Batman: Oh, my queen... (kisses locket)

Robin: Padre, I- EWWWWW! Are you kissing a locket with a woman's picture in it? 

Batman: Uh, no! I was just polishing this jewelry with my mouth hole! You know, like this! (falsely demonstrates)

Robin: Gross!

Batman: Listen, son, this might seem surprising and/or super cool to you, but I think I might have found you a new mom.

Robin: -gasps- Are you sure it's not one of those evil moms from the movies?

Batman: Why?

Robin: Because she might make me sweep up the cinders and then not let me go to the ball! And then I'll never meet my princess! (Cries)

Batman: Kid, we're gonna have to have another talk about fantasy and reality.

(Source: Married to Money)