Jordan was out running errands in Patrick's car when we got back. Patrick said she was headed to the grocery store when she got done with the other errands.

That meant Tyler and I could finally have a moment alone and not worry about adult supervision. I was itching to just be alone in his arms for as long as we could get away with it. I wouldn't have even thought of it if we were back in Toronto. It was easy to find a place to have privacy there. I needed to get my cousins and Patrick to leave us alone too. They had been suffocating me with kindness and love all day. I appreciated it but I needed some air already. 

I decided to play the tired card. I yawned several times and stretched. That didn't seem to work so I started acting like I was falling asleep there on the couch and then 'startled' myself awake.

"Do you need to go lay down, Lex?" James asked.

Finally.

I nodded, "I think I need a nap." I looked at Tyler, "Can you come lay down with me? I don't want to be alone."

Please do not offer to come Laura.

Tyler looked at Laura, "Come get me up if you hear Jordan park. I don't want her thinking something is up."

Patrick, who knew me better than anyone here when it came to matters like this, rolled his eyes. He knew I wasn't just wanting to 'nap' with Tyler. I eyed him pointedly in my best sibling stare that said, 'Just fucking go along with it'.

 "My mom has her location shared with me. I'll keep an eye on it and send Laura up there when she's on her way home."

"Thanks man." Tyler fist bumped Patrick and we headed upstairs.

I casually took off my shoes and sweater. It left me only in my black dress. Tyler kicked his shoes off and crawled into bed so that his back was to the wall and opened the covers for me to come and crawl into bed. We both curled up in my bed. I nestled into Tyler's chest. It took me several minutes before I got the guts to make my next move.

I tried to act casual. Tyler had his eyes closed. He seemed to be settling in for his own nap. I leaned up and started kissing him slowly. Tyler startled for a moment, processing what was happening but started kissing me back when he realized what I was doing. I slowly slipped my tongue into his mouth like he had done to me last week. I wanted to see if he would match my energy.

He did.

Continuing our slow dance we had going, he gently rotated me onto my back. Tyler positioned himself so that he was partially on top of me but wouldn't crush me. My leg wrapped around his back. Tyler's hand wrapped under my head to the back of my neck. He pulled me against him. I felt myself start to slowly grind my hips into his.

I was in a dress, so taking me would be easy if he wanted to. He could easily pull my underwear over or down. I wanted him to want to. I wanted to give myself over to him and not have to think about what came next or what was going to happen over the next few days. These fleeting moments with Tyler were all that were keeping me going right now. Otherwise, I was running on fumes that were disappearing rapidly.

I started to pick up the pace, kissing Tyler more aggressively and in what I hoped was a seductive manner. It wasn't like I had a ton of experience in this department. I started to pick up my pace with the grinding. I hoped that I was doing it right. It felt like a natural rhythm but I wasn't used to doing it. The friction was giving me hormonal feelings I hadn't experienced with another person before. A very carnal ache was starting to build in my stomach. I needed a release and I wanted Tyler to be the one to give it to me.

I felt Tyler smile under my kiss and pull away his mouth. He whispered in my ear, "If you keep this up, Laura will walk in on a scene she's not expecting."

"Let her." I smiled mischievously. 

Tyler chuckled, "We still haven't had that talk, Lex."

I huffed a little louder than I had meant to. "So let's have it." I knew I sounded whiny but I didn't want to stop for a birds and the bees talk.

He sighed, then looked me square in the eyes, "I want you. In the Biblical sense and every way in between. You are smart and sexy, and everything I could want out of a woman. So please do not take this the wrong way. I don't think the time is right, Baby. You've been through a hell of a lot here lately and today has been rough for you. There will be so many other times for us to make love. I promise you that."

Make love.

He didn't use fuck, or bang, or screw or any normal word for a teenage boy describing sex. It made me want him more. Which did not feel great at the moment since he was turning me down.

I had gotten myself so worked up that the thought of stopping now physically hurt. It made me emotional too. I felt the tears start to well up in my eyes. Tyler brushed one away that managed to fall.

"What's wrong Baby?"

"I just didn't think I would have to convince my boyfriend to be intimate with me. I just want to be with you but now I feel like I'm doing something wrong."

Tyler started kissing me. Aggressively.

He tightened the grip he had on my hair in one hand and I felt his other hand start to work its way in between us. He stopped short of entering my underwear.

I felt my pelvis start to grind against his hand, inviting him in.

Tyler pulled back to say, "Baby, we can do other things besides sex. I can make you feel good without going that far."

I understood what he meant.

"Please." I begged.

Tyler kissed me slowly for a moment and then pulled back and said, "I'm going to make you feel things you've never felt before, Alex."

And he did.

All of those years of playing guitar had made him excellent with his fingers. I had to bite my lip to not make any noise that could alert the others what we were up to.

Tyler held a steady rhythm as he pumped his fingers in and out of my body. He was also circling a very tender spot on my neck with his tongue while keeping the same rhythm with his thumb at the apex of my sex. I bit hard into his shoulder to let out my release.

We were both panting by the time he was finished with me.

I silently mouthed, "Thank you."

"Any time, Baby. Fuck you feel so good. I always knew you would, but fuck, your fucking so tight and wet. So fucking sexy."

I started to grab at his pants, intending to return the favor. He gently stopped me.

"What?" I asked confused.

"I don't need that tonight, Alex, Baby. I just wanted to make sure you knew how much I wanted you. I don't need it back. Plus, Jordan should be home soon."

I nodded and held onto him so that we could just exist together for a few more minutes.

Laura did eventually knock on my door to let us know Jordan was close. Tyler left to let me change out of my dress into some more comfortable clothes. Laura came in to do the same.

A small smirk came across her face, "So, uh, how was your nap?"

I smirked back, "Fine."

She rolled her eyes, "Come on, tell me, how is he?"

I blushed, "How's Gavin?" I shot back.

"Amazing."

"Oh Lord." I blushed. I hadn't expected her to answer so cavalierly. 

"Sooo, how is Tyler? I mean he looks like he would be good in bed."

"That's your boyfriend's brother." I sniped back.

"So what? I'm still curious." She shrugged and looked back expectantly. I was not having this conversation.

I rolled my eyes, "I wouldn't know. We didn't go that far."

She didn't buy it for a minute. "You two weren't just canoodling up here."

It wasn't a question. She was stating it as a fact.

I smirked and nodded, "He's really good with his hands is all I will say."

We both giggled and finished changing.

Jordan came into the house and the boys started unloading her car. I was dying to see what she knew about what I had learned today.

"What's up Lexi?" She said as she put up a jug of milk.

"Did you know that Amanda asked her husband if I could move in with them when Dad started this whole Canada business?"

Her eyes looked wide, "Who told you that?"

"My eleven year old half brother of all people. Why hasn't anyone else?"

Jordan bit her lip. "Honey, Amanda did love you in her own way. Elyse and I did ask her about you staying with her for high school. This was before I took your dad to court. At first she seemed open to it but then she backed off. Elyse found out that Raymond didn't want that big a change in their house. She had spent so much time trying to make their relationship work, she didn't want to rock the boat."

"So he fucked me over and she chose him over me? Got it."

"Watch your mouth, young lady."

I rolled my eyes. She hadn't corrected me.

I let it drop. We all finished helping her unload and then started helping her fix lunch. We were just starting to plate when Elyse called in that she was there and bringing in people with her. That piqued my interest.

Bryce and Finn came into view as Elyse said, "Momma Jordan, do we have enough or do we need to order in a pizza for us?"

"Honey, you know I always make plenty."

And she had. We had made enough chicken fried steak with gravy, mashed potatoes, and green beans for an army. I missed Jordan's cooking.

There were eight places at the large table in the dining room once we let out the leaf. Patrick grabbed another chair from the kitchen so that we had enough chairs. Even with nine, this was still a lot smaller than I was used to. When all the Families and their SOs got together we could have almost forty of us.

We started swapping stories and catching up on each other's lives. Bryce was seeing a woman but had felt it best not to bring her to the funeral. With Raymond, that made sense. Finn was running a successful hay baling operation in Alba. That fascinated my Canadian crew. They talked about having to come back to get to tour Dallas and head out east to see where Bryce and Finn lived too.

For the first time today, I felt at peace. I smiled and passed the mashed potatoes.

After lunch, we decided to play some games. It was weird acting like this was just a normal Saturday with the fam.

I wanted to talk to Elyse more about Amanda but felt like it would just make an already hard day harder. I decided to table it for now.

I looked over at Tyler and my skin started to get hot. Flashbacks of what had happened earlier swirled in my head. Ari and I had never gone that far. Other than some dry humping, I had never gone that far with anyone.

I wanted to explore him further. I had never wanted to explore that side of myself with someone before. It made my stomach do flips in a very new sort of way.

I wondered when it might happen again. Until then, daydreams would have to do.