Not Edited!!!!!

Nigeria, Kaduna state.

Khaleel was overly tired from the day's trip.

He drove for two hours only to find himself drowning in a pile of work.

Lots and lots of work.

They had been repairs and renovations of the original Raina Non governmental organization to say the least. Khaleel was all and about making sure every single child and person is taken care of just like his mother would have done.

He met a lot.

Different type of innocent children, women and even men. Some were sent to the city by their parents to work for money and they ended up falling in the wrong hands.

Khaleel almost cried listening to a young girl's story. Sumayya. She was sent away to work in the city at the mere age of twelve. She has been hawking groundnut for sometime but business did not work so she turned to house maid business. It was then she was emotionally and physically tortured. Sumayya claimed to be molested by the house boy who she sleeps with in the boys quarters. Her boss is no more like a monster, she beats her for every small mistake she makes and punishes her by starving her. It was a living hell.

Khaleel had gently assured Sumayya that she will be fine.

It has been a lot of unrealistic stories which are somehow the reality we live in. He can't help but imagine if JamJam is to hear all this.. Ya Rabbi.. she will weep for days.

When he got to the hotel room, he quickly took a shower and collapsed on the bed.

It was around twelve already and he knows without a doubt that Batool has fallen asleep seeing she has a morning duty tomorrow.

He had just finished praying some voluntary prayers when his phone rang. Khaleel was beyond surprise to see Aamirah's call thinking she might have already gone to bed but he picked up immediately.

His heart stilled when he heard her small whimpers.

"Aamirah.." he called worriedly letting out a shaky breath.

"Mimi. What's wrong?"

Silence followed by heavy heart wrenching sobs.

"Your scaring me, please what is wrong?"

"Khaleel I'm sorry. I broke my promise.. im so sorry Khaleel.. please forgive me, please" she hiccuped.

"Aamirah what happened? Are you okay? What promise?"

She inhaled sharply, "I had an episode"

His heart palpitated. "Ya Rabeel Aalameen.. did you?"

"I'm so sorry. Please don't be mad. Please forgive me. I wasn't in control of my emotions.."

"Where are you?"

"In my room"

"And?"

"I found a first aid box and.. and I cleaned myself. I'm sorry"

He took a deep breath closing his eyes hurtfully. "I'm not mad Aamirah, I'm actually proud of you. Your healing. You cleaned yourself up and stopped before it got out of hand"

"I had a nightmare. They are all dead. Ya Ashraf, Baba, Mama and Amina. They all died and I was left all alone. I was so scared Khaleel.. I was scared and then he pushed the door and came inside. He slapped me.. and he told me to obey him.. he removed my clothes.. he touched me. I begged him. I tried to push him away but he is stronger than me.. he, Khaleel, he.."

Khaleel can feel the tears washing down his face. He can feel her hurt, so hard. He can't imagine someone touching Aamirah, his own wife. He can't imagine someone will stoop so low and touch someone like that against their will. He cannot believe this is the world we live in.

"Stop" he gently caught her off. "You are safe Mimi. He is not here. It's all a dream"

She inhaled loudly. "How do I stop this? My brain is going through thousand things at once. It's going so fast"

"I want you to take a deep breath and relax" he heard her gulp in air before releasing slowly.

"Now look around you, do you see anyone?"

She was quiet for some time. "Aamirah do you see anyone?"

"No" she whispered.

"You are safe Mimi. Perfectly safe. No one is getting inside the house without my knowledge"

"Khaleel?"

"Na'am Aamirah?" She chuckled softly at his sweet toe curling voice. She knows there is no way Khaleel will let this go. Impossible.

"I wish I can be like you. Free from the demons and just.. happy, carefree, sweet"

It feels like someone ripped open his old soggy wound.

Aamirah just opened his past.

His ugly past.

"Ya Azeez. Mimi! I'm far from perfect. I am not perfect. Like I said, I hide it well. I have my own demons"

"Are you saying this to make me feel better?"

He laughed lowly laying on the bed. "Trust me, I'm not"

She was quiet again. They both are before Khaleel said something..

"When Mama died, I lost it. Literally. Ya Maamah was so scared.. everyone was. No one thought I'll make it" he said quietly recalling everything.

"Hassan was my best friend"

"Khaleel.. you don't have to"

"Let me tell you this wifey"

She chuckled pulling the blanket over her body and letting a smile carve on her lips. Her body shivered slightly at his words.. at his voice.

"Hassan, Hussain and I grew up together. They were like the brothers I never had, always had my back. We were so close that our parents eventually became friends. I knew Batool all my life, she is my mom's friend's daughter so all of us were super close growing up.. until Mama died"

He inhaled sharply clearing his voice.

"When Mama died, I was so heartbroken. I couldn't believe it. One minute she is there and the next she is gone.. buried in the ground six feet down"

"Khaleel, she is in a better place"

He smiled holding back his tears. "Inshallah. You would have loved her"

"I love her no matter what"

"Although Hussain is also my friend, I was closer to Hassan. When Mama died, he helped me to cope with her death. Unfortunately, his way of coping and mine is very different. He told me that he met some guys and they will help me numb away the pain.. i was young and hurt so I agreed. I mean Hassan is my best friend so obviously he will never hurt me but those guys are not my friends. They introduced me to some stuffs, I became addicted"

Aamirah could not believe her ears but nevertheless she did not interrupt him. Rather, she heard eagerly.

"Ya Maamah noticed first. I mean she was always watching over me like a hawk so obviously she will notice. I can remember the day she found the drugs in my room.. she cried so hard saying she failed as an elder sister. She reported me to Baba and they all tried to solve it, to get me to stop but it wasn't easy.." he stopped trying to catch his breath and emotions that are running haywire.

"That's not you" she caught off gently.

"No, it's not but this is me telling you how the demons chased me and held me back"

"How did you.. stop?" She asked hesitantly.

"I got my sisters and Baba to believe I stopped but I never stopped really. Hassan coaxed me into joining this bad group and well.. we went to university. It's all so messed up but then I wasn't thinking straight. Every night I closed my eyes all I see is Mama wrapped around in a white cloth and dropped in the ground.."

A sob broke through her mouth harshly. "Is Hassan still on drugs?"

"He never really stopped. I tried to help him, wallahi i tried but.."

"That's why you warned me. I'm sorry Khaleel.. I should have listened to you"

"It's okay. Your safe that's all that matters"

She wiped away her tears feeling the guilt set on her chest. "How did you stop?"

"Batool" he replied shortly. "Batool came along and she helped me. She saved me"

Aamirah has always know Batool is a heroine but just hearing Khaleel confirm it makes it more accurate.

Batool is a heroine.

"Batool and I compliment each other. We always have. The thing is we all have been through a lot. This is part of living Aamirah. Life is all about hardships and moving on. Making mistakes and learning from them. We all have been through stuffs one way or another it's just that some are harder and you can't compare.. this is life. It's living but remember Allah promised us that with every hardship comes ease. Ease is coming for you Mimi. It's coming, I promise you that"

She cried nodding her head. "Thank you"

"Wallahi'l Azeem I'm not on drugs anymore. I haven't been for a long time. I stopped and I will never go back to it.."

"I know Khaleel"

"You can ask Batool if you want"

She sighed rolling her eyes. Firmly, she said, "Khaleel wallahi I believe you. I trust you and I know your not lying"

"Thank you"

"Thank you"

They both chuckled lightly before a yawn escaped his lips. "You should sleep"

"No, it's fine" he held back another yawn.

"I miss you"

It feels like his heart stopped. He froze. Right there when she uttered the three letter words. Just three words. Three beautiful words.

"I can't wait to see you"

Ya Azeez.

His dear heart..

His poor, dear heart..

"It's scary what you do to me Khaleel but I love it. Every bits of it.."

"Aamirah.. Ya Rabbi. I miss you too"

"You found me. I was lost, but you found me"

He didn't know what is more romantic than what Aamirah has just said.

Fireworks.

Fireworks lightening inside of me.

Sparkles.

Love.

Hope.

He felt it so strong, so pure, so forthcoming.

"I'm glad I found you"

"Me too"

It was on the tip of tongue. Right there. Right on his tongue. The moment he opened his mouth, it will roll off from him but he is holding back.

Because now, it doesn't feel right.

Not when he is so far away from her.

Far away to catch her reaction or hold her in his embrace.

"Goodnight Khaleel"

"Goodnight Aamirah"

He quickly ended the call before his emotions get the best of him.

It isn't the right time.

When he finally utters the three letter words, he wants the moment to be right.

The moment he will say, I love you Mimi.

***
Part nine; Broken Pieces

Dear Ya Ashraf,

Before you start lecturing me on how Islam frowns upon suicide or demand some explanations on how I killed the baby in my womb.. let me tell you this,

Life is beautiful.

I was just so focused on the wrong and ugly sides of it for a very long time.

But life, is truly beautiful.

I begged for forgiveness. I prayed all night. I fasted for sixty days. I did everything when I realized how wrong I was.

Allah has forgiven me. Hopefully.

I starved myself and deprived the baby of his rights which somehow led me to miscarriage. To me killing my child.

It hurts so bad Everytime I think about it but the worst part is that it did not happen once or twice.. it happened thrice.

Three times.

I was pregnant with my rapist child thrice.

And he killed two.

Not necessarily with his hands but his actions.

Sometimes, I think it was for the best. They don't deserve to witness this world this way. They don't deserve this.

It will always hurt and haunt me but I am beyond happy they don't get to see the world this way.

Through this awful eyes.

They deserve to see the world the right way.

To see life is his atmost perfection and beauty.

Even though he broke me,

And along the way my pieces got lost,

One thing is for sure.. I will heal from this Inshallah.

I am restoring hope Ya Ashraf and I sincerely hope this works out well.

Don't feel bad please.

This is not on you,

THIS IS ALL ON ME!

Love,
Mimi.

***
Part Ten; Most perfect luck.

Ya Ashraf,

It's official I have the most perfect luck.

No, I am not crazy. After telling you all what happened you must think I have to worst luck in the history of lucks but your wrong.

I have the most perfect luck ever.

Most perfect!

The day Hajiya Hiba managed to break me out from the house is insane.. I can clearly remember the day.

I can remember his sinister smile as he dumped me on the ground after he finished with me.

I remember thinking about how no one deserves this type of life but also coming to a conclusion that this is my destiny and this is my life.

I remember crying and shaking wearing a torn out gown he gave me three Eid's ago.

I remember Hajiya Hiba walking inside the room with a niqaab covering her face and her sweet caring hands embracing me in a hug.

I remember her plan to get me out and how she took me to her house.. where I met Sakinah and we hugged and laughed and ate.

I remember changing into a brand new black Abaya Hajiya Hiba gave me and her hugging me so tight while showering dua's on me.

I remember how scared I was thinking he will find me but Sakinah hugged me and said, "May Allah be with you bestie"

I remember Abdallah, her son taking me to the motor park so I will board a car and go far away from him.

I remember the card, the NGO card I am staring at right now. I will always remember this card because right behind it there is Hajiya Hiba's number.

*Raina NGO (Non Governmental Organization).
Public figure.
We help the ones who are willing to be helped.*

Do you know why I have the most perfect luck?

Because that is the same day I met him.

That is the day our paths crossed and my life has never been the same,

In a very, very, very good way.

That is the day I met him,

Khaleel.

***
Eid Mubarak sweeties!!! 🥳❤️

Taqabnal Allahu minna wa minkum✨

I honestly cannot believe Ramadan is over alreadyyy🤧 May Allah spare our lives to witness many more Ramadan.

You guys should have more faith in Aamirah cause she is sincerely healing. Okay? We all had demons. Even our perfect Khaleel has demons..🥺 and there is more🙊

Thank you for reading. Vote, comment and share❤️❤️