Everest stood there, trembling in fear as she watched Marshall silently sobbing in the doorway in obvious shock. She felt terrible for him, realizing if he really did just see her, how much fear and pain she must've forced onto him. She for one had seen him in a similar situation, but even then she knew it had to have been worse for him. His initial trauma was seeing her die after all.

However, even if she usually put him before everything, including herself, her natural fears and worries took control. She was eager to think of some way out, but clearly, he must've seen enough to know what she was going to do. Lying her way out of this one would be anything but easy.

"M-Marshy?! H-how long have you been there?" She asked worriedly. Instead of responding, the Dally walked closer to her and threw his arms around her, holding on to her like if he were to let go, she'd turn to dust and disappear right before his eyes.

"W-why?" He croaked, tightening his grip. Even if it wasn't directly, the Husky's question had been answered, and that only swelled her fear. As much as she wished she could jump back in time and fix this mistake, there was nothing she could do. Only hope and pray she could somehow get out of this mess she had put herself in.

"Uh, i-it wasn't what it looked like. D-don't worry, everything's fine. L-let's go back to bed." She turned to leave the room in a final act of desperation, but of course, Marshall reached out and grabbed her, keeping her from escaping.

"No, I'm not gonna just let you lie like that anymore. Eve, w-what's happening? D-did...I do something? I-is this my fault?" Everest was having trouble keeping herself together by now, but somehow, she managed. She could feel her lip quivering as tears began to blur her vision, but she refused to break down in front of him. That would be weak, wouldn't it? And she couldn't bear Marshall seeing her in that helpless condition any more than he already had.

"N-no, no Marshy you did nothing. But, t-this isn't what it looks like, I-I swear," she insisted, thinking maybe if she pushed it hard enough she could convince him it was true. But of course, she knew he wasn't stupid, and the Dally knew it wasn't true it was as just as much as she did.

"Then what was it?!" He shouted in frustration, refusing to buy anything she was saying. At first, he was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume he was overreacting, letting himself buy into her lies. But that wasn't going to slide any more.

Now, the only thing in Everest's head was fear. Of course, he only raised his voice because both of them were stressed in the moment. However, that small mistake only terrified her more, ruining any chance that she would confess, if there even was one to begin with.

Normally, hiding her feelings wasn't hard at all, but with her mate clearly aware of her grim temptations and thoughts, it was becoming near impossible. He wasn't aware, but he was only pushing her buttons more and more.

"Eve, tell me, please. What is happening to you? W-why would you try and do something like this? Don't ignore me, you aren't getting out of it this time." Everest was forcing herself to use every last ounce of her strength to not run and hide, completely possessed the past that always haunted her, and now it was striking harder than ever.

"M-Marshy, I wasn't trying to do what you're thinking, this is just a misunderstanding. Don't worry, I'm fine, really. Just try and calm down, ok?" She pleaded, despite knowing how pointless it would be.

"Calm down? Calm down?! Eve, you just held a knife to your heart! How do you expect me to be calm right now?! Just tell me what's wrong so I can help you!" Tears were streaming down his face, coming from a mixture of emotions, mostly stress. The Husky only stood still, not budging nor saying a word, lost in her own painful world. "Everest, are you even listening to me?!"

She tried to answer, but no matter how much effort she put in, she just couldn't do it. The pressure was too much, it felt like there were a thousand pounds weighing her down, keeping her from doing much of anything. But at long last, she finally mustered up the courage to speak.

"I-I need to clear my head. Marshy, please don't follow me, I really just need to be alone for a bit," she muttered, walking past the Dally without exchanging a word more. Marshall was too stunned to reach out again and stop her, only leaving him all alone in worry and confusion.

She walked outside and jumped into her snowcat, hoping she'd be able to remember how to drive with a missing leg. Ryder had taught her that, and she had taken a practice round through town once or twice, so it hopefully wouldn't be too much of a problem. Thankfully, it all came back to her as drove off into the night, heading to the one place she knew she could be alone.

She could feel her tears streaming down her face and blowing in the wind, but that was all. Her mind had gone completely numb, not even able to process what had just happened. Despite everything, zero thoughts came to her. She felt empty, even more so than usual, which was certainly saying something.

Eventually, Everest arrived at her destination. A forest in Jake's mountain, one that if she followed the right path, would lead to a secluded opening. She grabbed an item from her vehicle and began the short hike, remembering exactly where to go. This was the same place she'd go every time she needed to be alone, but since she had moved into the lookout, this was the first time she deemed it necessary to go back.

"Jeez, I don't remember this being so tiring," she whispered aloud to herself. She knew she was close, but she was already exhausted. This was the first time she had walked in the snow since her amputation, not to mention this was a longer walk than what she had done since then. To say it was a challenge would've been an understatement.

At long last, she found the opening she had been longing to see. Her own private hiding place, even with a small shelter she built herself. Without wasting a moment more, she walked into her makeshift covering and flopped down on the ground, glad to finally be able to take a break.

And of course, slowly but surely, the reality crept up on her. Within seconds, she was violently weeping, realizing the truth of the matter. Marshall had finally caught her in the act, and there was nothing she could do to prove him wrong.

"You idiot!" She yelled at herself, finally coming to terms with it all, becoming furious with herself in the process. "All you had to do was hide it, now you couldn't even do that?! Marshy...w-what's he gonna think of me?!"

She threw her paws over her head in despair, beyond terrified of what would happen when she went back to the lookout. She felt so weak, as if she had failed the Dally. All she wanted now was to curl up in a little, fluffy ball, fall asleep in the cold, and never wake up.

Suddenly, the painful reminder of what she had brought with her came to her mind. Without giving any second thought on if this was a good idea, or if this is what anyone would want, she grabbed her razor and opened it. Tears, as they always did, escaped her eyes and landed in the frozen powder below her.

With a shaky grip, she forced the blade closer to her paw and got to work. However, unlike most times, she forced herself to make this different. After what had just happened tonight with Marshall, she refused to let herself stop where she normally would, getting to the point where she had turned her own paw into a bloody, painful mess.

The snow around her had been poisoned with crimson red spots as the Husky shut her eyes from the burning sensation coursing through her. The pain was nearly unbearable, it felt like she could pass out at any given moment. She had no doubt that this was the most she had ever done this, but only then was she finally satisfied to stop, at least until the next time she became a puppet to these urges.

Everest sat her paw down, and even that stung greatly after the amount of cuts she had inflicted on herself. But then again, her intentions were pain, and that was exactly what she had done. Even if she knew it wasn't healthy, it was the only form of coping her mind would allow her to do, holding her hostage from trying any new methods.

As the blood continued to pour, she could feel her eyes slowly begin to flutter. Whether it was from the stress, tiredness, cold, pain, or all of them in one, she didn't bother fighting it. In fact, she didn't want to resist at all, slightly hoping this was the end she dreamed of. The only thing she could make out as she drifted into unconsciousness was what seemed to be a pair of legs jogging towards her, but the darkness consumed her before she could give it any thought.

◾️◻️◻️⬛️◻️◻️◾️

When the Husky opened her eyes, instead of being still in the cold snow she was in just moments earlier, she found herself in a very different situation. Snuggled up tightly in a warm blanket, on a couch near a burning fire, warming her up. Her paw also had also been wrapped with a bandage, which she could see had already been stained red.

At first, she panicked, unfamiliar with her surroundings. However, after taking a closer look at the wooden walls, she quickly calmed down. After all, she was home, the only place besides the lookout she could really give the honor of that name. The Arctic, and of course where she was forced to live with her abusive mate she somehow used to think cared for her, certainly didn't deserve that title.

"Hot chocolate? Don't worry, I still held on to that type made for dogs," a sudden voice said. Just as Everest expected, her old owner sat down next to her, scooting her a bowl of the warm drink she loved. Already entranced by the delicious smell, she leaned closer and licked away, cleaning the bowl in a matter of seconds.

"T-thanks, Jake," she whispered as he sat down next to her, resting his hand on her back which was still mostly covered with the blanket he had given her, giving the pup small pets. The Husky leaned back on the couch, taking in the events that had happened earlier. She looked down at her paw, still all neatly wrapped up, and out of instinct she brought her mouth down and tried to lick her injury, only partially succeeding.

"Hey, dude, don't mess with it, that'll only make it worse. I think you've already done enough to that paw for one day." At first, Everest didn't mind anything he was saying, but suddenly caught wind of his implications and looked back up, unintentionally doing as he asked of her.

"W-wait, y-you saw me?" She asked, which unfortunately for her she got the feeling she knew the answer to already. Jake shrugged and leaned back as well. The Husky scooted closer to him, resting her head on his lap, earning her several scratches behind the ear.

"Well no, but your paw was covered with blood with an also bloody razor blade next to you. It wasn't hard to figure out what had happened, especially with Ryder telling me Marshall used to do something similar," he explained. Everest nodded slowly, realizing it was impossible to just throw on a smile and escape this problem.

"I-I'm sorry, I know y-you're probably disappointed." The boy raised an eyebrow and shook his head, confusing her at first. Surely, after all she had done to herself, he'd have feel some sort of resentment against her for it, right?

"What? No, I'm not disappointed at all. But...I'm worried. Just, why would you go and do something like that? Why were you even out there at this hour? It's five in the morning." Naturally, the Husky got nervous with both questions.

Either one would be just as difficult to answer truthfully, but she couldn't just not answer. The pressure was building up, until finally, her walls broke down. She let everything out, like a dam being let loose, finally unfiltering her feelings to someone after all this time of hiding.

"Because I'm an idiot, Jake! I'm too stupid and weak to actually do something right for once, so I cut myself, 'cause what else am I supposed to do to feel better?!" She blurted out, not even noticing the levels of what she was admitting. "B-but then Marshy...s-something happened, and I-I got scared and...I...I-I ran. I...I left him..."

Naturally, this whole time Jake had expected her to have some sort of outburst, so it wasn't at all a surprise when she suddenly hugged him, sobbing in the process. He held his old pup closer as she continued to pour out her emotions, knowing that he wasn't Marshall, and that letting her get it out was probably the best he could do for her now.

"Y-you should've just left me out there, i-it would've been better for everyone if I-I..." the Husky trailed off, getting interrupted by her own tears. The boy only shook his head and pet her head.

"Everest, that wouldn't have solved anything. You should be glad Ryder called me and said you had run off, otherwise you might've gotten your wish." Soon after, the pup managed to stop crying, at least enough to where she could speak clearly.

"D-do they know I'm here?" She asked, worried that the others, or mainly Marshall, would show up any second. Even if everyone else didn't know her situation, the Dally certainly did, and she just couldn't bring herself to face him after what had happened.

"No, I haven't told them yet. But Ryder did say Marshall seemed to be freaking out a bit with you gone, and I assume you'd wanna see him, so I can go ahead and let him know you're here."

The Husky had to stifle her urge to shout out and tell him not to, purely out of her worries. As scared as she was, for his own good, she had to let them come. Even if he was getting better, she wasn't surprised that her mate still got nervous and stressed if she wasn't around. It would be selfish to hide here, cowering under her cloud of insecurities.

"A-alright, s-sure, you can call them," she muttered. Jake nodded and pulled out his phone, and it seemed almost the second he pressed the dial button he started talking to Ryder. Clearly, the others were anxious, which only pushed her guilt.

Within only a minute, the boy set his device down and turned back to her. "Yep, they're on their way. So until then, why don't you tell me what happened? I know you only go to that place when you're really stressed, did something happen with Marshall? You mentioned him earlier."

Everest paused, realizing everything she'd have to admit if she actually told him the truth. Lying was always the easiest, and it got her out of most situations, but something told her that wouldn't work now. Then again, it would spare her the pain of explaining, so it was worth a shot.

"I-I just had a nightmare, that's all. Probably overreacted a bit, and uh..." She looked up, seeing Jake raising an eyebrow with an obvious unconvinced look on his face. The Husky sighed, realizing that if she wanted a way out, it'd have to be truthful. "M-Marshy...h-he saw me trying to...kill myself. I d-didn't, obviously, I-I stopped myself, b-but he knew."

Everest shut her eyes in anticipation, readying herself for the negative reaction that was sure to come. Whether she would be called weak, told off as overreacting, or even hurt, she braced herself. However, when not even a peep came out of her old owner, she was forced to look open her eyes and face him.

"A-are you serious?" He asked. The Husky wasn't sure if that was a bad sign or not, but regardless, she used every ounce of her willpower to deliver a single, small nod. She saw Jake's hand move closer to her, and she immediately sunk her head as deep into the couch as she possibly could, fearing that this was the harmful reaction she assumed would come. However, the impact was anything but painful, as the boy slowly pet her, filling her mind with confusion.

"Wait...y-you're...not mad?" She whispered in shock, feeling the tension in her body lower as she allowed herself to relax as the skier continued to comfort her.

"Dude, of course I'm not mad, I'm just...surprised," he answered, still in disbelief the pup he always saw as happy and cheery felt the need to do something like that. Her characteristics seemed everything but someone who'd wanna harm themselves as much as she clearly did.

Everest sighed in relief, but that wasn't anywhere near her biggest worries. Whatever questions that would come next would only tear at her more, forcing her to open up about the feelings and thoughts she desperately hid for years. However, Jake took note of her obvious anxiety. "Don't worry, girl, I won't push it anymore. Besides, that's a conversation for you and Marshall to have."

She was surprised at his understanding to say the least, but she wasn't going to complain. She stayed silent as she tried her best to mentally prepare for what was to come, with the only sound being the crackling of the fire. Whatever would happen, she knew would change her permanently, for better or for worse. It was only a matter of time, and if she was ready to face the constant fear she had been hiding for years was still a doubt, plaguing her with uncontrollable fear.

And as if on cue, the Husky heard a new sound, telling her that she couldn't hide any longer. Terror took over her body as she cowered behind Jake, her breaths getting faster and her paws getting shakier by the second. It was a simple sound, one she had heard countless times, but only now did it have a deeper meaning and possibly even threat.

It was the sound of the cabin door being knocked.