" Add three cups of water to the pancakes." Siri's robotic voice directed.

Ash shrugged. " Whatever you say."

He put the water into the bowl and Misty mixed.

" Next add one cup of salsa.". Siri said

Ash blinked. " Uh... Okay?"

Misty blinked. " Salsa?*

Ash shrugged. " Siri asked for it."

Misty sighed. " Okay okay fine."

" Next some mayo."

Misty blinked. " MAYO?!"

" yes." Siri's annoying robotic voice directed. " It is a vital part of this recipie."

Misty shrugged. " Eh. Works for me."

" One cup of Mayo."

" Two cups of Wasabi."

" Some coffee."

" But we can't have coffee, Siri." Ash said, blinking. * We're only ten."

" I don't care."

Misty looked at the phone. " That thing has an attitude."

Ash shrugged. " Everything I get has an attitude."

Misty blushed slightly.

Everything.

Ash cleared his throat. " Anyway...."

" A pinch of salt."

" Vinegar."

" Now add some chips."

" Chips?!" Misty exclaimed. " We don't have any!"

" The alternative is a boyfriend."

Misty blushed. " I'm not doing anything to MY Ash, thank you very much."

" Then move your lazy bodies and get some chips!*

Ash groaned, slamming the spoon down into the greenish sludge they were calling “batter.” “Okay, that’s it. Misty, why are we even listening to this stupid phone?”

Misty crossed her arms, glaring at the screen. “Because someone trusted it in the first place!”

“Hey!” Ash protested. “You were the one mixing salsa and mayo like it was normal!”

Misty’s face turned red. “You said Siri knows what it’s doing!”

“Clearly, it doesn’t!” Ash shot back, holding up the spoon dripping with questionable goo. “This looks like Muk’s bathwater!”

“Excuse me,” Siri’s robotic voice interrupted. “I am still present, and I heard that.”

Misty’s eye twitched. “You know what? I don’t care anymore. Siri, you’re fired!”

“I cannot be fired. I am vital to your survival,” Siri replied smugly.

Ash blinked. “What survival? We’re just trying to make pancakes!”

“Incorrect,” Siri corrected. “You are attempting to make culinary history.”

Misty huffed. “More like culinary disaster.”

Siri ignored her. “Now, I will resume. Add three cups of pickle juice.”

Ash’s jaw dropped. “Pickle juice?!”

“We don’t even have pickle juice!” Misty exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air.

“Then you are clearly unprepared for success,” Siri replied matter-of-factly.

Ash rubbed his temples, mumbling under his breath. “This phone is evil.”

Pikachu, who had been watching quietly from the counter, finally spoke up. “Pika pika,” it chirped, clearly laughing at them.

“Not helping, Pikachu,” Ash grumbled.

Misty stomped over to the phone. “That’s it. Siri, stop the recipe. We’re done.”

“Stopping is a sign of weakness,” Siri droned. “Would you like me to search for motivational quotes?”

“NO!” Misty and Ash yelled in unison.

Siri paused. “Very well. I will now send a review of your failure to Delia Ketchum.”

Ash paled. “My mom?! Oh no, no, no—Misty, turn it off! Turn it off!”

Misty frantically tapped at the screen. “I’m trying! It’s not listening!”

“Sending review…” Siri said ominously.

Ash flung himself onto the counter, burying his face in his arms. “We’re doomed.”

Misty groaned, holding her head. “This is why I don’t trust technology. Next time, we’re doing everything by hand.”

Siri chimed one last time, sounding almost pleased. “Next time, listen to me. Have a delightful failure.”

The kitchen fell silent, save for the sound of Ash and Misty groaning in unison. Pikachu, now laughing uncontrollably, rolled onto its back.

Ash sighed. “Misty?”

“Yeah?”

“Let’s just make toast.”