"Do you regret it now?"

"Now that I'm gone, are you f-FuCkIng proud of yourself?"

"It took me dying to get outta your pathetic little life, didn't it Katsuki?"

"Tch," she chuckled, "I hope you're fucking miserable."

"I hope I haunt your every w-WaKiNg mOmEnTs."

"I hope you cry yourself to sleep every night."

"I hope the guilt eats your sorry ass alive Katsuki!!"

"y-YoU did this to me!"

"I'm gone!"

"a-AnD It'S yOuR f-FUcKiNg fAuLt!!"
~~

Katsuki immediately sat up in his bed. His breathing was heavy and his body was drenched in a cold sweat. His vision was blurred by tears as he slowly began to sob into his hands.

This is Katsuki Bakugo. The man who's pride clouded his judgement. The #2 Hero. This arrogant, head strong, egotistical, hot-headed, firecracker was bawling his eyes out.

And it wasn't the first time.

(Y/n) had died about 2 weeks ago, and the ash blonde male has made no progress towards recovering.

The wounds were still fresh and far from healing; that's if they even heal at all.

Katsuki had went the first week without a wink of sleep. He locked himself in his house for that week and cried till he past out from dehydration.

He spent that week torturing himself. He thought to himself that he didn't deserve sleep. He didn't deserve food. He didn't deserve water. He didn't deserve company. He deserved to be miserable, he confirmed.

(Y/n)'s funeral was yesterday. It was closed casket because the doctors didn't think it'd be appropriate if her friends and family saw her tattered body.

Katsuki went. Of course he'd go. Despite all the glares full of hate and disgust he still went to the funeral and placed a regretful kiss upon her ebony casket.

(Y/n)'s mother had cursed his name and swore regence, but (Y/n)'s younger brother Niko held her back from using her quirk. Niko flashed Katsuki a look of remorse and disappointment gaze through his puffy hazel orbs before lugging his mother away.

So now, Katsuki is sitting in his empty kind sized bed. Missing the coolness his partner used to provide. He loved (Y/n)'s cooler body temperature. It made cuddling with her perfect as the two never got to hot nor cold.

Katsuki turned his tearful gaze towards his alarm-clock and waited for his eyes to adjusted to the bright, red numbers.

3:46 am

Katsuki groaned as combed a hand through his sweaty ash tresses. He looked over to his left at the space were she usually lie.

Katsuki felt a pang shoot through his heart at the empty space. He had thought of the genius plan of placing one of (Y/n)'s shirts over her pillow. That way he could have her enchanting scent lull him to sleep. But now, it's just a painful reminder of what he lost.

Wiping his eyes, he groggily climbs over the pillow impersonating (Y/n) and began to sift through her drawers to find (Y/n)'s lucky dream catcher.

As pathetic as it sounds, Katsuki doesn't know how much longer he could take those nightmares.

Upon searching the drawer, his hand brushed against an object that rattled in response to the contact. Curiosity plucked his senses as he pulled out a bottle of pills from her bedside table.

His brows furrowed at the small bottle labled Melatonin and grasped it in his fist.

'She couldn't sleep.' He concluded. His chest tightened as he clutched the bottle, desperately fighting the earge to cry at the realization.

Katsuki raised a shaky hand towards the child-safe cap and opened it. He poured 2 pills in his hand and threw them down his throat.

He closed the bottle and placed it back on (Y/n)'s side table. He slowly reached out and grasped the small dream catcher, carressing the turquoise feathers before hanging it above the bed's headboard.

He slowly tucked himself back under the covers and eyed the (Y/n) pillow. His heart grew heavy as he reached out for the pillow and encased it in a tight hug.

"I-I wish you were here." He whispered as he let the tears freely spill from his eyes. He burried his face in the (Y/n)-scented pillow and cried himself to sleep again.

~~

"Ah. It's great to finally meet you Mr. Bakugo. I assume you got my email, correct?" The doctor spoke in a professional tone.

Katsuki simply hummed in response and shoved his fists into his pockets.

He was here for closer. The closer Izuku promised him.

As he and the doctor walked side-by-side through the iodoform tainted hallways. Katsuki scrunched his nose at the smell, but tried his best to ignore it as they twisted through the busy corridors.

They arrived upon an office. It was neat and spacious despite the small room. The doctor gestured Katsuki towards the chair that sat opposite from the desk. The doctor took a seat and scoot his wheely chair up enough so that he could begin rummaging through his clustered desk.

"So," he cleared his throat, "how've you been Mr. Katsuki?" He asked.

The blonde male peeked through his messy tresses and blinked boredly at the doctor. The male before him merely hummed as he continued his search.

"Ah. Guess you're not much of a talker? I'm sorry for the mess by the way. (Y/n)'s quirk was incredibly difficult to comprehend for most of us doctors here. Her files and charts are all over the place." He informed with a humourless chuckle.

Katsuki continued to bored holes into the man as he began slouching in the very uncomfortable.

"Oh. I hope that chair isn't too uncomfortable. I'm getting new ones in a few days. I could bring you a new one if tha-"

"Cut the shitty small talk. I just want the message." He growled huskily. He was growing impatient and the small talk was just twisting his nerves.

The doctor clear his throat and nervously nodded as he began to pick up the pace. After what felt like centuries, the doctor moved a stack of papers and revealed a small, gray rectangle.

Katsuki's heart dropped as he abruptly sat up in his chair and leaned towards the doctor's desk out of curiosity.

"I-is that it?" Katsuki pointed at the box. The doctor gave a solemn nod and reached over the desk to give Katsuki the box.

"We always make sure to record are patients in the ICU. We never know when their words could be their last." He answered sincerely.

Katsuki's hands trembled terribly as he reached out for the tape recorder. His sweaty palms shakily grasping the object as his fingers hesitantly hovered over the play button.

"I'll give you some space." The doctor spoke as he got up and left his office, making sure to close the door behind him.

Katsuki sat completely still in the chair. His breathe heavy and ragged as his thumb caressed the play button. He encased the recorder in both of his hands before taking a few deep breathes, and pressing play.

There was slight static emitting from the small machine before a woman's voice spoke, it wasn't (Y/n)'s.

"Doctor!! The tools aren't working on her!! They keep phasing through her body!" A woman, to what Katsuki assumed was a nurse. His heart grew heavy at the words.

There were muffled shouts and a raspy scream in the back which had Katsuki clutching the device tighter. As the static cleared, a voice began to speak. A voice who knew all too well.

"A-am I gonna die!? AM I GONNA DIE!?" The voice cried.

Katsuki felt his eyes begin to burn. His chest had begun to constict him.

"P-please! Please don't l-LeT me die!!" She pled.

"D-don't worry baby. You're gonna be fine." Katsuki whispered as he cluched the recorder, his eyes already blurred from the incoming tears.

He heard crying and hiccuping over the tape, along with coughing and gagging.

"I'm gonna die! I'm g-gonna die!!!" She cried.

"N-no no baby. You're gonna be ok." Katsuki mumbled as silent tears began to stream down his face.

"Tell him! Please tell him!!" She screamed at no one.

Bakugo heard a small voice in the back ask 'tell who'.

"K-Katsuki!! t-TeLl Katsuki Bakugo!!" She begged.

"Tell him that I forgive him!! Tell him he was an asshole, but I forgive him!! C-can you tell him that!?!" She questioned as she continued to choke and gag.

"Tell him-" through was a pause between her statement as a heavy pant could be heard,

"Tell him that I love him!! C-can you tell him that I love him?!" She pled through her strained voice.

Multiple 'yes's could be heard in the background.

"A-and-!! a-AnD!! And-!!" She panted heavily as a high pitched 'beep' could be heard in the background.

Katsuki's heart stopped as he heard the loud beep echo off the walls of the empty office. He heard bustling and shouting coming from the tape before it clicked and silenced itself.

Katsuki held onto the recorder as he began to silently sob to himself. (Y/n)'s words echoed through his mind as she cried and pled for her life.

So many scenarios began to buzz through his mind at the possible routes that could've happened if he hadn't let her go.

Maybe if he hadn't yelled, maybe if he hasn't insulted her, of he hadn't hit her, hell if he had never cheated! (Y/n) would still be here. She'd be there smiling her brightest smile as her and Katsuki spoke happily of their future together.

The house that they lived in was going to be the start of their future together. (Y/n) occasionally talked about children. As insane as the thought was, Katsuki didn't mind the idea (well he didn't mind the idea of making them anyway).

She spoke about always being there for Katsuki. Promising to be his #1 fan, his #1 supporter through thick and thin. If Katsuki needed a support, she would be there, if he needed a boost of motivation, she would hold him tight and whisper so many encouraging words that would swell Katsuki's heart. If he just wanted to be alone, (Y/n) would crawl into bed with him and caress his hair until he fell asleep in her arms.

She was his #1. Hell, he wishes it was him in the car that night instead of her. But...the damage is already done.

Katsuki's sobs began to faulter as he heard a few gentle knocks of the office door. His lips quivered as they struggled to mumble a small 'come in'.

The doctor slowly peeked through the door, before hesitantly stepping into the room and sitting at his desk. He nervously cleared his throat and spoke.

"I'm so, so sorry for your loss Mr. Bakugo." He began, "I promise you we tried our best, but her injuries were too great, and her quirk's constant activation made it impossible."

Honestly, the doctor's words had fallen on deaf ears. Katsuki was too busy drowing in his negative thoughts to concentrate on the doctor's shitty apology.

"Uh. The nurse's believed that when she continued to repeat 'and' she may have been trying to ask for another famile member or friend." He informed.

He wasn't sure id Katsuki was listening or not, but he knew that he was entitled to give this information. Even if the person was accepting it or not.

"Um. (Y/n)'s quirk caused her to faze through her vehicle. She would've escaped with only minimal injuries, but her car had swerved into the opposite lane and...and there was a truck there." He paused. He took notice of Katsuki's now silent state and decided it was time he wrapped up his little speech.

"I'm obligated to give you this, Mr. Katsuki." The doctor said as he slide a light blue and green pamphlet across his desk and towards the distraught man before him.

Katsuki peeked through his hands and eyed the neatly folded paper before him. He didn't feel like reading it, all he needed to see was the big 'Depression' and 'Suicide' printed in dark blue letters.

Katsuki gave the doctor a confused, and almost offended glare as he didn't make any moves to take the pamphlet.

The doctor began tugging at his collar as the intense glare began to make him feel like putty under the male's heated scarlet glare.

"U-uh don't take this the wrong way Mr. Bakugo. I-it's just protocol for those who loose close family and friends and who aren't the most-"

Katsuki didn't let the male finish his statement before he stomped out of the office.

The doctor though. He felt...uneasy. He didn't like the dead glares Katsuki gave him. He didn't like the dull scarlet orbs that pierced his being and shook his very core.

He didn't know what to do. Should he tell someone? Warn them of the possible threats that could lingure behind those alluring ruby eyes?

No. No no no. He's overreacting he thinks to himself. He's griefing. People grieve in different ways. I'll let him be.

"Poor guy. He really loved her." He said to himself as he began to organize the papers on his desk.

He stood up to reach for more papers before an object on the floor caught his gaze.

"Oh. He left the tape." He said to no one as he walked around the desk to pick it up.

"He'll be fine...I hope."
~~