Nigeria, Abuja.

Immediately after Fajr prayers, Khaleel found it very hard to go back to sleep. He has been anxiously awaiting to talk to Batool and just work it out that sleeping is the last thing on his mind so he took a bath, dressed up and decided to check on his office back in Sudan. He knows JamJam will never lack on her job, although they are still not on talking terms she will never let his hard work go in vain. She knows how much the NGO in Sudan means to him and she will do everything in her power to make sure it's up to his standards. Especially since he is not around.

Around nine o'clock in the morning, Khaleel already had two cups of coffee and checked up on Raina, Batool stirred in bed. Their eyes locked and he felt his heart fall in the pit of his stomach. This is it. It's either they go back on Habibiey and Habibty term or they will forever be Khaleel and Batool. Ya Rabeel Aalameen.. just the thought of that makes his heart ache severely.

"Good morning" Khaleel said closing his laptop and moving to sit near her on the bed. Batool yawned pulling the covers from her body.

"Morning" then she moved to stand up in his black T-shirt and sleeping shorts. Khaleel swallowed the lump in his throat.

"It's tomorrow!"

"Ya Allah! Give me a break. I just woke up.." she sighed standing up and closing her eyes for two seconds. "can I at least brush my teeth and check on our daughter?"

Khaleel sighed rubbing his hand on his face. He nod his head. What has gotten into him? She just woke up for goodness sake! With this attitude, there is no way Batool will forget him. He has got to get his act together.

Ten minutes later, Batool walked back into the room looking more alive than sleepy. She closed the door behind her and walked inside with her mug of coffee. Khaleel didn't push her on it. Rather, he let her drink her coffee in peace while scrolling through her phone.

"This is torture Batool.." he groan glaring at her phone which she held in her hand.

"I'm just checking up on Raina. Siddiqa took her to the park and I wanted to make sure she's fine" she replied dropping her phone and mug on the bedside table.

"I really hope you choose your words carefully Khaleel. I am over this fight. I hate when we have a fallout but sometimes it's the only way I can get you to know you did something wrong and very unacceptable"

His heart is beating wildly against his ribcage. He could feel his breathing coming out in haggard pants. Hurting Batool, seeing her this much hurt is like falling in a blazing dungeon. It hurts him, so bad. When he recalls just how much Batool has fought to be with him and how much she sacrificed for him and how much she loves him, Ya Azeez, how dare he hurt this woman? His woman. The woman who has been with him since day one. The one who never gave up on him when he fell into depression.. or when he did all those bad sinful games.

"I will never purposely hurt you Batool. You know that right?"

Nodding her head, Batool held her hand in his blinking back the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes. "It's hurts so bad. I don't want to share you with someone" she had failed. The tears rolled down her face fast and hot.

"Habibty.."

"Just listen to me please" she cut him off taking a deep breath. "This is my destiny and as much as I hate this there is nothing I can do about it. I have accepted this as my faith and test from Allah but I told you previously, it's okay for me to act like this and cry cause wallahi I am hurting"

He knows it's of no use trying to act strong when he is with Batool because this woman is his wife. His better half and if he doesn't show his real self when he is with his wife then where will he show his real self? With that, he let his own tears spill carelessly.

"I need you to please keep to your promise, always. Also set your priorities straight. I am sorry for acting like this but I'll rather act like this and learn from my mistakes than pretend everything is fine when it's not"

"I promise I will. I love you so much Fateemah and I am deeply sorry. I believe this was meant to happen and it's our destiny. My destiny"

"I love you too and I am so thankful for you. I don't care if I share you with thousand other people what matters is i will always be your number one and that I get to have you with me" she hugged him and Khaleel laughed hugging back.

"You will always be my number one habibty"

"I know but Ya Allah your such a headache sometimes. I barely slept well, you kept tossing and turning in bed" she pulled away yawning using her hand to wipe away his almost dried tears.

"I told you I can't sleep knowing your angry at me.."

"The only reason why I was angry at you is because you promised you will come early for Raina's doctor appointment but you showed up late. Do you know for a reason I thought.. what if he doesn't love me anymore?"

Khaleel gasped staring at her shocked, "What? Why will you.."

"That was the only thing I thought about when you told me about Aamirah. I kept thinking about where I failed to shower you with love of if I am giving you the right amount of love you need or you just simply lost interest.. or-"

Batool did not see the forceful, hard, sweet kiss coming her way. She felt the emotions coming off him. The love pouring out to her so hard and full. Sometimes, you will think Khaleel has given out all his love to his work, for people, for his NGO but the truth is, his love for Batool will always be there. Always and forever.

"You deserve all the love in this world Batoolie na and I am sorry you felt like that. The truth is, sometimes I think I don't deserve you. Your too much for me and I'm always thinking.. I'm I doing enough for her?"

Laughing. Batool smiled rolling her eyes. "Tit for Tat. We are even cause I always think the same"

"Go on a date with me"

Batool laughed laying on the bed, when they both snuggled in, she said, "Your trying really hard Mr Khaleel. I like it"

"I just want to make things right Batool. I'm tired of going back and forth with you.."

"I know Habibiey. Don't you think it's unfortunate though?"

Khaleel raised his eyebrow confused, "what is?"

"That some men treat their wives badly when they get married again. They discard all the love, the struggles, the beautiful memories and everything in between when they get married again. It's like it never happened but they just don't care.."

He inhaled deeply, "It really is. I will never do that to you Batool. You know that right?"

"I am letting my guard down for this. Don't let me be one of those women who hate their husband and life"

"Wallahi'l Azeem your the best thing that's ever happened to me. Your my strength Fateemah and the last thing on my mind is to hurt you. May Allah keep your safe and bless you for me.."

Batool swallowed the lump in her throat. She whispered a small ameen under her breath before wrapping her hands around him and closing her eyes. She knows it won't be easy and she will never get the fact that she has to share Khaleel with another woman but she will try. She won't just throw away all they had because of another woman. That will be absurd.

She is going to live in her home for herself and her daughter.

It's either she stays or leaves and leaving is not in her vocabulary.

***

In the afternoon when they both woke up from their well deserved nap, Khaleel freshened up, ate and decided to visit Ya Zeezee. He promised Batool he will be back by Maghreeb for their date which is dinner at a fancy restaurant he arranged.

When he arrived at the main house after greeting his father. He met Ya Zeezee in her room sitting on the flush pink Italian carpet with Sadiya, her three year old placed on her chest. He greeted her sitting beside her on the floor. "Why are holding her like a baby? This big girl!" He teased when Sadiya turned to look at him shyly.

"She is my baby. Leave her alone please!"

Khaleel laughed. "Guess what Sadiya? Your not the last born anymore. Your mother will give birth soon and then we will throw you away. She won't love you anymore!"

Ya Zeezee gasped when Sadiya broke into tears. "Subhanalilah! Khaleeluuu shut up! Yi hakuri baby, he is just playing. I will never throw you away. Stop crying.."

While Khaleel laughed at the scene, Salmah and Safeeya ran inside the room. They jumped on their Uncle fondly while conversing about school.
After Sadiya slept off eventually, the rest of the girls were sent off to Islamiyya by their mother. She came back inside the room bearing two plates of leftover coconut cake, Khaleel beamed collecting the cake.

"I can't believe Ya Maamah bakes a cake for you and not me"

Ya Zeezee rolled her eyes, "I'm the pregnant lady here. You should be thankful I'm sharing my cake with you"

"Your just saying that to make me feel guilty.."

"You should. Your eating a pregnant woman's cake. My most prized possession at the moment. Instead of you to decline politely and let me eat everything"

Khaleel shook his head with laugher, "I must be pretty dumb to pass the offer of eating Ya Maamah's cake" when they fell into comfortable silence. Khaleel looked up at his sister fondly,

"Ya Zeezee I'm sorry for not sticking around much. How are you feeling?"

"Your life doesn't revolve around me Khaleel. You have a family to take care of so I perfectly understand.." she paused "fine alhamdulilah"

"Baba is worried about you"

"He shouldn't be. I am fine!"

Khaleel knows his sister is far from fine. It's written all over her face. "Ya Zeezee you can talk to me"

"About what Khaleel? The thing is I can never escape what is meant for me. Qadaran Allah ne. If this is the end of my marriage with Baban Salmah then so be it. May Allah bless my children for me and grant them perfect childhood filled with peace and happiness"

"Ameen ya Rabbi" before he could say more she changed the topic immediately and Khaleel knows that's the end of their discussion. With a heavy heart, he let it slide.

***

Aamirah doesn't know if it's the fact that Faridah left earlier for a sleepover at a friend's house or the fact that Khaleel is coming home today but she feels extremely restless. She had prayed Maghreeb and lingered on the praying mat reading the Qur'an. When her phone buzzed beside her, she quickly picked up feeling the increase rate of her heartbeat. She didn't say anything, rather she held the phone to her ear listening to his soft breaths.

"Someone is playing hard to get.." Khaleel finally sending while she relived a deep breath. She leaned on the bed feeling the overwhelming feeling wash over her

"Are you up for an outing?"

She bit her lip thoughtfully. "Just come home"

Khaleel chuckled deeply, "Habaaa Aamirah.." it was as if he knows how much him saying Aamirah messes her up because when he said that she almost fainted. Ya Rabbi! What is wrong with her? It's not like he touched her or anything.. he just called her name, except in his deep, soothing, toe curling voice.

Khaleel will not be the death of her!

She caved in to his request "Okay"

"Thank you. I'll be there in twenty minutes or so inshallah"

When he hung up, she stood up to get dressed. She has no idea where they are going and honestly she could care less. It doesn't matter really. As long as Khaleel is with her then she'll be fine.
She got dressed in a royal blue evening gown with a white beaded veil before waiting for him the in living room. The house is eerily quiet without Faridah. It felt so weird.

Before she could let her raw, blazing emotions and hallucinations get to her, the door bell rang and she immediately pushed the door open. Khaleel wrapped her in a hug and she breath heavily chocking on her sob.

"Your fine, I've got you"

She cried shutting her eyes as if that will stop the memories. The awful, terrible memories. When he pushed the door behind him, he led her to the couch while constantly assuring her it was fine. Aamirah shivered when she felt his lips on her neck, she inhaled.

"I don't want to be alone. Please Khaleel, don't leave me alone.."

He wiped away her tears feeling overly guilty. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let Faridah go earlier. It's okay. Ya Rabeel Aalameen, come here," he pulled her in a hug feeling the fear sinking in his stomach.

What if he haven't gotten her sooner?

Innalilahi wa'ina ilayhi raji'un.. did she?

Khaleel pulled away to face her. "Aamirah... Did you.." he paused "did you have any episode?"

Aamirah swallowed the lump in her throat, "No! I would have called you"

He nod his head whispering a small alhamdulilah under his breath. They sat there cuddled up for some minutes before Khaleel remembered the restaurant reservation. He pulled out his phone to bail out on the dinner.

"Are we still going out?" Aamirah asked when scrolled through his call log.

"We can postpone it"

"No, let's go"

He froze, "It's okay really. We can stay in"

"I want to step out for a bit, please"

Nodding his head he placed a kiss on her cheek before helping her up. He stayed by the door while she excused herself to wash her swollen face. When they got in the car, Aamirah clinged onto him holding his hand. Not that he was complaining of anything. He loves that she is getting comfortable with him. one step at a time. One day they will get there Inshallah.

She barely said a word since they left the house. She only watched out the window fascinated with his right hand on her lap. Their fingers tangled up perfectly. This.. is what peace feels like. Them going out for dinner, in a rooftop restaurant with Aamirah sitting opposite him looking like an angel in her blue dress while carefully eating her food. The wind played with her veil leaving strands of black, soft hair in sight.

Khaleel had to excuse himself few minutes into their dish because it was getting so hard for him to not confess his feelings. This is what torture feels like. Torture is when you love your wife deeply and madly but you can't tell her because your afraid she will shunt you out. Torture is having dinner with a beautiful, pretty girl with a radiant, enchanting, heart juggling beauty.

Ya Rabeel Samawaati Waal'ard..

How long is he going to wait?

When they rounded up and went back home, Aamirah would not even let him out of her sight for a minute. She even let him sleep with her on the bed while his hands wrapped around her waist feeling her heartbeat on his chest. It felt like a dream.

Khaleel thought she had fallen asleep, not until she turned around and faced the other side of the bed. She tossed for a while until he reached over to turn the lights.

"What is it?" She didn't respond. "Mimi talk to me!"

Aamirah inhaled deeply. She had tried so hard to hold back the tears and the bubbling, uncertain feeling in the pit of her stomach but she failed. She hates being this free and weak in front of Khaleel but something about letting it out in his presence gives her peace. A little bit of contentment. When he wrapped his hand around her waist she pulled away, he retrieved his hand utterly confused.

What had gone wrong?

One minute they are cuddling, slowly driting into sleep and the other she is distancing herself away from him, crying hysterically.

By Allah he has no idea what to do..

"I don't want to sound ungrateful but you don't know anything about me. Not a single thing yet you took me in and married me. The guilt is there wallahi'l Azeem.. I've messed up your life"

Khaleel had let out a deep breath of relief. Then he leaned on the headboard of the bed and placed his right leg on his left. His ankles clinged and there they stayed.

"I'm not all you see. There is more and it's just not right.. Ya Rabeel Aalameen" she swallowed deeply feeling the blazing heat in her heart. She broke into more tears. Tears that broke his heart everytime they washed down her face.

Flicking his thumb on his eyebrow, he said the truth, "I know you Aamirah"

She didn't bother stopping her tears rather she tucked her chin on her knees and watched him heartbroken.

"Back in Sudan, I have a file in my office, in that file it contains everything about you Mimi"

She gasped softly.

So.. he knows.. like everything?!

Grant me sustenance Ya Rabbi. She prayed.

"I glanced through the first page. I know little Aamirah.. just your name and where you come from. I couldn't read on, it felt wrong.."

The tears cascaded her eyes. Suddenly she felt her lungs tighten, the room feels hot. So hot despite the air conditioner being on its highest mode.

"I could have checked Mimi. I could have read everything and I'll still be okay. I'll be here. With you. But I did not. Do you know why?"

This time, he untangled his legs and faced her. His soft, cold thumb wiped the lingering, stray tear on her nose.

"Because I want to know all your Pieces Aamirah"

"I want to know the real you. Not something straight out of a file.. this," he pointed at them in circular motion "what is between us is real. I swear to Allah it's real.."

She bit on her lower lip letting the tears flow. Freely.

"Can you share your story with me? Please?"

As if he must ask.. she let her lips speak for her as his hand snake around her. Pulling her head gently, lower and lower until he had gotten the satisfaction floating inside of him. He drowned without any hesitation. He drowned in the blue, bright, cool love of Aamirah.

This is what he has been waiting..

Ever since he met her.

Ever since she walked inside his office looking shaken up and frightened..

At long last, he found it.. Khaleel was all shades of happy when they went to sleep for the second time that night.

Ya Allah.. he just unlocked a piece of Aamirah.

One piece at a time.

***
Assalamualaikum!!!!!!!!!
Since Mr Corona is in Nigeria, and we are literally in lockdown mode (no exams and all) we are back at it💃 💃 💃

May Allah keep us safe. Please take precautions. Covid-19 is real and it's here in Nigeria. Let's all stay inside and practice social distancing. Avoid crowded areas!!

I know some people are making fun of it with all the memes and tweets but this is real wallahi. May Allah bring an end to this.. ameen ameen.

Love you guys and pleaseee be careful ❤️❤️ vote, comment and share.

PS: I'm already tired of staying at home. What should I do? Suggest movies to watch and books to read. It doesn't have to be on Wattpad.. anywhere abeg. Help a sister in need. I am bored 😩😩

I FINALLY read a thousand splendid suns by Khaled Hosseini and it's safe to say, I'm obsessed 🥺

Okay.. I've said too much...goodbye💓