Kyle...

I sat on the bench at the outside court, staring at nothing in particular. The voices of my friends sounded miles away.

The events of the past week were a lot, and I found myself having sleepless nights thinking about the decision I had to make.

I invited Paxon and Myles out to play some ball, hoping it would keep my mind off everything, but that obviously wasn't working.

"Earth to Kyle," I heard Myles' voice say.

I pulled myself out of my thoughts, and only now noticed my friends standing in front of me.

"Uh yeah?" I answered.

"What's going on with you man?" Paxon asked.

"Yeah, you've been kind of out of it since you got here," Myles added

This was something I was planning on keeping to myself, but what was the point of having friends if I couldn't talk to them about the stuff I was going through?

"Well, something happened a few days ago," I said and their ears perked up, "And it's kinda had my head going crazy."

"What happened?" Myles asked.

"Is it about that girl you met at the afterparty?" Paxon asked. "She was fine wasn't she?" He smirked.

"Not everything is about some girl Pax," Myles rolled his eyes.

"I actually didn't get to talk to the girl," I said, "She ran off before I got to the bar."

"No, you didn't, I saw you leave with her."

"Wait, that was the girl you were talking about? I thought you meant the girl in the gold dress."

"There was no girl in a gold dress."

"Oh there was, I know what I saw."

"No one cares if the girl in the gold dress exists or not," Myles cut in before looking at me "What happened?"

I sighed, ready to say the thing I never thought I would ever say.

"Anthony showed up at my apartment," I said.

"Anthony, your ain't shit dad?" Paxon asked.

"That's the one," I said.

"What the hell does he want?" Myles asked.

"Said he was sorry, and that he wanted to be in my life."

"'Bullshit!" Myles cursed. "Now he cares? When you're on your way to becoming the most valuable player in the whole NBA?"

"I was thinking the same thing too, but he seemed genuine," I said. "He even introduced me to his wife and said he wants me to visit Maine to meet his family."

"And you're gonna go?" He asked.

"I don't know man," I said, "It's a lot to process."

"I don't think you should," Myles said. "After all these years he's just now showing up? Like if it matters? Nah, screw him."

"So you wouldn't want to reconnect with your dad if he reached out?" I asked.

"Hell no! I want nothing to do with that man. He is dead to me," Myles said sternly.

Myles was my bully in school, and only when we became close friends did I realize why. His mother and his old friend/my other Bully's dad were having an affair. They were the ones my mom wrote her first big article on. Turns out his dad always knew about the affair and took out all of his anger on Myles. In turn, he took his out on me. It wasn't right, but I understood. He was always grateful that I never held it against him, it's why we're such best friends now.

When the story broke, his dad kicked his mom out. The drinking and abuse got so bad that Myles had to move in with his grandparents. He hadn't talked to his father since the day he moved, and had no intention of ever speaking to him again. He always seemed to have a hatred for father figures (except Eli) and always swore he would do better with his own kids.

"Well, I think you should at least give him a chance," Paxon stepped in. "Yeah he screwed up, but at least he wants to make things better. I wish mine gave a damn enough to show up, even if it's years later."

Unlike Myles and I, Paxon had no idea who his father was. His mother was never open about who his father was, but she always said that he knew about Paxon. There were times when he acted like he never cared, but there were times, like now, when he obviously cared and wished his dad would just show up.

"Listen, at the end of the day, this decision is up to you, it's your life," Myles added and Paxon nodded in agreement. This might be one of the few times I've seen them agree on something.

I thought talking to them would make things clearer, but it hasn't. But they were right, this was up to me and only I could make that decision.

"Do you guys think I should tell my mom?"

"Hell no!", "Definitely not!" They both answered.

"After what that man did to her, she's not going to want to hear a thing about him," Myles said. "She won't want you anywhere around him either."

"You're right," I agreed, "But I don't like hiding things from her."

"I know, but this might hurt her, like a lot," Paxon said. "Maybe you can tell her, but not right now."

"Yeah, that's what I plan on doing," I said.

"Can we go back to playing, please? I don't want to talk about ain't shit dads no more," Myles grabbed the ball that was at his feet.

"I second that," Paxon added.

"Well look at you two, actually agreeing on something," I teased.

"It'll be the last time that ever happens," Myles said.

With that, we headed back onto the court, and I tried my best to keep my mind off my predicament. But, I knew that soon enough, I'd have to make a decision.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I slowly walked through the park, headphones on, lost in the tracks of J Cole's "For Your Eyes Only" Album. I had just left the basketball court and decided to walk back to my apartment instead.

I pulled my hood up as I walked past the playground, not wanting to be spotted by the fans who were probably playing with their kids.

I was a few feet away from the end of the playground when something caught my attention. At the top of the slide stood this little boy, probably two, looking down nervously. At the bottom of the slide was, who I assumed, his father.

"Come Que, you got this," the man said.

"But I'm scawred Daddy," the little boy frowned. "It's too fawr," he pointed to the end of the slide.

"I know buddy, but it's ok, I got you," he assured the little boy.

"You shure?" his little voice asked.

"Yes, I'm sure," his father said.

His little body sat at the top of the slide, and his little lungs filled with as much air as he could muster before pushing himself off the edge.

His look of fear changed to one of excitement as he slid down. He landed right into his father's arms and quickly wrapped his little arms around his neck.

"You caught me Daddy!" he grinned.

"Of course I did," his father smiled. "I told you I got you."

I felt a wet streak running down my face, and it was only then that I noticed I was crying. This wasn't grown Kyle crying, this was 12-year-old Kyle who just found out his dad wanted nothing to do with him, and couldn't understand why. Why couldn't he have moments like this with his father? Why wasn't he good enough for his father to want him? I tried for years to push that little boy down, and it had been working, especially once Eli officially was my dad. But that little boy was always there, showing his face again and again, asking the questions that haunted him long before he actually knew what happened between his parents.

At that moment, a voice in my head said "You can still have those moments."

It was right. The younger me didn't have that chance, and it sucked. But the opportunity to have something like it was here, and taking advantage of it might be the best option. If not for grown Kyle, then for little Kyle, that needed to be healed.

I quickly walked away from the playground not wanting to be the creepy dude staring at kids. I then pulled out my phone and tapped Anthony's number.

"Hey Kyle," he answered on the second ring. "What's up?"

"I've made my decision," I said, "I'd love to come to Maine."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Yes, I'm back! Medical School is winding down and I finally have some time to get some writing done. Thank you guys sooo much for your patience. Updates will be more regular now (every 1 - 2 weeks). If you see me slacking, don't hesitate to comment or send me a message.

I really hope you guys like this chapter and are looking forward to many more!