"He had to ship you a million miles away."

"Diego, stop talking."

"That's how much he couldn't stand the sight of you!" I suck in a deep breath, wincing at the stab.

"That's gotta hurt..." I mutter out as I drop the cigarette and stomp it out with my foot.

"Do you not shut up or do you have to say something about everything." Five sighs out and I shrug at him.

"I'm a commentator. It's my thing. People hate it, but I can't help it." Diego and Luther instantly go at each other, swinging fists and dodging knuckles to the face. Everyone quickly grew annoyed at the top two Hargreeves fighting, Pogo trying to get them to stop fighting. Klaus quickly pushes Five and me back to protect us but Five swats his brother's hand away.

"Come on big boy!"

"Hit him! Hit himmmm!" Klaus yells out, cheering the entertainment on.

They are getting too close to Ben's statue.

"What are you doing?" Five whisper yells at me as I walk out from under the umbrella and head towards the statue.

"Protecting Ben's statue!" I call out to him, throwing a thumbs up to the Seance and the Ghost as I stood in front of the statue. Diego got up after Luther threw him to the ground, his back to me and I take my fork out from my pocket.

Five watches in amusement as I shank Diego in the back, him jumping away from the statue with a sharp yelp but quickly dodges a punch Luther was aiming at him. "What the fuck was that!?" he hisses in pain.

"Huh, didn't think that would actually work." I mutter out as Digeo rubs his back, taking out a knife to attack Luther and the brothers move away from the statue. "Ok, my job here is done." I throw Five a thumbs up, walking back towards him as I pocket my fork.

"Good, we don't have time for this." he scoffs, walking back into the house and leaving everyone outside as I follow him. I shiver violently from the cold that hits me, being a little soaked from the rain as I wipe the water off my face. Five turns to me as he puts the umbrella away, sighing in defeat before signalling me to follow him. He takes me to a cupboard and he opens it to grab a towel and passes it to me.

"Oh! Thanks." I dry myself off as I follow him to his bedroom.

"Why did you do it?"

"Do what?" I ask, confused and he looks at me like I'm stupid.

"Protect Ben's statue." I shrug and he narrows his eyes at me like he knew I was hiding something from him. 

"Just in case. Didn't want it to be destroyed..." I mumble out, peering over the stair railing to see Klaus talking with Ben as they walked away. "Anyway, where are we going, old man?" Five doesn't say anything and simply just disappears, leaving me in front of his bedroom and I roll my eyes. "Well fuck you too." I mutter and just decide to do some work as I walk into his room, grabbing my laptop and sitting on the floor to wait out the time for the episode to continue. I was typing away when I hear multiple familiar whoosh sounds, some near and some far but I look up and peek out to look at the open doorway.

"Nothing, absolutely nothing." I heard Five grumble out before I saw him stomp past his bedroom door, putting my laptop away on his desk before I get up to rush after him. I walk down the stairs and head back to the kitchen to see Klaus sitting at the table with a guitar in his arms. I wave to him and he smiles, waving back as I hear another whoosh. 

I look over to see Five teleporting all over the kitchen, looking for something and I just sit down at the table. "What the hell are you doing?" I asked, focusing on Five holding up an empty jar, ignoring me once again as Allison walked in asking where Vanya was and gets told that she left already.

"An entire square block. 42 bedrooms, 19 bathrooms but no, not a single drop of coffee."

"Dang, y'all rich rich. 42 bedrooms. Well shit." I whistled low and Klaus snickers as he strums the guitar mindlessly.

"Dad hated caffeine." Allison responds.

"Well, he hated children, too, and he had plenty of us." Klaus chuckles.

"Klaus, I love you but please put them grippers away..." I scrunch my face as he sticks his tongue out at me, wiggling his toes at me and Allison simply ignores him and his craziness. She walks off and I take out my phone.

"What are you doing? What is that?" Five points at my phone as I was playing a game.

I point a thumb at him, staring at Klaus. "Is he for real? He doesn't know what this is?" Klaus shrugs and I blink at his brother in surprise. "Uh, this is a cordless phone. It's an electronic device that lets you do many things. Like search things up, buy things, text people or call them and write things down." Five looks at me with wide eyes.

"So can it tell me where to find a decent cup of coffee?"

"Yeah, it can."

"Well, what are you waiting for? Search it up." I roll my eyes at the demanding boy, doing what he asked.

"You may be a genius and all, but do you really think this phone is going to work in this universe-holy shit." I looked at the map to see it change and suddenly I see a landmark with Griddy's on it. "This place isn't real in my universe. How?" Five teleports to me and peers over my shoulder as I stare at the newly updated map. "Was it just taking its time to update or something?" I mumble out.

"I'm taking the car." Five says as he takes a step back from me.

"Where are you going?" Klaus sits up, suddenly interested.

"To get a decent cup of coffee." Five teleports and I wonder if I'm supposed to follow him or not.

"Klaus, you mind opening the door for me?" he shakes his head and jumps up with Ben, skipping away to the front door and he opens it for me with a smile. "Thanks! See you later guys!" I wave goodbye to my favourite babies as I skip down the stairs to the side of the road. I waited until I hear a car drive up the road, Five pulling up in front of me.

"You getting in?" he raises a brow at me and I cross my arms.

"Yeah, I don't know if you forgot but I'm somewhat a ghost so..." He sighs out and quickly gets out of the car, opening the passenger door for me. "I didn't think you would actually wait for me." I pat the chair, not phasing through and I carefully get in before he closes the door and rushes around to get into the driver's seat.  

Five raises a brow at me. "I figured that you would be useful to me." He soon drives off towards Griddy's donuts.

"Oh wow. I'm just a tool to you now huh?" he glances at me, pursing his lips with a frown.

"I didn't mean it like that-"

"-Five I'm just joking. I don't take things to heart." I smile at him and he blinks at me. "Eyes on the road old man." he rolls his eyes and focuses back on the road before he has an accident and kills himself.

Can't let that happen now, can we?

"Fucking slow down!" I yell out as Five barely misses another car that was driving from the opposite side of the road, clutching onto the car door desperately as he hits the curb when he abruptly parks at the donut store. "You're a reckless driver!" I hiss at him, feeling my heart beating like crazy as he simply jumps out of the car and opens the door for me. I stumble out, groaning from the spinning in my stomach.

"Hurry up!" I hear Five call out from the front of the store, holding the door open and I narrow my eyes at him before walking up to him. I walk into the store and he follows after, situating himself at the front counter on a stool. He rings the bell and I look around the store, feeling giddy as one of the many badass scenes actually happens in here! Five rings the bell and I move to sit up on the counter next to him, sitting cross-legged.

"You shouldn't sit up there. It's unsanitary." he stares at me and I shrug.

"I'm dead. What harm am I going to do?" I shrug and Five sighs out, lacing his fingers together on the table. "And chill would ya. Agnes is trying to unclog a sink." I explain, looking at the guy that walks into the store and sits himself down next to The Boy.

The said waitress soon comes out, giving that exact same reason as she takes out a pen and pad to take orders. "Told you." Five gives me a knowing look and I give him a shit-eating grin. 

"Can I get the young man a milkshake, a hot chocolate or something?" Agnes asks.

"I would love to get a hot chocolate right about now. It's so damn cold." I groan out, huddling in my hoodie to ward off the cold night.

"The young man wants coffee. Black." Five states, clearly offended.

"Jesus Five, chill. Be nice to the poor woman." I roll my eyes, stretching out my legs and leaning back on my arms as he glances at me, huffing out in defeat but doing as I said. He then gives a wide forced smile, showing his pearly whites.

Poor Agnes walks off confused but does her job as Five turns to me. "Better?" he whispers and I shake my head.

"You just reminded me of the joker."

But his dimples were extremely cute.

Five turns to talk to the man and I just watched in amusement as the older guy just looks at him in confusion. I tilt my head to stare at the boy, him reminiscing about the past of him and his siblings. Of those rare good times he cherished with them with the corner of his lip curled up. I smiled softly at the hint of happiness that shone through before it disappeared as Agnes came back with the orders.

"I got his." The man sitting next to Five paid for his coffee.

"Thanks." he cheers him in appreciation.

"I don't understand how you can drink that stuff. It's so bitter and disgusting." I wrinkle my nose as Five shoots me a glare. "And for that, I ain't telling you the address for the department store you're looking for."

Not like I knew anyway. We jump to the scene instead of knowing Vanya's address or the store with Dolores.

"You're so childish." he whispers and I stick my tongue out at him before he turns to face the man. "You must know your way around the city." he asks him.

"I hope so. I've been driving it for 20 years."

"Good. I need an address." I pull my feet up, sitting cross-legged on the table again as Five and the man continue chatting to exchange information before the man left the shop. The boy folds up the napkin before pocketing it, picking up his cup of coffee. Before he could even take a sip of it, it takes no time for the band of men The Commission hired to find Five and filter into the store. "That was fast." he sighs as he looks at the reflection of the bell, seeing the men behind him. "I thought I'd have more time before they found me." Five says as he looks at me, smirking and I roll my eyes with a smile of my own.

"Ok. So let's all be professional about this, yeah? On your feet and come with us. They want to talk." a guy held a gun to the boy's head.

"I've got nothing to say." Five hums back, leaning back in his seat and I chuckle as he raises a brow at me.

"It doesn't have to go this way. You think I want to shoot a kid? Go home with that on my conscience?" The boy looks at the cutlery next to him and I know it was about to go down.

"Yeah, Five. You don't want to end up like me." I lean down, smirking at him as I joke before hopping down from the countertop.

"Well, I wouldn't worry about that." he says to me and I get hyped.

"Oh baby, y'all fucking screwed!" I yell out with a stupid grin on my face, taking my phone out to play the perfect song for this moment.

"You won't be going home." Five instantly grabs the butter knife, teleporting behind the guy that had a gun aimed at his head and stabbed him in the neck. The men in the shop shoot out instantly, destroying some of the lights as I turned the music up at full volume while ducking down to avoid the flying bullets. "Hey, assholes!" Five teleports next to me on a table, lying on his side and they all turn to him before shooting.

"Oh fuck-" I drop to the floor, hissing loudly as a bullet grazes my shoulder with a barrage of them flying above me, gasping from the pain and the blood trickling down my arm.

How the hell!?

Edited