Summary:

from trash to melancholy.

Notes:

thanks to my beta, the amazing Rachel @Raechem for her help <3

Err.. you might need an handkerchief at the end ^^'

Chapter X: Not my place

"Well, please, don't mind me and go on," the angel urges them.

"NGK! What?" Crowley stares at him stunned.

"It's more than evident that you were in the middle of something before, go on with that and pretend I'm not here... or don't, if you like the perspective of me watching you." the angel clarifies, with a grin, kissing the demon first and then the Doctor. "No more no kissing rule between us." he declares.

"Oooh, I like it, for sure, both of the things!" the Doctor grins as well. " I was hugging him, from behind, like this," he explains, catching Crowley off guard. "I had already done all the things you told me and I was about to improvise a little bit..." he goes on, his hands on Crowley's body once more.

"Oh, good, did you also caress him in that spot between the wings?" Aziraphale asks and Ten nods, lowering his hands to Crowley's crotch.

"Whaaaaat?! Did you ssssuggest to him to do that? What kind of angel are you?" Crowley wonders bewildered, as he jolts for Ten's touch.

"The kind of angel who wants you two to get a lot along!" Aziraphale replies, before kissing Crowley, as the Doctor is still busy caressing the demon everywhere.

Crowley seems to enjoy the situation for a while, but then he wiggles like an eel in order to break free from them both.

"What the bloody heaven are you two going to do to me? Aziraphale... d'you really inssstruct him to..ss..ssseduce me?" he hisses,

"Heaven yeah, and it seemed to work pretty well..." the angel smirks, pointing at the bulge in the demon' s tight trousers.

Crowley turns almost redder than his hair.

"That's' it. Ssssstay the heaven away from me, at leasssst for tonight. Both of you!" he storms away, sort of scared.

"And that one should be supposed to be a lustful demon, shouldn't that?" Ten comments, a little disappointed.

"He's a demon, I've never ever said he was a lustful one." the blond points out.

"What about this lustful angel? Is he up to play a little?" Ten murmurs, caressing his face.

"I'm always up for that!" Aziraphale beams, kissing him.

"You know what? I guess we have to slow down with Crowley..." the angel mumbles, between kisses. "This approach was a tad aggressive... he probably needs to get accustomed to the whole thing more slowly, gradually, bit by bit."

"Do you mean biting his lobe, then biting his neck, then biting his lower lip?"Ten murmurs, doing all the things he's enumerating.

"Funny alien, you know what I mean!" the other chuckles and the Doctor nods. "Now, I wouldn't mind continuing this biting speech in your room..."

"What about Crowley?" Ten frowns.

"Didn't you hear him? He wants to be left alone, let's just please him," he shrugs.

"Still very doubtful about who actually is the angel and who is the demon between you two!" the Doctor chuckles.

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The morning after, when they meet for breakfast, Crowley seems to be in a better mood.

"Crowley, I was thinking, what about showing Aziraphale what you learned yesterday?" Ten suggests, as he enjoys his beloved cereals.

"That... that I like when you lick my face?" Crowley wavers as he sips his coffee.

"Wait, what? I've never tried that with you!" Aziraphale intervenes, so surprised that he lets the biscuit he's holding fall into his cup of tea.

"Good to know, but... I was talking about what I showed you at Gardenya 4EG," the Doctor points out, quite amused.

"NGK!" is the only thing Crowley manages to say, amusing the Doctor even more.

"Why don't we show him that? Let's finish breakfast and then you'll pay another visit to my plants." Ten decides.

When they arrive there, things are pretty different from last time: the plants seem older, some of them have yellow leaves, some have spots or holes in their leaves, some lost all their flowers.

"Hey! These are not the same plants!" Crowley protests.

"Of course, they're not, that would be too easy." the Doctor shrugs.

Crowley walks towards the plants, slowly, taking deep breaths.

"Is this the bloody way to let yourselves go?!" he snaps and the poor plants start to tremble.

But then something triggers the demon and he changes his attitude.

"I mean, I'm sure you did your best, you're simply aging and such stuff can happen..." he adds, in a softer tone.

The plants stop trembling, even when he touches them.

"There, there, let me take away these ugly leaves," he says, ripping the yellow leaves, but as delicate as he can.

"Okay, who's this guy and what happened to my dearest demon?" Aziraphale asks Ten.

"What about you, no more flowers, right? Well, don't worry, I'm sure that new ones will come soon..." Crowley comforts another plant, before making a spray bottle filled with water appear. "Here we go, have some water, all of you..."

"Crowley, dear, are you okay?" Aziraphale walks towards his beloved, placing a hand over his forehead, before recalling that ethereal creatures like them can't have human illness.

"I'm fine, let's say that Ten showed me there are other ways I can talk to plants and other ways I can treat them," he grumbles. "When we are back, can I at least yell at my own plants? Not always, let's say once a month? You know... not to lose my touch." he tries to bargain with the Doctor.

"Deal," the Time Lord approves, chuckling.

- It's evident I can't change him one hundred percent... - he shakes his head, but deep inside he's fine with that.

"You know what, Crowley? I guess you'll try the new approach with your plants very soon, we're back to Aziraphale's library," he informs them, setting the coordinates.

When the TARDIS lands in Soho, London, the Doctor stares at the parked Bentley.

"You were babbling about your cd player playing only Queen songs, no matter what CD you use, so... do you want me to fix the problem?" Ten gently offers, drawing out his sonic screwdriver.

"Dare to try and I'm going to sssstick your heavenly ssssonic thing in meandersss of your body that, trussst me, you do NOT want to exxxxperiencce!" he hisses, as threatening as he can.

"For Gallifrey's sake, calm down! A 'No, thanks' was already a more than eloquent answer!" the Time Lord scoffs, putting his sonic screwdriver back into his pocket. "Okay, I'll leave you some time on your own, after I stole you from each other, you just deserve it." he decides, disappearing into his TARDIS.

"Hey, are you dumping us or something?" Aziraphale asks him out loud, knocking at the doors.

The Doctor opens them instantly.

"Whaaat?! Naaaaahh, I was sure I was doing you two a favor. My TARDIS and I are not going anywhere, I'll be just busy building stuff. Enjoy yourselves in the meantime!" he winks at them, closing the doors again.

"Didn't you hear him? Let's enjoy our time. Jump in my car, angel!" Crowley invites Aziraphale, kissing him.

"Can I try and lick your face when we are in bed together?" the angel eagerly asks, as the redhead sets the car in motion.

"I hope so, love!" he grins.

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While they're busy having their fourth mutual orgasm for that afternoon, Aziraphale and Crowley would expect anything but not the Doctor storming in Crowley's bedroom.

"Good news, guys!" he cheers, with nonchalance.

"NGK!" Crowley jolts, revealing a lot of himself.

"Good heaven! Doctor!" Aziraphale jolts as well, looking for shelter behind Crowley.

"Hey! Wait a minute, it's you who he's already seen naked, it should be the other way around!" a still utterly naked demon slides behind the angel's back.

"Oh well, I suppose you're right, after all!" Aziraphale thinks about it, calming down.

"Oohh, I enjoyed the view, both ones!" the Doctor grins, as Crowley resorts to a demonic miracle to dress up quickly.

"What the heaven are you doing in my flat? How the heaven did you find it?"

"Oh, well, you know, I invented a device that can detect the snake demons' temperature and given that you're the only snake demon around..." Ten winks at him.

"Oh, please, shut up!" Aziraphale rolls his eyes, wearing his shirt again. "Crowley, I happened to tell him where you live, probably he remembered!" he explains everything.

"Yes, I did!" the Doctor admits, giggling. "It doesn't mean I couldn't have invented such a device!"

"Of course, dear, you could invent anything!" Aziraphale nods, wearing his trousers.

"Okay, this explains how you found us; but... how did you get in?" Crowley questions Ten.

"Well.." the Time Lord confines himself to show his sonic screwdriver.

"Bloody heaven! I'll turn this whole bloody flat into wood!" the demon snaps.

"Oohh, this is such a mean thing to say" the Doctor pouts, insulted. "However, I saw your plants, oh my, I've neer seen such green, luxurious and healthy plants!" he congrats.

"Well, it's not the most polite thing in the world to rush into people's houses either!" the demon retorts, ignoring his compliment.

"Okay, both of you, let's just calm down, I'm sure Ten had an important reason to come here, right, my dear?"

"Sure it is, I built something for you, Azi and I wanted to show you!" he informs him, excited and the angel doesn't have the heart to tell him that that is not an important reason.

"So I'll let you reach another orgasm, if you please, but after that reach me at the bookshop!" he informs them, before walking away, leavin both of them stunned.


After a while (they accepted his advice of one last orgasm, after all), the Bentley reaches the bookshop again and the Doctor comes out of his TARDIS holding a weird tool.

"Well, Azi, you have such old stuff to work that I thought you might enjoy this little jewel: it can help you to make the inventory of your books, run balance sheets ... and if you click this button it can even make tea!" he explains, proudly, handing that useful invention to the angel.

"How can it be that he turns into MacGyver if we leave him alone for five minutes?" Crowley wonders, rolling his eyes.

"Actually it wasn't five minutes, more like half a day and four mutual orgasms!" Aziraphale points out, way too proudly.

"Anyway, don't worry, I'm going to leave you time for many more orgasms, I'll be away on my own for a while. Little while, big while, who knows?" the Doctor informs them, rather cheerful.

"Wait, nooo, why?" Aziraphale pouts.

"Because it's what you two need now. And what I need. I'll be back, sweetheart, I promise." he assures the angel, kissing him goodbye before leaving.

It's only a matter of seconds before Aziraphale and Crowley hear the oh-so-typical sounds of the TARDIS fading away.

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The Doctor said the truth, he has come back.

To Crowley and Aziraphale had been a week, no one knows how long the Time Lord has actually been away.

The Doctor never told them anything about it and they didn't investigate.

Ten asked them to follow him in any adventures through time and space and that's what they did.

In order to make Crowley more comfortable, Ten hasn't made advances towards him anymore and Aziraphale dedicated to his lovers the same amount of time.

After the umpteenth adventure, the Time Lord decides it's time to go back to London.

"Woah, I'd never thought space could be so much fun!" Crowley states, still thrilled. "Although, geez, Ten, you can't make me do so many good deeds. I might not have my faction anymore, but I'm still a demon!" he complains, annoyed.

"What? It's not me asking you to do all those miracles, quite the contrary, with you two everything is even way too easy, you know, sometimes troubles are better, and then I love running!" the Time Lord protests.

"Oh c'mon, dear, you can't tell us you didn't enjoy our little trick to the Daleks!" Aziraphale points out.

"Well yeah, now that I know that until their next generation all their dangerous weapons can shoot only sparklers, I'm quite relieved and they were all so pissed off, nice work, guys!" the Doctor agrees, chuckling at the memory.

"What about the Cybermen who were looking for the TARDIS? We referred to her with 'TTAABB' all the time and they suspected nothing!" Crowley brags. "You must acknowledge Aziraphale and I had been brilliant!"

"Okay, okay, probably you are among the best Companions I have ever had!" the Doctor agrees. "Happy now?"

"Well, rather than happy, I feel a bit peckish..." the angel murmures.

"Crepes?" Ten and Crowley ask him in unison.

"I might surprise you this time, but I was thinking something more ancient... what if I said Petronius ...."

"Restaurant in Rome BC? That's awesome, I couldn't ask for anything better, I looove the things he does to oysters!" the Time Lord approves greedily.

"Wait, what? Did you try them, too?" Crowley asks him, stunned. "That's it, now I want to eat them too!"

"Oh-oh, looks like someone finally accepted a temptation." Aziraphale winks at him.

"Looks like the problem about what to eat for lunch is solved." the Doctor grins. "C'mon, everyone on the TARDIS!"

------------------------------------------

Time goes by but after a particularly exhausting travel, the TARDIS needs a whole day of rest, with closed doors, in order to regenerate an essential component.

Aziraphale took advantage of that to go to collect some books he needs and he has decided to reach the destination by travelling the human way, he will be away for the whole day.

This means that Ten is at Crowley's flat.

"I'm getting bored!" the Time Lord complains.

He's been there not even for half an hour.

"I still don't get why you didn't stay at Aziraphale's bookshop!" the demon groans.

"Because I've already read almost all the books there, about the one I haven't read yet, well, there's a reason if I haven't." he explains.

"Okay, you know what? You can go check my plants, and be warned, I don't even allow Aziraphale to go to them!"

"Oohh, really?"

"Yep. Why don't you try to terrify them a little bit? It's fun!" the redhead suggests.

"This is not going to happen!" the Doctor swears, walking away.

He's back after a little more than half an hour.

"I talked to them, hydrated them... but now I'm getting bored again." the Time Lord informs Crowley. "What are you doing?" he asks, seeing him working at his laptop on his marble table.

"Very evil demon's ssstuff!" the redhead hisses.

"Do you mind if I do some chores?" Ten suggests.

"Do what the heaven you want, as long you leave me alone!"

This new matter takes the Doctor busy at least for a whole hour.

"That's it! I've cleaned the whole house, even that ugly stain at the entrance!"

"Whaat?! Did you really manage to remove what was left of Ligur?" Crowley asks him, stunned.

"I'm a very efficient cleaner!" the Doctor grins. "And you also had a broken tile, a leaking sink, and a bulb out. All fixed!" he informs the owner of the flat, as he waves his sonic screwdriver with badly hidden pride.

"Wow, thanks." Crowley answers, impressed.

"Tell me what you're working at!" the Doctor insists.

"Neeveeerrrrrrrrr!" Crowley growls, but it's too late.

It's enough to touch the laptop with the light of the sonic screwdriver to retrieve all the info about it.

"Oohhhh, a donation to a NGO for distant adoption of... ducks!" the Time Lord reads outloud. "I've never heard of such a non-profit-organization..."

"NGK!"

The second after, Ten is already by Crowley's side, peeping at his screen.

"Of course, it's not a donation you made, it's a donation you're processing, it's you the founder of the Slide Off NGO!" he figures out, beaming.

"Dare to tell Aziraphale and you're a dead Time Lord!" Crowley threatens him.

"Can I help you to process the donations?"

"Nooo!"

"But I'm getting bored!"

"It's not my problem!" Crowley retorts.

"Of course, it is, if you help me I won't be bored anymore and this won't bother you."

Crowley gives in, turning the laptop off.

"Okay, okay, galactic pain in the ass, how can I help you?" he wonders, walking closer to him.

"Let's do something together!" the Doctor suggests.

"Tell me, any idea of what could we do together?"

The brunet clicks his tongue at him.

Maybe it's the sexy way he's staring at the demon, maybe it's all the unresolved sexual tension between them, but something triggers him.

After rolling under the sheets for hours of passion, the Doctor can define himself as anything but bored.

Coherence is everything: during all the time there hasn't been a single kiss between them, only pure sex.
But there were all the sessions of biting stuff the Doctor had talked about, mutual biting, for the record, but Crowley demonically miracled all the marks away.

"How the bloody heaven could this happen?" Crowley wonders, still shocked, as he searches for his clothes.

"Well, Azi kept saying we had to find a way to get along, so..." the Time Lord shrugs, dressing up again.

"There are at least one billion different ways of getting along!" Crowley strikes back.

"Maybe, but this was the funniest!" the Doctor giggles. "However, don't ever tell Aziraphale." he adds, becoming serious.

The other frowns.

"What?"

"All this time I've talked about shared love and stuff like that, but the truth is that I've figured something out."

"What? What did you find out?"

"I saw you. More than six thousands years ago, on the wall of Eden. I came back to see you, there's where II was when I left on my own." he reveals. "I saw the first rain ever, I saw the way Aziraphale took care of you. You two were already so much in love and you didn't know it yet."

"Did you really go back to that day?" Crowley asks him, bewildered.

"Yep, I did. And there's nothing that can compete with a six-thousand years lasting love." he acknowledges. "Oh well, I could go back in time and meet Aziraphale at any age, making him fall in love with me over and over again..."

Crowley glares at him, his large, golden eyes reduced to two icy fissures.

"But I won't, it wouldn't be loyal and it's not what I want." Ten assures.

"What do you want, then?" Crowley asks him, now much calmer, as they both sit on his bed.

"I just want to find a love like that. But you know what? Rather than agree to my custody, the Master refused to regenerate and died.... that's the worst level of friend-zone or rather enemy-zone!" he grumbles.

"Oh, c'mon, I'm sure you'll find your special one. You know what? If only I didn't know my former Boss had already had an affair with Aziraphale's former Boss I'd suggest you meet Beelzebub or Gabriel... or if you don't mind not perfumed beings, there's Hastur... if he's still not mourning after Ligur. But maybe you prefer snobby guys, well there's Michael, that bloody archangel one day will need surgery to get that stick out of her ass!" the demon makes him laugh.

"So, what are you going to do now?" Crowley asks Ten, more serious.

"I'll go. It's not my place here. I thought it could be, but I was wrong." he grieves. "I'll leave tomorrow, once my TARDIS is ready. I wouldn't leave now not even if I could, not without seeing Azi one last time, without saying goodbye." he explains and Crowley nods.

-------------------------------------------

"You what?" Aziraphale asks Ten, bewildered, the morning after.

Ten decided to spend the last night with him and Crowley without revealing anything to the angel.

"You heard me. It's the best for all of us. But before I go I've got something for Crowley." he announces, before rushing to the TARDIS and coming back.

"Here, this is the most powerful fertilizer ever, it contains a drop from the Source of Messaline planet," he explains, handing a strange bottle to Crowley. "Make a wise use of it, but, remember, love is the main key." he retorts and Crowley nods.

The Doctor walks towards a crying Aziraphale.

"Why, Ten, why?" he asks him, sniffing.

"Aziraphale, I loved you so, so much and I always will, but the love you and Crowley have is so special and unique, I'd end up being just an intruder and I prefer you to recall me as pleasant memory." he murmurs, wiping his eyes, before one last, deep and meaningful kiss.

It's Crowley's turn to say goodbye, the Doctor stretches his hand but the demon avoids it, once more.

Just like when everything started between them.

The only difference is that the reason why the demon refuses it is that he prefers to pull the Doctor into a tight and long hug.

The Doctor looks at them both once more, before going into his TARDIS.

Aziraphale and Crowley hugs tightly as they saw the blue box disappear.

"We still have each other, don't we angel?" Crowley murmurs.

"Always, my dear," the angel whispers, kissing him. "Always."

--

TBC

Notes:

So, did you expect it?
Did you want something different?

Whatever your answer is, you'll find out what I plan in the next chapter, the last one ;)

Guess what? When Crowley were suggesting Ten who could be his soulmate, for a moment I thought about him saying: "You know, there's a place called Hogwarts, there's a wicked dark Wizard there, in the Azkaban prison, maybe if you get there in time you can save him and..." and then I thought 'geeeeez, noooo, the Barten (Barty/Crouch Jr)/Ten) shipping is in another story, LOL
Hugs