CHAPTER TWENTY ONE

"I give terrible advice, everyone knows that!" 

***

You know what I was not? 

 Mad. 

 Nope, not at all, I have never felt less mad in my entire life. Nope, I, Nathaniel Masteron, am one hundred percent not mad. 

 See? Even I don't buy it. 

 "Nate, I'm sorry!" Raven picked up her pace until she was jogging next to me, "okay? I'm really, really-" 

 "You don't need to be sorry." I cut her off, wishing that my tent was closer then it was. "Okay? So stop saying that, you didn't do anything wrong." 

 I say that, but my chest still feels like it weighs a million pounds more than it was supposed to. "You took my advice, that was the first time anyone has actually done that." 

 "Why?" 

 "Because I give terrible advice!" I whirled around, my not-so-well concealed anger bubbling up for just a second. "And everyone knows that!"

 Raven jumped slightly, so I took a deep breath, composing myself to the best of my abilities, and making sure my heart rate was slower when I spoke next. "Do you feel any better?" 

 She hung her head so that her knotted hair could conceal her face, her delicate lips were twisted in the smallest of scowls. "No." 

 "Well, I don't have any right to be angry." I tried to assure, although my previous outburst didn't help my case. "Okay? So I'm not." 

 I ducked through my tent, and clenched and un clenched my hands until I felt better. 

Which wasn't for a while. 

***

I had my knife out, and in my hands when we were out in the woods the next day. Sometime overnight, Clarke, Finn, and a kid named Myles went missing while they were hunting. Was I worried? Well, yeah a little, but I also know that Clarke could handle herself. 

 And Finn and the other guy. 

 "You should be using a gun." Octavia pointed out, and in response, I twirled the large Grounder knife around in my hand. I was getting used to it, and it was more comfortable than a gun. 

 "Maybe." Was my curt response, making Raven think even further I was mad at her. 

 Which I wasn't. 

 "Where are they?" Raven whispered, her harsh tone making me think that she was the mad one. Her gun was aimed at the ground, which made me swipe my eyes over the tree's, as I know that is where the Grounders come from. 

 "We'll find them." Octavia replied, her tone reassuring and confident. 

 I continued walking soundlessly, trying to figure out why I got mad lat night. It was probably because I was disappointed in Bellamy, I mean, he knows that Raven is with Finn, but he slept with her anyway... that is kind of a dick move. 

 "Is anyone else hearing that signal?" Monty's voice crackled over his newly made walkie-talkies. I held the device to my ear, hearing nothing but am buzzing, empty sound. 

 "It sounds like nothing." I responded vaguely, curious as to why Monty felt the need to point out the empty signal. 

 "It was what we heard when we tried to contact the Ark." 

"That's really cool, Monty." I spoke offhandedly, not understanding how dead radio signal could help us out. "Like, really cool." 

 "Pay attention, guys." Bellamy's voice cracked over the walkie-talkies, making me roll my eyes without meaning too. "We have to focus on finding the others."

 "We have to focus on finding the others." I mocked in a high-pitched voice, but didn't press the button on my walkie-talkie so anyone other than Octavia and Raven could actually hear me. 

 "I don't know, guys, it's definitely so-" Monty's voice cut out, crackled random words for a few seconds, and then went silent, the blank, dead buzzing replacing him. 

 My heart jumped. "Monty?" 

 No response. 

 "Monty, report!" 

"He just got out of range." Bellamy tried to assure, but my pale face and fluttering heart didn't believe him. "We'll have to wait until we get back." 

 "He'll be fine." Octavia spoke, her voice much softer than her brothers as she placed a hand lightly over my bicep. "We need to keep looking." 

 I was about to comply, when a loud, static screeching came from the walkie-talkie, making me drop it in shock, my heart jumping to my throat. None of us moved, just staring at the discarded electronic, until I bent down on shaky knees to pick it up, turning to Raven. "What the hell was that?" 

 The gaunt look on her face was enough answer I needed, and I gulped, silently praying that Monty was okay. If he went missing, I wouldn't hesitate to send out a fully-armed search party, and I think that everyone knew that. 

 A soft rustle came from our right, making a chill shoot up my arm. I drilled my gaze into the dark brush, the hair on my arms standing straight up as I motioned a finger to my lips, spinning the knife so the blade pointed out and crouching down. 

 "Nate, don't!" Octavia hissed in a sharp whisper, and I turned and waved my hand, making her raise he gun and walk over so she was just behind me, while Raven whispered our situation into the electronic. 

 I reached my hand out, grabbing the branch and pulling it away, surging forward, and almost tripping over a body on the ground. "Aw shit!" I cursed, jumping and steadying myself on a tree trunk as Octavia bent down. It was a small boy, around the age of fifteen, and I could tell he was alive by his strangled gasps, and tears streaming down his glowing face. 

 "Myles?" I asked, wishing for once I could be coordinated. The boy himself was sobbing and groaning in pain, clutching his chest, blood staining his shirt. I bent down so I could look at his wound more easily. There was a small hole just below his heart, a discarded arrow behind it. "Did you pull the arrow out?" I asked, slightly impressed, but also annoyed at the idiocy. 

 A small nod, followed by another groan came from Myles. Bellamy burst out from the bushes, and I purposely avoided his gaze, pressing down hard over the cut, making the small boy cry in pain. "I know it hurts, but we gotta stop the bleeding..." I paused, before I realized just how alone we were, "where are Clarke and Finn." 

 "G-Grounders took them." 

 My eyes widened, an icy feeling of dread slipping down my throat, freezing my entire chest. I was glad I was kneeling, because if I was upright, I would have fallen over. My hands loosened on Myles's chest. I took a deep breath, realizing how I had forgotten to breath. 

 "What, which-" I struggled to form a coherent sentence, so I cleared my throat rather aggressively, "which way?" 

 "No way." Bellamy countered, his voice irking me anyway, "we need to get him back to camp." 

 "I need to go help them!" I snapped, my whole, 'not mad' exterior coming back, I was mad... but not at Raven, just at Bellamy. "If you can carry me, I think you can carry some scrawny little kid." 

 "You are a scrawny little kid!" He shot back, making a stab of hurt, followed by more of my not anger. 

 "Well this little kid doesn't like knowing his friends might be dead and not doing anything about it!" I shouted, oblivious to the look Octavia was shooting me. "Sorry if you're too worried about your image to help me." I spat, my heart pounding hard, my fists clenched so tight around the knife that they went white. I gave him one last withering glare, the moonlight reflecting off of his face, making it look ghostly white, and turned to stomp away.

 "You are not going out there alone!" Bellamy growled, reaching forward and grabbing my arm, yanking me back forcefully. I almost lost my balance again, but threw my knife-arm out, stumbling. "The last thing we need is for you to die!" 

 "Oh, sorry, I thought that would be something you would want!" I lost all sense of what I was saying now, words just pouring from my mouth like poison, "you know, because then there wouldn't be anyone to contradict your stupid ideas!" I huffed, ripping my arm from his grip and stalking into the darkness, toward camp, yelling into my walkie-talkie for Monty. 

 He never responded.

 ***

 "Don't you think I want to go after them too?" 

 Jasper and I turned around in almost perfect unison. He had both feet on the ladder, I was planted on the ground, but both of us were glaring. 

 "If it was you out there, do you think Clarke, Monty, or Finn would be hiding behind the walls?" I asked, gently pushing Jasper to climb so I could escape this. I wasn't 'not mad' anymore, but I was pissed off, and worried. Clarke and Monty were missing, and I couldn't do anything about it without Bellamy going all annoyingly protective on me. I liked that attribute a lot more on Monty, who could be dead because Bellamy didn't let me go look for him. I know he wouldn't just give up if it was me out there, so neither am I. 

Bellamy's eyes softened as I pushed Jasper again, and he scrambled up the ladder, "Nate, you know I want to, but the Grounders-" 

 "Forget the damn Grounders." I shot back, making a keen effort to keep my voice down, I had yelled at Bellamy enough, even if he did deserve it. Something about him can just make me so mad. "They haven't came at us for days, you think they'd choose today?" 

 "They could." 

 Before I could think of a witty comeback, a loud groan from the boy in the Drop Ship cut me off, drawing my eyes over. I sighed, walking over to Myles and kneeling down. "Hey bud, how're you doing?" 

 "Thirsty." He moaned, sweat slicking his hair back. I nodded, looking up at Bellamy, who was staring at me with a quizzical look on his face. "Make yourself useful, Blake, I rule you in this category." 

 Bellamy shrugged, turning and walking out of the Drop Ship to get the water. I turned back to Myles, "Bellamy is getting you some water," I explained, standing up and brushing off my pants. "You're gonna be okay, Myles, I'll get some more bandages." 

 I made my way over to the ladder, wracking my memory for where Clarke told me she kept the bandages. As much as I hate it, I am the most medically experienced when she is gone, just from always hanging out around Abby, and wanting to learn more about helping people. I was the most interested in disease, seeing if there was anyway I could help my mom, other than stealing. I later found out that there really wasn't. 

 "Are the bandages over here?" I asked Jasper, dodging around some scrap metal, as I knew I would fall if my foot caught on one. The boy himself was gazing intently at a container labeled, in big block-y letters: GUNPOWDER! THIS CRAP WILL BLOW YOUR DAMN FACE OFF! Accompanied by a wide assortment of exclamation points. I sighed, you really have no choice but to read that in Raven's voice. 

 "Yeah, behind the shell-casings." He nudged his head, his hair flopping with the action, and I nodded, ruffling his messy locks as I passed, grabbing the small medical kit right as I heard a cutter from below. 

 "Huh, that was fast," I muttered thoughtfully, jumping over Jasper's leg as I made my way to the hatch. "I just gotta change Myles's bandages, and then will come up to help you." 

 "Thanks, chief." Jasper nodded his head, his lips clenched tight in concentration. I pulled open the hatch, climbing down the first rung and dropping the rest of the way, turning around, expecting to see Bellamy. 

 "You got some sort of super speed I don-" my snarky comment was cut short when I turned around and saw that it wasn't Bellamy standing by Myles. It was Murphy, a plastic bag clinging to Myles's head, not moving, not groaning, not breathing.

 Murphy killed him. 

 We stared at each other for a few seconds, his still bloody face seeming to drill holes in my head. 

 I guess we both had the same thought, as we lunged for the gun on the table at the same time, clashing in the middle and thrashing around. I swung my medical kit up, managing to smack him in the face with the plastic container, earning a grunt and a sharp stab to the gut with the butt of the gun. I wheezed, doubling over at the sharp pain it brought, giving Murphy a chance to smack the back of my knees, making me tumble to the ground. I wasn't done yet though, old Nate would have given up, but new Nate still has friends to find, so I spun on to my feet, unsheathed the knife, and held the blade in front of me, the sharp tip touching the metal of the gun. 

 "Oh," Murphy's lips curled up in amusement, his eyebrows raising and his gaze locked on the blade, "souvenir from your Grounder buddies? I gotta say I had a blast telling them about you." 

"Well I'm honored." I crowed back, only tightening my grip and refusing to break eye contact. "I am sure I'd have a lot to say about  you as well, dickhead." 

 "Nate?" Jasper called, climbing down the ladder, "I heard crashing are you okay..." his voice faltered when he saw the current position we were in. I don't know why, but I felt like as long as I had the knife, I would have some sort of chance at survival. 

 "You call for help and I'll shoot you." Murphy warned, keeping the gun trained on me, Jasper's eyes widened, "now, put the knife down, Nate, or Jasper dies." 

 I clenched my teeth so tightly to the point that it hurt, trying to throw all of the hate I could at Murphy, in the form of my coldest glare. "Fuck you, Murphy," I muttered, slowly bending my knees and placing the blade on the ground.  The boy himself just smirked. 

"Murphy, put the gun down," Jasper urged in a breathless whisper, his eyes widened to approximately the size of Venus, the smile melted off of Murphy's face, and he pointed the gun back over to Myles's body, "he-he tried to kill me." 

 I grabbed Jasper's hand and slowly took a step back, but Murphy immediately jumped back. "Don't move!" He yelled, his voice rising. I held my hands in the air, Jasper mimicking the action, "hey, it's cool, calm down." 

"No, it's not." Murphy's smirk re-appeared, only infuriating me further, "you know what would happen if you told Bellamy." 

 "Told Bellamy what?" 

 A small breath of relief came from me, as Murphy's eyes went to the radio in Jasper's hands. His hand was in his pocket the entire time, I guess he was pressing down on the speak button. Smart move, Jazzy. 

 Murphy closed his eyes, exasperation clear on his scrunched features. "Give me the radio, Jasper." 

 Jasper slowly pulled the radio from his pocket, and, before either of us could react, raised it to his lips and announced in a flurry of intermingled words, "Murphy has a gun, he killed Myles-" 

 A growl was heard, and then Murphy brought the gun forward, whipping it into Jasper's cheeks, but giving me the opportunity to launch forward and shoulder-check him into the nearest table, sending pieces of scrap metal flying into the air, giving me another tripping hazard to worry about, we were, yet again, in a very intense game of tug-of-war over the arsenal. 

I could see Jasper scrambling toward the discarded radio, but my main focus was on the evil rat in front of me. Murphy sent a sharp shove in my direction, and I guess you could imagine what happened next. 

 I fucking tripped. 

 I yelled out in surprise, my foot rolling over one of the metal scraps, slipping out for under me, and making my entire body jerk to the side in an effort to keep me on my feet. Murphy slammed the gun into my back, making me pinwheel to the side, slamming my shoulder into the ground,  and rolling over just in time to stare down the barrel of a gun. 

 "Murphy, what the hell are you doing?" I heard Bellamy demand, and the boy himself bent down to pick up the radio, pointing his gun at Jasper. 

In response, he jumped over, pulling the lever on the side of the Drop Ship doors, sending them slowly rumbling shut, trapping us inside with Murphy-The-Psychopath. 

"Murphy! Open the damn door!" Bellamy yelled, before all light was cut off from the outside. I sighed deeply. 

 "Try to be the hero, Nate and Jasper die." 

 A/N: Ohh, Nathamy is not in a very good place right now... and why is my poor child always getting injured? Like what did Nate ever do to you Murphy? Like seriously, who likes season 1 Murphy?  

 (The gif had nothing to do with the chapter, I just thought it was too cute to pass up!)

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