(Cry/Ryan)

"FELIX!"
I heard my boyfriend quickly turn off the water in the shower and stumble out, running out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist.
"WHAT'S WRONG!?"
"THERE IS A SPIDER ON MY LEG."
"OH MY GOD OH MY GOD"
"WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!"
"STOP DROP AND ROLL?"
"THAT'S FIRE, DUMBASS.
"OH"
"CAN YOU KILL IT?"
"ME?!"
"YES YOU. YOU'RE THE ONLY OTHER ONE HERE."
"AHA YOU'RE ASKING ME TO KILL THAT DISGUSTING CREATURE"
"YES I AM"
"WHY SHOULD I!?"
"FELIX IT IS CRAWLING CLOSER TO ME AND IF IT GOES INTO MY BOXERS AND DOES SOMETHING THAT MEANS NO MORE SEX FOR YOU."
"OH SHIT OKAY HOW DO I KILL IT?"
"I DON'T KNOW JUST GET A PAPER TOWEL OR SOMETHING."
"OKAY." He did that.
"WHERE IS IT?"
"IT'S RIGHT HERE." I pointed to where it was.
"OH OKAY."
"FELIX IT'S GONNA BITE ME."
"JUST SHUT UP."
"OH OKAY SO NOW YOU'RE MAD AT ME?"
"NO."
"ARE YOU LY- OH MY GOD FELIX CAN YOU PLEASE JUST KILL IT."
"FINE FINE JEEZ." He killed it.
"THANK YOU."
"You don't need to scream all the time, jeez. Only in bed."
"I hate you."
"Love you too babe."

a/n

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