"Are you sure we shouldn't wait for your husband?"

"Yes. I don't need my husband here." Hoori wrinkled her nose at her speech. Ever since she had woken up that morning, she had been speaking with a slight slur that she couldn't remedy no matter how hard she tried. She especially did not want Mikaeel to hear her talking like that. There was only so much humiliation she could take and she would rather not do it voluntarily.

"Okay." Dr. Krenak looked at her sceptically. But it was not his business so he happily kept his opinions to himself. "But let's just chat for a bit, okay?"

"Okay."

"How's your head feeling today? Better than yesterday? The aftereffects of lumbarpunctures can feel really awful."

"It's a little better today." She tried to smile at him but she wasn't feeling much like it.

"And what about you? How are you today?"

"Uhm..." Hoori bit her lip, trying hard not to feel panicked. "When I woke up this morning, I couldn't walk. I couldn't even take a step. The nurse had to wheel me into the bathroom." She felt so shy all of a sudden. She was completely dependent on another person and she hated it. Four days ago she could walk by herself yet there she lay, completely immobile and she didn't know why.

She hated it. She hated having someone help her to the bathroom or open the tap for her or squirt soap into her hands. She hated having them look at her body as they washed her with a sponge or brushed her hair for her. She was damned well capable of doing this by herself.

 So why couldn't she?

"I'm so sorry, my girl." He was often the pinnacle of professionalism but he felt so sorry for her. His daughter always shouted at him for being too soft. 

She smiled slightly at his reaction. "My grip is gone too. I couldn't pick up my toothbrush." She said sadly as she heard her voice. She just wanted answers. That's all she needed. She just needed to know why her body was breaking down. 

He jotted down a few more things in her file before he set it down on the table. "Mrs Ebrahim, I think we may know what's going on with you." He took readying breath, perching himself on the chair next to her bed.

"Uhm hmm." She could only turn her head to look at him, thankful that he sat in her line of vision.

"I know you're scared." He leaned slightly towards her as he spoke. "What's happening to you is not easy, I know that. Sometimes our bodies don't function as it should. These rare anomalies can cause a great deal of stress but I need you to know that this is not permanent." He spoke kindly to her. "Do you know why we perform spinal taps?"

Hoori shook her head.

"We need to do it in order to to test your cerebrospinal fluid." She looked up at him as if he was speaking complete gibberish. She had never taken biology in school for a very specific reason- She could never get it. "It's the fluid found in your brain and spine. It's sort of like a cushion that's protecting you brain from outside pressure and provides buoyancy and stability and..." He didn't realise he was rambling. "But that's besides the point," He cleared his throat, embarrassed at having gone of on a tangent. "What is the point is that your CBS fluid contains a little more protein than usual."

"Okay..." Hoori replied, prodding him to continue.

"It happens for various reasons but the symptoms you've shown and the rapid progression with which it occurred has helped us to narrow it down." He shifted the spectacles perched on the edge of his nose as he stared down at her. "I believe what you have is something called Guillain-Barre Syndrome."

Her eyes widened considerably at the unknown term.

" It's when your immune system begins to attack parts of your peripheral nervous system." He explained gently, noting her alarm. "Remember when I asked you whether or not you had any infections?"

"Yes." Her voice came out as barely a whisper.

"This is rare and we still can't explain why it happens but I suppose something within your immune system triggered it to attack your own body after it dealt with that specific infection."

"Oh." Hoori had to take a deep breath. She felt as if the room was suddenly just a little too hot as she felt sweat prickling against her spine.

"But like I said, it's not a permanent disorder," Dr. Krenak said quickly. "But it will still take a while for you to recover." He looked down at her, wishing she had someone to hold her hand. "It depends on you and your body."

Hoori still couldn't comprehend it. She had never even heard of such a thing.

"We don't have a cure but we can help to lessen the severity of it." He hated this part of his job. He never fully got the hang of truly helping his patients deal with a heavy diagnosis. "Do you want to discuss it now or do you want to wait for your husband?"

"I want to wait for my uncle." She was so sure her heart would fall out of her chest. She heard him say that it wasn't life-long but...

She was scared.

That's what it was.

It was a fear of the unknown and the fear that she would have to depend on someone else just to live her daily life.

She felt like crying but she needed to be alone for that.

"He's here. I can call him in if you'd like."

"Thank you."

She looked down at the phone on her lap. Should she do it?

"Hello, Mum. Are you there? I need you. I'm really scared Mummy."

...

Mikaeel didn't know whether or not to go to the hospital. Not after what Hoori had seen the day before. It just felt wrong. He knew she knew that he had gone clubbing with his friends and he knew that she knew he had danced very closely with other girls but she had never seen the evidence of it. He had tried getting her to go with him when they had just gotten married but she flat out refused.

Big surprise there...

He thought about how stiff she felt while he was holding her. She would never have danced with him the way those girls did. She just didn't have it in her but he couldn't complain. He didn't know who they were and maybe it was that anonymity that truly enticed him. For once, no one told him to do something or made him feel as if there was something wrong with him.

It was just him and her as they danced with the music pounding through their bodies, alternating their heart beats to the beat of the music. They moved faster and slower as the beats kept changing, drenching their bodies in sweat as they kept moving together.

And sometimes when they kissed him he would forget that he was who he was and he would lose himself.

That was the moment he lived for. That short, wild, mad, crazy moment that belonged to him and a nameless stranger that he would never meet again. He would never remember how she felt, nor would he remember the colour of her hair or how she smelt. He would never even remember the taste of the alcohol on her lips.

He would just remember that moment.

That moment in which he just was.

...

"You okay, Hoori?" 

"Not particularly." Hoori sighed. It was a heavy sigh full of the turmoil that seemed to drown her. "Did Uncle Ashraf tell you everything?" She didn't want to speak. She really didn't. She felt so embarrassed about the way she sounded.

"Yes he told me." Aunty Mariam sat down carefully next to her. "I was just thinking,"

"Hmm?

"Who would be home to help you?"

Hoori didn't know what to say. She would never, ever ask Mikaeel to help her.

She didn't actually want his help though.

"Mikaeel's busy with work and studying, right?"

"Ya."

"What about a domestic?"

"I only have a part time domestic. She comes Tuesdays and Thursdays."

"Do you think Mikaeel would mind if you stayed at our house for a few weeks? Just till you get back on your feet." Aunty Mariam hoped she wasn't overstepping her boundary but who else would help her? Her parents certainly wouldn't do it.

"Are you sure?" She hated imposing on her aunty but did she have any choice?

"Ya. If Mikaeel is okay with it."

"He'll be fine with it." She assured her aunty. She wouldn't even have to ask him- save for propriety's sake. She tried to smile at her aunty but her smile didn't seem to want to work very well at that moment.

"Then it's settled. You'll come home when you're discharged and Nandi and Tina can help you with showering and that." She smiled fondly down at her niece. "I'll happily brush your hair for you though."

"I wouldn't mind that at all."

...

"Hey man. You busy?" Ihsaan's voice sounded much too loud through his cellphone.

"I'm studying. Why?"

"Just. I'm craving ribs, you want to come with?" Mikaeel heard various murmurs through the phone. He figured Ihsaan was already there.

"You there already?"

"Ya."

"Fine order for me. I'll be there just now."

"Bring your wife with. Dahlia wants to talk to her." Ihsaan spoke just before Mikaeel cut the call.

" I can't."

"Why not?"

"She's still by her uncle's house."

"Oh okay. Nevermind then."

Mikaeel covered a yawn as he drenched his chips with vinegar. He was grateful he got study leave from the lab or he would have probably keeled over.

"What's wrong ?" Shuayb asked him, uncurling his arm from around his wife's open shoulders.

"Just tired." Mikaeel began to polish off his chips.

"Oh ya, our professor has his exams, ne?" Shuayb teased.

"Fuck off." Mikaeel grumbled. He wasn't in the mood.

"Don't be such a bitch." Shuayb looked almost offended at his friend's grumpy demeanour.

"Will you just let me eat?" Mikaeel looked back down at his food, intent on ignoring any more of Shuayb's rubbish.

"Fine. Sorry." He held his arms up in surrender. "When's the last time you got some, boy? You're so fucking uptight."

"Fuck off." Mikaeel dropped his share of the bill on the table before standing up to leave.

"Whiny bastard..." Shuayb grumbled. Mikaeel always was just such a moody son of a bitch and it got on his nerves.

"You seriously leaving because of Shuayb?" Ihsaan looked dubiously up t him.

"No. I'm leaving because I'm done with my food." He looked back at the table before walking away. "Sorry Dahlia, Hoori gave salaams. She wasn't able to come."

"Uhm," Dahlia looked up at him, confusion twisting her face. "Thanks..."

Mikaeel made sure to tip Shuayb's can closer to his mouth as he walked past causing his friend to start choking. "Motherf-" Shuayb spluttered. Why the hell was he even friends with him?

...

"Did Mum and Dad come yet?" Jannat asked as soon as she woke up.

"Ya. They were just here." Hoori gave her a watery smile. She hated lying to her sister. "They waited for about 20 minutes but you still didn't wake up so they left." She began digging through her bag. "Dad bought you a chocolate though."

She didn't mention that it was her own chocolate that she had hurriedly grabbed before leaving for the hospital.

"Oh." Jannat seemed to visibly deflate. "I really wanted to talk to them before they took me in for my scan."

"Do you want to phone them?" She offered her phone.

"Nah it's fine, I'll see them when they come back."

"Sure?"

"Ya. Now why don't you tell me about your exams? How did they go?" Jannat asked, desperate to change the subject.

"Perfect. You are looking at the next master of English literature." Hoori winked at her.

"Wonderful!" She beamed at her sister, words never truly expressing the pride she felt.

"... is a process that can take between 2 to 4 hours per session but the good news is that you won't have to be admitted each time. You can come in as a day patient and be gone before 12."

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" Hoori blinked her eyes as she zoned back into the conversation.

"The immunoglobulin therapy we discussed yesterday?" Dr Krenak looked down at her carefully. She was stuck in her own little world since the time he had walked into her room.

"Right, sorry." She apologised.

"I need to wait for the iv's to come though so we might only start the first session tomorrow. Then I'll keep you in for a day just to monitor you before we can discharge you."

"Great." She looked gratefully up at Dr. Krenak.  Hoori couldn't wait to get out of there.

"I need to ask about your support system at home. You'll need constant help, you know?" Dr. Krenak looked down at her kindly. Her husband didn't seem the type who would willingly sacrifice all his time for her.

"I'll stay with my uncle for a few weeks. They're planning to hire a nurse for the mornings though." Her words seemed so slurred at that point that she had difficulty even understanding herself.

"A nurse... hopefully in a week or so you might not even need her."

"I hope so." Hoori smiled up at him- or tried to but the muscles in her face wouldn't allow her to smile.

"I need to prepare you, though, Mrs Ebrahim. The next few days won't be very easy. It has to get to its absolute worse before the healing can start."

Hoori nodded, feeling her fears worsen causing her heart to feel as if it would explode right out of her chest.

Mum, where are you?

...

It was almost 7:30.

Should he just visit her?

It's not like she would actually speak to him.

Shit

Mikaeel snatched up his jacket and car-keys before storming out the door.

"You're seriously not going to talk to me?" He stood at the foot of the bed, losing any semblance of patience he had with her. "Was it because of what you saw?"

She turned her face to look at him, her eyes bright with apathy.

"Fuck this. I need to study."

She looked at him as if to say go ahead.

"See you."

She gave him a tight smile before turning her head to face the window yet again.

"Mikaeel." A warm hand gripped his shoulder, stopping him in his tracks.

"Yes Aunty Mariam?" He tried to sound polite.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes."

"Has Hoori spoken to you?" She looked at him, concern marring her forehead.

Mikaeel shook his head.

"I think she's feeling too shy to talk. Her slurring has gotten much worse since this afternoon."

"Slurring?" That was new.

She looked at him oddly. "Yes. Weren't you here this afternoon?"

"I had to work." He said stiffly. He had definitely filled his bullshit quota for the day.

"I see..." Though something in the way she said it let him know that she saw right through him. "I want to talk to you about something though."

"Yes?" He had to resist the urge to look down at his watch hoping she wouldn't speak for too long.

"Hoori is going to be discharged the day after tomorrow."

"Uhm hmm." He failed to mention the fact that he had been in the dark about such information.

"I know your townhouse has its bedroom on the second floor so I was wondering if Hoori could come and live with us till she was able to walk again."

Something about this woman unnerved him. "That's fine."

"Okay, then that's settled."

He couldn't walk away fast enough.

...

Leave it to Mikaeel to bring that up.

Hoori had surpassed the bounds of annoyance by the time he had left.

It hadn't been the first time she had ever caught the scent of someone else on him or saw the brushes of lipstick against his collar. She even knew where he had gotten it from but that  did not mean that she appreciated being reminded of it.

It was only a sick reminder of his depravity. He loved being with those girls and she had never truly wanted to compete with them.

She couldn't do what they did. She couldn't kiss Mikaeel like that. She didn't want to press up against him or bruise her lips against his till they were raw and chapped. She was soft and her kisses were soft and that's how they would always be.

His hands were hard against her back, pulling her closer to him than she was comfortable with.

She waited, trying to accustom herself to the feeling but it was too odd, too strange. She didn't like the way his hands pressed against her waist or the way his mouth pushed against hers. It was too rough and too demanding and she couldn't keep up with it. Then his hands trailed to her front to brush over her stomach before settling on her hips.

She gripped both his hands with hers, joining their fingers together, trying to soften the kiss but he wouldn't let her. His hands found its way back to her hips and she was sure he would leave red imprints on her skin with the way he way he was holding her.

"Wait, Mikaeel." She took a step back, trying to put as much distance between the two of them.

"What happened?"

"Uhm... You're hurting me."

"Oh. Sorry." He apologised.

"It's fine, just..." She stepped towards him, joining their hands together before she pressed her lips against his softly trying to keep it at her pace.

His phone began buzzing in his pocket.

"What Ihsaan?" He began walking away leaving her to breathe a sigh of relief.