*Trisha*

Nate looks over at Julia while we all  absorb the news from the reporter that's standing outside the hospital.

"Shit. Turn it off, Nate." I call out from the kitchen.

"NO!" Julia retorts. "I need to know what they're saying about me." My eyes widen from her outburst.

"Jules..." Nate reaches for the remote, but Julia smacks it out of his hand, and it falls into his lap. She stares at the TV, now hyper focused.

"From the loss of her son to the loss of her husband to the loss of her NBC contract - it was only a matter of time." 

"I'm gonna get sick." Julia jumps up, and Jonah goes to her rescue, quickly running her to the bathroom.

"FUCK!" Nate picks up the remote and turns off the TV, throwing the remote across the room. The batteries fall out and roll everywhere.

"Nate..." I go and pick up the remote, putting the batteries back in. "You can't afford to lose your cool. Your heart can't handle it."

"I don't give a damn. Why can't people just leave her alone?!"

I  sit on the couch next to him and rest my hand on his shaking  knee.

"Because she's linked to you, Nate. That's why. The same reason my mug shot always pops up every few months. She's gotta learn to just go with it after awhile." I sigh.

"Trisha, she can't afford to just go with it. The state wants to put her in a place like The Avalon." Nate looks over his shoulder to make sure they are still in the bathroom while I process what he just said. Holy shit.

"I swear to fucking God you say one thing- I will fire you and I'm not kidding." He glares at me and I know he's not kidding. He's serious and I nod. "She needs to be on the top of her game before the doctor checks on her next week. Shit. She's gonna shut down now."

"What do you mean shut down??" I ask confusingly. 

"You're oblivious, aren't you?" He snaps, letting his irritability get the best of him.

"I need a FUCKING DRINK!!" Nate yells out. "Trish. I really need a drink. Just one shot. That's all I need right now." He looks over at me with pleading eyes. He's really struggling.

"Nate.. stop."

"Trisha.... please!" He whispers now. "I have to be calm for her. I can't like this."

"No.."

"Please Trish." Nate stands up. He's not supposed to stand up that fast. Before I know it, he's in the kitchen going through the cupboards. I frantically rush to him.

"Nate, what are you doing?" Jonah comes out of the bathroom, leaving Julia in there to pull herself together. 

"Where are my keys?"  Nate asks desperately while holding his stomach and looks at the table near the door where he always throws keys. They aren't in the dish. I knew this  would happen I have the keys in my purse.

"Nate... what's going on?" Jonah rushes to Nate.

"I just need to run to the store quick. I can't find my keys. Trisha, where'd you put my keys." He slouches forward in pain. 

"Hey, man. You need to slow down. You're gonna pop your stitches." Jonah reminds him.

"I don't care. Where are my keys Trisha. TELL ME!" He yells in my face and I jump. Jonah looks at me with empathy.

"He's starting the rougher stage of detox. It's not gonna be pretty. Don't take it personally." Jonah says to me. But Nate steps in closer to my face.

"TAKE IT FUCKING PERSONALLY AND GIVE ME MY FUCKING CAR KEYS!" He shouts against my face. My eyes water and I break down in front of everyone.

"I KNEW this would happen!" I cry and cover my face.

"Nate!" Julia slowly comes out of the bathroom, seeing him out of control.

"Jules..." Nate says in a more calming manner. "I just need to go for a ride. That's all. Come with me. I need to clear my head, love. Please." He pleads lovingly to her before whipping around to me and yells at me again. "Just give me my GOD DAMNED KEYS!"

He's fucking out of control.

"Nate, can I talk to you in your room? Alone?" Julia doesn't wait for an answer. She goes into his room and waits for him.

"Shit." Nate sighs. "Someone just find my keys." He grumbles and heads to the bedroom while holding on to walls for balance, then slams the door loud.

"I don't know if I can do this again." I cry and Jonah puts a hand on my shoulder.

"You've been through this before..." Jonah says instead of asks. I shake my head, and he pulls the stool out for me to sit on t the kitchen island.

"You don't have to stay, ya know. If this is too much."

"I've just never seen him like THAT." I wipe my eyes with a napkin and Jonah sits on the other stool next to me. "He's a moody sonofabitch but ...that... that wasn't Nate."

"It's only gonna get worse throughout all the different stages of detox."

"I know." God... do I know all the different stages. "It's just...he's Nate. I've known him forever. I hate seeing him like this."

Julia comes out with Nate, practically holding him up to help him walk while in pain. In the midst of all the commotion Paul comes back with his backpack and Jonah buzzes him in. He has no idea what he is walking in to. He looks at Nate's watery eyes and just nods, looking away and setting his bag down. I've always wondered what it must feel like for one grown man to see another grown man's tears. Everyone always acts so tough all the time. It was like Paul genuinely understood Nate and looked away out of respect. I get it, he's been his bodyguard since he was a kid. He must have seen Nate cry once or twice in his adult life since then.

Julia sits Nate down on the couch and picks up the remote, flipping through their faces on all the news channels until she finds his damn Golf show he wanted to watch. We all watch her calmly sit down and curl up against him, letting her head rest on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around her shoulder and I feel  heavy weight in my chest. Julia  grabs the blanket that's hanging off the side of the couch and lets Nate rest his arm around her shoulder as she sinks into him. Everyone just observes me and the now calm Nate, wondering what the hell turned it around. 

Julia then closes her eyes and starts to fall asleep in his arms like nothing fucking happened. 

Once she's  asleep, Jonah gives Nate an Ativan and checks his temp. It's still high so he gives him pain reliever in hopes to lower it. 

I lay down and curl up on the other end of the large sectional and stare at Nate who only stares at the TV. No apology. Nothing. I feel a lump of sadness caught up in my throat. I quickly flip over so I'm facing the couch so no one will see and silently cry until I start to fall asleep.

*****

*James*

I get through my shift and the first thing I do when I clock out is head to the kitchen to see Al.

"You look like shit, son." He flips a pancake  and looks over his shoulder at me while I feed my face at the small folding table. I tell him everything. Every damn thing.

"You have a lot on your plate. You know I pray for you and your family every single day still. But if you need anything, seriously. You know you can come to me." Al says while cooking on the griddle.

I nod and look down at my scrambled eggs, sending a little thank you to God for giving me this food and the people who help me through these tough times.

I saw everything on the news in the hotel lobby during my shift. I know what I'll be walking into when I get to Hollan's house. Julia probably shut down at some point and it's probably chaotic over there. I take my time eating today.

Al scrapes the griddle, and the old man slowly makes his way to me. He puts a pastry box on the folding table. It's filled with all sorts of different things from pastries to muffins to bagels.

"Here. Take this home with you."

"No, Al. I can't. Thank you though." I shake my head while wiping my mouth with a napkin.

"This stuff is only gonna get thrown out at the end of the day anyways." He nods and pats my shoulder before walking away.

I do take the box of pastries, muffins and bagels but I don't bring it home. I head to Nate's and the nurse Jonah buzzes me up.

"Jesus, it looks like a frat house in here." I look around while walking in to Nate's flat. Trisha and Paul are still asleep on separate sides of Nate's sectional couch.

"Here, compliments of the Marriott breakfast." I put the box of food on the counter for anyone who is hungry. I'm sure the last thing they want to do is cook breakfast after a long night.

"You steal from work now?" Jonah laughs, looking at all the food.

"Nah, they throw it all away at the end of breakfast anyway. I'm just saving them the trouble. Is Julia still sleeping?"

"I think she's starting to wake up. She had a rough night. They both did." The nurse informs me as I walk in to the master bedroom .I sit on the recliner and lean over so I can tuck Julia's hair behind her ears. She opens her eyes and looks up at me.

"Heyyy. " I whisper and kick off my shoes. I'm still in my Marriott polo and khaki pants since I came straight from work.

In one swift move, I slip into bed, barely on the edge and Julia moves in a little. I don't care that Nate is sleeping on the other end. I pull Julia in real close and wrap my arms around her.

"I heard you didn't have a great night." I whisper so I don't wake up Nate. I Julia shakes her head in my chest. "I saw the news on the tv at work. I'm sorry, babe, this will die down just like the last time."

She nods.

"Hey. No IV... That's a step in the right direction." I hold her hand and bring it up to my lips, kissing the black and blues left from the IV.

"Yeah, the nurse is gonna let me try going without and see how I do today." She whispers back.

"That's great news. The next few days are supposed to be nice out. Maybe I can take you out for a bit soon." I kiss her, not caring that Nate is on the other side of the same mattress we are on.

"How's America's Heart throb over there? The nurse said you both had a hard night. Is he ok?"

"Yeah, detox is taking a toll on him and he has a fever. Jonah doesn't know what it's from yet. Last night was rough after we saw the news." Julia whispers. "Hey, what happened to your arm??"

I didn't realize my sleeve rode up my arm while laying with her. The black and blues are now prominent. 

 There's a thick silence for a good minute.

"James.."

"Julia.."

"What happened? It's all black and blue.."

I swallow hard.

"I was gonna do a little food shopping before work and..." My voice cracks.

"And what?" Jules pauses. "No... your dad?" Julia throws her arms around me and embraces me. I hide my face in her hair and start to get a little emotional.

"Joe was in the next isle over at the grocery store. I had no idea." I sniff.

"He came over and asked me how the girls were. Like he fucking cares. He does it to get under my skin. When I tried to walk away without answering..."

"He grabbed your arm like he did that day I met him? That's what gave you this? Jesus Christ. All because you didn't tell him how your sisters were? He doesn't deserve to know." Julia says a little louder now, clearly upset.

"The sonofabitch was drunk in a damn supermarket. Guess those AA meetings aren't helping." I scoff at my own sentence. "He's never gonna leave me alone."

"James, there's gotta be something you can do! Can't you go to the police?"

"And what.. piss him off more? In a way I'm relieved he only goes after me now and not the girls. I can handle it. They can't. They're already dealing with too much with my mom, and Kendall, God..she'd be a mess! She wasn't around yet when we got outta there. She's not used to him.."

"So because your the only son you get to take the brunt of it? You let him mess with you to save your sisters from it? James.."

Julia starts crying. The exact reason I wasn't gonna tell her this shit.

"Hey.... no.. don't worry about me. I'm used to it. Hey.... come here."  I get off the bed and pull Julia with me to the recliner, holding her so tight.

"Other people are in the room. The room they pay rent for...in the bed they paid for..." Nate announces loudly without looking over at us, making us and apparently Jonah in the other room start laughing.

"I'm glad you all think this is so funny. The guy who opens his home to you all.." Nate sits up a little now, scratching the back of his head and messing with his hair. He hesitantly looks over thinking we are in the bed but relieved to see I was just moving us to the recliner for privacy.

"Sorry, did we wake you?" Julia looks at Nate.

"Did you hear us talking?" I ask abruptly. Please God let him say no.

"No. I just woke up. You talking about me behind my back, Gallo?" 

I exhale in a bit of relief and shake my head.

"No, well not really. I asked how you were feeling. That's all. Really.."

"I'm fine. Thanks for asking." He mumbles. "I gotta take a piss." He announces and sits up. He slowly puts on his grey joggers.

Without caring that he has fucking morning wood showing through his sweatpants, he walks past the two of us and heads to the bathroom. I exhale and shake my head. I kiss Julia a few times before she pulls away when she hears the toilet flush.

"C'mon, you should eat a little. I grabbed some stuff from the hotel." I get out of the recliner first an then help Julia out. "Did you sleep in your clothes? I can grab stuff for you later." 

We head out to the main living area. Everyone is awake now. Trisha starts making coffee. She looks perfect even though she just woke up. She smiles at me when I walk by. Nate comes out of his room and kisses Trisha forehead which I find a little odd for friends to do.

"Hey, sorry about last night." Nate says when he is behind her and puts his hands on her hips. "I mean it."

"You're fine, Playboy. Go eat ....or ...drink your Ensure .." Trisha forgives him just like that. 

What the hell was that all about? I give Julia a look but she just shakes her head. She'll tell me later.

"You can try and eat half of the blueberry muffin, Nate. But then drink the Ensure." Jonah comments from the dining room table. The table that Nate never uses. Jonah is sitting with his laptop doing something hospital related.

"Real food. Finally."

"No coffee though. Unless it's decaf." He adds.

"Sorry, Nate. I can run to the store and buy decaf later." Trisha chimes in. Paul just sits on the couch silently, trying to wake up. 

"I need to run to the hospital to grab more supplies and get you started on your prescription, Julia. Are you all gonna be here for a bit to watch over these two?" Jonah stands up and shuts his laptop.

"Yeah..." All the babysitters say at the same time. Trisha, Paul and myself... 

"Great. You eat... everything." Jonah points to Julia. "You, eat only half of that and switch to the shake." He points to Nate before he heads out.

Everyone goes their separate ways. Nate takes his half a muffin and ensure and sits on the couch. Trisha joins him with two cups of coffee, handing Paul one who nods in appreciation. Me and Julia sit at the island picking at food.

"You never texted me last night, you sure you're ok?" I ask quietly. She looks down at her bagel and takes a bite.

"Sorry. It was a bad night."

"Don't let that media shit get to you. It's not worth it, babe." I sip my coffee and rub Julia's back.

"Do you know the state can make me go into one of those homes?" Julia blurts out and catches me off guard. "They can force me by law." Her voice cracks.

"No they can't, can they?" I say too loud and everyone turns at us. Julia gets up off the stool and walks into Nate's bedroom, only drawing more attention to us. I follow behind with her food because I know she needs to finish it. We keep the door open and talk softly.

"The nurse said if I don't pull it together, the state could bring it to court and say I'm not mentally well enough to take care of myself."  She starts making Nate's bed to keep busy. "The doctor can make the final call."

"No... that can't be true, can it? I mean. You're a grown adult!" I put her food down on the nightstand and actually help her make Nate's bed. My side is messy so she rolls her eyes and fixes it, making me smirk at him. "I tried."

Julia starts pacing back and forth across the room while we talk. I sit in the recliner watching her.

"The doctor is giving me one week to pull it together. Look at me!" She throws her shaky hands out in front of me. "I'm in the middle of a fucking detox! This is the worst possible time to be tested for something like this! Maybe if I had Ativan in my system and I was calm, sure. But James...this isn't gonna end well for me. I can't go into one of those places!" She gets all worked up again.

Nate comes and stands in the doorway.

"You good in here?" He leans against the doorway. He doesn't look great. Tired, pale, shaky.

"They can't really force her in to one of those facilities, can they???" I look at Nate for more information. Nate rubs the stubble on his jaw and sees Julia upset.

"They can." He sighs and I'm  now the one to lose all the color in my face.

"But we're not gonna let that happen, right Jules? You're gonna eat, and be fine by the time they reevaluate you. I'm gonna make sure of it."

"Nate, look at me. Look at YOU!" They are both shaking a little, both in need of what they are trying to detox from. Both emotional and moody as hell.

"Maybe we'll be in the clear by then."

"And if we're not??"

I stand up and put my hands on both of her shoulders to stop her from pacing.

"You WILL be, ok? It's a week away." I wrap my arms around her and she hides her crying face. "You'll eat and sleep and do everything they need you to do. We'll both help you in any way we can."

I look at Nate and we both nod.

"Right now, you need to eat breakfast, right?" For once, I'm the one pulling away. I sit Julia down on the recliner and nod at the bagel. "I'll go get you a drink. Coffee? Orange juice?"

"Thanks James. Coffee."

"A little cream and one sugar." I recite, making her smile. Of course I remember how she takes her coffee. 

I head out to the kitchen to grab Julia a cup and glance over at Trisha who is leaning against the counter sipping tea.

"What happened last night? That he had to apologize to you for?" I whisper so they can't hear me while pouring coffee.

"Nate lost his shit." She keeps her eyes down and doesn't look at me.

"How so?"

"Just screaming in my face because he needed a fucking drink and I wouldn't help him." She shakes her head. "I know it wasn't him. It was the withdrawals. That's all." She makes light of it.

"Hey." I lean up against the counter and nudge her with my body a little so she will look up at me. Her eyes look so sad this morning. Last night must have been really bad. "You know you can always call or text me even when I'm at work if you want to talk. Right?"

"Thanks James." She smiles up and me and I give her a nod before going back into the bedroom with Julia's coffee.

Nate is trying to play his guitar in the corner of the huge bedroom but his trembling hands are preventing him. Both me and Julia notice.

"Fuck." He says and puts the instrument down. "Oh no.."  He sit up in the chair. 

"You good?" I walk over to Nate.

"I'm gonna get sick." He stands up and leans forward, holding right where the bandage is on his bare stomach.

"Wait.. You can't... he can't throw up! Jonah said he'd pop his stitches and shit!" Julia also jumps up now.

"Sorry, doll. It's happening." Nate quickly walks to the bathroom and closes the door. My eyes widen and both me and Julia head to the bathroom.

"Fuck!" Nate yells and holds on to the counter, leaning over it in pain as we both enter the bathroom. He's trying to brush his teeth in the middle of the pain he's feeling from getting sick.

"Oh no!" Julia looks in the toilet and at Nate, holding his stomach while brushing his teeth. He spits and wipes his mouth with one hand while holding my stomach with the other.

"Are you ok?? Nate...." I start but then look down at Hollan's stomach. " Shit!"  The white bandage is now turning red around where his hand is. 

"Oh my God!" Julia gasps and rushes over to him. At this point everyone hears the commotion and Trisha and Paul both come in to the bedroom to see what's going on.

"Get him to his bed!" Julia yells to me. I throw his free arm over my shoulder and help him walk out of the bathroom. Trisha sees the blood and panics, leaving the room as fast as she came in.

"What's Jonah's number? I'll call him." Paul asks. Nate nods to the nightstand drawer, and he opens it to see the paper towel. He takes it and quickly leaves the room to call the nurse. I sit Nate on the bed and sit next to him to make sure he doesn't topple over. 

"Are you in pain?" I ask and then realize how stupid of a question that is.

"No.... Of COURSE I'm in FUCKING pain!!" Nate snaps but it doesn't faze me. 

Julia kneels down in front of him with a hand towel.

"Jules, I think I popped my stitches or something. It hurt so bad when I threw up."

"Can I take a look?" Julia lifts his hand at the now red bandage. It's not bleeding through alot or anything horrific, just enough to freak him... and apparently Trish out. Julia replaces his hand with the towel and holds it there for him. She lets Nate rest his forehead on her shoulder so he can stay leaning forward.

"I shouldn't have eaten anything. I don't know if it was from that or detox. Jules, he said I can't throw up." 

"I know. He should be here soon." She puts her hand on the nape of Nate's  neck to hold me.

"He's really burning up, James.."

"Do we call a rescue?" I ask.

"NO!" Nate snaps again. "No... I can't." He says softer, realizing how harsh it came out. "We're already on the news. This'll just make things worse, mate."

"Fuck the news, Nate. This is your health." I say calmly though I'm anything but calm inside.

Julia starts crying.

"I don't know what to do." She holds on to Nate tighter. "Tell me what to do..."

Right as she says that Trisha runs into the room.

"I just buzzed the nurse in. He's on his way up." She again leaves the room as quickly as she entered.

"Oh thank God." Both me and Julia say in unison.

Jonah rushes in with a big white kit.

"Sorry it took so long, I had to turn around and get a suture kit." Jonah takes over completely now, knowing just what to do. "You really should be in a hospital setting."

"I don't fucking pay you for me to be in a hospital setting." Nate says in pain.

Both me and Julia back away to give Jonah plenty of room to do what he needs to do.

"You really like to make every day an adventure, Mr. Hollan." Jonah opens up a black bag, and I see a full bottle of Ativan. He opens the bottle and takes one of the small pills for Nate to put under his tongue.

I notice Julia's eyes. She stares at the pill bottle longer than she should.

*****