What is this because it's not love

Laughing turned to crying
Hugs turned to punches
"Paint your face"
"No jeans"
"Hair down"
It started at 11 years old
I just wanted you to be happy
"U look like a boy"
"Don't wear that"
"It's only cause I love you"
Cheating lying bastered
You stole my life
I left the things I loved
Because I loved you
"Scream and I'll kill you"
That cold wall
In the dark hall
After that day my life ended
My childhood ripped away at 12 years old
I ran from you and prayed you would never touch me again
Now almost 4 years later
I know that was the farthest thing from love
That year and half was hell
A hell that will follow me for a lifetime

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