*Trisha*

With my permission, Nate tells Paul more of what's going on and decides he will be the one to pay for Paul's services. He probably heard a little from when I told James in the café, but I really don't think he was paying attention being in the next booth over and on his phone the whole time.

Paul was NOT happy.

"Listen, he was just drunk out of his mind, ok? You know he doesn't pull that shit sober." I make Nate's bed for him while talking to both Nate and Paul. They are sitting at the chairs near the windows in Nate's room, watching me keep busy while talking.

"You're seriously not making excuses for him. Are you, Trish?" Nate glares at me now. "Because you've seen me drunk plenty of fucking times and not once have I degraded you, or any woman, in any way."

"I'm not. I'm just saying... I don't worry about him when he's sober. Paul, I just need to have you in case he comes around drunk off his ass and tries something stupid. That's all."

Paul nods, understanding the assignment. He knows the job details without me needing to explain anything to him.

"Starting right now. She leaves this apartment, you go with her. Got it? Just like Julia. Don't let her out of your sight."

"You got it." Paul replies.

"Unfortunately, today might stink for you, Hot Stuff. I need to go to the courthouse and the police station to figure out if I qualify for restraining orders against Dave. If I do and he gets served, things are gonna get messy. He drinks so much now, guys. It's hard to watch."

"Do you need me to call in someone else to help watch over Julia now? I can't be two places at once, Nate. I could call Max if needed."

"Let's just see how things go. Her new meds seem to be kicking in a little. I think I can handle it. Then again, I thought I could handle Cara and look how that turned out. But I'll keep Max in mind."

"The courthouse opens in an hour. Come on, Paulie. I'll buy you a coffee on the way. Nate's treat." I ruffle up Nate's hair like a puppy. He rolls his eyes.

*****

I spend the entire day jumping through hoops, but when it was all said and done. I don't qualify for a restraining order. In the court's eyes all that happened was my ex boyfriend came over drunk a few times. I couldn't bring myself to mention the sexual stuff, so I'm stuck with Paul for a little while.

I sit outside the courthouse on the steps for a moment to breath. Paul sits next to me and stares ahead. I can tell he doesn't know what to say. I've known him forever but only as a bodyguard, not really as someone I would tell shit to. But today...today feels different.

He wasn't walking behind me as my bodyguard while I go through the motions. He was walking next to me as my friend and when I came out of the room in tears, he hugged me until I stopped crying.

I think I even felt him rest his chin on the top of my head which was nice. Weirdly, it felt TOO nice. I joke around , but never really thought of Paul in that sense. Now I'm all fucking fuck of fuck confused!

"Thanks for coming with me today." I lean back on the step and look up a little while taking another deep breath to calm down.

"It's my job."

Right... maybe I was misreading the whole friend thing.

"I know. But you could have easily said no. That you were hired to be Moretti's bodyguard and make Max take on this.

Paul laughs and I think it is probably the first time I've really noticed him laugh. To be honest, I'm not the most observant person sometimes. He puts his hands out like they are scales and teeters them from side to side when he talks. Julia in one scale, me in the other.

"Lets see. Moretti....Banks....Morretti...Banks." He weighs the two of us on his imaginary scale and I was lifted higher. "That's a no brainer, Trisha." Paul looks down at me with a slight grin.

"Yeah.... she's a mess." I huff.

"Sure is. But he loves her." Paul is the one to huff a little now. He shakes his head. "That has disaster written all over it."

"Yeah. I don't get it."

"You really don't like her do you?" The bodyguard raises an eyebrow at me, asking seriously now.

"It's not that I don't like her. Julia is just.... she's time consuming. She's got more fucking baggage than I do shoes in my closet. A shitload of drama and it's a lot." I pause. "Too much for Nate. It's just another person to take care of," I add. Paul knows about Nate's family... about his mom. About his little sister. Maybe not all the details but he knows about Cara.

"And Nate is another person for you to take care of..." Paul isn't saying this in a rude way at all. He says it to put things into perspective, and I nod. "You've always been the one to take care of him."

"I guess." I admit softly and make eye contact with Paul now as he talks.

"Just like you'd never stop taking care of him...he'll never stop taking care of her."

Yeah that stung.

Who the hell will never stop taking care of me when I need someone?

*****

Nate makes me a cup of tea and brings it over. I should be taking care o him right now, not the other way around. I sit on his couch with my head in my hands. Not crying, but frustrated and have a headache from this day. Paul looks frustrated as well. We're both tired. It was a long day.

"I can't believe there's nothing you can do." Nate hands me the cup and sits down next to me. Everyone is in the room except Julia. I don't go into detail with Paul and Jonah in the room. they don't need to know the things Dave did or said to me. It disgusts both me and Nate that someone who was once our friend, has turned into such an asshole all because of his addiction.

"I don't have any solid evidence. I need to wait for it to happen again, call the police and file a report. Until then, I just have to live my life. I don't WANT it to happen again. What a waste of a day." I let out a sigh." I never got around to loading your agenda for next week on the calendar app. I will do it tomorrow. Sorry, Nate." I apologize.

"Trish. You're not serious, are you? Don't worry about the fucking agenda."

"No. It needs to be done. Next week is the start of you getting back into the game, remember? It's a busy week full of interviews."

"It is?" I can tell anxiety just hit Nate hard and he purposely doesn't make eye contact with Jonah though Jonah is staring at him.

"It is. Remember? Richard is pushing you to get the ball rolling. I can't stall anymore. I've run out of excuses for you, Nate."

"You probably should stay here tonight." Paul says.

"Do you care, Nate?" I look over at Nate.

"You should stay here for awhile. Let things blow over with Dickhead Dave." He lowers his voice before continuing. "But if you don't mind sleeping on the couch tonight.. Julia is here. And not in good shape."

"She's here? What's the matter with her? And no. I don't care. I'd sleep on ground, for all I care. I just need a place to hide away for a bit." I tighten my ponytail and look to Paul, not caring for an answer to what's wrong with Julia. "Ok, Sexy. You're gonna have to follow me home so I can grab a few things." I stand up and pull Paul up out of his chair. He sighs and shakes his head.

"Are you sure you don't mind Nate? I can always stay at the Marriott."

"You know I never mind. Join the fricken commune here." Nate laughs a little. "Anyways, Paul would have to go with you and stay by your door. Why have him sleep in a chair when he has a bed here?"

"THANK you." Paul sighs in relief. He spends enough time sleeping outside people's doors on the 4th floor.

I grab my keys and my shadow Paul follows her out the door.

*****

*James*

[Is Julia good over there?? She's not answering my texts]

Something's up. I've texted Julia through out the day with no response. My last resort is to contact fucking Hollan.

Of course the toolbag doesn't answer. I grab my keys and head over to make sure she's good.

****

"Well look who I found." Trisha says. "He was parking his car when I pulled in."

I drop my eyes and wallet on the counter. "Does anyone answer their texts around here?" Nate can hear the irritated tone in my voice.

"Sorry, Mate. I was doing the dishes." Nate responds.

"Where's Julia?" I kook around the room.

"In the shower, I think."

I ignore everyone and head through Nate's bedroom to his shower.

"Babe, You good in there?" I knock on the door.

"Door's unlocked."

I go into the bathroom. I lean against the doorway with my right ankle over my left and fold my arms over my chest.

"Why are you ignoring me today, Miss Moretti?" I study Julia. She's in only a towel and her eyes are puffy. "Have you been crying, Julia?"

Julia turns and leans on the edge of the counter while looking at herself in the mirror.

"Do you think I'm ever going to get better?" She asks while looking at her own reflection. I stand behind her with my hands around her waist and my chin on top of her head. I look at her through the mirror while we talk. She's having a hard time right now. I can only imagine how frustrating it must be to live in her head.

"Of course I think you're gonna get better." I say softly.

"Really? Because I don't." She says with no emotion.

"What happened today, Julia?"

She huffs and instead of looking at me, she looks at herself now while she talks.

"What happened today..." She states to herself. and then glances up at me. "Am I talking to my boyfriend James or my best friend James?"

I let out a sigh and close my eyes for a second feeling defeated. I have a feeling I already know what happened and I can't hide the hurt look in my eyes. Fucking Nate gets in the way ALL THE TIME.

"Best friend James." I answer, letting out another breath. She knows this means she can tell me anything and everything and I won't get mad or judge her. How could I? She's struggling mentally really bad. It's Nate I have a problem with. He is NOT struggling mentally. What he's doing is taking advantage of Julia. Her problem is, she lets him! This woman has absolutely no self control when it comes to Hollan. She needs to just be away from him for a while. He clouds her thinking.

"First I had a panic attack from a memory. Then I cried. Next, I tried to calm myself down and laid on the bed. But got off quickly when a strand of Trisha's blond hair was on my pillow. Then I cried." She says dryly with no emotion in her words.

"Jesus." I squeeze my arms around her waist a little tighter while continuing to keep my eyes on hers through the mirror.

"Next I shut down in the living room. Then I cried." She pauses and her lip unintentionally quivers.

"Next I slept with Nate. Then I cried more."

I swallow hard and give her a slight nod, taking a deep breath and exhaling sharply.

"Ok." I whisper.

"Nate fucking tells me he wanted me to have his last name and all this shit about loving me."

What????!!!!

"And I lock myself in the bathroom and shut down. I cried myself to sleep on the bathroom floor." Tears stream down Julia's face and I feel my own eyes start to water from her words.

"Then I have nightmares. The first time Luke went on a "Business trip to Chicago" When he really spent three days in our favorite hotel fucking Nicole."

"Julia..." I try to turn her around to comfort her but she shakes her head and continues to look at her own reflection while talking.

"Wait. I'm not done. The day's not over. After I write everything down I go into shock or something."

"Next, I hear Nate and Jonah talking about how fucked up I am in the head. After that, I lay in bed all day. Sleeping, remembering shit...crying...and writing it down in the journal. I write it all down for everyone to read and pity me. You can read it if you want. I can't talk about it though."

"And now, here I am... sobbing... feeling like my depression is getting worse, feeling all alone, and telling my best friend how I hurt my boyfriend and all the bad things about this day. Telling him about the bad person I am."

"You're not a bad person." I turn her around now and embrace her while she cries. Today was a disaster. "Sshhh, it's ok, babe. I'm right here with you. You're not alone." While holding Julia I kick the door shut and lower us to the ground. I lean against the back of the door and place her in my lap, making sire her towel is covering all of her, while she cries in my chest. I rock her a little and kiss the top of her head.

I don't say another thing. She's said enough. I let her cry like she needs and it breaks me. Tears start building up in my own eyes. Julia cries so damn hard and for so long she cries herself to sleep on my lap.

When I notice she has fallen asleep, I pray over her. She needs to get out of this house. She to be around other people besides those in this house. She fucking needs group counseling and her own life, not near Nate.

I slowly get up and walk out of the bathroom, holding sleeping Julia in my arms. Nate is in the room and I glare at him, not caring that it's obvious I've been crying. Whatever.

Nate swallows hard and watches me lay Julia on the bed. He says nothing but quickly rummages through one of the dresser drawers to find a T- shirt, underwear and Pajama pants. He places them on the bed and looks away, walking to where the two oversized chairs are near the balcony window. He keeps his back turned and leans his arms up on the window, looking out at the view of L.A.

"You're an awful piece of shit for a human being." I say while getting Julia dressed. I don't raise my voice. I say it calmly because I know it affects him more that way.

"I know." Nate says with his back still facing me and drops his head.