Part 3- Sage Foster

Chapter 22

Kaden, I think I'm in love with you. I repeated those words over and over in my head, until I wasn't sure if I had actually said it or just thought it. It shouldn't have been easy falling for Kaden...not with everything I knew about him. He had used me twice for his own selfish gains. He was a criminal and the kind of boy I had been warned to stay away from; the Heartbreaker who would enjoy trampling all over my heart.

But I had fallen, and there was nothing I could do. I had fallen right by his feet and the only thing that would satisfy my heart was being close to him. But ever since we awoke after a peaceful night of sleep together, he seemed to be avoiding me. His eyes were everywhere, purposely sliding over me like I didn't exist.

I feebly smiled at him, trying to catch his attention, but I averted my eyes quickly when I realised someone might catch me staring.

"Hey." Derek sat down next to me. I wasn't sure what Aaron had told Derek about the gang, but it was safe to assume Derek had no idea about the criminal activities that this band of delinquents were engaged in, I don't think he'd stick around if he knew.

"Hi," I replied.

Derek had gotten more adventurous with his attire. He was dressed in a blue v-neck shirt with purple and white striped pants. On top of that he had decided to get a piercing, and now a silver hoop hung from his left ear lobe. I guess Aaron was rubbing off on him. His dreadlocks hung over his forehead and looked like it was obscuring his vision. He looked more comfortable than I had ever seen him. I was happy that he had found Aaron, and the two of them looked like they were made for each other. Aaron never missed a chance to hold Derek's hand or kiss his cheek. It was little things like that that made their relationship perfect. It was like a puzzle, all the little pieces coming together to form something spectacular.

"I think you should call Ryan," Derek suggested. "It's been too much for him, losing Calum and now you."

My breath caught in my chest when Calum was mentioned. I remembered the look in his eyes when he was killed and the life was leaving his body. The memory was gruesome and not at all something I'd like to remember. But something like that was not something one can forget, especially since I had been the one who killed him. It was a haunting memory that brought tears to my eyes.

"Sage?" Derek awkwardly wrapped an arm around my shoulder.

"What did you do to her?" Kaden was furious as he walked towards us from across the room. He examined my tearful face and held out a hand towards me.

I dried my tears. "It wasn't him." I shook my head, trying to push the picture of Calum's lifeless body out of my head. I looked up at Kaden, worry evident on his gorgeous face. I shook Derek's hand away; a murderer didn't deserve this kind of comfort from anyone, especially not her victim's best friend.

I stood up and watched Kaden's outstretched hand fall to his side. He was wearing an army-coloured T-shirt with a hole in the shoulder. I couldn't help but stare at the hole, at the tiny bit of bronzed skin that was visible under it. His skin looked flawless; an inaccurate representation of how much he had suffered. I wanted to know how he had gotten those scars, but I wouldn't press him. He would tell me eventually... I knew he would.

"You okay?" Kaden grabbed my upper arm as I tried to walk past him.

"Yeah," I responded. "I just need some air." Wrong thing to say, that's what everyone says when they're not okay.

I pried my arm free from Kaden's grasp and smiled weakly at him as I passed. I had spent so much time trying to get his attention; and when I did get his attention, I wanted to be alone.

***

Autumn was moving in fast. The leaves turned golden brown and pirouetted as they fell. The sun was high in the sky, but the chill in the air still sent goose bumps up my arms. The hairs on my arm stood upright and swayed gently to and fro, like people swaying to slow music in a packed ballroom.

I shivered uncomfortably and ran the palms of my hands up and down my bare arms. I was wearing one of Emma's tank tops. I was one of those girls that didn't feel comfortable showing my shoulders, it just seemed wrong somehow. But tank tops seemed to be the only thing of Emma's that covered most of me. Her clothes consisted of crop tops and low hanging blouses. I wondered how she survived in winter. I wondered how I would survive in winter. Usually, I bundled myself up in multiple layers until I looked like an Eskimo. Winters in Croydon were anything but mild. The roads became covered in a thick layer of ice, until the salt truck came and spread salt over the roads to make the ice melt. The thought of Winter only made me colder, so I started picturing Summer. But the sight of yellow beaches reminded me of Calum's fair hair and then I was just gloomy. So I closed my eyes and pictured an empty black void filled with nothing.

I heard a soft rustle as someone sat down on the grass next to me. Whoever it was wasn't feeling as cold as I was, because they took their jacket off and wrapped it around my shoulders.

My first thought was Kaden, but it couldn't have been him. The parka didn't smell like him. Kaden smelt like cinnamon and vanilla; this smell was more minty, like toothpaste, only more natural.

I opened my eyes gently and took in the man next to me. He was broad shouldered and wore a short sleeve grey shirt. Did no one feel cold in this place?

Flynn smiled at me, and I noticed that he had a nice smile. Not seductive like Kaden's smile, but nice in a gentle way. There was a hint of a stubble on his chin, tinged slightly grey. His fair hair stuck out in many places, in a carefree manner. He seemed to be the kind of person you could never really know. There would always something new to learn about him. He seemed like a very secretive person who would get to know other people without ever volunteering information about himself.

"Thank you," I said, pulling than parka tighter around me. It was big for me, but that provided more room for warmth. I smiled when the cold was cut off from my body.

"You're welcome," he responded. "Can I ask why you're outside in this weather?"

I shook my head. "I could ask you the same question."

"You could," he nodded. "And if you did, which you didn't by the way, I would have to say that I came out here to comfort you."

"Really?" I asked.

"No," he confessed, with a sigh. "I was walking and saw you here. So I decided to try my hand at consoling, which I've never tried before. Emma doesn't like anyone to see her cry, and Holden and Aaron never cry."

"What about Kaden?" I asked, wondering why he had been left out.

"Kaden," Flynn started, and then stopped as if he was thinking of what to say. "Kaden bottles everything up. He doesn't talk about how he feels. He's ..." Flynn stopped short, as if he couldn't find the right word.

"Insecure," I filled in for him.

Flynn's forehead creased. "How did you know that?"

"Am I not supposed to?" I enquired.

Flynn shook his head. "I'm surprised he told you about his past."

I didn't say anything, hoping that Flynn would keep talking and I could piece together bits of Kaden's past.

"I didn't tell her." A new voice joined our conversation. "I was too irresistible, and she was missing me so much that she barged into my room while I was changing."

I hid my face from Kaden, as blood flowed to my cheeks. "You weren't changing," I defended myself. "You were working out."

"Huh." He put his index finger on his chin, acting like he was deep in thought. "I don't see how that helps your case," he finally replied, with a smirk.

"I..." I stuttered like I always did when an uncomfortable subject was broached.

"Well, I'll leave you two to it." Flynn brushed his hands on his jeans as he stood up. He turned around to look at us, before telling us, "You two make a cute couple."

"We're not dating," Kaden said, looking to me for clarification. He looked like he was trying to convince himself, instead of convincing Flynn.

"Really?" Flynn raised his eyebrows. "Because from what I've heard from Aaron, you," he gestured towards me and Kaden, "were cuddling all night."

Kaden opened his mouth to say something and then closed it again and watched the back of Flynn's head as he disappeared inside.

"We're not dating?" I asked him. "I literally confessed my love for you."

"No," he protested. "Your exact words were Kaden I think I'm in love with you. Think being the keyword in that sentence."

"Well, if I were to take the think out?" I asked, not bothering to hide my red cheeks anymore.

He shrugged. "I guess we'll know when you take it out." He must have been pretty confident, since he said when and not if. "So, are you taking it out?" he continued.

I shook my head. He loved me, I knew he did. He couldn't kiss me the way he had if he didn't. Why should I confess my love first? Well, technically I had confessed first. But why should I confess it first for the second time? My own thoughts were beginning to confuse me, but I was beyond caring.

Kaden was starting to make me uncomfortable. Probably because he was still standing. He towered over me when we were both standing, so it was worse when I was sitting and he was standing. I pulled my knees to my chest and hugged them, rocking uneasily.

I started counting the strands of grass, just to have something to do, but I didn't get very far before Kaden resumed the conversation.

"Who's Ryan?" Kaden enquired, still not bothering to sit down.

"Does it matter?"

"Yes," Kaden responded and crossed his arms over his torso, "it does."

"He's a friend." I smiled, when I realised Kaden was jealous.

"A friend?" Kaden repeated, not believing my words. "A friend who gets a smile every time you think about him." I wasn't sure if he was angry; he didn't sound like it, but his hands were balled into fists and his jaw was clenched.

"The smile wasn't for him," I replied, jutting my bottom lip out. Kaden's green eyes gave away nothing about how he was feeling.

I stood up slowly, because the balls of my feet had pins and needles. I looped my pinkie finger around one of his belt loops and pulled him closer. I then planted a kiss dangerously close to his mouth. When had I become so brazen?

I looked from under my eyelashes and took a step back when I saw that his face was tilted towards mine. I wanted to kiss him, but teasing him would be a lot more fun. His eyes were closed, so he didn't realise I had moved away until he reached out to grab my body.

I giggled when his nose scrunched in confusion, and dodged past him, running to get inside.

The short run left me breathless, but it warmed me; which is why I didn't realise the jacket Flynn had given me had slipped off my shoulders and was now hanging loosely off the lower portion of both my arms.

Kaden came up behind me and I felt his hot breath on my neck as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Never do that again," he threatened.

"Or what?" I enquired, batting my eyelashes.

He didn't reply. Instead he put his lips on my neck and trailed his lips over the curve of my shoulder blade. He kissed my bare shoulder, and his fingers began to fiddle with the thin strap of my tank top. His fingertips were cold, but they radiated a feeling of warmth.

"Dude, please." Aaron ruined our moment with a groan. "Can't you undress her in your room instead of at the door?"

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