"So, how's Tawny doing?"

With my eyes glued to my laptop and not wishing to talk as I looked over the club's sales report summary, my left shoulder lifted a little.

I heard the wheels of a chair on the other side of my desk move, and my eyes did a quick roll, looking up, then back down to the laptop after seeing Arnie take a seat.

"Still haven't heard from her, hey?"

"Nope," I muttered.

"Have you tried calling her?"

My eyes shot up, and my brows quickly formed into one. "What kind of question is that? Of course, I called her. Not only did I call, but I texted her as well. Numerous times."

"How bad did you piss her off?"

I sat tall, folded my hands together on top of the desk, and then glared at my annoying brother, wishing I could snap my fingers for him to disappear. Then, knowing it was something I couldn't do, I responded, "I didn't do anything to piss her off."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. All I did was tell Tawny what her father told me. It was hard to inform her of what he said. And I struggled with how, where, and when to tell her all day long. I may not have done it in the right way, but it was the only way I could think of doing it."

Arnie looked confused. "I understand she needed to know the truth, but couldn't you have just told her that her father needed to see her? And that he had some important things to tell her?"

"I could have, yes. But I wasn't sure if Tawny ever visited Roman; he'd tell her what he told me. And felt if by telling her everything I knew, it would help her frame of mind when the time came she visits him asking he tells her the truth about his infidelity and the siblings she never knew about."

"I see your point," he said, twisting his lips. "Do you even know where Tawny is?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Damn. You buy her a new car, and then she leaves. Are you sure she wasn't using you to get a car after what happened to hers a couple of years ago?"

What a stupid question.

I furrowed my brows. "You're an idiot. No. Tawny didn't use me; she's nothing like my ex. For your information, the night Tawny left, she thought she was driving that piece of a shit car she had. She never knew I bought her one until she left her trailer that night."

"So, where is she, then?" Arnie asked, causing my blood to want to boil.

"I did find out Tawny paid a visit to her father about a week ago. Where she is now, I don't have a clue. I'm sure she went somewhere private to process everything he told her. And if that's what she did, I'll give her that space she wishes to have."

"The least she could do is let you know she's okay, or even tell you where she is."

Yeah, I know. And I wish she would do just that. But I can't make her do that either. Tawny's also an adult, and she can do as she pleases, without the likes of me telling her what she needs to do.

"She'll call when she's ready to talk."

I hope.

"Well, for your sake, I hope you're right. I know how easy it is for you to screw things up. Especially relationships."

You don't have to remind me.

I was done talking with him and leaned forward, focusing my eyes back at the sale report numbers for the month, groaning, "Don't you have somewhere to be?"

"We'll talk later," he responded, standing. "Do yourself a favor and think long and hard about what you're hiding from Tawny, as well. Then, if and when she comes back and still wants you in her life, you also need to tell her the truth. About everything..." Arnie added as he walked out the door.

Thank God he got the hint.

After Arnie left, my eyes quickly rolled over to my phone, looking to see if that little blue L.E.D. light was flashing, alerting me that I had a waiting message to be read.

And, of course, it wasn't.

Skye promised that if she heard from Tawny, she'd let me know right away, but because of their friendship, I questioned if she even would let me know, mostly if I had upset her in any way.

The longer the room was silent, the more I thought about Tawny. And I became more worried—worried about her being so distraught after visiting with her father, her state of mind wouldn't have her thinking as she should, causing her to go off the deep end or even into a car accident.

I know I said I'd give her space, and I keep telling myself to continue doing so, but I also can't help fear the worst. So, being the worried guy I am, I called as many hospitals in Minnesota as I could. With all of them saying she's not there.

I felt somewhat relieved, but it wasn't enough. So, I decided to message Skye.

Me: I know you said you'd let me know if you heard from Tawny, but I'm starting to worry about her. Has she contacted you at all?

Thirty minutes later, my heart picked up speed when I heard my phone alert me a message had arrived. Of course, I hoped it was Tawny, but in my heart, I knew it wasn't her and that it was Skye responding to me.

And it was.

Skye: Sorry, Ian, I still haven't heard from her, which is also worrying me. I promise, if I hear from her, I'll call you right away. Please do the same.

Fuck...

Me: Thanks. And I will.

My nervous, trembling fingers raked through my hair, wondering where she'd be.

I've been to the cemetery. A few times...

I've been to her house. A few times...

I've been to her favorite coffee house—numerous times.

I've also been everywhere else. Skye said I'd most likely find her.

The thought of Tawny out there somewhere, hurt, vulnerable, in danger, helpless, or because of me, moneyless, is causing me to feel sick with apprehension.

I rested my elbows on the top of my desk, then lowered my face in the palms of my hands.

Think Ian, think.

After much thought, I finally realized where I needed to go. Even though I'm not sure they'll let me in at this time of night, it's also worth a shot.

I abruptly stood, snatched my phone, then hurriedly rushed out of my office, through the club, then raced down the stairs, not caring I was bumping into anyone and everyone in my way.

Thankfully, my feet knew where to lead me because my mind sure didn't.

I hopped in my car, and then with my wheels squealing, I sped off as if the police were after me. Although it was well after visiting hours and knowing there was no way in hell they'd let me talk to Roman, I wasn't sure as to why I was speeding, but I continued with hopes I wouldn't see any cherries, those bright red and blue flashing lights, appearing in my rearview mirror.

Fifteen minutes later, I walked into Hazeldon treatment center for them to do what I thought they'd do, turn me away, saying to come back during visiting hours. Even the man I paid extra money to give Roman the best care, his doctor, told me the same.

I felt depleted after exhausting all avenues and drove straight home instead of going back to the club, where good Ole Johnnie Walker was calling my name, offering his assistance the moment I entered my home. So, I took him up on his offer and poured myself a glass of the rich, decadent amber, warm-in-my-belly colored scotch.

I raised the glass to my nose, closed my eyes, and inhaled, taking in the delicious tasty spicy scents of vanilla and honey. And then I satisfied my palate after taking a much-needed long sip.

"Just what I needed," I murmured.

The plan to get Tawny off my mind by drinking one glass after another wasn't working. So I poured another glass, doing precisely what I warned Tawny never to do by filling it to the rim.

I took a drink, then lifted the glass and stared at it, mumbling, "I'm missing you, and it's coming in waves, causing me to drown tonight. What are the chances the reason I can't get you off my mind is that I'm on your mind as well?"

Hmm?

My eyes closed, knowing damn well there was no way I was on her mind, then in disgust, my mouth partly opened, snorting, "Slim to none."

Moments later, my inner voice was like a broken record, repeating, quit feeling sorry for yourself, and get your drunken ass to bed. So, I did. But instead of closing my eyes and getting the rest my mind and body needed, I found myself reading that damn book my mother was adamant about me finishing.

A couple of hours later, I was in the last chapter. And I was fighting with my eyes to keep them from closing. All I wanted was to finish the book, so I could return it before I found myself in an embarrassing moment of someone finding out what I've been reading.

The fight was on, but when I heard the sounds of knocking coming from my front door, my eyes opened wide. I jumped out of bed, then sprinted to the door and opened it.

Now I know why God intended for me to be put on this planet. And that is so I could hold the one who needs to be held in their darkness so they could see the stars, to mend their broken heart, and to love them in a way they'll never forget—giving them all the reasons to forget the bad and focus on the good.

Because there she was, standing on my doorstep, her eyes swollen, puffy, and red, along with massive dark circles underneath her eyes, overpowering her once beautiful bronze-colored skin—looking as if she hadn't slept in a week.

Before I could say a word, she quickly reached for me, wrapping her arms around me tight while burying her head on my chest, "Hold me," she quietly wept, "just hold me, please."

With Tawny in my arms, I pushed the door shut, lifted her, and then I quietly carried her through the house and to my room while holding her tight against me.

At times, I may be an idiot and do or say stupid things I shouldn't. But one thing I learned is that the best way to speak to someone and their heart is without saying anything. And nine times out of ten, actions speak louder than words. And that time is now. It'll get her finally to realize I'll always be here for her, no matter what she's got going on.

I'll also give Tawny all the smiles she needs, hoping it'll help make her forget whatever pain she's in right now.

It's like my mother always says, and I tend to agree with her. 'Sometimes, it's the simplest things that someone can do that'll mean the most to them.'

With Tawny lying in my arms, snuggling tight and still weeping, it tells me everything I need to know; she needs me. And she's more than welcome to have all of what she needs from me.

More importantly, the sleep deprivation that tremendously displayed on Tawny's face tells me she needs all the rest she can get. And I will allow her to get that—assuring Tawny; I'm not leaving her side by holding her for as long as she needs me to.

I tightened my arm around her, and with my free hand, I ever so lightly slid my fingers through her hair, tucking it behind her ear, then lowered my lips to her forehead, kissing it and whispering, "I love you, sugar lips. Get some sleep."

I, too, needed sleep. And I'd like to say I can now close my eyes, knowing Tawny is safe and here nestled against me, but I couldn't. As all I wanted to do was watch her sleep, breathe, and twitch from whatever nightmare that decided to enter her dreams.

I reached for my phone and, using one hand, I messaged Skye and Hannah, letting them know Tawny was okay and that she was with me. Then, I immediately shut off my phone, not wanting any sounds my phone may soon be making, awake her.

***

Twenty-eight hours.

Twenty-eight hours is how long Tawny has slept so far, how long I've been awake, and how long my eyes have been on her.

It's also how long I've had to take a piss.

And I worry if I were to slide myself out from underneath her, to relieve the discomfort of my bladder, she'd awake.

The longer I waited, the more my bladder hurt, and the more my eyes were filling with tears.

Fuck...

Just go, Ian. She'll understand.

"Sorry, Hun. I have to relieve my bladder; I promise I'll be right back," I whispered, gently removing her from me.

A sound of disapproval left her lips.

"Sugar lips, I really, really have to go. If I don't, we'll find ourselves lying in one massive warm puddle—something I haven't done since I was a toddler."

Her eyes fluttered open.

"I promise to be right back."

Without saying a word, her eyes closed, and she rolled off me.

Feeling relieved she's trusting me to leave, I let out a sound of happiness, then hurried to the bathroom, with another sound of pleasure exiting my lungs as everything I've held in for over a day came out.

Finally, I was back in bed, and as I brought Tawny back in my arms, her head tilted back with her eyes opened, looking as if she was studying me.

"Morning, princess."

"I'm no princess," she muttered softly, with a bit of hoarseness in her voice.

"Sure you are," I assured. "Especially my princess," I emphasized, grinning.

She lowered her head back on my chest, shaking it. "I may be yours, but I'm no princess. I'm not a daughter of a monarch. I'm a daughter of a peasant who thought it was okay to stick his dick inside another woman to get what my mother couldn't give him."

My lips tightly pursed.

Shit...

The one thing I didn't want to do to start the morning was upset her. So, while caressing her arm, I lowered my face and gently pressed my lips to hers, then changed the subject. "How was your sleep?"

"To be honest. It was the best sleep I've had in days."

The corner of my lips curved upward. "That's good. It's what I wanted to hear." I glanced at her beautiful face, studying all the attractive features I hadn't seen in a week, and noticed that the heavily dark circles underneath her eyes and the redness and swelling when she first arrived were diminishing. Then my brows drew down as I asked, "Can I ask when you last slept?"

Her head lowered down my chest, sighing, "The day I left the resort."

"That's what I thought."

"Why?"

I curled my finger under her chin, then guided her head back my way and looked her in the eye. "Because your eyes told me that you've lacked sleep all week. You also slept for over twenty-eight hours."

Her head snapped upward. "I did?"

I nodded.

Looking confused, she asked, "How did I not awake when you left for wherever you had to go?"

I smiled while softly tracing her face with my finger. "Because I never left. You asked that I hold you, so that's what I did."

Tawny's eyes grew wide. "You held me that long? And without getting out of bed?"

"Yes," I grinned. "I wanted to make sure you slept. And I wanted to make sure you received the security you were seeking."

"You didn't have to do that," she pouted, "you must be thirsty and hungry by now."

"I'm starving," I emphasized. "What about you? Are you hungry?"

She shook her head, sadly saying, "Not really."

I figured she'd say something like that. I know women. And usually, when they're deeply hurt and upset about something, they'll refuse to eat. Most of them, anyway. Some women drown themselves with a giant tub of ice cream or a bottle of wine.

I cupped her chin, and knowing I had the worst case of bad breath—the stench of scotch, and whatever else I had the other night, I still covered her lips with mine, lovingly kissing her while hoping the hot garbage smell and taste wouldn't cause her to gag. "You need to eat, and I won't allow you to starve yourself."

Thankfully, her face didn't turn sour, and she didn't gag from the awful taste of my breath still lingering on my breath.

However, the next thing she said hit my heart.

And not in a good way.

"A few months ago, you would have allowed that to happen. And I'll never forget that twenty-dollar advance you gave me to get by on for an entire week. Had it not been for Hannah's compassion, I would have starved to death."

"I was an asshole," I quickly replied, then remembered what she was filling her stomach with to get by until she got her first paycheck. "But I still used what heart I had at that time and took you shopping, so you weren't living off those nasty Ramen noodles."

She furrowed her brows. "That's because of your mom and sister. If they never got on your case to show how nice you could be, I still would have been eating those," she reminded, sounding as if she was trying to pick a fight like old times.

I'm not falling for it.

Those bickering and bantering days with Tawny are officially over.

After unexpectedly falling in love with her and not wanting to lose the one and only woman who drives me absolutely crazy, I knew there were things in my life I needed to change and decided to turn over a new leaf—something long overdue.

I shifted my body away from her. Then, as I slid off the bed, I brought her with me, then lifted her into my arms, and began heading to the bathroom. "Come on, we're going to soak in the tub, clean up, and then with no if's, and's, or but's coming out of that beautiful mouth of yours, I'm making you a killer breakfast that you're going to eat."

***

Tawny quietly laid in between my legs, with the back of her head resting against my chest, and as I lathered her body with soap, she finally spoke, causing me to halt what I was doing. "I went and visited with my father."

Even though I knew she did and knew the answer, I still asked, "How did it go?"

"He told me everything you told me. But in more detail," Tawny quietly added, then as she continued, I heard the tears forming in her voice, "Every question I had and asked, he shocked me by answering every one without asking why I wanted to know."

That's a good thing. I'm glad Roman manned up as I asked him to do for the if and when that time came of telling Tawny everything.

Instead of interrupting, I remained quiet and let her continue.

"After learning about what he did and why, I tried my damndest to put myself in his shoes—trying to make sense of it all. But I couldn't. I just couldn't make sense of why he did what he did," Tawny cried, "my dad kept claiming he loved my mom and insisted he was never in love with Aliyah."

"Aliyah?"

She sighed, uncomfortably, saying, "The woman who gave him the kids he always wanted—the homewrecker."

I wanted to face-palm; what a stupid fucking thing to ask.

That was a no-brainer.

"She gave him what my mother couldn't, and because of that, I wish now more than ever my mom was here, so I could ask why she refused my dad's offer on adoption. Had she given in and accepted that she could no longer have children, my father never would have gone to the next avenue. He would have remained faithful. They both would have had what they wished to have, and she would most likely still be here. My mother would never have been depressed, and my father would never have turned to using drugs, thinking that was the answer to all of his problems."

She rolled to her side, tightly wrapping her arm around me, quietly saying, "This entire week, I thought about everything he said and how he acted when he admitted to everything. As much as I want to kill him and hate him for the pain he caused us all; I can't. And the one big reason I can't is that even though he got what he wanted and wished to have, my dad didn't get everything he thought he'd have—happiness. He's as miserable as can be. So, after a week of construing his actions, I realized that what that woman gave him never truly made him happy. And I feel it's because those kids never came from the woman he loved. My father loved my mom, and as strange as this may sound. I believe he truly did."

"I don't think that's strange of you to think that way," I admitted. "Although, I will agree that what your father did was selfish, disgusting, and uncalled for. And that he could have handled the situation differently. That said, I commend you for accepting his claims that he loved your mother," I said, kissing the top of her head and squeezing my arms tighter around her little body.

"My father may have done the unthinkable, thinking what he did was okay, and without thinking how it would affect my mother and me, but the fact is, it still happened. And because of the choices he chose to make, he's now dealing with the consequences. I'm still his daughter who wishes him well, and with me, also choosing not to be his enemy. I'm better than that."

There's my girl.

I tapped the tip of her nose, smiling. "One could learn a lot from you."

"Like you," she quietly giggled.

"Yeah," I grinned. "Someone like me. To which I'll admit, I've learned a lot from you."

She tilted her head back, giving me a smile I hadn't seen her do in a long time. A mischievous smile as she said, "I thought maybe you learned a few things from that Nora Roberts novel sitting on your nightstand."

I hope you enjoyed the chapter!! 🤞🤞