Nate's being an ass towards me. One minute, he's fine. The next, he's acting like a jerk. I get it he's all stressed out lately with so much going on, but he tends to take it out on me and now, on my one day off, he ropes me into taking Julia to fill out shit so she can get her passport. I don't even agree that she should go on tour with Nate, yet here I am, spending my day off, helping her.

What I really hate is how he gets mad when I can't keep up with my  daily workload but  piles Julia shit on me and expects me to just get everything done with a smile on my face the whole time. Needless to say, I'm a bit irritated and not being the nicest towards Julia today. Paul has noticed it and nudged me a few times, but he also knows how I feel about Julia touring with Nate. Hell, there's a chance I won't be able to tour with Nate, and that kills me. This is the stuff we live for.

So to say I'm in a bad mood... yeah...

We get through the day and finally pile in to Paul's car to head home. Paul and I chat a little in the front seat while Julia is off in her own world. Probably ecstatic she will be getting her passport, and everything is aligning just perfectly for her to go  on tour and take my place.

"Paul.... Paul, don't go home." Julia blurts out of nowhere while looking behind her. Is she nuts? I'm so ready to be home. She's outta her tree.

"No, I really need to go home. I have so much shit to -"  I start, but Paul cuts me off and looks at Julia in his rearview mirror.

"How long has it been there?" He asks, now back into bodyguard mode.

"Saw it at the cafe this morning. Then at AAA, then -"

"You're just telling me this now?" He raises an eyebrow at Julia.

"You're the bodyguard, not me. Maybe if you paid more attention to your job and less on flirting with her, you'd have noticed sooner."

Is she fucking kidding me right now??!! We spent the entire day doing shit for her and she's gonna say crap like this to Paul? He shifts in his seat a little but Paul being Paul, says nothing back. 

"What are you two yapping about?" I look over at Paul who is now ignoring me and focused on the cars behind him.

"Where do you want me to go, Julia?" Paul switches lanes to see the SUV do the same. "Shit, she's right."

"Don't go to Nate's. You'll lead him right to where he lives. Go to the Marriott."

Paul nods in agreement and swerves to make the last minute turn off the exit.

"Actually, wait. That room is still a crime scene. I shouldn't be seen near the hotel, the studio. Go to the studio." I change my mind, and he switches lanes.

"Good idea."

"Bad idea. What the hell is going on? You two and your weird subliminal messages are creepy."  I turn to Julia now and see the SUV following us. It's gotta be one of Hardy's henchmen wanting more of a story. Especially with the Mila Giovanni tip of how she is all over Nate naked while filming. Anything to get a story

"Black SUV. Two cars behind us all day. Nice of you to join in, Trisha." Julia scoffs.

"What's your problem today?" I glare at her. What she should be doing is saying Thank You, not giving me a fucking attitude.

"MY problem? Absolutely nothing. But glad to see my existence is acknowledged by you. It's only been 4 hours...."

"Oh, is that what this is?!" I start, regardless that Paul suddenly looks nervous while driving. "Believe me, Moretti. Your presence has been acknowledged all right. Echoing all through the house while you and Nate -"

"TRISHA! Not the time." Paul yells and I turn back around and huff. Julia says nothing and keeps her eyes looking out the window like she needs to be instead of giving me more attitude. God if she only knew .....

"It's fine. You're fine, Julia."  Paul looks back at Julia in the mirror with sympathy. He's got to be kidding me right now. How does she wrap EVERYONE around her finger? It drives me insane. I can't take it anymore and don't care about  what happens after I say what I'm about to say now.

"I just find it funny.... You're all over Nate, yet Mila's the one going down on him."

The car falls silent. But I don't feel good about saying what I said like I thought I would. Especially when I see Julia silently cry and feel Paul glaring at me. I now wish I didn't blurt that out.

"You're a piece of work." Paul grumbles and I look out my passenger window as we pull into the studio parking lot.

The SUV whizzes by us but it has no front plates and drove too fast for any of us to catch the back plate. I swallow hard as Paul texts Nate without looking at me. Now EVERYONE is pissed off at me. Perfect.

*****

*James*

Today's visit with my sisters couldn't have gone any worse. Kendall stayed behind to watch over mom so Katie could visit me.  Ashley came with her, and Jennie is a no show, now doting over her new boyfriend that no one seems to like.

And now I know why.

"Yeah, I don't know why she is with him. I think he's a tool. I always have. I know he was your friend James, but still. I've always gotten this weird vibe from him." Ashley says while flipping through the channels on the tv in my little living room.

Wait. Who the hell is Jennie dating right now?

"You need to mind your own business is what you need to do." Katie shakes her head at her younger sister. "Jennie seems happy with Dave. Keep your weird vibes to yourself."

Dave.

Fuck.

"You remember Dave, right James? From way back when?"

I nod, feeling sick to my stomach now. I furrow my brows at her and then shake my head.

"What... He was your friend. You know who I'm talking about. Anyways, apparently, they met at the bar and reconnected. He's here for work or something but -"

I stand up and take the remote out of Ashley's hand and throw it across the room. I'm so frustrated right now and can't let my sisters know without showing them.

"What the hell, James??"

No. this can't be fucking happening.  I don't want that bastard anywhere near any of my sisters. I begin pacing the room and both girls stare at me.

"James... what's going on?"  Katie stands up and puts her hands on my shoulders to stop me. "Hey. Look at me. Was it something we said? Jennie?"

I nod frantically as a tear falls down in frustration.

"Hey, I know you're being the overprotective brother and all.." 

I push her away and shake my head. She doesn't get it! I run my fingers through my hair and continue pacing.

"I don't get what he's trying to say." Katie slumps down back on the couch. God damn it girls... pay attention!

"Ok. so Jennie. With Dave?" Ashley is on the money. I point to her and nod. Yes. Keep going, Ash. "See! James doesn't want to see Jennie with him either, do you? Something is weird with that guy." 

I clap my hand at her and nod again.

"Well, good luck trying to convince Jennie that. She's head over heals for Dave."

Oh my God. I can't take this. No.. This can't be happening. I suddenly feel like I'm gonna get sick just thinking of my sister getting involved with Trisha's ex. Especially knowing what I know and not having the ability to tell them. God, I wish Trisha were here right now. She'd get it. She could explain it all to them.

******

*Trisha*

It's Jonah to pick up Julia from the studio parking lot. And after he does, Paul reams into me.

"What the hell was that?" He stares me down without any intentions of driving.

"I'm so fucking sick and tired of this!"  I get out of the car and then run off to the side where there's grass and vomit. I start crying because I think I got sick because of what I did.. not because of the baby. I kneel down on the ground and cry. I hear the car door slam and feel Paul standing behind me.

"You'd do anything to make sure Julia's not happy, huh?" The bodyguard grumbles.

"Jealousy doesn't look good on you, Banks." I hear him walk away.

I fucked up.

God, I really fucked up.

The car ride back to my apartment is silent. Nate calls Paul on the phone having some choice words for me, making sure I hear them as I look out the window. Once home, Paul doesn't give me the time of day. Sure, he makes sure the house is safe, like always. Locks the door, like always, then heads to his room and slams the door.

I head to my bathroom and brush my teeth and cry at the same time. This is not the Trisha I'm supposed to be. No. I'm not fucking desperate, jealous, knocked up, emotional mess Trisha. I don't stoop down to the level I did tonight. I'm better than that.

"What the fuck did you do?" Nate calls me and it's the first thing he says when I answer. I slide down the bathroom wall and sit my ass on the floor.

"I'm sorry." I say softly. "I don't know what got into me."

"No. You're done Trisha. You hear me? Cancel my day tomorrow. I need to interview for a new Personal Assistant."

Nate hangs up. 

"What?" I stare at my phone. Oh my God. 

"Oh my God." I cry out and scramble to my feet. I need air. I'm having a fucking panic attack. I don't even think I can take my med for that now that I'm pregnant. I need air. I rush out of my apartment, gasping to take a breath. Not five seconds, and Paul is outside in bodyguard mode.

"Trisha. What's happening?" He glares at me, confused but still pissed at me. I gasp for air, keel over, and cry.

"Oh my God! What the hell did I do?!"

"Trisha.."

I look up at Paul, not caring if my mascara is down my face or if I'm a mess.

"He fucking fired me!"  I sob, loud enough for the whole fucking neighborhood to hear and Paul gives in and hugs me.

"Shit. I'll talk to him." He grumbles but we both know there's no point. When Nate gets something in his head, there's no changing his mind. He fired me. I had a feeling this would happen. I did it to myself.

So now not only am I fucking pregnant with a baby he doesn't want, I don't have a job, and just lost my best friend. 

"Trisha..."

"Trisha nothing! I fucked up!" I cry out but Paul pulls away from me.

"No.. Trish.. lets go!" Paul rushes back inside and grabs his keys. It's not until he points down do I feel the stabbing pain. No.... 

"OH MY GOD!" I shriek at the puddle of blood on the pavement in between my legs as the sharp pain almost knocks me down.

Then.. it does knock me down. Right down to my knees as I hold on to my stomach. Next thing I know, Paul is calling 911.

******