*James*

"What's going on with you?" Jonah walks by Julia. She's lying on my lap on the couch with a headache.

"Just a little headache." She downplays it. I can tell. 

"Let's get some ibuprofen going. You need to feel ok for your virtual counseling session later." Jonah pivots and heads to go get meds. 

"I really don't feel good." She whispers to me, and I look down at her with concern. "Don't tell him. He'll blow everything out of proportion."

"What doesn't feel good, babe. Just your head?"

She shakes her head, and out of nowhere, her eyes start to water. She's in real pain.

"My whole body hurts. My bones hurt. Everything hurts." She whispers as tears fall down. She wipes them quickly when we hear the nurse come back in.

Jonah's not stupid. He catches on right away.

"More than a headache, huh?" He puts two ibuprofen in her shaky hand and gives her a water bottle.

"No. I'm good." Julia lies.

"Julia, you're an awful liar, you know that? I can tell you are in more pain than just a little headache. One - Your pupils are dilated. It's a defensive reaction. Two - you're looking clammy. You can't fool me. Just be honest."

"My whole body hurts." She gives in, and Jonah nods, understanding.

"C'mon. Let's get you to bed. I'll check your vitals and then make some soup for you." He takes her hand, and she lifts her head off me. The minute she stands up, she holds her head and leans forward from the pain.

"Shit." Julia says and closes her eyes.

"What's going on?" I jump up and take her other hand.

"I don't know. The pain in my head... I don't usually get headaches. Not like this. And the light.. Shit." She covers  her eyes from the light.

"You're getting a migraine." Jonah knows the signs right away.

"But I don't get headaches."

"You do now. Could be the withdrawals or the antidepressants. It's hard to tell. Get her in bed and close the curtains. I'll get a cool compress for the back of her neck."

Nate sits up the minute I walk in, slowly escorting Julia into the room. She doesn't look good...at all.

"What's the matter, Jules?"

"Crap. I'm gonna get sick." She ignores Nate and looks at me.

"Ok, ok. C'mon." I rush her to the bathroom and close the door behind us. She gets sick in the toilet and cries like she always does when she throws up. I hold her hair away from her face and do whatever she needs  and then help her wash up.

I open the bathroom door and help Julia back to bed.

"Hate to crash your party, but I need to lay down." Julia gets under the covers and rolls over to her side facing me, curling up into her usual ball.

"Here. Jonah said, put this on the back of her neck. I'll go get her a Gatorade." Nate gets out of the bed and hands me  the wet cloth before leaving the room.

It only took five minutes.

Five minutes for Julia to switch moods.

Five minutes for her to freak out.

I put the wet washcloth on the back of her neck like they said, and she immediately grabs it and forcefully throws it across the room.

"Babe, what's the matter?"

"I don't want the fucking thing!" Julia yells out of nowhere, catching me completely off guard. "It's not gonna help!"

"Ok.." It's all I say. Nate walks back into the room while Julia is flipping out, loud enough for Jonah to have to go into another room while on hold with the counselor's office.

"James, just go!" She yells from the same curled up position. Nate looks at me with wide eyes. I stand up and shake my head.

"Apparently, she doesn't want the cool compress." I say softly looking at the cloth thrown clear across the room.

"James. Leave!" Julia covers her face with her arms, so I quietly leave the room. Then quietly leave the apartment all together.

*****

*Trisha*

"I didn't have a choice, so I had to reschedule your appointment. She can meet with you virtually tomorrow afternoon. She's pretty open." Jonah hands Julia her meds while she sits at the kitchen island.. Nate plops down on the couch with his weighted blanket, looking a little irritated.

I'm making dinner for everyone...again.. and try not to pay attention to Julia who's now sitting right in front of me. The way she has a hold on both James and Nate bugs me so I try not to be around her so I don't say anything I'll regret later.

"Where's James?" Julia asks Jonah, who steals a piece of bread and sticks it in the pasta sauce, earning his hand a slap. He smirks at me and shoves the bread in his mouth. 

"He's home taking care of his dog. Cute thing. You should see it, Nate." Jonah says.

"Not happening." Nate yells while flipping through the channels on tv.

"You got to see Maggie?" Julia raises her eyebrows.

"She was in his car. I couldn't resist going down to see her. She's cute. She'd be an excellent therapy dog, actually..." Jonah looks towards Nate, who repeats himself.

"Not fucking happening."

"She really is a great therapy dog. She's good for him."

"That's right. Nate mentioned he lost a child a long time ago." Jonah doesn't think much of it, but  I see Julia's face redden.

"You told him? Was that ok to do??"

"It was awhile ago. I don't know. Please, everyone knows about Boston, he's not gonna care if someone knows about his shit. Everyone knows everybody's shit round here."

I drop the wooden spoon on the ground and jump from Nate's words. It was noticed by everyone. Why the hell would he drag me into this? All I'm trying to do is fucking make dinner for everyone!

Julia quickly gets up and heads to the balcony. Nate rolls his eyes.

"You pissed her off again, Playboy." I wave the wooden spoon at Nate and smirk.

"Don't you have date with Paul or something??" Nate retorts and heads outside. Nice Nate...real nice.

Not five minutes later Julia runs back inside to go puke in the bathroom. Just fucking lovely. Here comes HER detox now. Jonah quickly follows to help Julia out. The second I hear her getting sick I feel nauseous. 

"Yep. That's my cue. I'm out!" I grab my keys. 

Nate knows I can't handle that shit.

*****

*James* 

I texted Trisha for an update on the "Detox Compound" before heading over. She left before dinner because Julia started throwing up. Trisha can't handle that shit. So, I head back over and end up falling asleep on the couch when Julia wanted nothing to do with me. I constantly question if I did the right thing by not letting her get admitted. She's a mess right now. But I love her and am trying to help her get through this stage. It's not easy.

It's the middle of the night and I wake up to hearing Julia cry and Nate and Jonah trying to help. Paul is still sleeping.

I head to the bedroom to see if everything is ok and close the door behind me so we don't wake up Paul. Jonah is on the edge of the bed holding Julia to calm her down when they see me come in.

"Holy shit, man." Jonah blurts out.

"What?" Both Jonah and Nate are staring at me. Right. I am shirtless. They see my tattoos.

"What? What?!!.... You have the damn Crusader's Cross from Jerusalem on your back. Unsure if you're aware...." Jonah blurts out again while holding Julia who seems to be in shock of some sort. We both look at Jonah confused making him explain further. "It's like the biggest cross in the world, is that what you were going for cuz you succeeded, my friend."

"I like ink." That's all I say, and Nate shakes his head at me when I don't go into more detail. I pay no attention to them and sit on the recliner, giving Julia all my attention now. Why is she so still?" I grab her hand, but she doesn't flinch. 

"She's in shock. It's common but never seen her go into shock over a dream like this. Did she say what was going on?" Jonah turns to Nate, still holding Julia in his arms. Julia who is completely unresponsive to any of us in the room.

"I don't think this was about her son. I don't know. This was different."

Jonah gives Nate a nod. "She shut down on me yesterday. She couldn't talk about it. She just said she's starting to remember things. Things she pushed down for awhile. Shit's resurfacing now that she's on meds and going through therapy. I can't tell if it's a good thing or bad but it needs to happen for her to heal."

"She was weird this afternoon too." Nate admits.

"Oh my God." Julia whimpers and snaps out of it, now sobbing in Jonah's arms. He looks uncomfortable holding her now and backs away, pretty much pushing her on to Nate instead who of course, wraps his arms around Julia. Jonah stands up and we switch seats so I sit on Nate's bed and Jonah sits on the recliner.

"I'll go get her a water." Jonah fucking leaves the room. 

"Hey.." I look down at Julia who is being held by fucking Nate. She looks at me and straightens up a little, as does Nate. He lets go of her and she shifts over to me and hides her face in my chest. Nate quickly scrambles to his side of the bed and lays back down.

"Do you remember what you were dreaming?"

Julia doesn't budge on information.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake the whole house up. I'm sorry, Nate." Julia turns to Nate who is obviously tired and pissed now.

"Be sorry after you get him out of my bed. Then show me how sorry you are, doll." Nate says behind his arms, making her laugh a little.

"Aww does this bother you, Mr. Hollan?" She kisses me on the cheek, and I smirk a little, knowing she's causing trouble. She's all over the place.

"Very much so."

"I already told ya, babe. No throuples." I tease, just to get under Nate's skin.

"Aww c'mon. Even if it's the multimillion dollar celebrity Nate Hollan??" Julia says in a sing songy voice.

"Julia. Shut the hell up." Nate folds the pillow over both ears and turns to lay on his side, shutting off his lamp on that side of the room.

"I mean...if the price is right..." I laugh. I can almost feel Nate tense up.

"Get the fuck off my bed, Gallo." Nate demands.

"Alright. Alright, I'm kidding." I give Julia a little wink and get off the bed but then lean in to kiss her. Nate thinks I'm officially off the bed and sitting on the recliner when he rolls back over. Instead, he sees me hovering over Julia deep in our kiss.

"Bloody hell. I'm investing in a squirt gun to hose you two down. One of those big super soakers." Nate pulls the covers over his head.

Just to tease him more, Julia breaks her kiss with me to tease Nate more. She ticks her chin up and raises an  eyebrow at me for a quick second. But I sternly shake my head no. Regardless, she crawls under the covers and scoot over to Nate. She's not serious, is she?

"Awww. Are we jealous Mr. Hollan???"

What the hell is she doing? Julia presses her entire body against Nate's and pulls the covers over her head. I feel heat rise to my face and the jealousy takes over.

"You too. Get out of my bed. I mean it, Jules. Stop." 

"Alright, babe. You're not funny." I stand up and huff.

"Stop. Julia..." Nate pulls the covers down and pushes her away.

"It was awful." Julia lays on her stomach and steals Nate's pillow, burying her face in it. "It was so awful."

What the hell is happening? Neither me nor Nate can keep up with her mood swings now.

Nate sits up and looks at me. I shake my head and sit back down on the recliner, both of us not really knowing what's happening. She's a mess. 

"What was awful, babe?" I ask.

"Everything. It was all a lie. I should have believed her. I don't know why it's all coming back to me now." She says into the pillow and shakes her head.

"Believe who? Jule. We don't know what you're talking about, love." Nate is just as confused as I am.

"That day." Julia sits up and gets out of the bed fast. Both me and Nate watch her pace around the room. Her body is shaking from detox while she talks out loud. Not to us. It's like she is talking to herself. Jonah comes back in with a few water bottles and gives us all a strange look, staying clear of Julia's path. He puts the waters on the night stand and walks over to one of the corner chairs. 

Julia shakes her hands like she just washed them and ran out of paper towels, while in her trance, pacing and talking to herself. We all stare at her and listen, trying to process it and put the pieces together. It's like she's having some breakthrough. Or breakdown. None of us are sure which one .

"I should have known." Julia tells herself. "She was trying to tell me. I didn't want to believe her. I ...I couldn't..." Julia shakes her head and cries now, still shaking her hands and pacing.

"It was the worst fucking timing, Jonah!" She stops and stares at him, catching us all off guard. She trusts the nurse. Julia looks away and continues in her trance. "His briefcase was RIGHT there! She showed me!!"

Julia covers her eyes with one hand and sobs, crashing down on her knees so hard I swear she could have broken both kneecaps. But it doesn't phase her. She hurls over and sobs so fucking hard I feel like my heart is being ripped out. Both me and Nate glare at Jonah with pleading eyes, subliminally asking what to do to help her. He shakes his head no.

"Only thing that would help this kind of panic is an anxiety med. I can't give her Ativan. You KNOW I can't. She has to deal without it." He whispers over her so we can hear. Paul is now in the  room. 

But Paul doesn't stay. He groggily asks if we need him. We ALL blurt out no and he heads back to bed, waving all our sorry asses off.

"Julia. Who was trying to tell you something? Who's briefcase??" Jonah hesitantly pushes the envelope more, hoping to either stir Julia out of her mania or get more info from her episode.

She jumps back up to her feet. "I need to go back to forgetting this. What the hell did you make me do!?! Jonah, I need to go back to forgetting this!!!"

Julia is out of her trance, standing, now begging Jonah for help. He only shakes his head while he sits there with wide eyes, not sure what to do.

"Please! Take me off the meds. Stop the therapy. Do SOMETHING!!! I don't want to remember this!!!"

The emotion overcomes me and my eyes water. None of us have ever seen her like this.

"I can't watch this. Figure it out Jonah. This isn't normal." I storm out of the room holding in my emotion until the door is closed behind me.

*****