Honestly I have not  hurt this bad before

but now I know for the future 

I will never again show myself anymore 

because honestly it hurts

I don't want to be seen as a fool

but I don't believe in love anymore

and I will never let myself be used as a tool 

because we all know what would be in store

I hate myself for loving you

I hate myself for thinking that I should wait

but I have my own needs too

and I will not take your bait

You said you are changing

well now so am I.

So you don't have to worry about my staging 

because to my old self I say goodbye

I have it dead set in my mind 

who I want to be

you will no longer find

because now i'm the old me.

Why should I wait?

You'll be someone new

and I'll still be wrestling with fate

because we both know I can't satisfy you

Fuck why do I do this shit to myself?

Why do I pray that this is a nightmare?

Oh my god I hate myself

why do I have to feel this tear 

Why do I cry over you?

when everything was apparently fake

How do you expect me to be near you?

it's probably the one thing I can't take

If i'm not what you want

and you're not who you're supposed to be 

you don't have to make the taunt 

that we will stay the way we're meant to be.

**

The song is a song I feel right now... That and all alright by Fun. But yeah, go me, two updates in one day....