(Alex P.O.V)

I don't trust John's father. It's probably wrong to say I don't trust my friend's father right after meeting him, but the man didn't seem like a good person. I went downstairs and stood at the bottom of the stairs, not sure where to go. Then a little girl grabbed my sleeve. It was Mary, the one who'd come in earlier.

"Martha wants to meet you." She told me.

"Where is she then?" I asked and Mary pointed to a tall blonde girl who was sitting in the kitchen.

I walked over and her eyes snapped up, she got up and walked over to me.

"So, are you Alexander?" She asked.

"News travels fast." I muttered, then raised my voice so she could hear. "Yes that's me."

"So, where ya from?"

"...New York." I told her, and she didn't seem to notice my pause.

"Cool, you going to college too?"

"Yeah, King's." I told her. "Law."

"Ooo, I'm working towards history, but I only just turned eighteen so I'm still not out of high school."

"History's a good subject, what do you think of the American revolution?"

"It's really interesting, especially Lin-Manuel Miranda and everything he did during and after the revolution. John leant me his book on Miranda by Hamilton, it was really good."

"Yeah, it was fun to write."

Her eyes widened and she looked at me. "Hold up, are you Alexander Hamilton?"

"Yes, that's me." I shrugged. "What else is new?"

"Your book was very good." She informed me.

"Glad you think so." I shrugged.

The conversation continued as we discussed the revolution, but I was just letting my opinions voice themselves, I was thinking about something else entirely. Not sure what I was thinking about, just a large mountain of recent events that I had to pick apart and classify. I mentally sighed and tried to get to work on it.

(James P.O.V)

I'd barely stopped pacing since Alex left, and once John followed it didn't make anything better. I wanted to be upset at my brother, I wanted to argue that it wasn't my fault he'd left me for dead, but I knew he had a point. Back on the island, I'd had a few friends, one or two people who were nice to me when I needed it. Alex never got that luxury; our father had preferred me, forcing Alex to sleep outside while I simply got hit once or twice. Alex has never had any friends, I was the only person he trusted once Mom died, and yet he always stuck around. He'd had the option to leave for New York multiple times, and he'd always stayed. Me matter how bad it had been for him, he'd loved our home and decided he'd only leave if we both thought it was crucial to our survival.

"James, please sit down." Eliza urged, but I shook my head. "John went after him, Peggy says he found Alex. Everything's ok, please James."

"But—" I started to argue.

"Liza has a point." Eliza's sister, Peggy, pointed out. "I spoke with John, they're coming back once Alex feels better."

I sighed and stopped pacing, hands playing with the hem of my shirt as a distraction.

I couldn't help remembering my brother crying as he yelled at me, or the way his eyes had hardened. I'd barely noticed it then, but looking back, I remembered seeing glasses perched on his nose. He had glasses? I knew he'd had trouble seeing far away, but he stopped mentioning it when was seven, and even before then it was never enough for him to comment on needing glasses. My heart lurched, has he been lying? We'd barely had any money at the time, and glasses most definitely cost money, but we'd have saved up if he told me it was actually a problem, was he lying about the seriousness of his trouble seeing?

"Hey Peggy?"

"Yeah?"

"Is his eyesight bad?"

"Yeah, he practically blind as a bat without the glasses, has been since he was small, at least, that's what he told me. I stole them once and he wandered around, blinking and squinting like he couldn't see shit."

I cursed myself, how had I not noticed? And with the amount he read, the eye strain probably made it worse. God I was not a good brother.

I don't remember much about what happened after the tree hit me, but I somehow know that Alex had come, and tried to stop the bleeding. I knew he rarely cried, and I was acutely aware of his tears mixing with my blood as he held my limp body. He was four years younger than me, I'd always been a part of his life, and he'd had to watch me die... except I wasn't dead. I'd believed he was dead too, I never thought my little brother could make it through the storm. But he was clearly alive.

"I feel awful." I informed Peggy, putting my face in my hands.

"Why's that? Or is there no new reason?" Peggy raised an eyebrow.

"He gave up on Nevis, gave up on our home, the place where he had a life. He moved to New York, and I remember him saying he didn't want to go there. He though I was dead and I saw the fear in his eyes. And I thought he was dead too, and continued my life, only occasionally worrying about wether or not he'd survived afterwards."

"Ah I see, so an old reason that has only surfaced now." Peggy leaned back in her chair. "If you want to talk to anyone, I'd say talk to Theo, she's majoring in psychology. Or John, he's just a good listener. Or Alex, he's good at aborting different subjects and making you temporarily forget all your problems. You should talk to Alex, it would probably help."

I sighed. "Peggy, I just met you and you're already a really good friend, why?"

"We've tried asking her how she makes friends too. She never answers." Eliza stated.

"It's my little secret. Plus, one of those fast-made friends is now my beloved girlfriend." She winked.

"Honestly Pegs, you get gayer every minute." Eliza sighed at her sister and shook her head fondly.

"That's impossible, I'm already the maximum lesbian." She smiled.

"What about me?" Maria pouted, appearing in the doorway.

"You're the second most lesbian lesbian." Peggy reassured her girlfriend.

"You're forgetting me!" Theo appeared out of nowhere.

"Wait, you're a lesbian?"

"No, I'm pan. Am I the most pan pan?" That sentence was confusing, but it made laugh.

"You're the best frying pan out there Theo, those non-stick pans can't hold a candle to your panness."

"Good, now don't tell Lafayette that."

"Don't tell Lafayette what?" Lafayette appeared in the doorway.

"Oh god, this is getting out of hand." I widened my eyes, relieved that they'd taken my mind off Al— ah nope, there we go again.

"Theo is the most pan pan." Peggy said matter-of-factly.

"I feel offended." Lafayette mocked offense.

"Well too bad, you're the second best pan."

"Well who's the best gay?" I asked with a smirk.

"Oh shit there's so many to choose from..." Peggy thought for a second. "I'd say John, then Herc, then James. No offense James."

"None taken, John seems far more gay and Herc has a boyfriend." I put up my hands, smiling.

"Angie and I are tied for omni." Eliza shrugged.

"And we only have one bi so the winner of the day is... drumroll please...." Maria laughed and did as her girlfriend instructed. "Alexander! But he's not here so he can celebrate." Peggy moped.

"Wait, go back, my little brother is bi?"

Everyone turned to me. "Yup!" Peggy exclaimed.

"I knew it! Mom owes me twenty..." I trailed off, remembering that my mom could possibly give me those twenty bucks from her grave, which Alex and I had dug in the forest by our house.

"I'll make up for it." Theodosia pulled out twenty bucks. "Here you go."

I smiled and took them gratefully. Theo did remind me of my mother, so it wasn't to much of a stretch for me to imagine them being one and the same.

"Oh, John and I owe Ria some money." Peggy winked at Maria, who smiled evilly.

"Why?" Lafayette asked, clearly confused.

"No reason." Peggy batted her eyelashes innocently. "Oh, we prepared you and Herc a special breakfast, but I guess you're eating it for lunch, it'll be cold, I'm not heating it up. Go get your boyfriend."

Lafayette gulped but did as he was told, eyes conveying fear.

Theodosia leaned towards me and hissed into my ear. "Maria and Angie prepares soggy broccoli cause Hercules and Lafayette wouldn't come down to eat their food last night."

Oh, they were in for a treat. Alex and I had lived off broccoli for a while, and since neither of us could cook, it had always been soggy. I sighed, thinking about my brother and all the hardships he'd been through.

Please forgive me Alexander.