Time for dinner. Tristan's and Winona's family are here as expected. They are having a fine dinner in a local restaurant. They just finished the main course when Tristan clears his throat.

"I'm really thankful for attending our small dinner in celebration of our 10th anniversary. And also, I have to say something." Tristan stood up as he spoke. The music in the restaurant changes to slow music as he offers his hand to his girlfriend, Winona.

Everyone is confused about what Tristan is doing. Lilianne has an idea. Maybe this is where he proposes. She thought.

Winona giggled as she accepted Tristan's offer to slow dance. "What are you doing? We're the only ones dancing."

"So what? Is it wrong?" Tristan smiles as they continue dancing, not minding the other people looking at them and their family being happy for them.

Winona was about to go back to her seat when the song ended but Tristan stopped her. "Why? Are we going to dance again?" she asked

"No, I just..." Tristan kneels down on his knee which earns a collectible gasps in the whole restaurant. Lilianne smiles sadly at the sight.

"Oh my God, what are you doing?" Even though she has an idea about what he is about to do, Winona can't help but to ask surprisingly.

"Winona Roberts, you have always been a part of my life and I want you to still be a part of the rest of my life. You are not just my girlfriend but also my best friend, my soulmate, my roommate, my everything. You name it." Tristan pours his heart as he speaks. He pauses for a while to get the ring he hid in his pocket. "And now, I also want to call you my fiancee and later on, my wife. Will you marry me?"

"Aww, Tristan. Of course! I would love to spend every moment of my life with you together for the rest of our lives." Winona answered as Tristan put the ring on her finger.

Tristan stands from the ground as he and Winona hugged – exchanging kisses and I love you's. Everyone in the place are witnesses to the romantic scene that just happened. The place was filled with cheers, claps, and congratulations.

They went back to their seats as they continued eating. Winona is seated between Tristan and Lilianne. They are chit chatting, catching up with each other's life when Winona's phone rings.

She answered. "Hello?... I'm with my family... Is it really needed?.. Okay, I'm on my way."

"What was that?" Tristan asked.

"I'm so sorry but I have to leave now. It's for work. Something came up and they need me." Winona answered.

"Do you really have to go?" Lilianne asked.

"But it's your day off today." Tristan, still trying to stop her from leaving.

"It's nothing new. I'm fine." Winona reassured.

"Do you want me to drive you?" Tristan offered.

"No, It's alright. Don't leave Lilianne and our parents here. I'm really really sorry. I'll make it up to you all next time." Winona kissed Tristan goodbye.

She also bid goodbyes to everyone as she left the restaurant.

——

The dinner is over. Everybody went home. Tristan offered Lilianne a ride home which she gladly accepted.

They are both quiet the whole ride. Maybe because it's already late and both are tired. But for Lilianne, only one thought is lingering on her mind. Tristan, whom she loved more than as a best friend, is now getting married.

She tried to erase her feelings. She tried to move on. She tried dating a few boys in highschool and college but didn't last long and didn't end up well. Now, she focused on her job. She tried to be busy. She forced herself to be happy for the two. Well, she is but there is still a part of her that is not genuinely happy. After everything, she is still into Tristan and only she knows.

"Thank you for driving me home." Lilianne thanked Tristan when they reached her apartment.

"Sure, anytime." he respond.

Lilianne opened her mouth, trying to speak and finding the right words to say but no words left her mouth so she closed it again.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Tristan noticed Lilianne's uneasiness.

"Uhm.. It's just.. No, nothing. Thank you again. Bye!" Instead of saying what's really bothering her, she just turned around and was about to open the door beside her when Tristan spoke again "You know you can tell me anything, right? I'm your best friend."

Yeah, bestfriend.

She looked back at him with sadness in her eyes.

"Come on, just tell me. I don't want to leave you like this." Tristan pleaded, worried about the sudden change in her mood from back at the restaurant.

Is this it? Will she really gonna finally tell him?

"Come on, Yanyan. Just spill it. We never had secrets from each other, right?"

"Yeah, just this one."

"And what is that?"

"What? Did I say that out loud?"

"Please tell me. I'm really worried."

Lilianne heaved a deep sigh before responding, "Do you remember the time you and Winwin confessed to each other?"

"Of course! How could I forget that?" Yeah, of course. Dumb Lilianne. "We exchanged letters in our class. It was an activity or is it a project? I don't really remember the details much. Why?"

"Do you remember whom I gave my letter to?"

"Didn't you just keep it?" Yes, I kept it until now. "Did you give it to someone else? I don't remember. It's been a long time." It is. But it just feels like yesterday to me. The biggest regret of my life.

"You're right, I wrote it for myself."

"Oh, right. I remember. That's really brave of you back then."

"You think?"

"Yeah! Self love wasn't really a big thing before so if you wrote a letter to yourself, people will think you're a narcissist."

"Ah, yeah. But..."

"But what?"

Lilianne gulps. "It wasn't really for me. I wrote it for someone."

"Then why didn't you give it to someone?"

"I wrote it to you." Lilianne has no idea where she got the courage to say what she had to say a decade ago. "Fuck!" She curses upon realizing what she just had said.

"What?" Tristan is shocked. So many things entered his mind but he only got to say one word.

"Look, I'm sorry, I didn't have to say that?"

"Isn't what you wrote about loving... yourself?"

"Please, just forget about it."

"I can't just pretend nothing happened. Why didn't you gave it to me? Tell me, please."

"What do you want me to tell you? That I like you? Scratch that. I love you. More than friends. Yes, I've been in love with you for the past decade even though you are dating my best friend. But you two just confessed to each other! I didn't want to make a scene. I'll be embarrassing myself in the class if I did that." Did I just... Yes, I just did. "Fuck it! I'm sorry. Just forget it." Lilianne cannot look at Tristan's eyes while saying that. She doesn't know how he looks at her. Maybe with pity? Or disgust? She doesn't know. She just wanted to escape the scene now.

She turned around to open the door beside her but it was locked. "Unlock the door, please." She swallowed an imaginary lump in her throat preventing herself from crying.

"I also have a secret." Tristan started, not looking at Lilianne while she was doing the same "The letter I wrote back then wasn't really for Winwin. It's for you."

"What?" Lilianne looked at Tristan but he was still looking away.

"Yeah, I was also in love with you back then."

"Why didn't you give it to me instead?"

"Winwin just confessed to me. I don't want to embarrass her in front of the class. I was scared. It was highschool. I don't even know if you feel something romantic to me. What if you don't? Then I just embarrassed myself in front of the class too? Like you, I don't want to make a scene. You know what being rejected in highschool feels like. I don't want to tell Winwin."

"Did you tell her?"

"No."

"Isn't that cheating? Isn't that lying?"

"Didn't you do the same? Isn't that betraying your friend?"

Lilianne scoffs. Come on! Why do you have to say it now? Lilianne closed her eyes and inhaled as she spoke. "So you don't love her?"

"I love her now."

"But you don't really love her from the start."

"The beginning of our relationship was hard for me. I faked my feelings for her. I try to find the right time to tell her that I don't feel the same way but I was a coward. I don't want to hurt her and lose her. She's my best friend too. But you know, fake it till you make it. One day, I just realized that I'm not faking it anymore. I'm really in love with her."

"We had a chance." Her voice cracked, thinking about the possibility of them being in a relationship. Her eyes become teary.

"But we were both scared to admit our feelings and lose a friend." he said in a sad tone

"Unlock the door please." she said as she tries opening the door again

"Are we good? I don't want us to sleep while we're on bad terms."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to lose you. You're special to me."

"Fuck it! I'm not your girlfriend. Just let me open the goddamn door!" She lost it. She shouted as tears started falling from her eyes.

The car was filled with silence. That's when she realized it's really late at night and even the surroundings are just dead silent.

She hears an unlocking sound. She immediately opened the door.

"I'm sorry." she heard him say before completely shutting the door

She immediately left the car without looking back, running back to her place while tears uncontrollably falling from her eyes.