(song: "Light Outside" - Absofacto)

"That's insane!" My mother angrily voices.

     She loads dishes into the washer with yellow rubber gloves and her hair pulled back into a single ponytail. She uses the back of her hand to wipe at an itch on her cheek.

     "No one puts Baby in a corner," she says with a glint in her eye.

     A "Dirty Dancing" reference, obviously my mother gifted me her terrible sense of humor.

     I lean against the kitchen counter-top, placing the clean dishes up into the cabinets with a lazy amount of effort. "Mom, this is serious. I can't see Kristen at school and they think I'm acting out because of Cassie."

     She looks at me squarely. "Aren't you?"

     I snort. "What are you talking about?"

     "Everything has happened because of how you handled Cassie leaving. You don't open up and share with me what you're going through, or how you feel. You acted on your own, and if I was Kristen's mother I'd have felt the same way. Jane isn't used to her daughter misbehaving, it's easy for her to see you as the root of the problem."

     "Mom, you're supposed to be on my side."

     She reaches her dirty gloved hand to pat my shoulder. "I am, sweetie. I'm also a parent and I understand how other parents think. I'll talk to the Summers and to Jane, then I'll talk to your Principal and counselor. The only way I can get them to ease up is if you straighten up, focus on doing well in school and stop letting Cassie's mistakes be your mistakes."

     "Deal."

    "Good. Go ahead and go take your shower." She flicks a few soap suds at me.

     "What about the dishes?"

     "You suck at putting them away, I can do it faster without you."

     "Wow, thanks mom."

     She gives me a lovingly maternal stare. "I love you, Toby."

     I smile back. "Yeah. You too, Mom."

     I head to my bathroom feeling resolved to do whatever it takes to see Kristen again. After a long, hot shower I send a text to her secret phone to let her know that she is on my mind. She doesn't send a reply back. It makes me feel crazy to stare at my phone waiting for a single line of text from her.

     Video games are a good way to distract myself from the waiting game. I wrap a towel against my waist and comb back wet hair with my fingers. I go to the one place in the house I can truly be my most comfortable self—my man cave.

     I descend down into my lair . . . and see a curly-haired girl standing in the center of the room holding up a photo Cassie and I took together when we were fourteen. At first, I think it's Kristen and that somehow she stealthily broke into my basement to see me, but the closer I get, I begin to realize that it's not her at all.

     "It feels like just yesterday. You were sitting alone during lunchtime and I was new in the area. We were both alone and didn't feel like we belonged there," she mumbles.

     Cassie turns to face me smiling.

     "Hi, Toby. Nice towel."

Two Years Ago . . .

     "What's something you hate about yourself?" Cassie sat with crossed-legs on my comforter, cutting out pictures from a magazine for our school project.

     I handed her a bottle of glue and thought about her question. "I think it'd be easier if you asked me what I didn't hate about myself."

     She frowned at me and poked her index finger against my cheek causing me to laugh. "Stop it. I think you're amazing, but I can relate. There's a lot of things I hate about myself too."

     I stop cutting paper and reach my hands to hold Cassie's leg and pull her closer towards me. Her knee touch against mine and our faces are only a foot away from each other. We'd always had more physical contact than was normal for friends. Our interactions teetered on the borderlines of friendship and lovers.

     "Like what?" I asked her.

     Her eyes stare boldly into mine.

     "Well, when I want something, I don't know how to quit until I have it. And I'll get it at any cost . . . "

"Cassie . . . what are you doing here?"

     Cassie flops down onto the couch and switches on the television set. She pulls up her knees to her chest and pats the space beside her to encourage me to join her. In the past I'd have sat beside her without question.

     "How did you get in here?" I ask without moving.

     She looks up at me and pats the seat again. "With that key your mom always leaves under the mat in case you forget yours."

     Slowly, I join her side. I use one hand to keep my towel around my waist and stare at the screen along with her. She's watching one of those true crime series with the complicated mysteries for the police to solve. I didn't like these types of shows because whatever anyone assumes is wrong until the very end when the truth is revealed.

     Cassie leans over to rest her head on my shoulder and I can feel her breathe.

     "I was afraid to love you, that's why I didn't notice your feelings for me. You are one of the most important people in my life. As a friend I could always keep you, as a girlfriend there was too much risk in losing you," she explains.

     I can understand that. Those were my reasons for not telling Cassie how I felt for four years.

     "Yeah, me too," I say.

     "You came to my rescue, Toby. You followed my postcards against all odds, even at the risk of your own life you searched for me and found me."

     "I wasn't alone," I remind her.

     "Kristen never would have looked for me if it weren't for you and you know it. She's a good friend, but not the type to take risks. She isn't like us."

     I reclaim my shoulder from her and put a little distance between us. "What is that supposed to mean?"

     She reaches out her hands to touch the sides of my face. It feels foreign to me, I don't get the heart palpitations and crazy euphoria from her anymore. Cassie and I had such an intimate friendship, I never noticed it before, but touching and being close against each other used to be normal place. Now, it feels like I'm cheating.

     "Both you and I connect in a strange and extreme way that she won't ever understand. We aren't normal people, you know that. We're . . . fire."

     I take hold of her hands and gently remove them from my face. For a moment we're holding hands. "That is exactly why we should never be in a relationship. We're combustible components, Cassie. Kristen balances me . . . you destroy me."

     "Four years Toby. We have so much history, aren't you even curious what it might be like for us to finally be together? If we burn up in flames or not, don't we deserve to find out?"

     Cassie leans into me until there's no space left. She parts her lips and in a matter of seconds her mouth is aiming directly for mine. For a split second her words strike a chord with me. I consider what it would be like with Cassie. I knew a friendship with her, but never considered what it'd be like to actually be loved by her.

     I don't feel her kiss me. I glance down to my arms to realize that I've unconsciously stopped her from getting close enough to accomplish that.

     The steps creak loudly.

     Cassie and I both turn our heads to see Kristen standing near the stop of the basement stairs watching us in pure shock. From where Kristen stands she can't see that I still have my towel on and Cassie is still close enough to paint the worst mental picture.

     A normal reaction to two people being caught in a situation that's difficult to explain would be to break away from one another.

     Cassie tries to hold my arm and validate every suspicion . . .