Part two of the fucking saga I have school tomorrow and 1616267282 pieces of homework but I chose to do this. Wow.

———

Bakugou: *smacks Izuku's ass* "whoops."

Izuku: ?????? "What."

Bakugou: "it's just-" *smacks it again* "my hands slip-" *SMACK* "from time to-" *SMACK* "time."

———

Bakugou: "what are you doing?"

Izuku: *smiles* "smelling a rose."

Bakugou: *mutters: I wish I was that rose.*

Izuku: "Huh?"

Bakugou: *SHRIEK* "I SAID YOU'RE FUCKING GROSS-"

———

Izuku: "Love you."
Katsuki: *snorts* "Gay."
Izuku: "Says the one with the raging boner."

————

*Scenario where Izuku and Katsuki somehow have a son*

Katsuki: *Holding the kid in his arms and cradling him*
Izuku: "hi Kacchan." *Pecks his cheek* Hi baby. *Smiles and leans down to kiss the kid's forehead-*
Katsuki: *AGGRESSIVELY RIPS THE KID AWAY FROM IZUKU'S HOLD*
Izuku: ???? "Kacchan-"
Katsuki: "DON'T KISS MY SON WITH YO DICK SUCKING LIPS."

Izuku: ..... "HE IS MY SON TOO-"

————

*locker room*
Katsuki: "I'LL FUCKING BEAT YOUR ASS, FUCKING NERD!"
Deku: *grinning* "I wanna see you try!"
Katsuki: "FINE, BITCH! MEET ME AT GROUND BETA! NINE P.M.! DON'T BE LATE, FUCKWAD!"
Deku: "Okay!"

*Literally everyone in the locker room, groaning*: "Could both of you.. Please.. Please ask each other out normally."

———

Katsuki: *Pointing a gun at Izuku* "DROP YOUR WEAPON!"
Izuku: *Drops into a split*

——-

Uraraka: "Deku.. What did you do."
Izuku: ... *mumbles something quietly*
Uraraka: ... "Izuku. Midoriya. What did you do-?"
Izuku: *bursts out* "KACCHAN CHEATED ON ME SO I FUCKED HIS BEST FRIEND! "

———

Kirishima: "Oh cool! Midoriya's song playlist! Wonder what he listens to?"
Kaminari: *snorts* "Probably some fluffy stuff like the ABC's or something."
Kirishima: *unplugs the earphones on Midoriya's phone*
Speaker: "HUMP ME, FUCK ME, DADDY BETTER MAKE ME CHOKE-"

———

Midoriya:
Midoriya:
Midoriya: "Bitch."

*EVERYONE SCREECHES*

———

Todoroki: "We have lost Bakugou in the crowd."
Momo: "we have to split up to find-!"
Izuku: "I'll take care of it."
Izuku: *clears throat* "Ah.. I'm so useless... I can't ever be All Might's successor and-"

*Distant yelling and explosions*
Bakugou, barreling through a crowd; "YOU FUCKING DEKU! SHUT THE FUCK UP!-"
Izuku: "found him."

———

Izuku, moaning: "Ah..! Daddy!-"
All Might, through the window: "SON!?"

————
(Extra)

Denki, entering Tokoyami's room: "Yo Tokoyami-"
Dark Shadow: "HSKAJSHDKSKSSKSLSKHSKSSKHGRHHEHREHJSKSKSJ-"
Denki: *SCREAMS* "GETCHO FUCKIN' BIRD BITCH!"
Tokoyami: "It don't bite."
Denki: "YES IT DO!"

———