ѕ02/ᴇ04 - ᴛᴏᴛᴀʟ ʀɪᴄᴋᴀʟʟ

ғʟᴀsʜʙᴀᴄᴋs - ɪᴛᴀʟɪᴄs

In the living room, Rick counted every person in the room and wrote it on a piece of paper for him to make sure that everyone there, was supposed to be there because eh knew how easily his stupid family could be fooled.

There was a large seven on the wall as you sat on the couch, Morty sat beside you as Summer stood by her mum near the window. Jerry was behind the couch and Mr. Poopybutthole was standing near you in front of the couch, "Alright there's seven people here, so there must always be seven." He looked aggravated and paranoid and Mr. Poopybutthole noticed this as he spoke loudly, a wide smile on his face, "Maybe~ you got the first one in time, Rick!"

Rick cocked his laser gun and spoke gruffly, "Can't take any chances." In a second, there were metal plates covering all the windows and doors that were sealed shut so that nothing could come inside or outside. You knew that once the parasites made themselves known, they would try to create pleasant memories so that they could convince Rick to let them out.

Beth stepped forward with her hands resting on her waist, "Dad, why is the house covered in blast shields?" You sat up, crossing a leg under your ass to sit more comfortably and burped, gaining their attention, "Sweetie, you don't wanna know how many answers that question has."

She raised a brow, slight shock taking over her face and you realised your mistake, "Oh jeez are we really that paranoid now? I'm not a damn parasite, they're filthy and I could think of infinite ways to take over a planet way more efficient than this."

The endearing name startled her, just as it startled Morty and Summer too. They were still sceptical about you and who you really were and they didn't understand what had happened when they heard another Summer calling you her Grandma. They couldn't comprehend how it could make sense unless you really were Ricks wife or ex-wife. Perhaps it happened in another dimension or a lot of them but they didn't know the one that stood in their living room right now.

Rick looked at you and he agreed, he didn't care for the way you said it because it was familiar to him, it was how he tended to speak as well and unlike his family, it didn't necessarily concern him due to the fact that there were alien parasites in their home, trying to plant false memories in their heads to multiply and take over their fucking planet.

"Oo-wee, I'm feeling~ a bit claustrophobic, this reminds me of that time we were all stuck on that elevator, you remember that?" Mr. Poopybutthole spoke with a high-pitched voice and everyone began looking around in thought as you grabbed the flask from your jacket pocket and twisted the cap open, answering before taking a drink, "Nope, not at all."

Everybody seemed to remember while you sat on the couch, reaching for the television remote before someone else came in through the doorway from the kitchen, "What the fuck?"

"Well you know, we really do get into strange situations as a family." You raised a brow when the family laughed at the sight of the new guy, we spoke with an Italian accent and he appeared friendly, smiling with a button up shirt with no sleeves as he wore jeans as well. He pointed to Mr. Poopybutthole and spoke again, "But maybe Mr. Poopypants is right, let's all go outside for some fresh air."

Morty countered him with little to no doubt at all, "C-come on cousin Nicky, we have to stay quarantined until we know there are no more of these things."

Rick acknowledged this and looked around, you noticed his eyes squinting as they moved to each person inside the house and then he looked back at the page on the wall, "Aye, I know what you're saying' Morty, back in Brooklyn, we got a sayin,' 'We're walking here~!"

Rick heard a quiet whistle and then he saw you, he noticed you rolling your eyes which caused him some irritation before you made another one of your signals that weren't subtle at all. You made two finger guns, pointing them at 'Cousin Nicky' and Rick got out his laser gun and shot without hesitation. He was grateful that you were paying attention to your surroundings when he almost, almost let himself be fooled. Nicky screamed when the bullet penetrated his skin and then his normal skin that made him appear human had transformed and then he was just like Jerry's 'goofy brother Steve.'

"Cousin Nicky wa-was one of them too!?"

Morty backed away, a fearful look on his face and you stood to get away from the pink blood that sprayed over the side of the couch, "Th-Thanks.. [Name]." You lazily saluted Rick and he pointed to the page on the wall, "Seven, Morty!"

"There's supposed to only be seven of us and if there's eight then that obviously means someone isn't real. Rick and I shouldn't be the only ones who have to pay attention to it!" Morty looked at you and he was tempted to ask why you seemed so calm before his mother spoke over him, "But how did you know it was Nicky?"

Beth glanced at you and then to her Dad, Rick shrugged his shoulders quickly and answered, "I guessed, that's why I aimed for his shoulder. Plu-plus, [Name] told me to as well."

"So we can't even trust our own memories now? Nicky was the reason we found that old Nazi submarine, did that not even happen?"

"Highly likely that it didn't." Jerry raised a brow at you, looking all smug as he answered his wife with a certain pride that made you annoyed for some reason, "Of course it did!"

"Perhaps I'm biased but if that story never happened well then I wouldn't still be the family's butler!" He pranced around in a posh style, speaking with an English accent and he wore a tuxedo, holding a tray of green olives on a toothpick. The butler offered the tray to everyone, they all took an olive immediately and immersed themselves in the joys of having their own butler.

"Wait.."

"And if Mr. Beauregard wasn't our butler, I think it's safe to say that the family would be in a hell~ of a lot of trouble." Summer cut Rick off, approaching the butler to grab another toothpick as her family laughed at what she had said, "Wha-Wai- who the he- I've never heard of a 'Mr. Beauregard.' what's up with that, then?"

Summer looked at you crossing your arms as you watched the butler, glaring at him for answers but he didn't look nervous in the slightest when he answered you without a stutter, "You don't remember, [Name]? When I brought you inside from the curb when you were well, fairly intoxicated."

"Lady [Name]? Oh dear, what are you doing here?"

He watched you cry into your arms as you laid helplessly on the road, lightly scratched upon your skin from the gravel and red cheeks from the alcohol. He saw the way your eyes were bloodshot and snot travelled from your nose to the outline of your lips as he immediately grabbed his handkerchief to wipe the wetness away.

You sobbed and once you had noticed the man who had approached you, you couldn't help yelling his name in desperation two hands reaching for him like a baby to its mother, "Mr. Beauregard! Ple-please take m-me inside..."

He didn't waste a moment to pick you up, carrying you in his arms as he made it into the warm home and onto the couch. He left for a second to grab a blanket. He turned on the Television and found that Ball Fondlers was on. He left again once he noticed your eyes were stuck on the Television and then came back with a hot cup of cocoa in his hands. He sat with you, got two advils from his hand and gave them to you as you downed them with a water he had. When the water was gone, he slid back on the couch and allowed you to snuggle closer to him, "Everything will be alright, dear."

"Don't worry, [Name], I'm sure every bad thing will always come to an end." You smiled at Sleepy Gary as he lead an equally tired Jerry up to their room and you couldn't help smiling lightly.

"Oh.. I-" Rick took note of the slightly confused look on your face and wasn't sure what to do now but he couldn't think of that when he yelled, "Wait, no flashbacks!"

Sleepy Gary stood behind the couch besides Beth and then when you noticed the loudness of the laughter as everyone reminisced together, watching as Frankenstein laughed with Morty on the couch and a fucking velociraptor chuckled on the single couch, "Everybody stop remembering," Rick silenced the extra people in the room, "These parasites are like bedbugs and every flashback is another mattress! Look! There's one supposed to be seven people in this house." He ripped the paper from the wall to show it off and Beth answered, "But there's always been eleven."

"No! The fact that I wrote this number down means there's supposed to be four parasites."

"Are you sure about that, Rick?" Frankenstein gave him an odd look and Mr. Beauregard added, "Begging your pardon, Master Rick but I do recall a great deal of confusion surrounding that number."

Rick looked around at everyone and he was eager to come to a conclusion, he found your eyes watching his and he wanted to know what he could do but he was confused and he knew you were beginning to get confused too, "Alr-urrrhp-right, there's supposed to be six, so it's; [Name] and me, Morty, Beth, Photography-Raptor, Jerry, Frankenstein, Mr. Beauregard, Mr. Poopybutthole and Summer."

He burped again and you felt warmth as you noticed the way he said your names together, Beth raised a single brow and questioned him, "Uh, Dad that's like ten people."

"Seven, ten, what's the difference~! I just love the number seven for no reason! Where's my pencil!?"

Another being showed up, he was a pen with arms and legs and he jumped to Rick with a smile, "Right here Rick, use me!"

"Awh, thanks, Pencilvester!" Rick drew another seven on the paper and stuck it to the wall.

"Ye-Yeah I guess that's what happened but I don't get why I'd do that.." He raised a hand to his face, thinking sceptically and you smiled at him, "Everyone makes mistakes, we'll get through this, Rick." Mr. Beauregard looked at you and smiled kindly, "I'm sure of it, Lady [Name]."

ᴘᴀʀᴀsɪᴛᴇs ᴘʟᴀɴᴛ ғᴀᴋᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴏʀɪᴇs ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʜᴇᴀᴅs

sᴀᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜɪs ᴘʀɪsᴏɴ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ʟɪғᴇ