Chapter 28 Beautiful Disaster


*James*

We're going home. It's what's best for Julia....and for me. But at least we are going to my home. the tour is over and to be honest, I'm ok with it. Sure, it was fun while it lasted but traveling the world just to hang out in one arena to the next isn't my cup of tea. We rarely have time to sight see and when we do, it has to be on Hollan's schedule. Which I knew. We are here for his job. But Julia is far from healthy, and things have just been getting worse and worse for her.

So the plan is. Fly home with Paul and Julia. Julia will go to the Avalon with Paul as her bodyguard and I will spend my mornings at mom's house. Which I'm fine with. I just can't look at her. But I will get taken care of thanks to the nurse Nate hired and will get to spend time with my sisters. It's all temporary until Julia can get back on her feet.

I just have to get through this 11- hour flight. As does Julia. And telling Julia these plans was hard. So hard both Casey and I ended up having to leave the room. Julia feels like everyone is giving up on her. We are doing the opposite, though. This needs to be done to keep her alive. Julia doesn't see it that way though.

"This is so hard." Casey wipes her eyes while we both pace up and down the hall together. "Seeing her cry like that..."

"I know. And I hate to admit this. I'm really nervous about going home with her like this. Nate knows how to take care of her, calm her down, get her to eat. I know Paul will be able to handle her.... but..." I can't even say the words out loud. Because I feel awful admitting being around Julia during her detox may be too much for me. I'd NEVER tell her that. But it's the reality. 

"I know. But maybe being at your mom's house will help, you know? Surrounded by your family?"

"Yeah, maybe. I love Julia. She's my best friend. And I love her more than just best friends, but I can't handle her when she goes into one of her episodes. It scares the shit out of me."

******

*Trisha*

"Julia did NOT take that news well." I huff. I'm back at the hotel with Jonah and Casey. Casey is walking Maggie, trying to spend as much time with the dog as possible before the morning. Jonah is in Nate's suite with me.

"It's not going to be easy. But she can't detox on the road like this. And Nate can't focus on his job and take care of Julia at the same time." Jonah says exactly what I've been thinking all along.

"Nate is gonna be a mess." I continue and pour Jonah a cup of tea before we bring our mugs to the couch with us.

"For a little while, sure. But he'll get used to it. Eventually." The nurse says. "I think this will be good for James. Going back home. This was a lot for him. All the traveling and not being able to fly much because of his brain injury. He is still healing."

"James will be happy to be home. He doesn't care about seeing the world. He is very content with his daily routine and living in his little "James bubble" and being around his family. He's easy to please and very low maintenance. He's not like Nate. He's a simple man." I sip my tea, realizing I may have rambled on a little too much about James and Jonah looks over at me.

"Were you.... You were starting to have feelings for James, weren't you?"

"Nooo.." I deny.

"Trisha Banks..." Jonah antagonizes and I smirk a little while putting my cup of tea down on the table.

"What? He's a good-looking guy. What can I say?" I keep my eyes on my teacup. Jonah's right. Of course I was starting to have feelings for James. I mean, I have had them for a while. Once we started hanging out as friends before the accident, we got to know each other and being around him felt nice. Comfortable. Then the accident happened and everything just ...died down. We were all too preoccupied.

" More than looks though..... admit it. You had a thing for James." Jonah eyes me, already knowing the truth now.

"Maybe. But it doesn't matter now. Anyways. I have a thing for a lot of guys. Like...Noah, for instance." We both look at my phone that lights up with a text message from "Fireman Noah" and Jonah laughs loudly. He gets comfortable on the couch, wanting me to dish out all the details.

"Spill the tea!"  He says, making me chuckle.

****

I had a feeling Nate wouldn't come back to the hotel and instead spend the night at the hospital with Julia. So I took it upon myself to pack up his things, knowing tonight's wardrobe is all ready for him in his dressing room at the Venue. This is it. As sad as I am that both James AND Paul are leaving, part of me is a bit relieved about Julia going home. She needs help and can't get it here. And this will help Nate too. Things will go back to normal. Tour will be how it used to be. Less stress, less drama, more enjoyable for Nate. We've worked hard for this to happen. Now it's our turn to enjoy it.

Once at the airport, outside in front of Nate's private jet, I realize this goodbye is going to be much harder than I anticipated.  No more Paul.... No more James.

"Can we get a dog?" Casey kneels down and hugs James's dog, teary-eyed.

"NO!" Both me and Nate say in unison. God no. We all love Maggie but no.

"Are you trying to replace Maggie already??" James snorts. "Don't listen to her Mags. You'll always be the O.G. tour dog."

Of course Casey is crying. She's like Julia. Very emotional. But when I give Paul a hug to say goodbye, it lingers. Fortunately, Nate is too busy saying goodbye to Julia to notice our embrace being longer than just a quick goodbye hug. Paul has been there for me during my darkest moments. Losing the baby, being attacked by Dave. Stalked by Dave... I feel like I'm losing my shadow. My protector. The one who always took care of me. He stepped up to the plate for me, nobody has done that for me. I'm the caregiver. And hell...even the sex was outstanding. Paul as always accompanied us on tour. So to go months without seeing my big bodyguard of a shadow will feel weird. 

"Evan Scolfield is good, Trish. Real good. You'll be safe with him." Paul says close to my ear yet he isn't letting me go and now I wonder if he ever wanted to break things off at all. He was just going along with it, wasn't he?

"Good luck with Moretti. Guard the bathrooms." I tease and Paul lets out a hefty laugh at our ongoing joke. I finally break away a little and give him a slight grin. He nods and I move on to say goodbye to James. I bypass Julia all together. There's no point. She's in Nate's arms crying.

"Hey James, The Receptionist." I smile at him, and he steps in closer. Why does this goodbye feel so hard?! We'll be back in L.A. eventually. We won't be on the road forever. Yet, I throw my arms around James and bury my head feeling tears run down my cheeks. "I'm gonna miss you Hot Stuff."

"Awww Trisha The Assistant, you're not........crying, are you?" He whispers in my ear and teases me.

"Maybe just a little." I melt into his arms and feel James drop his head on my shoulder. "Go to the Food Truck District and eat some tacos for me, ok?"

"Yeah, but not as messy as you. I can actually get the food in my mouth now, unlike you." James always made fun of the fact half my taco would fall out of the shell while I stuffed my face.

"I'm gonna miss your sense of humor." I back away but my eyes fall down to James's lips. God, I want to kiss him right now. But there's no way. Not out here. Not in front of everyone like this. Instead, James leans in and kisses my cheek."

"Bug Paul by facetiming me. A lot. Ok?" James says and finally backs away.  He wants me to call him on Paul's phone since he can't use one with his coordination. I nod and kneel down to scruff Maggie's fur a little. 

Casey hands Paul the dog's leash and James follows the bodyguard and pup up into the aircraft to get settled.  Paul then comes back down knowing he is going to have to tear Julia away from Nate.

Then I see it. Nate crying. No, not just crying, sobbing while he is holding Julia saying goodbye. It's heart wrenching to watch. I've never seen him cry like this over a woman.  And I've seen him cry.

"I don't want to go. Please..." Julia sobs into Nate's chest, breaking his heart even more.

"I'll be home for three weeks straight before you know it, ok? You're going to do just fine. "Nate's voice cracks as he chokes on his words, and I actually have to look away for a moment. This is almost too hard to watch.

"They should probably leave soon." I look down at my watch and back up to Nate, knowing the pilots and flight attendant are patiently waiting for the last person to board the aircraft. But Nate continues to hold and kiss Julia, unable to back away.

"Nate..." I say again right as Paul puts his hand on Julia's shoulder, pulling her away from Nate.

"C'mon Moretti, time to go."

I can tell Nate is about to burst into tears even more as his lip quivers when the Jet fires up the engine. He quickly turns around and rushes back into the terminal sobbing. The bodyguards follow him, and I watch the Jet begin to roll forward getting ready to take off.

 Half of our village is gone now. I don't know how I feel about this.

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