Heyyyyyy, I'm here. Before you read this chapter, please make sure you've read chapter 30 or at least finished reading it. Most people complained about seeing a blank update, just half of the chapter and not even getting notified of the update at all. You can remove the book from the library and add it again if you have any of the complaints.

  
                               ~Adam~

It wasn't that I don't xcursions or school trips and all that but the fear at the back of my mind, the fear that had always been at the back of my mind would not allow me to want to go.

It would never allow me to be at rest even if I should em.

The fear that I wouldn't meet mom at home, the fact that dad's anger would have made him to something that would be irreversible.

The only time I can stay away from home and be at peace was whenever dad was away on one of his numerous business trips.

That time, I'd at least, know that nothing would happen to mom.

When Sophia tried to push, tried to get me to say that I'd go for the excursion, I had felt something snap in me, something terrifying, the beginning of the anger that always terrifies me, the beginning of the anger that I always have no control over, the beginning of that anger that I might have inherited from dad.

Was this how my dad started too? By going through intense anger, as deep and dark as this? It took me all of my self-restraint not to scream my reply at her and even when I finally replied to her, I saw that look of shock on her face before I walked out of the class.

She was only looking out for me.

She shouldn't be at the receiving end of my bad moods, my anger.

Especially when she has her fair share of things giving her emotional turmoil, which might even be worst than what I was going through.

The Visual Arts Studio was empty when I got there and while I had initially come here to draw or paint or do anything that'd get my mind off my bad thoughts, my mind and hands couldn't come up with anything to dr   aw, min aft taring blankly at atat theanat theI atthey gave up and I stood up from the stool to sit in a more comfortable chair.

I sat there, head turned up, eyes closed, thoughts in a million directions but with one major one, Does it get to Kunmi that I act like this? Does she see me as a maniac or probably bipolar?

I heaved a sigh just as I heard someone open the door. My eyes remain closed as the person walked further into the studio, almost on tiptoes because I could hardly hear the sound of their footsteps but I could almost tell who it was, the floral scent plus the perfect blend of jasmine and rose that alwaysremindeddedededed of a garden of flowers could only be one person but yet, I forced my eyes to remain shut believing that my ears and nose were now acting up.

The scent drift closer as I felt the person walk in front of me and then, that loud thud on the desk. My eyes flew open in time to meet her startled ones. It was her.

My sanctuary.

She smiled tightly, the smile looking more like an apology than an actual smile.

"I'm sorry. I just came to drop this."

She tilted her head towards the direction of whatever she just dropped on the desk but I wasn't even following that, I was just staring at her and trying to think of how we got here.

"I'll just leave now."

She said again when I did not say anything and I was pretty sure that I was creeping her out with the way I was looking at her. She started to walk away and my hands grabbed hers before I could even stop myself. She looked back, eyes wide in surprise, lips slightly parted,

"What...."

"Can you stay?"

The words were out of my mouth before I could stop myself but then, I did not regret saying them. With her, I do more of talking than thinking because if it was the other way round, I'd have probably locked up completely but even though, everything in me was screaming retreat, I just wanted to bask in the pure magic that this girl is.

Maybe for now.

Her eyes grew more huge and she looked stunned, upper teeth biting her bottom lips, probably in nervousness.

"Please?"

She looked even more startled than stunned. Then she looked away from me and I couldn't even start to imagine what was going on in her head.

"Okay"

She finally said, her words coming out slower than usual ass if she was pronouncing the syllable separately as if she couldn't believe that I was asking her to stay.

I heaved a sigh and I let go of her hands so she would be able to sit down. She did just that, right in front of me and she was looking with probineyeses assas trying to read me. I allowed her to do just that with a little smile on my lips.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, now that you're here."

She burst into laughter at my words that might have sounded like a joke to her. When I did not join in, her laughter trailed off and she looked at me, eyes wide, gestures nervous. Did she hat I had been joking all this while?

Well, I wasn't exactly sure of what I've been doing either.

"I... Did. Did something happen during an excursion? Is that why you don't want to go?"

I looked away from her, the reasons why I don't want to go threatening to resurface, instead, I forced them back and I smiled instead.

"Not exactly. I just don't fancy trips like that."

She nodded even though I couldn't tell if she believed my blatant lie or not.

"I don't group trips like that too but since It's in the company of friends, I think it's going to be interesting."

I bet it's going to be interesting but that's not even it. We fell into an uncomfortable silence, the kind of silence that's pregnant with thousand of unsaid words, majorly from my side. I was the one who asked her to stay but I still couldn't think of a single word to say to her.

Nah, I have a million words to say but she would probably bolt out of the door if I should start.

"When did you start drawing?"

She asked and I watched as she picked my sketch pad from the table beside her and she started to flip through the pages.

"Ever since I was small."

I answered absent-mindedly, my mind telling me there is a reason why I shouldn't allow her to be going through my sketch pad, and yet, that same mind failing to remember the exact reason.

"I keep getting surprised by how good you are. I've forgotten that I'm sitting with a god."

I chuckled at the choice of her words and I watched as her eyes glinted even more as she turned the pages, sketches of people, random things, random places, skies, sketches of people, mom's face, Sophia's picture from a fashion week in Paris and sketches of Kunmi...

God!

I sat up.

"Wow. Who is this person that looks like me?"

She shouted-asked and she looked up slowly from the book to my face, then to the book, then to my face again.

"This. isn't. me."

She voiced out slowly, eyes on the sketch and fingers it. It was a random sketch of hers. In the sketch, she was staring at something or someone with awe and wonder, and love.

"This person lookstoo blooksttooe me."

She continued, even more, slowly than earlier, her face tightening into a frown while I just, I could ow do I explain to this girl that no artwork in this world, that no perfect sketches could do justice to how pretty she looked?

How do I explain to her that no perfect blend of pencils could highlight perfectly, her facial features, her almost perfectly round face, the curve of her eyebrows, her almond-shaped eyes, the long eyelashes, her Nubian nose, and her perfect, almost heart-shaped lips?

How do I explain to her that she looked better than all the arts combined?

She looked away from my scrutinizing gaze and with trembling hands, I watched her turn the page of the sketch pad to another sketch of hers. She stopped, the frown on her face evident now and she looked at me curiously, teeth sinking into the flesh of her lower lips, a sign of her nervousness.

"Why do you keep drawing me? And this beautifully? It's under....."

"Because you're beautiful. Because....."

Because I couldn't help but draw you.

Because I keep thinking about you.

Because I couldn't stop thinking about you.

Because If I could have you in my world, nothing else would matter.

Because of a thousand and one things.

But majorly because I like you, a whole lot.

A little bit too much.

I stilled.

I mean, I've always known, even though I never actually spelled it out for myself but now, sitting right in front of me, looking at me through widely curious eyes, hands clamped on my sketch pad on her laps, I just had to come to that realization, that I do like her.

Liking someone wasn't on my radar, liking someone was something I should be incapable of.

Especially, this girl that seems to read me more than anyone else in this world.

This girl.

The pure magic that this girl is.

"Adam????"

I jolted out on my reverie, thoughts disoriented as I followed the movements of her hand that she was waving in front of me.

"Adam, are you sure you're alright? You zoned out for more than 5 minutes."

No, I'm not.

I sat up, my hand running through my hair, then, coming back to rub my face.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just lost track of my thoughts for a while."

She nodded slowly, her eyes still looking at me strangely as if in the space of 10 minutes, I had grown two heads or even more.

She said nothing for a while, her eyes leaving mine to stare at her clamped hands while I positioned myself so I could see her face more clearly.

"You should listen to music when you feel down or probably just draw since you enjoy doing that."

I smiled, leaning forward so that our knees were grazing each other.

"Are you worried about me?"

She looked away from her hands to look at me, a little smile on her lips.

"It's hard not to worry about you...."

Oh wow.

"...........You're like a baby."

What? A baby?

My mouth dropped open and I had to close it again. A baby? Really?

"See, that got an expression out of you."

She said, her lips smiling and her eyes dancing with amusement.

Wait?

She did that to make me...

Wow...

I started laughing before I could stop myself, shoulders quaking and ribs cracking that I had to grab the sides of my stomach.

God!

This girl, where have you been all my life?

My laughter trailed off and I saw that she was still looking at me curiously but she was no longer tensed or nervous, she was now calm. The calm aura that I'd noticed in her whenever she was alone, maybe when she was listening to music in class or sitting in the garden alone. Maybe I'd scared her with my demeanor earlier.

"It's unnerving."

"What's unnerving?"

I asked, leaning even more forward and I could sense that she was becoming more nervous. Maybe it wasn't even about my mood swings, maybe it's just about me.

She faltered under my scrutinizing gaze before she looked away, her eyes finding one drawing that wasn't mine, her eyes focusing on another object of fascination that wasn't me.

"What's unnerving?"

I asked again when I was sure she wasn't going to answer. She did not look at me and I watched as she wound her fingers together.

"The way you look at me, it's like you're looking at something else, something utterly magical, something fascinating and........."

"That's because you're fascinating, magical, pretty, cool, deep, nice, interesting, amazing, and..... Should I go on?"

She was looking at me with those eyes again, eyes that held that curious glint in them, except that they now look more bewildered than curious, more on edge than nervous.

"But why are you so nice to me?"

She asked, her expression blank now and I frowned.

"From the first time we met till now, you've been so nice to me that it's almost unreal. People are only this nice to me if they want something in return..."

"I don't know about that but I'm going to be nicer to you from now on."

Her frown deepened even more.

"Why?"

I shrugged, eyes not leaving hers.

"Does it make you uncomfortable?"

"No... I guess. It.. doesn't."

"Then we're good."

She rolled her eyes and she leaned back on the chair, completely ruining the short distance between us and she muttered something like looks like you and Sophia are both weird.

"You think Sophia is weird?"

"That's her queendom, weirdness."

She replied with all seriousness and I was laughing before I could stop myself.

"Sophia isn't weird she's the most simple person I've ever met."

Her mouth dropped open and she looked at me as if I just came from the past.

"I'm serious. Once you figure her out, you'd understand that she isn't as complicated or weird as she looks from afar."

"I don't think we're talking about the same Sophia."

She replied while shaking her head and the bell went off immediately I opened my mouth to reply.

This fairy-tale doesn't have to end now, does it?

"We're not skipping another class."

She announced and she stood up hurriedly as if she did want me to ask to stay, as I'd she'd stay if I should ask her.

I chuckled to myself.

Or course, we weren't skipping another class, at least not yet.

"Of course not and thank you for staying."

You wouldn't know what you did by the fact that you stayed.

She only smiled at me, tugging at my heartstrings even more.

*************

I picked up Sophia's call at the second ring, it has been two days when I almost snapped at her two days since that day at the Art Studio with Kunmi, two days since I had concluded that I liked her, two days since I've not been able to stop sketching her.

"Babe, what's up?"

"I'm downstairs, come and open the door."

I frowned as I heard the sharp click sound of a call being ended but wait what, she was downstairs?

I left what I was sketching and I was climbing down the stairs before I could stop myself. I opened the door and she was there, dressed in a pair of black jeans and a blue turtle neck top, it was the most covered up that I was seeing her this year. Probably because I've gotten used to seeing her almost every day, I've forgotten how pretty she looked, a startling beauty, like Kunle, once described her, that kind of beauty that'd make you look away once you saw her before looking back to admire her.

"You know, Kunmi shouldn't know that you're still ogling other girls like this. I cannot settle fight oo."

Well, startling beauty until she starts talking.

"What are you doing here?"

"You're very rude."

That was her reply before she breezed past me and she walked inside. I wasn't rude, it's just that dad could be at home, he could be in one of his shitty moods and I wouldn't want my friends to see me as the son of an abuser.

I did not even want them to see dad as an abuser.

I was only free to have my friends over whenever he wasn't around and luckily enough for them, Sophia decided to show up when they both weren't around.

"If you're done admiring the air outside, meet me in your room, fine boy."

She said with a little chuckle when she said fine boy and I shook my head. Maybe Kunmi wasn't wrong to have described her as weird and I would have loved to twat her on her nose but my finger would bear the brunt of it, hitting the sharp tip of her pointed nose hurt more than punching the wall.

I closed the door and I raced up the stairs. Sophia just entered my room and she was taking off her shoes when I entered. I looked at her cautiously, wondering why she was here, especially when her house was far from here.

"Wow, these pictures are still here."

She exclaimed, looking at some framed pictures on my bedside table, a picture of hers from a runway during Paris fashion week, and the picture of the three of us from the Headies award she hosted on the red carpet. She forced us to attend. They were all from last year. Because she's someone I've gotten so used to, I just see her as Sophia, my best friend, not Sophia, the successful girl who has amassed so much success and fame at a very young age. She used to be so busy when we were in Junior class and SS1, traveling around the world, promoting one brand, attending one gala or the other, signing endorsement deals, doing thousands of photoshoots, and then she decided to take a total break from her career when we got to SS2, it took her therapist to convince her to continue working, maybe not fully, but at least, once in a while, to get her mind off everything, to be preoccupied with other things because the Sophia before SS2 was never always in school, she would even miss school consecutively for weeks. Her mom wanted her to start homeschooling when we got to SS2 but our sweet little girl couldn't do that.

Maybe it was easier to forget that she was this successful because she was one Sophia Williams to us, then another Sophia Williams to the rest of the world.

"Wow. Wow.."

She started chanting happily as she got on my bed and she started flipping through the pages of my sketch pad.

"Wow, see all these sketches of Kunmi, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven....."

She stopped counting and she flipped through the rest of the pages in a rush.

"Wow, see all these sketches oo. Just imagine! Five years of friendship and you've never sketched me this much. Oya, sit down, start sketching me. Right now!"

She patted the space in front of her on my bed and she trusty pencil forward. I could only stare at her as if she had grown three heads.

"Oya, do you think I'm joking?"

She continued, even though I could deter the amusement in her voice. When I said nothing and I sat down, she started laughing.

"But then, Adam, who would have thought? God! You're so whipped."

"Says who?"

"Says everything about you. Ehn! I've always thought that Adam would meet a girl that would floor him very soon, maybe when we're in the university or so, I just never knew it was going to be this soon. What a time to be alive!"

I rolled my eyes and I laid down, one hand beneath my head and the other one on my lower abdomen. At least, you thought this would happen someday in the future, I never saw it happening, not in my weirdest imagination.

"But then, you like her, don't you?"

A whole lot but voicing it out would mean accepting it, accepting it would mean thinking about what would come afterward and that, being with someone, being vulnerable with someone comes with my greatest nightmare. I turned sideways so I could see her face and she was looking at me, curiously, as if trying to see more than what I was willing to show.

"Honestly, I don't know... I just..."

I trailed off and she just kept looking at me.

"You just what? Go on. Say the nonsense you want to say."

I would have laughed but the thoughts swirling in my head wouldn't allow me so I said nothing.

"I like Kunmi and I like her even more because of what she has come to mean to you. I've never seen you that way with anyone. It's exhilarating to know that you're capable of that much happiness, to see you that happy with someone, because of someone."

I closed my eyes, mentally concluding that I wasn't ready for this kind of conversation, especially not with Sophia. This conversation would validate everything.

"Sophia, I......."

"You're just like Kunle but while we all know where Kunle is coming from, what has caused him that much distress, what is causing him that too much distress but you, we know nada of those things; what causes your bad moods, what you're suffering from, what you're healing from. We've always wanted to be there for there, in the real sense of being there but then, you've never gotten that vulnerable with us. She could be that person for you, you know, a safe space. We all deserve that kind of person in our lives, especially you."

I looked away from her probing eyes because nobody would understand that my safe space might end up becoming my greatest nightmare. That fear was greater than any other emotions I could feel. I couldn't even start to explain because nobody would understand.

"AND!!!!"

She screamed and I sat up instantly, momentarily alarmed because Sophia never scream.

"Have you seen the way you look at her?"

I laid down back. Kunmi was right. Sophia and Weirdness must be synonymous.

"My God! You look at her like she is capable of plucking the stars from the sky or something. The first time I saw you looking at her that way. I was like God, who is this and what happened to my best friend. God! I never saw it coming."

Her eyes were dancing with amusement as she said the last part and I still said nothing, knowing that she was right with everything she has said so far and still wondering how and when my best friend became talkative like this. I would prefer our silent Sophia over this Sophia.

"God! If one guy looks at me half the way you look at her, I'd elope with him immediately."

That got me laughing. See the girl they are millions of Naira for to be in school oo. I propped my head so I'd be able to see her face.

"I can say more than 20 guys in our school that look at you that way."

She rolled her eyes but she motioned for me to start saying their names anyway.

"Gabriel, Rahmon, Jam Jam, Wale, Juwon, Chike, David, Hassan, Ola......"

"Please, all these guys that you're mentioning, are they in our school because apart from two names, I can't even remember those names not to talk of remembering the bearers."

I chuckled again. Sophia ehn.

"Do you want me to go on?"

I asked again, successfully thinking that I had changed the topic of our conversation but Sophia would have nothing of that.

"Nooo, please. The conversation is about you and how you're going to ask her out because I'm tired of all these going around in circles. I'm very tired."

I sat up again. Who is this Sophia and what happened to the one I know?

"Sophia, what's going on with you today? What happened? Did you hit your head on the road or something?"

She rolled her eyes and she looked at me suspiciously.

"You're trying to change the conversation."

"Yes, because even if I should have this conversation, it should be with Kunle."

She rolled her eyes again.

"Sexism at its peak and you ain't talking your way out of this. I came here specifically to talk about this."

I mentally face palmed myself. God! This version of Sophia, I can't deal with...

"But Sophia, when it was Kunle in this position, you weren't this interested and invested, why me? Ehn?"

She looked away, lips quivering, eyelid blinking repeatedly, her hands clamped together and I froze in some sort of alarm.

"Well, Kunmi isn't Aminah and you ain't Ku...."

"You like Kunle."

It wasn't a question but I at least hoped that she'd laugh at how ridiculous my assumption was and call me stupid for even thinking that way but she did nothing of such, instead her eyes grew warier.

Fuck!

Fuuuuck!!

"You like Kunle."

I repeated, still hoping for a miracle but even if she should say otherwise, I already confirmed it. She likes Kunle. How could I have been so blind to this very simple thing all this while? I mean, I've always thought and felt what was between them was more than ordinary friendship but Aminah happened and I concluded that that deduction was just a silly assumption. But I should have known that there were other reasons why Sophia never liked Aminah, why she was never interested in getting to know her and warming up to her? God! How little do I know of my friends? All this while, she had had to watch them together, had to add that hurt to what she was ready to go through. What a very good friend I've been all these years!"

"Sophia........"

"Yes, I like him." She interrupted me, turning sharply to look at her, eyes blank. This expressionless Sophia was what I was used to, the one who hid everything, perfectly, under the mask of a very detached girl.

"I've liked him since forever. Hell, it hurts more than anything to watch him with Aminah but what can I do? He likes her, he is happy with her. I've been rooting for his happiness ever since I met him. I shouldn't allow my feelings to get in the way."

I frowned and I grabbed her hands, feeling the start of a headache. Had I been so focused on me that I failed to notice how miserable she had been all these while? That it wasn't only getting her sister making her distressed?

"What about you? What about your feelings? What about your happiness? Does he know about your feelings?"

She heaved a sigh, blinking back repeatedly and I could tell that she was very close to having a breakdown.

"I gave up. This made me understand what it means to lose a fight when I've not even started fighting. He likes Aminah a lot and I'll just put him through emotional distress if he should know about my feelings. He deserves to be happy and he's very happy now. It hurt that it's not with me but on the other hand, it's more than enough for me too."

God! My friend had been hurting this much right in front of me and I had no idea. I'd have crumbled if I had to watch Kunmi with another guy. God! I'm starting to feel the need to smoke something.

"But I'm fine, really, or at least, I'm going to be fine. There are a thousand and one guys on the queue so you don't have to worry."

That sounded so much like assuring herself than assuring me.

And that broke my heart even more.

I couldn't think of anything else to say to I just hugged her, my hand tapping her back as if to reassure her. This Girl! God! She wrapped her hands around my lower back and I heard her sniffle twice. I couldn't even start to think of what Kunle would do if he should find out about her feelings if he should know that he had been causing her even more emotional distress. I couldn't start to think.....

"And that's how you successfully changed the topic. Did you think I wouldn't notice?"

She asked with a slight tease in her voice and she pulled back, her eyes dancing with amusement. Gone was the girl that almost had a breakdown, gone was the girl that was hurting more than the rest of us, the facade was back in place, fully.

"You have to do the needful very soon. I mean, I saved Kunmi's number with wiffy. I can't...."

"You did what?"

"I saved her number with Wiffy."

She answered with a casual shrug of her shoulders as if she just did the most natural thing. I Saved Kunmi's number with whiffy.

God! Kunmi was right.

Sophia and weirdness.

Zero difference.

They must have formed that name because of her.

Oh, Med Med!

Sophia likes Kunle, a lot. God! My heart is breaking for her. Like 😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔. Watching someone you like, like someone else has to be one of the most hurtful things in this world. She said she had already given up on her feelings fur him, do you believe her?

And what do you think Kunle would do if he should find out about her feelings??

Mehn! This Sophia in this chapter made me laugh ehn. Oluwa oo😂😂😂😂😂 whiffy? Who saw that coming?

And my sweet lord, my two babies 😩😩😩😩💔💔💔💔

And a lot of readers said they saw it coming, Sophia has a therapist? Why? How come?

See you on Friday or Saturday and if the gods ordain, I might do a double update 💃💃💃. Pray that I get the morale and strength.

Love you guys ❤️❤️❤️❤️