His wrists stung and it was nothing he could heal.

Pain comes in a thousand variations but never had he felt anything as bad as this. It was throbbing, but inconsistent, without a rhythm, so it was unexpected. It burned hot one second and then his fingers were icy numb.

Pain was easy to focus on; easy, not enjoyable. At the moment all he could think about was the agony and beg for whatever God or Angel was out there to heal him.

It had been exactly a week since Edom and this is the fate Magnus succumbed to every night when he had depleted himself magic for his pain-relieving spells and there was no work to do. It seemed to be unhealable, but Magnus really hadn't tried.

The apartment had been lonely when Alec was gone. But it was worse now that he was back, but too busy to be there.

Alec had been a toy that belonged to someone else. Now he was back in Magnus' possession, but the same annoying brat was still playing with him. He'd always share Alec with the Nephilim but tonight he was in greater need of the boy, of that he was certain.

Outside, it was raining. Drops of water clung to the large glass windows overlooking the living. The light of the city caught in them and was cast against the walls. Steady raindrops were the perfect soundtrack for inducing drowsiness.

The heaviness of sleep was starting to numb the pain when he heard footsteps in the hallway.

Magnus opened his eyes, the crack of light aimed directly at his eyes. Even as he was blinded, he could make out a familiar silhouette.

"You were sleeping-- Sorry," Alec whispered.

"You're fine," Magnus croaked.

Alec hesitated momentarily before slipping into the room.

The room was pitch black, just the way Magnus liked it.

There was a thud of a heavy bag hitting the floor then the mattress sunk in, almost pulling Magnus to where Alec had sat on the edge.

He wanted to go to Alec but movement hurt. Alec would find him in the dark eventually.

"What are you doing?" Magnus asked.

"At the moment, taking off my shoes," Alec said, softly.

"Are you staying the night?"

Part of Magnus dreaded Alec saying "yes." Showing pain wasn't one of the things Magnus enjoyed. But how could you go to hell with someone and not come back with a little more trust in one another.

"I don't know."

A boot hit the carpeted ground.

"Where are you?" Alec whispered. Magnus wanted to raise his hand, to find Alec in dark and pull him closer.

"I'm exhausted," Magnus admitted. "I can't--"

"It's fine," Alec said. "We just got back to New York an hour ago. I just couldn't stand to be around the Institute."

Cold, calloused fingers fell against Magnus' face.

"Will you stay here tonight? Magnus asked. The little gesture was so comforting already.

"Sure," Alec said. Magnus could hear the shy little smile in his voice. He could hear the blush in his cheeks. He could see the shine in his blue eyes.

A random stab of pain broke through Magnus' reverie, causing him to gasp.

Alec's hand drew away.

"Are you okay?"

"It's just my wrists--"

Alec's hand found his shoulder, running down his arm until he his Magnus' forearm, stopping there.

"I'm turning on the lights," Alec said, decidedly.

"No--"

But Alec was already brightening the lights a little so the room look more orange than anything.

Alec tumbled back onto the bed, gently taking Magnus' wrists in his hands, inspecting the bracelets of burned and bruised flesh.

"How did this happen?" Alec asked.

"Edom. Sebastian had me in handcuffs," Magnus said. "Just minor chafing--"

"Stop making jokes," Alec snapped. "They have to heal on their own, I suppose?"

"Yes," Magnus said.

"Why haven't you healed yourself?"

"Don't treat me like a child--" Magnus lifted his eyes to challenge Alec's. But Alec's concern was too genuine. Why was it so hard to be mad at him? "I'm too exhausted. I don't have the energy."

It was the truth. You didn't fight a war and come back ready for round 2.

"Should I call Cat or Tes--"

"I don't want people over," Magnus said.

"Okay," Alec said, backing away. He walked around the bed, straight into the bathroom, without a word.

Magnus waited, staring at his wrists. Would it leave scars, a permanent remind of everything and everyone they left behind?

Raphael's stupid face flashed in the back of his mind. Blood. The sword. Sacrifice.

"Magnus."

Magnus looked back at Alec, who was holding an array of supplies.

Magnus tucked his legs under himself, giving Alec room to sit in front of him on the bed. He started with Magnus' right hand, gently dabbing the cuts with a warm washcloth.

"Why haven't you gotten better in a week?" Alec asked. "You shouldn't still be exhausted."

"I can't go very long before I have to do something about the pain," Magnus said, wincing when Alec pressed a little too hard. He apologized quietly.

"Tomorrow someone is coming over and healing this," Alec said.

Magnus opened his mouth to speak, but Alec kissed him, canceling the words and the thoughts and the intentions.

The pain was gone for a second, cured by the oxytocin rushing through his veins.

"No," Alec mumbled, his lips still lingering on Magnus'. The word came out like a little puff of hot air.

"Okay," Magnus sighed.

Alec's head dropped again, getting back to work.

"How have you been otherwise?" Alec asked.

He wanted to know if Magnus was having nightmares. If he was seeing things. If he was grieving too much-- too little-- not enough.

"I'm dealing," Magnus said. "What about you?"

"It's done," Alec said, stealing a glance at Magnus. "I'm just glad it's done. I'm glad we're home. I'm glad you're safe. I miss everyone who didn't make it back."

I miss Max, was how that translated.

Alec set the cloth aside, applying a thin coat of Neosporin now.

Magnus stared off into space as Alec worked.

He was so tired. He just wanted to sleep.

His wrists continued to burn, more so now that the medicine was seeping into his bloodstream.

Alec wrapped his wrists with simple white bandages a couple of times.

White. The color of mourning.

Alec had to pull Magnus back into reality when he was done, everything set aside and cleaned up.

"You should sleep," Alec said, sitting back.

He was waiting for Magnus to move-- Magnus had been sleeping on his side of the bed.

And he hadn't processed it until that very moment: Magnus had switched what side he slept on after Alec had left.

Things like that didn't happen by coincidence. Sure Magnus probably changed sides, occasionally. Committing to one bed side for eternity would get dull. But not after a breakup.

He decided not to say anything.

He'd take Magnus' old side. He got under the sheets and instantly felt at home.

Alec had missed this. He'd missed this a lot.