I realised my best friend who I've known for years is more of a stranger that I barely know.

And something about that fact makes my heart ache in a horrible sad way

"I'll stay in contact" but I dissapointed myself every time I said that because I never really did.

And reaching out when I feel like it hardly seems fair, it seems more selfish than anything.

A broken conversation over many months isn't what I remember but why cling on to something I won't get back

My own twisted mind made me dream about her saying she'd always love me and that hurt

It felt like a goodbye. I'm mostly angry at myself. For letting myself do this by not living up to my promises. And what did I have as an excuse? Instagram?

It just feels like a broken heart and if I could go back I would in less than a heartbeat. Now I've lost someone I loved and I don't think I'll ever get it back.