Welcome to a review for Soul Sadist by HeroHeroBahBero. I am your host, Pink, and these are my casual thoughts on the story so far. Take everything with a grain of salt please!

ꜰɪʀꜱᴛ ɪᴍᴘʀᴇꜱꜱɪᴏɴ

I think the cover is pretty nice and simple. It gets the point across. Nothing more to note with that. I'm not the best to speak when it comes to covers since I'm usually not picky with aesthetics. There's a vague blurb as well, but definitely still interesting nonetheless. This definitely hints at some potentially paranormal/fantasy elements, which is cool.

ᴏᴠᴇʀᴠɪᴇᴡ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀꜱ

Here is my general breakdown for each chapter so far. My thoughts drastically fluctuate and change with every section, so be sure to read carefully all the way up until the end. I only show these to give you my initial thoughts on each chapter so far as a reader.

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴏɴᴇ

This was an extremely entertaining and thrilling chapter so far. I like how it starts, I like the reveal of Mikasi being this P.I. and warden, and I like the confrontation that goes down between her and Mr. Stroll.

Reading from Mikasi's perspective was also so amusing. I loved sentences like 'God, hope they don't have kids' and 'Nobody should have to learn that their daddy's a monster' were brilliant to me.

I also really liked 'Just my luck, I'm about to ruin a marriage and can't even ruin my lungs in the meantime'. This really helps depict Mikasi's inner monologue and what her personality is like pretty well.

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛᴡᴏ

The introduction of the character Genbu was interesting. It's also very cool seeing his powers come into play, just like how Mikasi's powers came into play with her confrontation with Mr. Stroll in the previous chapter. I'm intrigued by everyone's supernatural abilities so far.

There also clearly seems to be some attention to detail and care here behind the lore of this world and the rest of these supernatural aspects of the story so far. I like the mention of the Arcane Arts, for example.

I also found Genbu basically scolding Mikasi to be a hilarious scene. And Mikasi's interactions with the woman at the bar was amusing to see too.

And the reveal of the city's name, New Tale, was also pretty good too! I liked the way that this chapter concluded. The second to last paragraph was so good too, with how it introduced New Tale's more crude ambiance.

Nice work.

ɢʀᴀᴍᴍᴀʀ ᴀɴᴅ ꜱʏɴᴛᴀx

There are several things I'd like to touch up upon. All optional tips to consider. I understand that you're new to writing, from what you've said in your Before We Begin chapter, so I am exercising a lot of leniency here while I point out these things. Honestly, writing just comes with practice too. It's okay to make mistakes and we're all just here to write for fun by the end of the day.

1. Immediately, as beautiful as the opening paragraph was in the first chapter, I also noticed a change in tenses. A shift between past tense vs present tense.

The first paragraph starts off nicely with past tense, but then the second one is immediately set in present tense. Then it shifts back to past tense again for most of the story.

Typically, it's recommended to keep to one tense (pick past or present) and then stick with it as much as you can. It is too jarring to switch from one to the other often. Unless you're writing a flashback in present tense, for example, there are very few exceptions to that rule.

2. There should never be periods after dialogue tags.

Here is an incorrect example:

I respond "Mikasi".

Here is the corrected example of what that sentence should be formatted as:

I respond, "Mikasi."

The periods are always tucked in before the quotation marks if used and there is always a comma before or after the dialogue tag.

3. Deja vu is always lowercase. Example: It felt like a case of deja vu.

4. I would highly recommend pairing up actions and gestures with emotions and words.

For example, if Mrs. Stroll is upset that her husband has been cheating on her with not one, but multiple mistresses, then show how she feels. Do not just tell.

Show what her face looks like when she is gasping loudly and starting to cry, perhaps? What of her tears? Are her eyes misty with tears trickling down her cheeks? What about her face? What does her voice sound like, what is her tone reflecting? What is she doing with her hands?

Utilize a few out of the five senses to further expand on your descriptions. (Touch, sight, smell, taste, hearing.)

5. For everything else, I would heavily recommend another story on here called 101 Writer Tips from a Tired Reviewer. It's written by a user named ray_of_sunshine9, you should really check it out because I also tend to look back on it whenever I'm writing too.

ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ

I don't know too much about everyone else right now to have a truly concrete idea of what they're like–after all we are only two chapters in–but what I can say is that I like how everyone is depicted so far, especially our lone wolf protagonist Mikasi. I have no problems with any of the characters that have been introduced so far.

I also love Mikasi's more r personality too. It makes her inner dialogue so enjoyable.

ꜰɪɴᴀʟ ɢʀᴀᴅᴇ

On a scale of personal enjoyment from 1-10, with one being the worst and ten being the best, I hereby rate this story a...

4/10

This story has a lot of potential and it sounds so fun, but I sadly couldn't get as into it as I wanted to due to all of the technical issues I've already mentioned earlier– in the Grammar and Syntax section. BUT I think as long as there is a promising premise to a story, there is room to grow and shine once you learn and practice your writing style and prose. I also especially like Mikasi as a protagonist and I found her exciting to read about. Diving into her inner monologue was awesome.

The art of her is also amazing as well!

❝ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴏᴋɪᴇ ᴅᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ'ꜱ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ɪꜱ ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀᴄᴏᴏᴋᴇᴅ ʀɪɢʜᴛ ɴᴏᴡ, ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ʀᴀᴡ. ʙᴜᴛ ɢɪᴠᴇ ɪᴛ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ɪᴛ'ʟʟ ʙᴇ Qᴜɪᴛᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴡᴇᴇᴛ ᴛʀᴇᴀᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇʜᴏʟᴅ.❞