i miss it.
i miss the rush, the heat,
the imagination of cold toes
tucked between feet.
i miss watching streetlights
and imagining you on the street,
looking up at the window.
i miss the thought of kisses
in rain, in snow, in wind.
i miss wondering how it would
feel to have my hand between
your palms, pulled along
down roads that throng
with quiet, thoughtful people.
i miss the fact i had no chance
to hurt with you, to laugh
with you, to love with you.
i miss that the words left behind
never got said, instead i
choked out some half-hearted
lines template from some
other kind of thought.
i miss the rush that accompanied
the very thought of you,
now replaced with the hue
of some strange, voiceless pain.
i miss it all, and yet,
nothing changed, right?
because i still have all that
i ever had. all that i miss is
just like the pennies i throw
into those bottomless wells
with the echoing walls,
swallowing every wish i had.
i miss the future we might have had,
had the dice fallen differently.
i miss wondering how i'd feel
if we were together.
i miss it so much, but it's okay.
i know i won't miss it forever.