strong. I was fucking jacked. I could pick someone like Ryk up off his feet and throw him across the room without a second thought. I could've slammed his face into the floor and knocked out all his teeth. Hell, I could fucking stand on my own two feet and fucking leave if I wanted to.

Now I couldn't even stand up. I couldn't eat. I couldn't defend myself.

You're weak.

My stomach shriveled up on itself and suddenly, I was fucking exhausted. My muscles, what little was left of them, turned to rubber and I slumped back down on the floor, my cheek pressing against the cool marble floor. I stared at Ryk's boots as he continued to look down at me.

"May I return you to bed?" Ryk asked. I didn't answer. I didn't want to open my mouth. Ryk seemed to accept that as my answer and stooped down. I felt his arms go up under mine and he heaved me up off the floor and plopped me back in bed without so much as a grunt.

"Now," Ryk said, "I'm going to make you some soup instead. It might be lighter on your stomach. Are you going to eat it?" I didn't answer him. I just stared at the bed. Ryk studied me.

"I'm sorry I was so harsh," he said after a moment, making me frown and glance at him, "But you need to recognize that you are no longer as strong as you used to be, and you cannot behave that way anymore. Not everyone around here is going to baby you like Hades does." I tensed at that.

"How the fuck is Hades babying me?"

"He's not whacking you over the head with a frying pan and forcing food down your throat," Ryk deadpanned, making me frown further, "You are obviously suffering from trauma, physically and mentally. You're scared, and that's okay. You're in a strange place with strange people who keep telling you that you're family, a word you don't seem to understand. You don't understand the world outside of the compound, and unfortunately, the world is so, so much bigger than the compound and so much more complex. You don't know half the stuff you're supposed to at your age."

"What the fuck does that mean?"

"It means you were brainwashed as a child and it followed you into adulthood. And now that you've lost your safety net, the Mother and her people, you're going to feel lost and afraid and that is perfectly okay. It just means you're experiencing a new world. Take it one step at a time."

"You people keep saying brainwashed, but you're the ones who are brainwashed," I snapped, making Ryk relax at that, for some reason.

"Oh? And how am I brainwashed?"

"You have an evil dictator as your leader and his husband is just as fucked up and stupid. You people don't know how to maintain order in your own fucking worlds, so people get away with killing and raping and..." My voice trailed as a strange sensation started in the back of my head. It was like a memory was desperately tugging at me, like a kid tugging on their mom's sleeve. I tried to focus on it, but when I did, it just escaped, smoke through my fingers.

"What did you remember?" Ryk asked me. I looked at him, confused.

"Nothing," I replied honestly, "Literally not a fucking thing." Ryk inclined his head. I stared at him for a moment, then swallowed.

"What happened to me? Theo said I was tortured, but I don't remember anything," I said. Ryk frowned.

"Your brain is trying to protect you from whatever it was that happened to you. Frankly, I don't think you should explore what happened to you. It's better you don't remember."

"Then how the fuck am I supposed to know who to kill," I snapped, making Ryk cock his head, "When I get the fuck out of here, and I fucking will, I'm going to find the asshole that tortured me and kill him."

"Good. But you can't do that until you regain your strength," Ryk replied, making me growl in frustration, "Don't give me that. You want to find this guy and kill him for what he did to you? I'll help you." I blinked, then scowled.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

"Why the fuck would you help me?"

"Because I don't like people who torture others," Ryk said, making me pause, "Torture is something cowards use because they're too much of a pussy to face you. Whoever it was that hurt you is a coward. A coward and a monster and those are the worst kinds of people. So yeah. I'll help you find out who it is and I'll fucking take you to the guy myself and watch you kill him." I looked at him, confused. Why the fuck did he care? Okay, so he didn't like torture; yeah, I got that, but did he really hate it so much he was willing to help me find the person and kill them? That kind of offer wasn't to be taken lightly.

"I can't trust you," I said at last. Ryk inclined his head.

"Understandable. Then allow me, while you heal, to show you that I can be trusted."

"How?"

"I'll figure it out," Ryk answered, making me glare, "But for now, if you want to find this fucker, you will eat. You will practice getting up and walking around yourself. Then when you're well enough, you can start training. In the meantime, I will do my own digging and see what I can find out." I clenched my teeth. I wasn't sure how I felt about his offer.

On one hand, I didn't trust the guy as far as I could throw him... which wasn't very far. He hadn't specifically done anything to fuck me over yet, but there was always time. He could slip poison into my food later on down the road, or try to brainwash me over to his side, or something fucking nuts.

On the other hand, I couldn't do this on my own. I knew that. I didn't have the Mother's resources, or even my own. I needed to start over from scratch and the best way to do that was with the ingredients already on hand, and Ryk just happened to be one of those.

"Fine," I said at last, making Ryk look at me, mildly surprised, "I'll eat your garbage. I'll follow the doctor's orders. But nobody touches me. Nobody fucks with me. I don't want your namby-pamby family bullshit. I'm not here to be anyone's fucking dress up doll. I'm here to get off my ass and get out there and kill someone. So cut it with the but your parents bullshit. I don't have parents. I don't have siblings. All I care about is revenge." Ryk studied me for the longest time and I expected him to drop whatever ruse he was playing and tell me to go fuck myself, but instead, he held his hand out and I scowled.

"What?"

"Let's shake on it then," Ryk said, "You behave, follow our orders, get better, then we won't stop you from seeking revenge."

"Deal," I said, reaching out and taking his hand.