*James*

"Welcome home!!!!"  My family shouts the second we open the door to my house. Even my mother is here. Maggie goes crazy when she sees the girls and heads straight to Ma. I purposely avoid eye contact with my mother but give her this huge hug before anyone else. God, I've missed my family so much. They are my everything.

I had a feeling Julia would sneak away from everyone and I can't blame her. After an 11-hour flight and not feeling great the last thing she wants is a houseful of people. Paul follows her to make sure she's ok while I visit the girls.

"We missed you so much, Jamie." Ashley says and my sisters bombard me with hugs and kisses.

"You have a lovely home, Jamie." Mom has been to my house a trillion times but apparently with her dimentia she thinks it's her first time.

"Thanks mom. I worked hard for this. I'm glad you like it." I play along keeping my eyes down and feel her scruff up my hair and wrap her arms around me.

"I'm so proud of you. You know that? Your father is too." She pauses. "He just doesn't know how to show it sometimes."

Yeah, ok mom...

"No mom. He is an awful man." Gwen chimes in. We let a lot of things go but when it comes to Joe, we will ALWAYS remind mom he is not a good person. We never want her to feel like she can be comfortable around him. God forbit a day comes when he is near her and she doesn't realize the awful things he has done to us all. Including her. She's very trusting when she doesn't understand or remember things.

"He just has trouble showing his emotions, that's all. You girls know that." Mom is still sticking up for her abusive husband and the girls won't let it go. I'm the one who usually ignores it, but I get where the girls are coming from. They don't want mom to ever let her guard down. Ever.

"No mom. He has trouble keeping his hands to himself. THAT'S what he has trouble doing." Jennie's eyes become glossy. I know my father has hurt us in all different ways but the girls.... the girls he hurt in ways that I can't even put into words. There's a reason not one of my sisters are married or have kids. They will most likely never have husbands of their own. The damage he did to them was too much and trusting men is something they all struggle with. Jennie is the one for some reason who dates the most and lets her guard down the most.  She goes through men like the rest of us go through toilet paper. She is also the one who attracts people who are like my father. People like Dave Brennan. 

I worry about Jennie.

*****

*Trisha*

"Welcome to Oslo, Norway!" Leslie reminds us of where we are as she holds open the door to the Oslo Spektrum. A stadium that holds 10,080 people with a sold out show tonight. This one show will rake in $800,000 just in ticket sales alone, never mind any merch sold. Nate did well. REALLY well.

"Are you still texting that Noah guy?" Nate raises a brow at me while I read a funny meme Noah texted me.

"Maybe. What's it to you?" I tease but can tell Nate is having a hard time. Julia hasn't reached out to him or texted him back once since saying goodbye. She has some nerve after all he does for her to fucking ghost him the way she's ghosting him. But in a way, maybe this is a good thing. Maybe she's doing this so Nate can focus on what's important right now. His tour.

"She'll come around." Jonah gives Nate a little nudge.

"I think she's pissed at me now. She went from her sad phase to her angry phase now that she's home."  Nate shoves his phone back in his pocket once we enter the rec room area of the stadium, already set up for today.

"She might be pissed now but you did the right thing." Casey chimes in. "She hit her rock bottom, Nate. She could have died from OD'ing. Needing to get your stomach pumped is no joke."

Rock Bottom. How many damn rock bottoms is the woman gonna have?? 

"I should be there with her." Nate sits on the couch, and I plop down next to him.

"No, Nate. This is where you should be. Let her detox and get healthy. You have your own obligations. Like getting ready for your meet and greet event in two hours and then Concert Night 6. Should have been 7 if you performed in Berlin. We will still have to make that one up for your fans." I remind him.

"Weird not having the rest of your crew here." Evan, the youngest bandmate says while flipping through the channels of the TV. I scoff at that

"Please, you just miss Julia. I saw the way you were eyeing her, creep." I say and the kid shrugs me off.

"What. She was hot." Evan laughs and settles on a football game to keep him occupied.

"And taken..." Nate responds.

"Nobody is EVER taken. Even with vows and a ring. Shit happens."

Nate ignores the ignorant child and goes up to the catered table to grab some much-needed food. I follow along. I notice he puts chicken wings, Julia's favorite, on his plate. Nate HATES spicy food. Always has. What the hell is going through his mind right now??

"Really Nate? You'll drive yourself insane if you do shit like that." I grab a plate of my own.

"Leave me alone. If it weren't for you, she'd still-"

"Nate." Jonah cuts him off and shakes his head. I frown and quickly walk away. Nate doesn't go two minutes without reminding me of the mistakes I've made. God, if I did that to him, I'd be reminding him all day and night. But this one stung and he knows it. I feel my cheeks flush up and suddenly lost my appetite, leaving my plate at the table and heading to the bathroom.

I don't like people seeing me upset and I tend to get pretty upset when it's something Nate says to me. My eyes sting with tears and I try to dab them without ruining my makeup. It's no use. I'm a crying mess now.

The bathroom door swings open, and I don't look up, already knowing who it is just from the smell of his intoxicating cologne.

"This is a woman's room, jerk." I sniff and turn away.

"Trish, I'm sorry." The British accent fills the small bathroom. "I know it's not your fault. I don't know why I said that.

"Cuz you're an asshole, that's why..." I feel Nate turn me around and I drop my head to his chest. "You're such an asshole. I never meant for-"

"I know, angel." Nate holds me and lets me cry. "I'm sorry."

"You know I would never do something to hurt another person." I sniff again. Does he really think I'm some evil witch that purposely leaves pills around for addicts to take? Because I'm not.

"No, I know. I'm just frustrated right now because she's not giving me the time of day and I took it out on you."

"Well can you take it out on someone else from now on? Like Jonah or something. Cuz that one hurt." I finally look up into Nate's blue eyes and he nods while wiping a tear from my cheek He kisses my forehead and takes my hand.

"You got it. Jonah it is. C'mon, let's go back in there and eat."

"You eat those chicken wings you're going to die of heart burn, Hollan."

"I know.. I don't know why I did that." Nate shakes his head. 

 I don't know why either...

*****

*James*

Once my mom and sisters head out, I head to the backyard where I know Paul and Julia are. She stayed out here all afternoon. I sit next to Julia and hold her shaky hand as she leans her head on my arm and closes her eyes. She's struggling.

We all see my phone light up on the patio table with Nate's name, but Julia doesn't answer.

"Sooner or later you're gonna have to text him back." Paul grumbles without looking up from his own phone.

"Why bother? He should go focus on his tour. That's what he went there to do. I was just a distraction. I'm out of his hair now."

"Babe, you haven't answered one of his texts to let you know we've arrived safely? Why are you ignoring him?" I ask.

"I'm not ignoring him. I have nothing to say. I just want to get through this detox and then I'll feel myself again." Julia gets up suddenly and heads inside.

"This is going to be harder than I thought." I mutter.

"Let's order some pizza and door dash some beer. Hollan and Jonah aren't here. We can actually have a beer with our dinner."

I could go for a beer right now.

******

"What's going on over there? Why is she ignoring me?" Nate asks on the other line. Paul has the phone on the table on speaker so I can hear and I'm unsure if Nate knows this. We sit back and have a beer together while Julia is sleeping up in my room.

"She shut down a little. Been sleeping since around five." Paul says, tasking a sip from his beer and helping me grab another slice of pizza. "Why are you even awake?! Isn't it five in the morning or some shit?"

"Can't sleep. I don't get why she isn't answering any of my texts though." Nate answers.

"She's just having a hard time now that she's home. That's all, boss." The bodyguard responds.

"Has she eaten?"

There's a pause before Paul answers. No. We tried to get Julia to eat a little and left a slice of pizza up on my nightstand for her in case she changed her mind. But Maggie took it upon herself to snag it and run into the den with her pizza dinner. Damn dog. I had to laugh at that though and let Mags eat the slice of pizza. I don't usually but she's been through a lot too with all this traveling and one piece won't harm her. Paul poured real dog food in her dish for me which she inhaled as well. She's so spoiled.

"No. She gave us a hard time. But I'm gonna wake her up and try again soon."

"How's Gallo?" Nate is asking how I am? Look at that. Tin man DOES have a heart.

"He's happy to be home. His sisters and mother surprised him with a visit and did a food shopping, so we are all set here." Paul looks at me with a little nod.

"Good. Ok. Can you keep me updated on Julia?" 

"Will do." Paul hangs up.

"I don't understand why she won't just call him back." I nod for my beer and Paul helps me with my grip before letting go. I take a swig and keep it in my hand, so he doesn't have to keep doing this for me. Paul's a good guy. A quiet guy, but a good guy. He never makes me feel bad for what I can no longer do. And the more days that go by the more I realize I may never get my coordination back fully and may always be like this. Forever.

******

*Trisha*

"Hey, playboy. Wake up. We got a flight to catch." I nudge Nate and he groans, putting the pillow over his face like a damn teenager.

"What time is it?"

"It's 10am. We have to get there an hour early to go through security remember? Your jet will be ready and waiting for us in Sweden tomorrow."

"And put that thing away. No time for that." I look down at the hard on Nate is sporting which I swear happens every fucking day with him. I get out of the bed before doing something I will later regret and begin to get ready for the day.

"Like I can help it." Nate throws a pillow at me while I'm undressing. "You can't be doing that shit, Trisha."

"Oh, grow up. It's a human body. Get over it." I pull up my underwear. Nate knows me by now. I'm very confident with my body. Everyone should be. It's the way the good lord above made us, and we should be happy in our own skin.

"You do that shit when Paul lived with you?"

"Sure did, playboy. Again. It's just a body." I smirk. If Nate only knew the things I did with Paul...

****

*James*

It's Monday morning and Julia is giving Paul a hard time with..well...every single thing.  Paul had to be the one to help me get dressed, let the door out and help me buckle into the big SUV Nate's driver Ren picked me up in. I'm heading to my mom's for the day where Katie, Kendall, mom and this new nurse, Claudia, will be. I'm actually a little excited. It's been a long time since I've spent a full day at mom's house and I'm a pro at getting around my whole blue eyes thing. Kendall said she already let Claudia know the issues, so we don't have to rehash it if mom freaks out suddenly. Gwen talks to Lindsay sometimes as she has become friends with all my sisters over the years and she's going to come spend time here as well to see the dog. Maggie is going to love seeing her "mommy" after not seeing her for so long. I'm tempted to offer letting Linds take her for a few days, but because of my recent seizure, I kind of want the dog around to alert Paul and Julia in case it happens at home. Lindsay understands. She always does.

Lindsay is at the house before me with coffee and pastries for everyone which I thought was really nice. Ma loves Lindsay but I have a feeling this may confuse her into thinking we are together.

The minute Kendall helps me out of the car the dog books it to the house and waits for someone to open it. It's like she just knows her other owner is on the other side of that door.

"Thanks Ren." I say as Ken unbuckles my seatbelt for me.

"My pleasure sir." He hands my sister his business card with his contact info. Nate must have told him about me and how I can't finagle a phone. "Call me whenever you are ready to head home, Mr. Gallo."

Katie opens the door and lets Maggie in but has a bit of a confused look on her face.

"Hey Jamie! What a great surprise!"

Surprise......? She was right in the same room when we made these plans. Kendall rolls her eyes at our oldest sister and comments under her breath. "I can't believe we have two dementia patients now." She lets out a sarcastic little sigh.

Right. Katie is going down the same road as mom. I wonder if Lindsay knows this. She's sitting in the kitchen with my mom who is still in her pajamas and petting the dog. Nurse Claudia is with my mom as well.

"Mom, say hi to Jamie, then I will help you get ready for the day." Kendall says and sits down for breakfast.

"Why the hell are you here, Joe? How many times have I told you... you're not allowed here anymore."

Here we go. ....

"Miss Gallo. That's your son, James. Remember? I told you he'd stop by today. This is his dog, Maggie." The young nurse, Claudia reminds my mom. Claudia looks young. Real young. Maybe Casey's age with long red hair pulled back into a braid, bright big green eyes and a face full of freckles. She's attractive but young looking. Did I mention she looks really young? But Mom listens to her and nods her head.

"Oh, that's right... cmere and give your mom a hug, Jamie." My mom smiles brightly.

Today is going to be a rollercoaster of a day, isn't it?

*******

*Trisha*

In between Nate's events and soundcheck he has an hour to spare. Me? Not so lucky. Leslie drags me into a vacant room for one of her "meetings." Aka getting high and talking smack about people or the production team. Leslie can be very talkative when she is comfortable, and I know this meeting is just to hang out because everything that needs to be done is done-you're welcome, Leslie.

"Ok who's the new bodyguard???" Leslie asks after popping some random pill that does God knows what.

"Oh.. Evan. That's Nate's personal bodyguard. Paul had to head back."

"Is he single?" She gives me a wink and opens up her big binder. I guess we ARE going over tour shit. I rummage through my bag to pull out my Tour binder as well.

"I have no idea! You should go up to him and ask him."

"Or just go up to him and escort him to the nearest bathroom so I can have my way with him."

"You really are the girl version of Nate Hollan, aren't you?" I scoff and Leslie shrugs.

"Nothing wrong with that. How else are we going to get action with the careers we have. Long term relationships just aren't an option for us workaholics."

She's not wrong there. When you are part of the Nate Hollan Show, as I call it, or any celebrity really, you dedicate all your time to your job. You need to. It's a requirement. Having a social life outside of your job is rare.  The job is very fulfilling but if you think you have a future settling down with a husband and children, good luck. It's just not happening.  Even Holly, being Nate's hair and make-up lady, has a hard time now that she has children of her own. They are pretty much raised by their nanny. Because Holly's job is being available and willing to drop everything if Nate has an interview or any public appearance. She's good at what she does and is in high demand, but Nate comes first before any other celebrity client. And while we are touring. She flies with the production team and on their schedule, so her liver-in Nanny has the kids for months at a time. Imagine not seeing your kids...or husband for weeks sometimes months at a time?

Maybe that's why I'm so invested in my best friend. If I can't settle down with him at least I can be with him as much as possibly by working for him.

*******

*James*

"Holy crap James." Lindsay catches her breath as I roll off her. Yep. Booty-call.  After we all went out to eat for lunch, Lindsay wanted to "take the dog home" for a little while, and I joined her. 

I joined her all right.

"I forgot how good you feel." She wraps her leg around me.

"You did??" I smirk and slide under the covers. Lindsay rests her head on my bare chest, letting her long blonde hair flow across the pillow.

"No. There's no forgetting that. How can you be so good in bed but can barely button your jeans?" She teases me and I roll my eyes.

"Gee, thanks for reminding me, Linds. That was a buzzkill." I joke back.

"I've missed you. I've missed this. Why did we break up again?" She looks up at me with her big blue eyes. I tuck my chin in and kiss the top of her head.

"I think we got bored with each other. Not in bed, obviously. Just in general. And your job and all the tra- traveling for work... sorry." I apologize for my slight stutter, but I don't think Lindsay even noticed.

"Yeah. Traveling for work did become an issue. It's always an issue." She sighs.

"What happened to that Chad guy... or Brad or whatever his name was?" I ask, remembering Lindsay talking about a hot date she was getting ready for before I left for tour.

"Brad. Yeah, he just wanted to get in my pants. Not happening."

"Yet you let me... and we're not together......" I smile down at her and shake my head.

"Yeah, cuz you're James Gallo. Any woman would want James Gallo."

Yeah, except the one woman that I-I-I want...

***

"Julia. Knock it off..." Paul picks up the pasta off the floor just as me and Jennie enter my house. Shit. Julia is having one of her Bipolar episodes. I don't need Jennie OR the dog seeing this.

"Please! I can't do this!" Julia cries.

"Take Maggie for a walk, Jen... please." I look back at my sister and shake my head. She knows I don't want her seeing this. Jennie has dealt with enough screaming, yelling and breaking things from our childhood. She doesn't need to witness it as an adult too. I will do anything to protect my sisters and seeing Julia like this just reminds us of times mom was bold enough to fight back. Mom was a firecracker back in the day and sometimes would lose her cool with Joe when he would do something bad. It never ended well. Usually trips to the emergency room and us cleaning up broken shards of plates or something stupid.  Jennie quickly leaves my house with the dog.

"Babe, what's going on?"

"I need another dose. James... I threw up my first dose and the afternoon one didn't work. And THIS dickhead won't give me anymore till tonight!" Julia cries. I look around my small kitchen and see she must have had her meltdown during lunch. Pasta is all over my floor, her dish AND glass on the ground shattered. I won't be able to clean this up with my coordination and the dog can't come back in until all the glass is picked up. She could cut her paws.

"How bout we not  wreck my house, sweetie. I worked hard for what I have." I frown at the mess. 

That's all it took. Julia bursts into tears and runs upstairs, slamming my bedroom door behind her.

"I-I need to clean this before my sister comes back with the dog." I stutter and kneel down, trying my best to pick up the shards of glass.

"I got it Gallo, you're gonna slice your hand open. Where's your broom and dustpan?" Paul sighs and I show him where the hall closet is that has all my cleaning supplies, broom and vacuum.

"She can't be doing this shit Paul. Not in front of my sisters. Julia sometimes forgets what we went through as kids... doing stuff like this...... it will mess with Jennie's head, ya know?"

Paul knows. He knows exactly who Joe Gallo is. Most of L.A. know who Joe Gallo is. He's made a name for himself and it's not a good one.

"I know. It came out of nowhere." Paul grumbles while cleaning up the mess Julia made.

This can't be happening. Not here. Not in my home. Not around my sisters. I hate thinking badly about Julia. It's not her fault. She's been through hell and back. But so have we. 

 And my family will ALWAYS come first no matter what.