*James*

She's avoiding me. I never saw Julia the rest of the night or the next morning. Not once. I clock out and head home feeling like an idiot. I messed it all up and now I hope I didn't mess up our friendship too. 

I clock out and take advantage of the Marriott's free breakfast, bringing it behind to where the kitchen is. The cafeteria workers don't mind. They let me sit here and hide away to eat breakfast almost every morning. I've become friends with most of them.

"How's your mom doing?" Al, one of the cooks looks over his shoulder while flipping pancakes. He's been here probably as long as I have now. He's a good man. A big heavy old black man who could use to lose a pound or twenty.  I talk to Al the most back here.

 I sit on the folding chair and place my tray on the small card table we use to eat, shoving hash browns in my mouth like I haven't eaten in hours. Because I haven't.  It's just easier and cheaper to eat here. I don't mind. I can't afford shit like going to Starbucks every day for breakfast. My money needs to go to more important things in my life. Important people. My family.

"She's getting worse." I don't sugar coat it and also keep my eyes lowered to my breakfast instead of making eye contact. Al is busy making breakfast anyways so he can't really look over his shoulder all morning. He talks while he works.

"Damn. I'm sorry. I was hoping it wouldn't progress this quickly."

"Yeah. You and me both. But she's ok. We're all pitching in and doing our best taking care of her. I can't put her in one of those homes." I drink my orange juice and shovel eggs in my mouth.

"No way, James. She's too young for that. You're doing the right thing. It's hard. I know it is."

I know Al understands. His wife died not too long ago. She also had dementia. But she didn't go downhill until she was much older, like in her seventies. My mom isn't even sixty years old.

We stay silent for a little while as he cooks and cleans up and I finish eating. 

"Here ya go, friend." Al pats me on the back and puts a Styrofoam take out container in front of me. Al packs me extra food every single day. He's done it forever. He knows money is tight and I appreciate every free meal I can get.

"Thanks, Al." I nod and get up, taking my free meal for later in one hand and my empty tray to disregard in the other. "I appreciate it."

"I know you do, son. Keep your head up." The old man points up. "Trust in Him, it will get easier someday."  Al is a Christian man like me. If it weren't for believing in something I wouldn't have made it this far. Neither would Al.

*****

I let my mind wander while driving the short distance from the Marriott to my house, and once I get home, am greeted by my little best friend.

"Hey Mags." I walk in and kick off my shoes as my dogs jumps all over me.  I put the food in the fridge and fall to the couch. The dog follows me everywhere looking for attention. Once I'm on the couch she jumps on me, clearly happy to see her owner and starts licking my face. I squint my eyes and move my face to the side, so she only licks my cheek.

"At least I know SOMEONE loves me." I sigh and ruffle up her fur. "Cmon girl. Let's  go for a run."

I quickly change out of my Marriott uniform and throw it on the floor. My laundry is now piling up thanks to the fricken washing machine kicking the bucket on me. I'm gonna have to do my laundry at the hotel. I have no money to this piece of shit to work and mom's medical bills are coming in daily now. I sigh and head out to go to me and Mags favorite place to run. Griffith Park.

 I run, with Maggie on her leash. She can keep up and loves the fresh air. Usually running clears my head but today, my thoughts are consumed with Julia. The potential kiss. If only Hollan didn't interrupt us.  I wonder what ever happened the rest of the night. I wonder if she even thinks of me or if it was all a big mistake. It's fine if it was, I still want to be friends with her no matter what. I just don't want her to feel weird around me now.

*****

*Trisha*

Nate has a busy day at the studio, so I won't see much of him. Which leaves me to run his errands. I spend the day picking up his clothes from the cleaners, pay his bills for him and run through next week's schedule with him. 

Richard has been on his ass with getting more promo's in. I don't know how the guy thinks we can fit anything more into Nate's calendar. He's out of his tree. All he sees when he looks at Nate is money, and I hate that with a passion. 

I text Nate back and forth while running his errands, reminding him where he needs to be next. I have no choice but to have him in the forefront of my mind. It's my job. To make sure where he's supposed to be and when. My job is exhausting but I love it. I love him. As a friend. I'll do anything to keep him afloat and I can't complain. I get paid well. Real well. I may just be a personal assistant but I'm Nate Hollan's personal assistant. I will never have to worry about money for the rest of my life.

The day flies by and the evening approaches quickly. I'm finally home, out of my dressy clothes, showered and fed thanks to Door dash. I love to cook but it's just me now. I'm not going to make a five-course meal for just myself.

I lounge on my couch and flip through the channels settling on an episode of Law & Order I've seen a trillion time already. That's when my phone rings. It's Nate. Not a text, a phone call ... which means something's up.

Leaving out most of the details, Nate makes me aware of something being wrong with Julia. He's taking her back to his place. 

No fucking way. Why does he do this to me!!

"Trish, I'm just letting you know. I'm not asking for your permission."

"Damn right you're not, because I would say no. It's not a good idea." I am less than pleased at the idea of Julia going back to Nate's. The media will eat this up and I'm sick of covering for his sorry ass.

"She's not well, Trisha. I'm not dropping her off to a hotel and leaving her alone."

"Nate...."

"Listen to me, she hasn't been getting enough sleep, ok? At all. Maybe 3 hours a night, Trish. This is all still new to her. She's beyond exhausted. I don't want her driving when she's so sleep deprived."

Jesus Christ... 

"Dammit, Nate...HOW would you know that. Please, for the love of God, please tell me you two haven't been -"

"NO! No. We haven't. She just told me once, that's it, we haven't done a thing, Trisha."

I take a deep breath and sigh.

"Oh good, you almost gave me a heart attack, Nate. You know what that would do to your reputation, your career. Richard would have your head. And, you know it's breaking the contract - coaches having outside relations with the contestants."

I'm purposely saying this to remind him. He can be an idiot sometimes. He does things without thinking, sometimes letting his dick think for him... I'm always gonna be babysitting, aren't I?

"No one saw you two leaving together, correct?"

"No one saw it. It was an empty parking lot. Seriously, I'm just going to have her stay until she feels a little better. Make her a cup of tea, and once I know she's ok, I will take her to get her car. I just wanted to let you know. Once she gets some sleep, she'll be good to go. But I'm not an idiot. I will make sure to be smart about it. No one needs to know. "

Now I get it. He's not thinking with his dick. He's thinking with his heart. I can tell. He wants to take care of Julia and make sure she's fine. That's what he does. It's what he does for his sister and what he does for anyone who needs help.

"Listen, sweetie. I get it, ok?" I sympathize, knowing where Nate's coming from now. I know you know what to do. I know you've been through this before. I know things weren't the best for you- but don't get caught up in this if it's a real problem. If she has real problems. You can't fix everyone."

"This has nothing to do with, actually, you know what? I don't need to explain myself to you. I'm going to make sure Julia is fine and then I will take her home. That's it." He snaps back and hangs up on me. Jerk. I call him once. Then twice just to annoy him more, but he doesn't pick up.  Whatever, loser. I finish watching my show and head to bed. He'll call me back. He always does. Whether he knows it or not I have him wrapped around my finger just like he has me wrapped around his.

Right when I start to fall asleep, Nate calls. 

"She's back at the hotel, and she's fine."

"So you didn't bring her home with you?" I ask, please say you didn't bring her home.

"No. I walked her up to her room to make sure she got in ok and left." Thank God.

"No one questioned why you were there?" 

"The only one around was the front desk employee." Nate sighs and I can hear him take a swig from a bottle. Motherfucker.

"I just walked her by and told him she had a little too much to drink at an event. I was back down within 10 minutes."

"And now you're drinking..." I let out a sigh now too. He's starting to drink more frequently. I'm not liking this. Not one bit.

"And now I'm drinking..."

"Christ, Nate. Do you need me to come over and babysit you?"

"No, I'm fine, Trish. Really. I'm going to head to bed soon."

"Ok, check in with me in the morning. Don't go getting into your own head over there. I know you. Put the bottle down and get some sleep." I respond.

"Yeah, I'm done anyways. I already put the bottle away. Goodnight Trish."

Liar.  He probably brought the damn bottle to bed with him.

******

"We have a fire to put out, Hollan."

The last thing I need is Richard on my ass. Luckily, Nate's hot-headed manager still has 4 more days of vacation in Mexico, so tuning him out on FaceTime was much easier than in person. Richard kept the call short so he could go back to his partner on the beach.

If only I could go on vacation to escape Nate's drama. I may not show it, but Hollan gives me so much more anxiety than need be.

It didn't take long for Nate's name to show up in the tabloids, breaking the internet this morning. This kid is gonna kill me.

Monday is already starting off amazing...

"I mean, come ON, look at the damn photo. There's no way they can make this into a believable story. " Nate annoyingly reads the article over my shoulder on the laptop. I push my chair forward into the desk to get a closer look.

The conference room at the studio is empty, with Richard being away and the news just breaking this morning. It's just me and my idiot of a best friend in the room.

"This is ridiculous. How can you tell anyone's doing anything from this shot. You can clearly see I'm helping her in the car."

"You know that, and I know that, but do you think anyone is going to care? This just doesn't look good." I remind him. The fucking tabloids are gonna eat this up! What the hell was Nate thinking!!

It's 11am, and I already feel exhausted, I can't imagine what Nate's agent and publicist must be going through. Fortunately, they were right on top of the media news. They made it so Nate apparently had already denied these allegations - before he even woke up and knew about this.

There's nothing I can do but stand here and obsess over this article, now all over the internet within a few hours' time.

"I can't fucking look at this anymore." Nate reaches over me to shut the laptop and looks out the window to the parking lot.

"You said you were careful." He SAID he was careful! How could this happen?

"And I was, all I did was give her a ride home. The lot was completely empty. There were no other cars there." Nate says and I believe him.

He really did think the lot was empty, didn't he? I hate how the media twists everything he does into a story. This has Susan Hardy written all over it and I feel sick to my stomach.

"You just need to be on high alert from this point on. One story leads to another, and you don't need this type of media attention." I feel like I'm about to have panic attack over this. Nate may be calm and cool, but this stuff means more work for me. I need to find a way to get out of this room.

I pretend to look at my phone and abruptly grab my coat like I'm in a rush. I'm not. I don't have anything planned, but I need a breather. I also don't want Nate seeing me have a panic attack. I need to show him I can handle this job...even when I can't.

"Shit. I'm gonna be late. I have a meeting with your event coordinator in 15 minutes. Text me later." I lie and rush out.

Once outside I take a deep breath in and exhale. This job is so stressful. How am I going to keep up when Nate is always doing shit to end up in tabloids? Now I'm going to have to deal with Richard and the team while he doesn't have a care in the world. God, I hate him. He's lucky I love him.

I sit on the front step of the studio entrance, taking in as much air as I can before deciding on taking an Ativan. I'm grateful to have a good therapist who understands how stressful my life is. She prescribed this medication after my mom died, and I don't take it often, but today... today is an Ativan day. I rummage through my purse and take the proper dose before opening the article on my phone one last time.

[ Hollywood Headliners.]

Top Stories

{{Celebrity Heartthrob Nate Hollan Gets Hot and Heavy with New Woman in His Life.}}

The pop sensation Singer-Songwriter Nate Hollan and winning contestant of "America's Voice" Bucket List contest Julia Moretti were seen being intimate outside Modern Record Studios this weekend.

Photos capture the two holding and kissing each other in the empty parking lot Friday evening......

I shut my phone down before finishing the article and pinch the bridge of my nose, feeling a stress headache starting.

*****

*James*

All weekend I thought about Julia. I haven't seen her once while working. She hasn't come down to visit me once. She's avoiding me, and I hate that. I ruined a perfectly good friendship because of one kiss.

To keep busy, I spend time with my mom and sisters all weekend. Lindsay has the dog, so I don't worry about going home to feed her or take her out. Mom had a good weekend when I didn't look in her eyes. The minute she sees my blue eyes, I'm Joe. I fucking hate being Joe. I am grateful for my sisters who remind mom every single time that I'm her son, not her abusive husband. They may give in on little things, but when it comes to knowing it's me, they always correct her.

It's Monday morning now, and I purposely took on Cheryl's shift at work for her. She doesn't mind the day off and knows I need the money so is always willing to take a break and give me her hours. I'm exhausted from working all night, but at some point, I have to bump into Julia. This is getting ridiculous. We need to talk about shit.

Instead, I get to see Nate Fricken Hollan. I don't hate him. But I don't like him either, for obvious reasons. He barely acknowledges me when he walks through hand heads for the elevator. He's so cocky and it gets under my skin.

I sit back in my chair and look at the clock. And then look at it again fifteen minutes later. After a half hour, I noticed a call come through on the hotel phone. Julia's room. I quickly pick it up. It's Nate ordering room service. A hell of a lot of room service, which also makes my heart drop because now I know what they've been doing. Regardless, I take down the order to submit it to the kitchen.

Fine. It's one thing to be fucking the guy, whatever, but avoiding me all together over a simple kiss? C'mon.

I text Al and tell him to let me know when the food is ready. Hell, I will be the one delivering to Julia today. I never do this job. Al laughs having a feeling he knows what I'm up to. I've told him very little details but he's a smart old man. He knows what I'm doing.

About 15 minutes go by before the order is ready. Nate practically ordered every single friggen thing off the menu. Must be nice to have money while I eat my free breakfast for lunch most days of the week. I go up to Julia's room and knock on her door.

" Room Serv-" I say while the door is opening but instead of Julia answering it, its friggen Nate Hollan. He catches me off guard and interrupts me before I can even finish the sentence. Rude bastard.

"Yeah, Thanks man, I got it from here." Nate says, obviously irritated.

"Um yeah, Sorry. We're short staffed-" I look past Nate and see Julia. She looks pale. Something's up. She doesn't look well. "Julia, you ok??"

"She's fine. Where do I sign." Nate cuts me off, but I pay no attention to him, keeping my eyes glued on Julia. She'll find a way to let me know if something is wrong

"I'm good, James, Thanks. I just had the stomach bug this weekend. But I'm better and my appetite is back." Julia fakes a smile which makes me uneasy about the whole situation. Regardless I have to do my job and keep things light.

"Apparently." I smirk, looking at the amount of food, and get a genuine smile from Julia. making me feel relieved. "Well, if you guys need anything. Anything at all. Don't hesitate to call down." I keep my focus on her and smile and nod before Nate takes the two trays from me and slams the door in my face.

Asshole.

****

*Trisha*

Once the Ativan kicks in I'm able to focus on the tasks ahead. Today will be busy for Nate, but not for me. I'm going to get my hair done and take a fucking nap. The only thing on my agenda after this morning's drama is to remind Nate of the meetings and sessions he has planned this afternoon.

Right when I pull into the parking lot of the salon, my notifications go off. Are you for real? Nate has cancelled everything scheduled for the rest of the day. All the hard work I put in to make sure everything is perfect for him and that nothing overlaps, he goes and erases. Jerk.

He better be sick or dying or something. Either way, he's getting an earful. I sit in my car and call him.

"Hey Trish, what's up?" Nate answers nonchalantly.

"Where are you?" He can tell I'm fuming.

"Why? What's going on."

"Your meeting? Your session for tonight? Why did you cancel everything?" I ask. He better have a good excuse.

"Yeah, the studio called and had to cancel. So, I will reschedule that for next week."

"And your session with Julia? Have you even heard from her since Friday?"

"I actually talked to her this morning. She's fine. Apparently, she had the stomach bug this weekend, so she cancelled her practice for tonight, just to give it one more day and make sure she's not contagious or anything."

Julia's sick. "That's awful. Maybe I'll go swing by the hotel and check on her. That's got to be the worst feeling being sick and stuck in a hotel room. I'll order some Panera soup for her."

"Funny you mentioned that. When Julia told me she was under the weather, I went ahead and ordered her some soup and stuff. I also had the front desk go up and check on her to make sure she was good and didn't need anything."

Ok, scratch that good deed idea for today. Nate already has it covered. He's a caretaker, whether he wants to admit it or not. He is always taking care of people and putting them first.

"Well, it looks like you were one step ahead of me. Enjoy your night, Nate. And don't cancel tomorrow's interview. It took me forever to book that, and I'm sure they are going to bring up the article that was published. You need to clear the air. If you cancel, I'm going to fucking kill you, you hear that?" I warn and he knows I'm anything but kidding.

"Loud and clear boss."

-------

*James*

I'm exhausted but now it's time for my real shift. I haven't slept since Saturday afternoon thanks for taking on Cheryl's shift on top of my own. I fell asleep hard on my mom's couch Saturday after visiting with her for a bit. Once she thought I was Joe and got all worked up, I went to the living room and fell asleep. Fortunately, my sister Jennie woke me up in time to get to work. That's the only sleep I've had and now it's time for my overnight shift.

I have yet to see Julia.

Hours go by. It's now dark and pouring out and nobody is here. I decide to help the struggling old woman who just got a cleaning job here and can't pull the trash out of the bin. She's too old to be working a job like this a I feel bad for her. She already has one full bag to take out and t she can't carry two.

"Hey, Lemme get that for you." I grab my coat and take the heavy bags out to the dumpster. It's pouring out and there's no way I'm letting this lady lug this trash out in the rain.

That's when I see them. Nate and Julia. Making out in his SUV like two teenagers. My heart drops. I stop dead in my tracks for a quick second, getting drenched from the rain.

I can't believe this. It's official. They're a thing.

I angrily throw the two bags into the dumpster, making a loud bang in hopes to startle them, and walk back to the hotel furious.

What's worse is Julia continues to bypass me, using side doors to get to her room instead of walking through the lobby. I don't know why I'm taking this so hard.

But even if we weren't a thing...

I've just lost my best friend.