I ____ him

What shall I
Fill the blank with?

Love?
No
Maybe?
I don't know.
Am I ready to use that word?
Make that commitment,
When I don't know how he feels

Hate?
No
Not him.
I hate the butterflies
He gives me.
Hate the way I wonder what I
Should've, would've, could've
Said or done
After every conversation.

Like?
I more than like
His smile,
His laugh,
His personality,
His eyes,
His jokes,
His hair,
His everything.

How do I
fill in the blank
When I don't know
How he filled his?

How do I
Fill in the blank
When if he rejects me
I don't know if I
Could bounce back?

How do I fill in the blank?

How do I fill in the blank?