*James*

In a way, I'm glad Nate and Julia aren't here to witness this. Because every time I get mail like this I break down. Last thing I need is to stress Julia out and I really don't want Nate of all people seeing my cry. Paul and Julia have been gone for a good half hour yet I'm still a whimpering mess. Jeremy is with Mike who had to be transferred to his room for an IV so he's not here either. Trevor, Trisha, Casey, Evan and Jonah are with me in the backyard.

"James, how often do you get letters like this?" Trevor asks while passing the envelope to Jonah like it's fucking Show & Tell Day at preschool. I shove my palms in my eye sockets and both Trisha and Casey sit next to me trying to console me.

When Jonah looks at the piece of mail his eyes widen.

"Not often, but enough." I mutter. "This is his way of showing me he is always in control."

The envelope gets handed back to me but my hands are too shaky to hold it and it drops to the ground. The photo falls out and I have to look away.

"Can you show the police?" Jonah picks up the paper photo and studies it once more. It's not the photo that scares me as much as the handwritten caption underneath it.

"I've tried. We've tried. Joe has friends on the police force. He donates a lot of money to them. Money that should go to my mom."

"Yeah but-" Jonah continues.

"There's got to be something you can do, James." Trisha doesn't get it either. This is out of my control. I see Jonah look down at his phone and his shoulders sag.

"They found Nate." His eyes gravitate to Trisha. That's all she needs from him.

"No..."

Trisha doesn't cry often. Not at all. So when she does cry, it's hard to watch. Now not only am I crying about my sadistic father, but Trisha is crying over Nate. Trevor catches on to what's happening now.

"Paul said he's in rough shape. Mac and Natalie tried to talk him out of it but there was no getting him to stop." 

"He fell off the wagon?" Evan, still being fairly new to the group, asks and Jonah nods.

"Yeah, he's down a whole bottle of whiskey in one sitting." Jonah reads from his texts.

"Shit."

"I can't do this." Trisha gets up and heads inside Julia's apartment. Evan and Jonah both follow. Casey and Trevor remain with me.

"This day just keeps getting better, huh girl?" I lean over and pet Maggie.

"I'm sorry you all are going through so much, James. If there's anything I can do to help or even just someone to vent to, I'm here for you." Trevor pats me on the back. "It's sounds like you all have a lot going on."

"They ALWAYS have a lot going on." Casey says in her unfiltered way.

"Yeah, but this whole thing with your dad... James, I know you go to all the group sessions here and take advantage of all the Avalon has to offer, but if you would like a one-on-one session, I'd be happy to take you on as a patient while you are stuck here."

"Really? You'd do that?" I perk up a little. I know some people don't believe in counseling. People hard like my sister Ashley. But I find it helpful, and my mental wellbeing is important. I'm always trying to find ways to better myself in every department of my life and emotional health is just as important as physical health in my book. Especially when you have endured living with someone like Joe Gallo. You need as much healing as you can get.

 "God knows Julia isn't giving me the time of day. Either way I am here, and I am getting paid. I spend more time with you as it is, might as well put what I learned in college and medical school to good use."

"Thanks Dr. Tremont. I may take you up on that offer. But Julia comes first." I remind him, letting him know the minute Julia does start opening up to the idea of using Trevor, she comes before me. Always.

*******

*Trisha*

I pace the living room of Julia's apartment, not so much mad at Nate but worried about him. He's his own worst enemy. Doing crap like this could kill him. Doesn't he get that? Julia's not fucking worth it! She's not worth his life!

"Trisha, why don't you sit down and take a breath." Jonah is in nurse mode. He's seen enough emotional shit today. He doesn't need me adding on to the pile. I do sit down, and I do take a deep breath.

"This is the type of immature stuff he can't afford to do." I cross my arms over my chest. Evan sits next to me and Jonah sits on the recliner.

"It's an addiction, Trisha. A crutch. When you don't know how to handle things in a healthy way you handle them the only way you know how to. In Nate's case, drinking. Believe me, I get your frustration but remember, I also understand Nate's point of view too. I'm two years sober but there have been plenty of times I've wanted to run to the nearest bar and drown myself in whiskey. That's why I couldn't go to that pub today."

"You are in recovery?" Evan didn't know this about the nurse. How would he? It's not something anyone ever talks about. "You look like you have it all together, my man."

"There was a time I didn't. Far from it. Almost cost me my career, my life." Jonah opens up a little more. "In either case, sometimes it takes a lot of self-control, something Nate doesn't possess."

"He sure doesn't." I scoff. "Do you know how hard this makes MY life now too? He's going to have to come down from his high sooner or later and it's not going to be pretty. And what if someone finds out? That means his job and management gets involved. Media attention. That means I'm the one who has to smooth things over with Richard, contact Elliott. What if Nate has to go through detox? That means I'm the one who has to cancel interviews and meetings and reschedule his whole fucking calendar. He doesn't think of that shit though, does he!!"

"No. Not in the moment he doesn't. The only thing he is thinking about is feeding his addiction. Feeling numb. It's a disease, Trish. Like Cancer. There is no cure for addiction. He doesn't mean to make your life harder or hurt other people in any way. He's not thinking clearly."

"He's never thinking clearly when he's thinking about Julia." I scoff again, pulling my ponytail a little tighter then crossing my arms, ready for battle.

"Maybe you shouldn't be here when they return. I'll stay. Evan and Casey can go back home with you. Go get some Chinese food and watch a movie or do something to decompress. I have a feeling the second you see Nate......or Julia....you'll lose your cool, say something you may later regret." Jonah says calmly.

"Oh I'm gonna say something all right..."

Jonah is right though. I'd just be adding fuel to the fire at this point. The last thing I want to see is Drunk Nate. It's hard to watch him hurt his body like this. And anything I say while Nate is intoxicated will go in one ear and out the other.

"Chinese sounds good to me." Evan perks up a bit and nudges me. He knows it's my favorite too. I'll never turn down some good chicken fried rice and crab rangoons.

"Yeah, you are right." I give in. "So you will stay here and make sure Nate is ok? Bring him home once he is sober?" I turn to Jonah.

"I will make sure he is ok and we will have Ren bring us home once he's sober. He may be a little emotional though. A lot is going on in that head of his. I know you and Julia are not the best of friends, but remember, Nate just lost his fiancé. Regardless of if you two are friendly towards each other. It's a substantial loss."

"You think she's doing the right thing, don't you?" I peer at the nurse.

"No. I mean, I don't know. I never imagined Paul to be in the mix at all. I've always been Team Nate. Everyone knows that. He loves Julia. With all his heart. But I also get how Julia is planning ahead and know what she needs for her own healing. The two of them together? Right now? With him ready to travel around the world and her here at the Avalon? It'd be too much of a strain for them both to try and make things work out. Maybe if the timing were different or Nate was ready to settle down...."

"Nate loves what he does. She can't ask him to give that up. What a thing to do if that's what she's expecting out of him!"

"Nobody is telling him to do that, Trish. That's why Julia probably called it off. She would NEVER tell him to do something like that. Julia doesn't ask anyone to give up anything for her.  She puts everyone else before herself, you know that."

I do know that. I remember not too long ago Julia didn't even want to bother anyone to help her go shopping for basic supplies while she lives here, shampoo, conditioner, all the regular stuff, because she didn't want to bother anyone. She doesn't like to ask for favors. I need to start being kinder to her.

But the girl needs to stop taking everyone I love away from me.

*****