Lily clapped her hands, summoning everyone to their seats in the backyard. The hastily assembled group of "guests" looked confused, fidgeting in their chairs. Ash whispered to Misty, "What is even happening?" Misty elbowed him and shushed him, though she looked equally bewildered.

May and Drew stood awkwardly at the makeshift altar—a repurposed picnic table draped with white sheets and sprinkled with plastic flower petals. Tessa acted as the flower girl, tossing petals every which way with reckless abandon, while Lily, the self-appointed officiant, adjusted her "robe," which was really one of Mary’s oversized bathrobes.

“All right, everyone, settle down!” Lily declared, her voice filled with the authority only a ten-year-old could muster. “We are gathered here today to join Aunt May and Uncle Drew in holy matrimony!”

“Holy what?” Drew muttered under his breath, earning a sharp glare from Lily.

“Shh!” May hissed at him. “Just...go along with it.”

Lily cleared her throat dramatically. “Now, before we begin, we’ll start with the vows. Uncle Drew, you go first.”

Drew froze. “Wait, what? Why me?”

“Because I said so,” Lily snapped, shoving a crumpled piece of paper into his hands. “Now read it. With feeling.”

Drew glanced at the paper, his face paling. “You wrote this?!” he hissed, his voice a mix of panic and disbelief.

“Yes, and you’d better make it sound real, or else…” Lily trailed off ominously, her gaze narrowing. “Do you really want to know what else?”

Drew gulped. “Fine.”

He looked up at May, his green eyes wide with discomfort, and began to read. “May,” he started, his voice strained, “from the moment I met you, my life has been brighter. Your smile is like sunshine breaking through the clouds, and your laugh is the melody that plays in my heart.”

May’s jaw dropped. “What?!”

“Shh!” Lily snapped again. “Keep going, Uncle Drew.”

Drew sighed and continued. “You are the wind beneath my wings, the peanut butter to my jelly, and the ketchup to my fries. I never knew what love was until I met you.”

By this point, Drew’s face was burning a deep red, and May looked like she wanted to sink into the ground. Behind them, Ash had buried his face in his hands, while Misty muttered, “Oh no, this is so bad.”

“Good job, Uncle Drew!” Lily said, beaming. “Your turn, Aunt May!”

May hesitated as Lily handed her an equally crumpled sheet. “Do I have to?” she asked weakly.

“Yes,” Lily said, her voice brooking no argument. “Or I’ll make it worse.”

“What could be worse than this?” May mumbled before glancing at the paper. Her eyes widened. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Nope. Read.”

Taking a deep breath, May reluctantly began. “Drew, you are the sparkle in my sky and the rhythm of my soul. Your charm is unmatched, your confidence inspiring, and your hair… well, it’s always perfect.”

“Hey, I do have great hair,” Drew muttered, smirking slightly despite himself.

“Don’t interrupt!” Lily snapped. “Go on, Aunt May.”

May rolled her eyes but kept reading. “I never thought I’d find someone who completes me the way you do. You’re my partner, my rival, and my best friend. And today, I promise to love and cherish you forever.”

She folded the paper quickly, glaring at Lily. “Happy now?”

“Not yet,” Lily said, stepping forward. “Now comes the best part. Uncle Drew, Aunt May… you may kiss.”

Both of them froze. “Excuse me?!” they said in unison.

“You heard me.” Lily crossed her arms, her expression one of unyielding authority. “If you two don’t kiss, I’ll make Aunt May pregnant, and you will be the dad, Uncle Drew.”

Misty and Ash visibly recoiled. “What is wrong with this kid?” Misty whispered in horror.

“You don’t want to know,” Ash replied, looking pale.

Drew and May exchanged panicked looks. “Okay, fine!” May hissed. “Let’s just get it over with.”

“Yeah, quick and painless,” Drew muttered.

They leaned toward each other, their faces twisted in identical expressions of reluctance. Their lips met briefly, and they immediately jumped back, both grimacing like they’d just swallowed something sour.

“There!” Drew exclaimed, wiping his mouth dramatically. “Happy now?”

Lily gave them a critical look. “That’ll do… for now.”

May sighed in relief, muttering, “I need to have a serious talk with Mary after this.”

Behind them, Tessa clapped her hands. “Yay! Aunt May and Uncle Drew are married now!”

“Somebody get me out of here,” May mumbled under her breath as Drew nodded in fervent agreement.

May and Drew barely had a moment to recover from the forced wedding before Tessa came bounding forward, holding something bundled in a soft pink blanket. “Aunt May! Uncle Drew! Look what we have!” Tessa squealed excitedly.

Before either of them could process what was happening, Lily strode over, took the bundle, and handed it to Drew. “Here, Uncle Drew. Open it.”

Drew hesitated, holding the bundle at arm’s length like it might explode. “What is this? Another prank? A cake? Please tell me it’s a cake.”

“Just open it!” Lily said impatiently, tapping her foot.

Drew sighed and carefully pulled the blanket back. His breath caught, and his green eyes went wide. Nestled inside was a baby—a real, live baby. She had soft brown hair like May’s, big, round eyes with one green and one blue, and the tiniest button nose. The baby blinked up at him, cooing softly.

“What the… May, are you seeing this?” Drew asked, his voice cracking.

May stepped closer, peering over his shoulder. Her jaw dropped. “What is… How is this…” She shook her head as if trying to clear it. “Lily, what is this?”

Lily grinned, her hands on her hips. “Meet your baby daughter! I went into the future and brought her here for you!”

Both May and Drew stared at her, stunned. “Our what?!” they yelled in unison.

“You heard me,” Lily said matter-of-factly. “This is your kid. Isn’t she cute? She looks just like both of you!”

Drew looked down at the baby, who reached up with tiny fingers and grabbed a lock of his hair. “Uh… she’s definitely cute, but…” He turned to May. “Did you have a baby without telling me?”

“Of course not!” May snapped, flailing her arms. “This is insane! Lily, how—”

Lily rolled her eyes. “It’s simple. I used my time machine.”

“Time machine?” May echoed, her voice rising in disbelief.

“Yes,” Lily said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I went into the future, found her, and brought her back so you could start your family early!”

Drew’s eye twitched. “You… went into the future.”

“Yes.”

“And you… stole a baby?”

“I didn’t steal her!” Lily said indignantly. “She’s your daughter, so she belongs with you!”

May pinched the bridge of her nose, her patience rapidly dwindling. “Lily, this is ridiculous! You can’t just—”

“Oh, and by the way,” Lily interrupted, “her name is Melody. Isn’t it perfect?”

“Melody?” Drew repeated, looking down at the baby, who was now gurgling happily. Despite himself, a small smile tugged at his lips. “Okay, that’s actually kind of a cute name…”

“Drew!” May snapped, glaring at him.

“What? It is!”

“Don’t encourage her!”

Lily clapped her hands. “Well, I’ll leave you two to bond with your daughter. Have fun!” She turned and walked away, dragging Tessa with her.

“Wait, Lily!” May shouted after her. “You can’t just—”

“Bye, Mommy and Daddy!” Tessa called cheerfully over her shoulder.

May turned back to Drew, her eyes wide with panic. “What are we supposed to do with her?”

Drew looked down at the baby, who was now playing with his tie. “Well… I guess we take care of her?”

May groaned, rubbing her temples. “This is not how I planned my day…”

“Welcome to parenthood,” Drew said dryly, though he couldn’t help the small, fond smile creeping across his face as Melody grabbed his finger and squeezed.