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Under the moonlit night, our eyes meet again for the longest time. It felt like years to me, when it hasn't been that long since I last stood face to face with him like this. I miss him so bad. I love him. But why can't even say that to him?

"Y/n..." Jungkook uttered.

The words doesn't come out easily from my mouth. The part of me who has been telling myself that I don't deserve him, that I don't belong with him is putting up the wall again. He's a shining human being. He's out of my league. But my feelings, my indisputable feelings are fighting to come out. I want to tell him. I want to let him know. Even if he doesn't want it, even if he only looks at me as a no one, I want to end my suffering. Once this is all out, I can move on and accept the truth that he'll never be mine.

"I miss you," with all my guts I told him.

He stands there unmoving, with an unwavering stare.

"I've liked you for the longest time," this time I can't hold back the tears. "I've been the same as all of those girls who wanted to get your attention. I've deceived you into thinking I was different. But I'm completely the same as all of them. And I'm probably worse."

I decided not leave anything else. All these feelings for him. All these pent up frustrations. I will let him know all of it even if it buries me to shame, I don't care anymore. "Cuz I've fallen in love with you. I love you Jungkook. All this time, all this time I was only dreaming that you'd love me back. That you'd love someone like me back. That night, I wanted to give it to you. I truly do. But I got selfish and thought, I wanted you for myself. That if I give myself to you, you'd have to be with me. And I won't be letting you go. I have to have you all to myself. And that thought scared me. That I'm gonna turn into something I hate and hurt you in the end. I just couldn't do that. So I turned away."

I approach him and look into his eyes, this time no more pretence, no more lies. "I love you Jungkook. And if you feel disgusted with me after hearing all of this now, you can hate me. That would be so much better for me than living into a fantasy with endless longing for you. I'll accept it. I'll accept everything so please, just earnestly throw your hate at me."

I close my eyes bowing in front of him. I expected to hear a lot of hate. A lot of cussing and cursing cuz I betrayed him like everyone else. And I heard just what I deserve.

"I can't believe you're just a liar y/n. Here I thought you were the one who could understand the real me. All this time, I was hoping you weren't like them. And I believed it. It's kinda hard to think that you pulled it off perfectly, one big clap for you for successfully deceiving me. You were outstanding."

More tears just fall continuously down in my cheeks. I deserve this. I can't even blame him. I need to hear it directly from him.

"Those were the words in the back of my head," he added, with a soft voice.

I don't know if I'm mishearing things. But when I lift up my head to look at his face, he's staring down at me so dearly, with a soft smile, that melts my heart away.

"Jungkook..."

"I should hate you. Right? And I should be leaving right now but I wonder why my feet aren't dragging me?"

It's almost unbelievable. But he's standing right in front me and my eyes and ears aren't deceiving me.

"And why do I feel like I want to hug you?"

He then envelopes me in his strong arms and pulls me close to him. I also feel him putting a light kiss on my hair, then I start to question if this is still reality cuz my heart is beating so fast while burying my face on his shoulder.

"I knew all along. I knew you liked me from the start. But even if you did, you kept pushing me away. You kept throwing uncute words at me. You didn't listen to my words. You didn't put any efforts changing yourself for me. You didn't look pretty for me. You only kept on being yourself."

As if he's complimenting me while his arms are still wrapped around me. It felt so surreal.

"And all of that made me stay. It made me want to stay with you more."

He lets go and faces me, brushing strands of hair from my face. "I only planned to kill some time with you at first but everything changed when I got to be with you. You were hiding your feelings but I knew you're real. That what you're showing me is real. That how you're treating me is real. That everything about you is real. And I'm lying if I say I never felt I liked you."

I listen to him not caring about a thing in the world. The man I love is telling me things I can only dream about.

"And I missed you so bad that's why I'm here. And if this is not love, then I don't know what this is. All I want is to be with you again. All I want is your attention y/n."

He looks deep into my eyes and I can't stop crying again. Do I really deserve him this time? "Are you really okay with a girl like me?"

"We're not okay all the time aren't we? It doesn't have to be okay all the time."

Nodding at him, I just feel his arms around me again. "Let's be together this time. Let's be together for a long time," he added. "I love you y/n."

Hugging him back, I cry all of my happiness out. We're finally together. He's finally with me. And he's finally noticed the real me and loved me back. That's the best thing ever. "I love you Jungkook."

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Jungkook and I start dating after that night. I know it's hard to believe, that a dull, alien weed like me is dating an amazing, absolute guy like him. But it's real. This time, I'm not dreaming. This is my reality.

I watch Jungkook at the side as he talks to Yoongi at the counter, trying to convince him to hire him so we could be together even at work. Yoongi has been telling him no, but Jungkook doesn't falter even after almost two weeks persuading him.

I smile to myself. I know I've come a long way from being the nerd to actually being his girlfriend. And from that simple wish of him noticing me, I got more than I what I wished for. I don't know if he's gonna be with me till the end. I don't know if everything will work out for us all the time. I'm not sure if we'll still be together in the future. But one thing I know is sure right now. Jungkook has noticed me. And this is our present together. And this is worth everything.

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The end.

- nantokanarusa 19.04.06