if you asked me,
which you never will,
about how it feels to fall in love,
i would never tell you.
i wouldn't really know how.
in my head,
maybe i'd come up with a
metaphor about
how it's sort of like
walking blindfolded down
a staircase without
even realising; without
even really knowing you're
moving at all
and you'd stop if you did,
or maybe you think
'whatever's at the bottom
won't be so bad'
(though neither of us believe you),
and either way
you still descend
in a strange mix of
knowing and not-knowing
and not knowing you've
forced yourself not to know,
until you somehow know that
whatever is outside the blindfold
is as dark as what's within.

if you asked me,
which you never will,
about how it feels to
realise you've fallen in love,
i'd say it's like missing a step
on a staircase you didn't
know you were on.