“You can’t destroy Neverland.” I gasp and step towards her as an uneasy sensation spreads in my stomach. “Peter Pan is Neverland. If you destroy Neverland, will he die?”

        “Yes. We knew he was under a curse, but we didn’t know he would ever get this close to cursing the entire world with darkness. Magic-at least the magic pertaining to this world-is at stake. If we don’t destroy Neverland, his evil reign will never end. Time will never return.”

        Kill Peter Pan.

        The idea is drastic. Preposterous. Horrifying.

        “But how can you even destroy Neverland? If you destroy it, Peter will die. They are connected. But if we kill Peter, does that still mean that Neverland will be destroyed?”

        “Yes. Peter Pan is the life force of the island. There were beings on the island before Peter Pan, but the island wasn’t Neverland then. It was just an island with magic in its air. Peter Pan is the one who banished time and changed the rules. But only the fae were meant to live forever, and no one was meant to live in one moment for all of time. This mortal world will cave without time and order and light. You must save it. Even if it means killing Peter.

        “I can’t. I’ve never killed or hurt anyone. And I will never do that to Peter.”

        “You may have to, to save him. To save us all.”

        I pace in front of her, my fingers massaging my head. “No. There must be another way.”

        “There isn’t, Wendy Darling. There is no other way.” The queen waves her hand. “Is your head better now?”

        The ache is gone, but the chasm in my heart widens. “Thank you.” There has to be something we are missing. Some other way to fix this. I spin on my heel and stop at the tree. I rub my thumb over the mossy bark. “What about the pirate?”

        “Captain Hook?”

        “Yes. He might be able to help us. I know he is Peter’s enemy, but from what I know, he was a powerful man.”

        “Hook is not human. Besides, he disappeared when Peter Pan banished him. He cannot be found, but I can still sense his presence. It is very strong.”

        I won’t kill Peter Pan.

        Sadness slips through me. It quiets my thoughts and settles over my soul. I won’t.

        “Would you really chose him over your world?” The fairy queen erases the space between us and lifts my chin. “You must make your choice. You are the only one who has seen past his mask.”

        “Brokenness.” I swallow. “That is all he hides. Not malice, not hatred. He’s broken.”

        The queen withdraws her hand. “If there is any other way, I know you will find it. Do not give up hope. But you must prepare yourself.”

        She pulls a dagger out of the folds of her dress. “Gold and fairy dust.” She presses her lips together and nods.

        I reach for the knife, but promise to never use it. Another promise. Promises are easy to make, but hard to keep. “I am not strong enough.”

        “Killing someone isn’t being strong. Many times, it is being weak. But sometimes, life gives us no choice. In a battle or a war, every soldier has to make a choice. To fight strangers, maybe even to kill them, for a greater cause. For their country, their beliefs, their homes. The people they love.”

        “It’s not always like that. Most people just fight to fight. And either way they’ll die.”

        “Wendy…I can only see so much. The future is always changing. He might still survive.”

        I look down and curl my fist around the dagger. A wild thought stabs me. I want to use this knife on the fae creature who is giving it to me.

        I step back, alarmed at the dark thought. I would never do that…but in the end, how do I know to trust her? She is powerful. What if she is the one who cursed the island?

        But when I catch her gaze. I do not see evil or darkness in her eyes. And I know that she doesn’t want to kill Peter Pan, she doesn’t want to destroy Neverland.

        She is trying to save my world because it has become her home.  I cannot blame her for that.

        The queen looks up. “You should leave soon. But first…” Her gaze skims clothing. “It is a beautiful dress.”

        “But not practical.” I bite my cheek. “I know, but I threw my other dress away.”

        “A dress overall isn’t practical. Not in your situation.” She snaps her fingers.  

        I inhale sharply. My dress-including my pocket full of treasures-has been replaced by a black outfit. Even though the pants and boots are comfortable, I can only look at the dagger that now fits through my belt. Like Peter’s.

        And now every gift he has given me is gone. The dress made out of blue roses, the acorn that we both pretended was a kiss.

        The fairy queen rests her hands on her hips. Even though it is daytime, her dress gleams like moonlight and stars burn in her eyes.

        I can’t ask her for something as simple as a dress and a pocket full of rubbish.

        She points at my boots. A simple bag lays on a fallen log. I lean down and open it. “Oh, thank you.” Everything is in here. My dress, the acorn, the blade of grass, the star. Safe.

        “My dear. I understand why you keep pieces of life. But I hope the time will come when you stop holding onto things and start holding onto people.”

        “People don’t stay. I always end up alone.”

        Pain laces her words. “You aren’t alone anymore.” The queen looks like she is about to cry, but instead she does something that surprises me even more. She hugs me. Her arms tighten around me as she tucks my head under her chin. My hair muffles her whisper. “You never were.”

        The queen pulls away from me. “Now, I will send you back. Are you sure you wish to return, Wendy Moira?”

        “I am.” I wrap my fingers around the bag, unwilling to let it go. I’ve lost things in this garden before. I tilt my head. “I’m sorry, your majesty, you know my name, but I still don’t know yours.”

        “Moi-Marie. Queen Marie.”

        I wet my lips and wait for her to send me back. “One more thing, your majesty, what was the name of the man you loved?”

        “His name was Jas. He was fae, like me.”

        “Do you know where he is?” If he is fae then he might find a way around the curse.

        She hesitates and looks away. “No. I do not. I am sorry. Even if you could find him, he still wouldn’t help.”

        I start to turn away, but then she points at my bag. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

        “What?” I fumble with the bag. A sigh drops through me. The acorn is still there.

        “This.” The queen holds out a small stuffed animal. Old and faded, with light brown hair and a black button nose.

        My bear, my childhood friend.

        Memories flash through my mind. The bear tucked beside me as I lay in a crowded room. His nose pressed against mine as I hid under a wooden table. My fingers rubbing its soft belly. A purple butterfly and a black gate I wasn’t supposed to enter.

        “Bear!” I laugh. Tears drift down my cheeks as I press the stuffed animal against my cheek. It was always too precious to name.

        I’m sixteen, not six and red burns my cheeks as I look over at the queen. But she is smiling. “Darling, you have always been brave. And because of it, I will give you one last gift.” The queen touches my forehead. “Your thoughts are your own.  Peter Pan can no longer hear them.”

        I’d never realized how much I appreciated the privacy of my own thoughts. “Thank you. Thank you so much.” I cuddle the bear in my arms. I am dressed as a warrior, but underneath I am still the little lost girl with only a bear for a friend.

        “Goodbye, Wendy Moira Angela Darling. And if you ever need anything just call my name.” The queen waves her hand and golden dust wraps around me.