#PTG44 Chapter 44

"Remember when I told you before that you love me more than I love you?" he asked, and I nodded as he was slowly taking my breath away... With every look, with every smile, he was taking my breath away. "It's different now."

I pressed my lips together as I fought hard to stay calm. But my heart wouldn't let me stay calm. I dreamed of this moment. Every day, every second. Palagi ko siyang naiisip... Palagi siyang nasa isip ko...

Years may have passed, but my feelings for him? That's the only constant thing in my life.

"You know... today's the last day of filing for this appeal," I said, showing him the envelopes and folders I was holding. "Can we talk about this later? Over a cup of coffee?"

Naka-tingin lamang siya sa mga mata ko. Parang ramdam ko ang kaba sa mga titig niya.

"But to calm you..." I began as I took a step forward. I tiptoed until I reached his ear, just enough to whisper, "Doesn't matter if you waited or now. I'm gonna chase you like how I chased you before. You're mine, Juan Alexandro. I hope you never forgot that." Then I planted a kiss on his cheek before I made way to the court.

Nakahawak ako sa taas ng puso ko habang naglalakad. Pilit akong nakikiusap sa mga tuhod ko na 'wag bumigay dahil nakaka-hiya kapag nakita ako ni Jax na nadapa right after I did that!

"Shit..." I whispered to myself as I took a turn. "After all these years... Grabe. Patay na patay ka pa rin, Katherine."

I set aside all thoughts of Jax when I was filing the case. It's different. I was just too careful with everything. Kaya naman seryoso ako habang kinakausap ko iyong clerk tungkol sa pagfa-file ng appeal. I didn't even know for how long I stayed in there. I just wanted to make sure that everything would be fine. Hindi biro ang manatili sa kulungan—be it for just a day or year—lalo na kung wala ka namang kasalanan.

"Are you done?"

Halos mapa-talon ako sa kinatatayuan ko nang makita ko si Jax na nasa labas ng pintuan. Naka-sandal siya sa may pader. He was wearing a suit and tie while holding his brief case. Nandoon pa rin iyong black rimmed glasses niya. I wanted to take a minute to appreciate how he looked...

Damn, Juan Alexandro. You really just get better with age.

"Yes," I replied, still looking at him in awe. Bakit... ang gwapo pa rin?

"Okay. Let's get that coffee," sabi niya. Tumayo siya sa tabi ko. Naka-tingin siya sa akin. Ayan... ayan na naman iyong unti-unting pagbilis ng tibok ng puso ko.

"No. I can't wait for the coffee," sabi ko nang hindi na ako makapagpigil. "Let's talk. Now."

He was watching me with that spark of amusement on his eyes. He looked so happy. And I love seeing him happy. Honestly? That's all I ever wanted for him.

"Okay," he replied again. "Ano'ng pag-uusapan natin?"

Huminga ako nang malalim. I postponed asking this for a long, long time. When I was in Alaska, nag-uusap kami ni Jax. Almost everyday. I left, yes, but I didn't leave him. He's still with me... He always reminded me of that. Hindi ko lang magawang itanong kung... kung meron na siyang iba. I couldn't do that to him. What if he fell in love with someone else while I was away? I didn't want to be mad at him for feeling something that's beyond control...

And who wouldn't want him? He's flawed... but damn, he has all the qualities to make up for it.

"Are... Are you seeing someone?" I asked as I feel my heart rose up to my throat.

Naka-tingin siya sa akin. I wanted to beg for him to just answer the question. I just wanted to know! I knew I said I'd chase him... but that would change if he's with someone else. As much as it hurt, I'd respect his choice.

"Yes."

"Ah..." sagot ko habang pinipilit na maglagay ng ngiti sa mukha ko. 'You heard that, Katherine? He's with someone else. Congratulate him, and exit gracefully. It's not his fault that he's with someone else. You knew that when you left to find yourself. Don't hold that against him. Be happy for him,' I kept on reminding myself as I stood before him, my face plastered with a smile. "Congrats..."

Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba sa tagal ng panahon, nag-iba na iyong ugali ni Jax, pero kitang-kita ko talaga kung paano niya pinipigilan iyong tawa niya. Bakit ba siya natatawa?! Kita na ngang hirap na hirap na akong magpaka-graceful ex-girlfriend dito...

"I was just kidding. I'm not seeing anyone. I waited for you."

I didn't know why, but I immediately hit him with the folders I was holding. "You asshole! Dami mong alam, ha?!"

Tawa siya nang tawa. "I just wanted to see your reaction."

"Ano, masaya ka?!"

He nodded. "So, you're back for good?" he asked, his face stretched widely from smiling. Sabay na kaming naglakad. We were walking side by side as we went from our court appointment. He was in his suit and tie while holding his brief case, while I was in my black pantsuit and holding my folders and envelopes. This was the dream. I was finally living the dream.

"I am. You remember the project I told you I was working on?"

He nodded. "Yeah. The one you didn't want to tell me."

"Yeah... Jinx ka kasi, baka 'di matuloy," tukso ko sa kanya. Inirapan niya ako. "But we're finally celebrating our first year. I'll invite you there para alam mo kung ano'ng pinagkakaalabahan ko before."

Maybe we were bad lawyers because we decided to call in sick and spend the rest of the day together. We just wanted to be together after all these time apart. You'd think na wala na kaming pwedeng pag-usapan dahil palagi naman kaming nag-uusap nung nasa Alaska pa ako, but for some reason, hindi talaga kami nauubusan ng topic ni Jax.

"Why are you laughing?" he asked. We were at my hotel room. Naka-upo kami sa kama.

"Nagsesend si Anj ng picture from the bachelorette party," I said as I laughed out loud again. Seriously? Gipit na ba talaga sa pera si Steele? Why would he even agree to dance for our friends?!

"You wanna go?" he asked.

Ibinaba ko iyong phone ko. Sinandal ko iyong ulo ko sa balikat niya. "Nah. I'll see them in Balesin," sagot ko. Tumingala ako para makita ko iyong mukha niya. "Are we back together?" I asked.

Tinignan niya rin ako. I was so tempted to kiss him, but I wanted to clarify things first. We're both older, but I was damn sure that our feelings never wavered. I never stopped loving him... and I was sure that Jax never stopped, too. Because if he did? We wouldn't be here. Not after everything that we've been through...

Only love is strong enough to allow us to brave all those storms.

"Do you swear not to force me to break up with you?"

I nodded. "Only if you promise not to put me first in everything."

He wrinkled his nose. "I won't promise that."

I frowned. "We'll go in circles. Because I know I'll put you first, tapos you'll put me first din. So, ano? Ganon lagi?"

He shrugged. "This is the only time that I'll use the patriarch card. Let me take care of you. No more discussion," he said, then he leaned in to kiss me. "I love you."

I smiled. "Ugh. I love you more—"

"Nah. I'm sure I love you most."

I groaned. "Ano ba?! Pati dito contest tayo?!"

He laughed. "You loved me more before, so be fair and let me love you more now."

"Tss. Ang dami mong alam."

He grinned. "Yeah... I learned a lot, Katherine," he said suggestively as he pushed me and hovered on top of me. He was looking me straight into my eyes. "I love you, Katherine Tyrese Arellano... soon to be Yuchengco" he said before he leaned in and really showed me all the things he learned while I was away.

* * *

To say that my friends' jaw dropped when they saw Jax and I arriving together would probably be an understatement. They looked shocked and confused and angered... probably because I didn't tell them that I'd be returning. But that's part of the surprise!

"Talagang kapag nagka-lunuran na, si Jax una mong sasagipin, no?" Matt said, his arms crossed over his chest.

I laughed. "Marunong ka namang lumangoy."

"Wow, what a friend, Kitty."

I hugged him. "Sorry na... but I'm back for good."

Sobrang daming tanong ng mga kaibigan ko. Hindi ko alam kung sino ang una kong sasagutin. I turned to look at Jax, and he said, "I'll catch you later." Ngumiti lang ako. Nakita niya siguro na walang balak ang mga kaibigan ko na pakawalan ako.

"Kailan ka pa nandito?" Anj asked.

"The other day lang..."

"Tapos ngayon ka lang nagpakita?"

I bit my lower lip. Paano ko ba papaliwanag 'to? Sobrang seloso pa naman ng mga taong 'to... I couldn't blame them, though. Ganito rin ako sa kanila, e.

"Tss. Malamang nagkulong 'yang si Jax at Kitty. Ano? May aabangan na ba kami in nine months?" Matt said.

Joey's eyes widened. "Seriously?! Napaka-landi talaga niyang si Jax!"

"Wow... Sa 'yo talaga nanggaling, Joey? Pagkatapos mong talunin si Psalm?" Steele asked.

Namula ang buong mukha ni Joey. "Psalm Christian!" sigaw niya bago nagsimulang habulin si Psalm. Tawang-tawa ako habang pinapanood sila na maghabulan.

This. This was what I missed.

"Pero seryoso, dito ka na talaga?" Anj asked.

I nodded. "Yes."

"Hindi ka na talaga aalis?"

I laughed. "Hindi na talaga, promise."

Nagsimula kaming maglakad papunta sa pagse-stay-an namin. My friends introduced me to their kids. They're so cute! Ang kukulit at ang lilikot! Si Steele pinaalala na marami na akong utang sa mga anak niya. 'Di pa rin nagbabago.

"Grabe, sobrang pagod na ako..." sabi ko nang maupo ako sa kama. Buong araw akong nakipaglaro sa mga bata. Sobrang dami nila kasi pati iyong mga pamangkin ni Psalm nandun din. I really had fun playing with them... Ganoong edad na rin kasi iyong baby ko kung nandito din siya...

"You kept on running around," Jax said. Naka-higa siya sa kama. Naka-sandal iyong likod niya sa headboard while he was reading something. He was wearing a white shirt and his boxers. I was so tempted to lay beside him.

"Ang cute nila, e..." Hindi ako naka-tiis, tumabi ako sa kanya. I wrapped my arms around his body. "Gusto ko na din ng baby..."

Tumingin siya sa akin. "Feeling mo candy lang hinihingi mo?"

I pouted. "Sperm lang naman idodonate mo? Ako naman mahihirapan."

Mas lalong kumunot iyong noo niya. "Are you being serious?"

I nodded. "Ayaw mo ba? May baby na silang lahat... Gusto ko rin ng maliit na version mo na pwede kong habulin."

At tuluyan niya ng isinara ang libro niya.

"So... you're saying that you want to have a baby first before getting married?"

I shrugged. "Tignan natin kung ano ang mauuna... Kung iyong baby ko... O iyang proposal mo..."

His lips parted. "You're really unbelievable... You were gone for years, back for not even a week, and now, you're asking me for babies and proposal?"

I nodded. I was shameless, sa kanya na rin nanggaling iyon. "Yeah. You said it yourself, gagawin mo akong Yuchengco... Tignan na lang natin kung sino ang mas mauuna sa atin... Kung iyang proposal mo ba o iyong mga mini Juan Alexandro ko..."

I hovered on top of him, and grinned. "Let's start with my project," I said as I leaned on him.

* * *

On the day of the wedding, I couldn't help but be in awe. The whole place looked gorgeous. It was a beach wedding and everything looked expensive. This was really... wow. Psalm really spent a lot for this.

"You should've told her you're coming back," Jax whispered. Magkatabi kasi kami. Maid of honor si Anj tapos iyong ibang friends ni Joey from med school iyong bride's maids pati si Andrea (na ka-close niya na pala ngayon... Life, huh?).

I shrugged. "Nah, it's fine. The look of surprise on her face was worth it," I said as I focused my attention back on the ceremony. Kitang-kita ko kung paano naiiyak si Psalm kahit naka-tingin lang siya kay Joey. Kitang-kita ko rin kung paano pinagtatawanan nila Saint at Austin si Psalm. Akala mo 'di umiyak nung kinasal?

"Congrats, Jo!" sabi ko habang yakap-yakap siya. We were taking pictures with the bride and groom—Mr. and Dr. Gomez de Liaño. Joey's just so radiant! Sobrang saya niyang tignan!

"Thank you, Kitty!" sabi niya habang yakap din ako. "But hindi pa ako nakaka-ganti sa ginawa mo! Babalikan kita."

I laughed. "Well, good for you because I'm staying for good na."

We took pictures—lots of it. Muntik na mabato talaga ni Joey si Steele dahil microwave na naman pala iyong dala niya. Medyo curious na ako... may investment ba si Steele sa pagawaan ng microwave?!

Pagdating namin sa reception, everybody was having fun drinking and singing and dancing. Jax and I were dancing in the middle. My head was resting on his shoulder. I love this. I love being like this...

"I love you, Jax... You know that, right?" I asked while we were slow dancing.

I felt him nodding. "I love you more... Don't argue."

I smiled to myself. Who would've thought that the guy I was just chasing relentlessly years ago? Iyong kailangan ko pa talagang magpapansin nang sobra sa kanya? Na dito rin pala kami mauuwi? After everything?

When we got tired dancing, I told Jax na babalik muna ako sa kwarto namin para magpahinga nang sandali. May after-party pa. And knowing my friends and Psalm's family, sigurado ako na hanggang madaling-araw pa 'to. Sobrang overflowing iyong drinks. Sigurado patay kaming lahat bukas.

Naka-tingala ako sa langit, tinitignan iyong buwan. I smiled. It's so beautiful. "Jax, tignan mo—" I called out to him, but when I turned to look at him, my tears began to form in my eyes as I saw him on his knee.

"Katherine Tyrese Arellano," he said, as he was looking me in the eye. "This proposal's supposed to happen a few weeks from now... I wasn't even done planning because you just surprised me three days ago... But you being your usual self... You just can't help but ask me for babies, huh?"

I nodded, smiling, as I wiped the tears that fell from my eyes. "I want little babies who look like you..."

"Maybe I'm traditional, I don't know, but I wanna get married first before you start popping babies..."

Tuluyan na akong natawa. "Really, Jax? Popping?"

He nodded. "You want babies? I'm down."

"Ilan?"

"As many as you want."

"Talaga?"

He nodded. "Yeah... I just have to work harder to feed all the babies you're planning to have."

Para akong tanga na tumatawa habang umiiyak. This was making my heart swell with happiness. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko sisimulan na sabihin sa kanya na papakasalan ko siya... Of course... Always...

But I started it with a single step.

And took the ring.

"I want a simple wedding... Just you and me... And our closest friends..." I said as I slowly slid the ring around my finger. Hindi ko na maialis ang ngiti sa mukha ko habang tinitignan ang daliri ko habang suot ang singsing na bigay ni Jax.

I couldn't help myself anymore. "I love you so much, Juan Alexandro Castillano Yuchengco. Thank you for this love. I will always be thankful for making me experience this kind of love..." I cupped his face, and kissed him so deeply, as deep as the ocean before us, as deep as my love for him.