(y/n) - your name

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I harshly walk past Five before slamming open the doors to the pub, ignoring the men that gave me strange looks as I head straight for the bar. I sat down on a stool and signalled over a bartender who looked at me strangely but just shrugs, serving me shots of vodka, tequila and a couple of chasers. I down a couple of the shots and slam them on the counter, ordering a strong cocktail to drink. I turn around on the bar stool as I leaned back on the counter, scanning the crowd and my eyes fall on Five who had a heartbroken look on his face. He sat at the table with Luther and looked down at his hand sadly before looking at me, but I roll my eyes at him and turn around to ignore the brothers.

Over the happy-go-lucky Irish jig music that was playing-and my alcoholism-I could still overhear Luther and Five as they try to come up with a plan to talk to old Five. "Well, there I am." I look to my right and low and behold, I see Old Five sitting right next to me at the counter. He looks at me briefly and I raise my glass to him and he does the same in a simple greeting.

Luther walks up to me as I down the rest of my shots easily, him patting my head softly. "Are you ok?" I nod simply, not in the mood to talk. The bartender gets me more shots and Luther talks to old Five. "Five..." he clears his throat and Old Five looks up at him.

"What'd you call me, big man?"

"It's me. Number One." Luther says with a grin as he leans down to his brother who looks back at him in shock, dropping his pen.

"Luther." I watch as Old Five slowly moved to grab his briefcase. "How did you..."

"It's ok. Everything is fine. I can explain. But first, I need to introduce you to somebody. Just... promise me you won't freak out."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Uh! Don't freak out. No freak-outs." Luther says and I smack my forehead at this interaction. "All right." he steps back to reveal his brother.

Five comes out of hiding, both Five's staring at each other with wide eyes. "Hey, there stranger." I lowkey thought that they would explode or something but it was just Old Five freaking out. 

"Mind paying for my tab. Thanks Old Five." I mutter out and he blinks at me as I hop off the counter to go get a free table for the boys. They ordered drinks at the counter before coming to the table, Five sitting next to me and I glare at him as I shift closer to Old Five with Luther sitting opposite of me.

I had to be in the middle of both Five's...

I cross my arms and huddle into myself, trying to ignore the Five's glaring at each other.

Old Five looks at me warily, not knowing who I was or why I was here and it made sense that he was wary of me. "Just to clear everything up Old Five, I'm from an alternative universe and I know certain things about the future so don't freak out." I mumble in a monotone voice, sipping on a cocktail that he bought for me after paying for my tab.

Oddly sweet of him.

"Well... this is nice, isn't it?" Luther pipes up, setting down his pint of beer. "The four of us, together like this."

"Don't rope me in this shit." I hiss and Luther gulps when both Five's say 'no' in a threatening tone.

"Somebody explain to me how it is I'm having a pint of Guinness with my younger self."

"Older, actually." I roll my eyes at Five trying to one-up himself and I lean back in my seat. "I'm you, just 14 days older."

"I have pubic hair smarter than you." I choke on my drink at the remark, chuckling into my hand at that remark. "How's that possible?"

"I can explain." Five says, a smirk on his face. "You see, one hour from now, on the grassy knoll, before the president is killed, you break your contract with the Commission. I already know you're thinking about it. All those years in the apocalypse, we never stopped worrying about our family." I falter hearing that, growing at Five who had a grim look on his face and I drop my arms to my side. I look at Old Five who also frowns thinking about his family. "Well, today, you are going to do something about it."

"You're going to attempt to time travel forward to 2019." I pipe up.

"However, you are going to screw up the jump-"

"-and drab me from my universe into this one-"

"-and end up in this twip of a body, trapped forever, small, young adult-"

"-ok!" Old Five cuts me and Five off, growing anxious. "Even if I was supposed to believe you, what am I supposed to do about it, not jump!?"

"No, no. I need you to jump."

"If you don't jump, he stops ceasing to exist and I have a feeling I do too." I point to Five and he pales realising what I meant.

"What I need from you is to jump correctly."

"I'm listening." Old Five nods eagerly.

"The first time through, I got the calculation wrong. That's how I ended in this body and accidentally brought (y/n) here." he looks at me softly but I continue to ignore him, sipping my cocktail and watching the tv. I could see in my peripheral that he was growing annoyed. "But now, I know the correct calculation."

"What is it!?"

"I'll be glad to tell you... in exchange for that briefcase you're holding under the table." Five smirks at his older self.

"Yeah, yeah, so you go back to 2019 as planned, but this time with the right math, so you remain a full-grown man." Luther says.

"In exchange, we get that briefcase you no longer need." I point out, setting my glass down on the table.

"Timeline restored, paradox resolved. Everyone goes on existing happily ever after." Five wrings his hands together, getting all twitchy and sweaty just like his old self.

"That's quite a bit to take in."

"What do you think?"

"I think..." Old Five looks at me and back at his younger self, glaring at Five. "That you're an actual asshole. You said some horrible things to this fine young lady didn't you?" Old Five sends me a soft smile before going back to sneering at his young self.

Well damn, even he knew.

I mean, they are each other so.

"Now, I'm going to go take a piss and you better apologise to her for whatever horrible shit you said." I watch as old Five goes off to go to the bathroom, Luther grabbing a tissue to wipe the sweat off his brother.

"I think that went pretty well, am I right?"

"No, no, there's something... something doesn't feel right about this."

"What do you mean?"

"He doesn't trust himself." I explain and Luther looks at me in confusion.

"But he's him-they're-"

"-yeah I know." I cut off ape-man before his mind breaks. "Just go after him. Please." he nods and stands up, heading to the bathroom leaving me and Five. The Boy continues to fidget and squirm in his seat but he slowly calms down just a tad as he isn't in proximity to his past self. I just stay quiet and frown, watching the crowd around me all laughing in joy and cheering.

These people are real.

They live real lives with real emotions.

Look how happy they are.

I sigh out and cross my arms but freeze when I hear the little assassin next to me clear his throat. "(Y/n)." I grab the sleeves of my dress, fisting it in my hands as I look ignore him while people-watching. "Please look at me." I narrow my eyes in confusion when I hear the hurt tone in Five's cracked voice. I close my eyes and sigh out before slowly looking at him and I can't help but soften seeing the sad look on his face as he looked at me with heartbroken eyes. "I'm so sorry." I don't know what to say, it was like I couldn't talk and I hold myself tighter. "I'm so sorry for everything I said yesterday. I'm sorry for ever saying that I never wanted you here." My heart aches, remembering how angry Five was yesterday and I can't help but feel like I deserve it. 

"You don't need to say sorry Five." I mumble quietly and I could feel him shake in his seat.

"Of course I do! I hurt you so much! I threatened you for God's sake!" I quickly look up, hoping no one was overhearing us. "I'm so sorry for hurting you, for laying a hand on you. I shouldn't have hurt you. Ever."

"Well, you did." I snap back, fisting my hands to hold back from slapping him again. "You choked me! You held your axe at me! At my throat!" He gulps when I flinch at the phantom pain on my neck, looking away as I gingerly touch the skin. 

I turn back to The Boy to see him with a broken look on his face. "You're scared of me..." I don't say anything and he breaks down.

"Five, please. Not here." I whisper to him as people start looking our way from the commotion.

"Then when (y/n)!? When you leave me!? When you plan to leave everyone and just disappear!?" I sneer at Five and his attitude.

"Don't you dare make a fucking scene out here in public." I seethe lowly to him but he doesn't stop. Absolutely red from embarrassment, I grab his arm and pull him out of the pub and into the alleyway next to it.

I didn't want to cause a scene in public!

But this asshole had to start a fucking argument with me then and there!

"Now is not a good time Five! And definitely, not a good time to be throwing a fucking tantrum!" I hiss out softly. "You need to convince your old self to help you-"

"-I don't care about that!" Five pants, his shaky arms reaching out for me but I quickly take a step back away from him and he frowns. "I care about you. I hate that you're scared of me, I hate myself for hurting you. I let my temper and anger blind me and I laid my hand on you, the one person I never wanted to hurt ever!" he paces in front of me, gripping his hair.

"You wanted to hurt me! Don't fucking lie to me!" I yell at him, furious. "You wanted me gone-!"

"-I don't want you gone!" Five exclaims, holding my elbows gently and taking me by surprise. "I never meant those things (y/n)! Please believe me. Don't believe those harsh words. I'm so glad I've met you, I'm so glad you came into my life." he begs me, holding my cheeks as he teared up. "I'm so sorry... I was just so frustrated and hurt that my entire fucking life was some sort of sick entertainment for other people!" He breathes out shakily, stepping away from me as he ran his fingers through his hair. "(y/n), I lost my family twice... I was alone for decades... the Commission tore me up from the inside... and to think that it all was scripted by someone else..." he trembled heavily and I purse my lips, watching him unravel and break down. "I've been hurting and in pain for so long... all the fighting... all the bloodshed... all those deaths..." my eyes widen in shock when The Boy held his chest, his breathing getting shallow all of a sudden and I realise he was hyperventilating. 

I push down my anger and rush towards Five, holding him tightly in my arms as he gasped for air. "Hey... it's ok. I'm sorry... I should've told you earlier. You had a right to know..." he held the back of my dress tightly and I hold back my tears from how much The Boy was hurting.

But he hurt you. He held his axe at your neck.

I know... I can't and won't forgive him for that but it doesn't mean I won't help him. Everyone hurts. One way or another.

"I don't want you gone-I don't know what I would do with myself if you weren't here... Please don't leave me too..." I cradle his head against my shoulder, holding him tight and my chest feels heavy from the sinking feeling that hits me.

"I'm so sorry... for laying a hand on you too..." I whisper to him. "I shouldn't have slapped you. I was just so-"

"-angry...?" Five mumbles as he pulls back from my arms, catching me by surprise when he gently holds my face in his hands as tears ran down his face. He held me as if I was still afraid of his touch... as if I would shatter right in front of his eyes. "I'm so sorry (y/n)." He leaned his forehead on mine, his thumbs brushing my cheeks softly. "I'm so fucking sorry."

"I'm sorry too-"

"-no, you have nothing to apologise for-"

"-I do! I do." I sigh out, slowly breaking my resolve as I reach up to wipe his tears away. "You were right. I should've told you about how I knew everything. I should've told you the minute I saw you. I thought that if I didn't, I wouldn't be hurting you but obviously you are. But none of you are just characters to me. You're still people. You live real lives with real emotions. This world is real. This is your universe. I'm sorry."

"(Y/n) please don't cry. It hurts me seeing you like this." Five mumbles, kissing my forehead and wiping my tears away. "Please, it hurts me that you're so sad. You never deserved those words from me. I was such a cruel person to you." I nod. "Please don't leave me. Please don't leave us. We all care about you so much. You've made us happy in the longest time I've ever seen my family. They love you and it would break them to see you disappear."

I step back from his hands and he looks so heartbroken when I move away from him. "Five... I just can't forgive you... especially from what happened in the boardroom... I can't... I'm-"

-scared...

Of you...

"(y/n)... I'm so sorry... Please-"

"-I just... I just need time... restart-"

"-I lo-"

"-Five, get the fuck away from (y/n)." Five jumps away as Luther growls at him with Old Five standing next to him.

"Luther, calm down. He didn't hurt me, he didn't do anything-" 

"-he made you sad (y/n)." Luther whispers to me. "He hurt you." I look at a Five who was looking down at his shoes in guilt.

"Everything is ok now Luther. We apologised to each other. Everything is fine." I quickly answer, lying to just appease the apeman who nods hesitantly and we all walk off following Old Five. 

"Since the president is being assassinated tomorrow on the 22nd, meet here at the pub, same time today. Do not be late." Old Five warns Five and Luther, walking away and leaving us three to start heading back to Elliot's place.

I walked quietly, mulling over everything Five said. Even though he technically wasn't mad at me anymore, the heavy feeling in my chest was still there.

I know he didn't mean those words.

He was just upset, rightfully so.

Anyone can say anything or do anything in a fit of rage.

I do the same. I mean I slapped him for fucks sake.

I tend to hold it in and then let it all out but I couldn't stop myself like he couldn't stop himself.

But he could've killed me... He can forgive me for slapping him but him being so close to ending my life...

I rub my arms as a chill went down my back, looking up to see Five at the front of the pack looking at me sadly with worry in his eyes, noticing how quiet I was as I just followed the brothers from the back.

He was still unsure if I was scared of him.

He didn't want to cross any more boundaries.

I can't forgive him... 

Not yet.

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