*James*

"There. She's up there." Mike's voice echoes through the hall. My heart skips a beat when we round the corner and see Julia talking to Jeremy outside their apartments.

"Where the hell were you? We looked everywhere." I snap at Julia.

"I'm right here. I locked myself out. Jeremy is waiting with me for the maintenance kid."

She's lying.

I can tell she's lying. Julia never lies to me. I shake my head at her as Paul unlocks the door. She quickly brushes by him and escapes into her apartment.  I storm in behind her.

"Julia." My voice lowers. I take her hand and sit on the couch, pulling her down with me.

"James."

"Talk to me."

Julia remains silent. She rests her head on my lap and Maggie, sensing Julia is sad, pushes her way to lay near us, licking Julia's face.

"Jule..." Nate glances around the room, feeling the weight of the piercing gazes directed him. He decides to give up, knowing nothing he says tonight will come out as intended.

"Fuck it." He huffs and heads to the guest bedroom.

Julia doesn't give me anything—not a word about her argument with Nate or why she was talking to Dr. Donovan in the hallway. She sticks to our routine and avoids the topic altogether. I don't bring it up either. I know Julia; if she doesn't want to talk she won't. She'll tell me when she's ready. 

Until then, I remain patient. Julia helps me with dinner, with my shower, with everything. She's good at caring for me, I'll give her that. She does every single thing- big or little- without ever being told or complaining about it.

I sit the toilet seat while Julia perches on the edge of the tub. The trash bin is placed between us as she carefully clips my fingernails.

"Thank you." I look down at what she's doing and shake my head.

"For what??" She doesn't look up at me, too focused on what she is doing.

"This. Everything. I know this isn't fun for you. I really thought by n-now I'd be able to-"

"James stop." Julia cuts me off and finally looks at me. "I never mind. Ever. You know that. I'd do anything for you." She smiles. "None of this bothers me and it never will. Don't forget I was once a mom. I've clipped my share of nails and cleaned up vomit and changed blowout diapers. I've done it all. You have too, haven't you??"

"Of course I have. Carter used to shit every five minutes as a baby." I laugh, thinking about the MANY blowout diapers that would send Kendall rushing to the bathroom to get sick. That girl can't handle anything!

"Danny too. The best were the ones that went up the back." She smirks and continues with my nails.

"Ugh, YES."

Julia's eyes begin to water thinking about her son.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't. I just miss him. You know how it is."

"I do, sweetie." I nod. God, do I miss my boy. "You were a real good mom, weren't you?"

"I was." A smile forms on Julia's face. "I was a damn good mom."

*****

*Trisha*

"Dr. Donovan has cancelled all appointments scheduled for tomorrow. I'm sorry for the inconvenience, Miss Banks." The polite Avalon receptionist says over the phone.

Odd. Jeremy never cancels sessions. I stare at my calendar app on my laptop and furrow my brows when I notice Richard has requested a meeting with me.

"Ma'am?"

"Right, sorry. Um. Can he meet with me the following day?" I stare at Richard's name wondering what the fucker is up to now.

"I'm sorry, Miss Banks. The doctor has cancelled all appointments for the remainder of the week. We do have an opening next Tuesday at three."

"Yeah, that's fine. Thanks." I hang up and let the receptionist's words sink in. What the hell is going on with Donovan? He took the week off?? Last minute??

Whatever.  I take a sip of my tea and glance up from my laptop at Evan who sits across from me in the small booth. It's been a while since I've been to Nate's favorite cafe. I think one of the last times I ended up bumping into Dave. I'm trying to get over my fears though. It's the whole reason I have the restraining order. I should be able to go where I want without looking over my shoulder all the time. It's also why I have Evan with me.

"May I help you, Miss Banks?" Evan raises a brow sarcastically when he notices me staring at him, lost in thought.

"I'll get back to you on that, hotpants." I roll my eyes with a smirk, then continue working on my laptop for a few more minutes before breaking the silence again.

"Why are all you bodyguards so damn quiet?" I close my laptop and look at the attractive man sitting across from me.

"Ma'am?" He gives me a confused look.

"Stop with the ma'am. You know what I mean. You and Paul. Both of you. You never talk! Aren't you bored out of your mind sitting here in silence watching me work??"

"No ma'am. Miss." He quickly corrects himself.

"HOW?!"

"Eyes and Ears Everywhere, Trisha. We are trained to listen. Not speak. You can't hear if you're too busy talking." He explains and takes a sip of his coffee, scanning the room with his eyes before looking back at me.

"So if you weren't working, you'd talk to me more?"

"I'm always working."

*****

*James*

I know it's a dream but it feels so real. Like this has happened before. I'm sitting on the sand. The sound of the ocean waves and the scent of the salt water fill the air around me. Carter is a toddler, attempting to make a sandcastle. Did I ever get the chance to bring my son to the beach before he passed? I don't think so. So why am I having a dream about it now?

I don't know, and honestly, don't care. Carter is here with me, enjoying the warmth of the sun. He was such a happy baby. He was my saving grace actually. If it weren't for Carter I don't know where I'd be. Having him changed my life. It smartened me up, gave me goals, even after he died. Everything I do is to make that boy proud.

A piercing scream jolts me, pulling me away from my perfect dream. I scramble to turn on the light but can't seem to do it. The bedroom door swings open as Julia flails and wails about on the bed, clearly in one of her PTSD night terrors.

Paul rushes in and turns the light on for me.

"It's a bad one." I move away from Julia like trained to do and sit up.  Nate moves in but I shake my head. "You're not supposed to wake her up when -"

"Don't care." Nate sits on the bed and pulls Julia into him. No matter how many times we all tell him going near a person who is in the middle of a night terror is a bad idea, he still does it. Every single time.

"You got this, boss?" Paul scratches the back of his head and yawns. He has washed his hands of Julia and just wants to go back to sleep.

"Yeah." 

"Gallo, grab your pillow. I'll get you set up." The bodyguard mumbles. I nod and look down at my dog.

"C'mon girl." I tiredly drag my pillow out of the room with Maggie following behind. "He's never gonna learn." I mutter.

"Leave him. In a few days he'll be gone and it will be the two of us dealing with these middle of the night wake up calls." Paul grunts and sets me up on the pull-out couch.

"Then will you take Julia back?" I smirk while watching Paul head to the Murphy bed.

"Goodnight, Gallo." 

I laugh a little and fall back to sleep, hoping to continue the dream with my son.

******