hey

how has everyone been doing?

it's been so long, a year or so? maybe two?

this account has long been dead, and i think both you and i know that. i left without much of a goodbye, saying that high school overtook most of my time, and slowly slipped away into not writing anymore. i left this story on an "[on edit]", wanting to revise it so i could bring you guys a better story, but it never happened. 

i never bothered to save any of my past work because i thought i would finish it and have no need to save a draft, but here we are. most of the writing for the old perfectionist in the beginning chapters are gone; i deleted them after releasing the early chapters, but i still have the later chapters that i have not touched in what feels like a millennia. 

to those who still remember the old perfectionist's story, thanks for even reading that...... thing in the first place LOL. i couldn't believe myself when i wrote that i was satisfied with the ending for that old storyline in the afterword. it was unbelievably horrendous, and i do not understand why so many people liked it in the first place.

i am most likely talking to a ghost town at the time of this note being published since most of you guys have probably moved on from this account, wattpad, or even bts itself. but still, thank you to those who have stuck with this story from beginning to end, to those who stuck with it from its edit to its sad unfinished self, and even to the readers who don't have a single clue what this account is. 

thank you for being with me and for bringing me happy memories.

to be honest with you guys, i have long moved on from bts. i started to fall out of liking the group when fake love was released. i realized their music from that point on was not my taste anymore; even now, their music has never satisfied my tastes well enough. of course, that's not to say that i hate them !!! no, i will never hate the group that probably formed my first friend group, my first attempt at creating a community (with you guys :)), and one of my first obsessions. they are one of the groups that have shaped a part of my past and influenced a part of my personality. (p.s. sorry to anyone who likes them right now, it's just my opinion TT;;;)

i was proud of being a fan before, and i'm proud of their progress now. it's crazy to hear them on the radio singing english or when my teachers decide to randomly play music during class and they come on. it brings back a lot of nostalgia when i hear butter, a song that most people would probably not bother to ponder over once it ends.

i took a break from kpop for a long time because i honestly mostly forgot it existed after slowly leaving bts during that time period, and it popped up on my recommended a few months ago. it feels like i'm someone who is ungrateful when i say this, but i actually got into exo recently. i just went on a whole tangent about bts and now i've just moved onto exo, i feel like i'm cheating when i say it. exo's music...... ghhhhhhhhh, i have them on loop everyday now. their hip-hop and r&b is just too good, i think this group will be the next bts for me in my high school years now ;;;;;;;;; 

the only difference between liking bts and exo now is that i won't tell my friends anymore; i drifted away from my friends who liked kpop before, and i don't want to face another period of endless teasing from the friends i have now lololol. hooray, i'm a closeted, broke, diehard exo fan now !!!! but anyways, i'm just sad that i found them when most of them are in their military days now, but i'll still forever cherish them as they are now and as they have been before. 

i'm going off on a tangent about my life when i should be addressing the main thing here haha. i'll be straightforward with you guys. i don't think i'll be updating perfectionist nor cloudburst anymore. to me, it feels weird if i decide to write about taegguk now when i'm not really into the group anymore and i only see them pop up once or twice on my youtube or something. it's great for nostalgia to look back at, yes, but i just can't write about that ship anymore. i hope you guys understand.

writing on this account was one of my greatest joys back then. for one, it was a big stress reliever so i could let out all of my feelings onto a new chapter. for two, it felt amazing seeing new comments to a new and/or past chapter. votes were not my priority when it came to you guys. your feedback and your reactions were the best thing to wake up to when i checked my old phone for new notifications. you might think it silly, having so many people like my stuff; i thought i was on top of the world during this time. thank you for that.

but other than that, i also want to apologize for not giving you guys a proper explanation. i left this account and never said a word about it to anyone besides the occasional pitiful and pathetic 'updates' on my discussion board. i'm sorry that i put this book 'on edit' feeling eager until i realized my past ambitions had faded. i'm sorry that cloudburst, a second story i thought would show a better writing style and a better me, will not fully convey my message now. i'm sorry for the sudden announcement of parting ways with this account at an unexpected time and place when you guys have all probably moved on by now. i'm sorry for letting you guys down.

i think that's all i've been wanting to say. nowadays, this account has just been used to release my pent up frustration over not being able to publicly fangirl over exo and over school. now that i type that out.......... i feel like a stupid person lol. outside of this account, i'm just a boring girl who is indecisive and stubborn. my life has now just been currently consisting of high school and reading chanbaek ao3 fics on the side....................

ahhhh i feel so embarrassed typing that out //o\\

i don't want to end this on a sad note, so i hope you guys have an amazing day/night, wherever or whenever you are. i hope you guys have matured into wonderful people, to whoever is reading this. thank you for taking the time to read all of this or even skimming it if you did :)

if u guys have any questions, u can dm me on my discord, firekirin#4804, or just send me a pm on wattpad since i'll probs be lurking hehe

i hope you guys have happy days, ily all ( 'ㅅ' )b !!~~

- fluffy (aka going by kirin now) <3